NFL News:
- Word broke over the weekend that Jerry Jones is leading a group of 17 owners “reviewing” Roger Goodell’s possible contract extension.
- Which, of course, has nothing to do whatsoever, no sir, not one bit, with the upcoming Ezekiel Elliott suspension appeal appeal.
- JESUS TAPDANCING CHRIST!
- Zach Miller almost lost his leg as a result of his dislocated knee in the endzone, implying he tore or otherwise damaged the femoral artery during the injury.
- They had to get a graft from his other leg to stabilize it.
- To quote cbssports.com, “to make matters worse: Miller’s touchdown didn’t count. After an official review, the touchdown was overturned, which seems absurd considering there definitely didn’t appear to be irrefutable evidence.”
- There is no goddamned way I am linking a gif or video of that here. It was gruesome.
- Zach Miller almost lost his leg as a result of his dislocated knee in the endzone, implying he tore or otherwise damaged the femoral artery during the injury.
- The World Series outdrew Sunday Night Football in the TV ratings.
- Well, duh – they had as much scoring, and more exciting plays.
- Sunday Night Football had Al Michaels making Jerome Bettis references, and Cris Collinsworth shilling his interest in Pro Football Focus without admitting his connection on the broadcast.
- Well, duh – they had as much scoring, and more exciting plays.
Game Preview: Broncos at Chiefs
This game seems part of a plot by Andy Reid to ensure no one wins the AFC West. The quality of opponent the Chiefs have faced during their losing streak is an escalating pile of shit. The Steelers that beat the Chiefs two weeks ago are a much better team today, although only beating the Lions by 5 points could be a troubling sign. The Raiders appeared cromulent in beating the Chiefs during the two-hour final seconds last Thursday, but then turned in a turd against the Bills. Tonight’s opponent has had only two good quarterbacks in the last 10 years, Peyton Manning V.2 & Tim Tebow J.3:16. Future saviour Paxton Lynch is inactive tonight, in favour of Brock Osweiler. The Broncos only average 18 points per game, the 18th best scoring offence in the NFL.
By design, this game should be an easy walk for the Chiefs.
AND YET!
Tonight marks the return of Jamaal Charles to KC, albeit in a Broncos uniform, so his season-ending injury may not occur until after halftime. But before that happens, look for the Broncos to try & get him going and take advantage of his desire to exact some measure of revenge. Denver defence seems designed exactly to mess with Alex Smith’s mind, and Von Miller has sacked Smith 8 times since 2014. So if the deep routes fail early look for him to revert to his previous title of the Checkdown King. Finally, Andy Reid is their head coach, so expect some quality timeout or time management fuckups issues at least once during the game.
It could either be a Chiefs 30-point blowout or a Broncos 2-point win. At least the NFL doesn’t have to worry about competing against baseball tonight.
Tonight’s sports:
- NFL:
- Denver Broncos at Kansas City Chiefs – 8:15PM | ESPN / TSN
- en espanol en ESPN2
- Denver Broncos at Kansas City Chiefs – 8:15PM | ESPN / TSN
- MLS: Playoffs
- New York Red Bulls vs. Toronto FC (Leg 1) – 7:00PM | FS1 / TSN3
- Houston Dynamo vs. Portland Timbers (Leg 1) – 9:30PM | FS1 / TSN3
- NHL:
- Bruins at Blue Jackets – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
- NBA:
- Spurs at Celtics – 7:30PM | Sportsnet1
- WWE:
- Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
- Let’s see who’s returned from the mumps!
- Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
I don’t know who bought MLB’s soul, but the based ball people have managed to put together two consecutive seasons of quality World Series’, and five not-bad ones total since 2012. (The Giants thumping the Tigers in 2012 was just awful; Verlander hasn’t forgotten.) Tonight’s NFL contest may make you long for another Astros-Dodgers game. HOW THE HELL DID THAT HAPPEN?!
Bumpity bumpity
_ _ _ _ _ N | _ _ _ _ _ N | _ _ _ _ _ L L _
H
No H
I think we need to buy an E
Good call:
_ E _ E _ N | _ _ _ _ _ N | _ E _ _ _ L L E
Unless that was just an ecstasy joke. I’m not hip.
It wasn’t, but if you have some I’m willing to listen.
But no butt stuff.
“Trent Green Bay!”
– Trent Green
I have one.
_ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ _
A category would be nice.
Greedy sonsofbitches
Same as Dok. NFL before and after.
N
_ _ _ _ _ N | _ _ _ _ _ N | _ _ _ _ _ _ _
R
R
Like in Boston, no R
L
Copy cat not reading in bed liar.
We got different refresh cycles. Also, I had to brush my teeth first.
😀
T
No T
Witten Kitten Factory.
If only there had been T’s
And a different category
You mean the one you wouldn’t reveal?
I’m still skeptical you even told the truth on that when pressed.
YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH IN FAKE WHEEL OF FORTUNE WITHOUT A WHEEL. IT’S JUST OF FORTUNE
Okay, Imma go read in bed, but I like this guessing lark, we’ll do it agains
I don’t know, You’re all winners!
Woooo, let’s all touch penises!!!!!
No?
Ok, maybe later.
So remember way back when DFO started and I did PK mad libs? Maybe once I get settled into new job, I should start up something similar again?
Btw bet the guy who rejected my entreaties to acquire Zeke this past week is feeling dumber than a Jaguars fan in the empty meth lab
Is sadness the same as dumbness?
I wish
Sadly, it can be.
Okay, still half NFL, still before and after.
_ _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _
THE|EAGLES|SUCK
Damn, I wish. Next time!
N
_ _ N | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _
R
_ _ N | _ _ _ _ _ R | _ _ _ _
L
Good one!
_ _ N | _ _ LL _ R | L _ _ _
Buy a vowel: A
No A
Jon Miller Lite
(shit jon miller is baseball dammit)
Close
Von Miller Lite
Von.
Goddammit
Like taking candy from a wee baby
Only bcuz I GAVE it to you with my guess. 😛
Ron Mexico Flag
LET’S PLAY AGAIN….C’MON DOK!!!!!!
Okay…stay within NFL theme or branch out?
Just none of the crossword puzzles. Those are just plain asinine.
I think that’s your call, Dok Sajak.
Is Zymm still doing Wheel of Fortune?
I’ll do another Thursday night. This was pretty fun.
I missed it. Stoopid kids and dog.
Zymm, is there a C?
And since we’re not spinning, isn’t this just team hangman?
Believe it or not, this was not me.
It’s NFL Before and After, and sorry, no C
Jordy nelson agholor
WINNER
Fuck you Ayo.
You’d have hit Bankrupt in realsies.
Love you too, sweetheart
THERE ARE TWO N’S DOKTOR
Whatevs, I’m not a Doktor of Spelling
This threw me too. I demand a refund!
The last time the holoshed was on the fritz I got hit with 3 paternity suits
well, Siemian knows how to pad his stat line in a way I wish Cousins had.
Adding in the ‘L’ and buying an ‘A’
_ _ _ _ _ | N _ L S _ _ | A _ _ _ _ _ _
G
_ _ _ _ _ | N _ L S _ _ | A G _ _ _ _ _
I still want a T
You can want one all you want, no T
_ouché
NAGGERS!
Major Nelson Aguilar
Shit never mind….missing A
And the 2nd N
Shut up. 😛
Okay, KC fans support a racist chant with a chop and oppose protesting racial injustice by kneeling.
Pretty sure that’s the definition of consistency
Okay, Redacteds have a racist name. Chiefs win on EVERYTHING ELSE.
What’s worse:
A) A bunch of white people doing the tomahawk chop in Missouri?
Or
B) A bunch of white people doing the tomahawk chop in Atlanta?
Yes?
What are we? Chopped liver?
– White people of Tallahassee
C) A bunch of illiterate students doing it at Florida State?
Trainer Who Accused Peyton Manning of Sexual Assault Speaks Out: He ‘Sat His Anus’ On My Face
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=2&v=_M4fKRSq0ZM
Go on. – Aaron Rodgers.
Wonder if it was prepared.
Hence the “dingleberry” nickname
oh ew
And his family and school covered it up; we live in a great world.
Just to followup on the post below. The Clintons have helped the Republicans more than either of them care to admit.
Wheel of Fortune category Before and After :
_ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Dammit, it took out the spaces
Still going? N!
_ _ _ _ _ | N _ _ S _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ _
T
Pat I’d like to solve the puzzle…
Aaron Nutsak Rodgers
I presume that’s not right….but it should be.
a) I would never misspell nutsack
b) it doesn’t fit the format of before and after
Still funny tho.
S
_ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ S _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ _
P
BUZZZZZZ Nope
Can I buy a vowel? A
L
Let’s be honest, Siemian has looked even worse than his stat line. Elway needs to help a brother out and take him out back and put him out of his misery.
And then what? Lobster is worse, Lynchston is worse……. but at this rate maybe when Paxton is healthy see what you have. They also have two TERRIBLE OLmen.
I see the point, clearly Siemian isn’t the only problem by a long shot. But I think you at least try Lobster, see if it gives the team a jolt. There’s only so long you can let such hideous play ride when you have any kind of alternative.
He is worse at this point and even less mobile, but what the hell.
I thought you were more supportive of shooting broken down horses
[cool air blows through grille in Spanish]
Murder ball for Devontae Booker.
And Zack Miller
He still got both legs?
I kinda feel badly for cutting him last week now.
yeah, the emergency vascular surgery was successful, apparently really was touch and go
That’s not nice to make fun of him when he’s down. He just needs a leg up and he’ll be back
SIEMIAN IS STILL IN THE GAME. His sister must have taken a shit on Vance Joseph’s tummy or sommet.
Hey Shari Lewis was hot when she was young. i feel uneasy thinking about all the harassment she must have had gone through. I bet some exec made her “use the puppets”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbaO_sKmV0U
Don’t be so quick to judge; those in glass houses and whatnot.
Hippo is now in love
I rubbed heroin on a beaver once….. it was an actual beaver tho.
Beaver to Moose: Hey thanks man. Instead of eating that tree, Imma fuck it.
DAM IT!
Bad quarterbacks are bad
That CB must be going against the KC D/ST. No other reason for why he didn’t score there.
Bring out the curtain and put him down.
quack quack
See? Bitches can’t drive!
We had a speaker from legal today who asked if everyone was familiar with the definition of “conflict of interest”
I didn’t yell out anything about the prez, but that’s because I’m only comfortable yelling stuff when I’m drunk and with people I know
Do strangers in the internet count?
Of course! Hence “Ass Herpes!”
I hope the Russia thing ends up being significant enough that it sparks a whole new suffix in scandals. No more will everything be -gate, it will be -gateski!
http://prussianmemes.tumblr.com/post/166295980590/i-hope-everybody-can-enjoy-the-typical-day-at-the
Former Trump adviser Carter Page now says Russia ‘may have come up’ in campaign emails.
He has to have a plea deal because if he doesn’t………FUCK… it hurts my mind how dumb these people are. This can’t be real.
Stupid Watergate is stupid
1) It’s embarrassing how stupid our leaders are.
2) Hillary and her people were defeated by them, which makes them even dumber.
3) Meritocracy is officially dead as dogshit.
I’m rooting for a meteor still
we kind of are getting the meteor. It’s not like HillyBob is coming back, we doesn’t have your fancy-pants parliamentary system
I listened to a lot of NPR on my drive x-country, and they had one guy on who compared the current Republican house/senate/wh conglomeration to a coalition government, since they don’t agree on shit
I don’t know that meritocracy is dead (or any deader than it was 100 years ago). What is dead is the idea of politics as public service. There are many repellent aspects to the idea of noblisse oblige, but it remained a prominent idea in politics up until probably 50 years ago? Whether I agree or disagree with someone, I’ll have a lot more respect for their opinion if I feel like they’re ultimately trying to work for the public good, and I don’t see much of that anymore. I was a Hillary fan, and I thought she had some of that. I was actually surprised she ran, just from the amount of shit she had to put up with.
YUP
I haven’t seen a Siemian that scared since they brought Amy back to the Congo!
Just looked at patriots QB depth chart and practice squad.
>>>erection intensify
I think I’m the backup
That clock management was so bad Andy Reid thinks he’s coaching the Broncos
My team won a pub trivia contest on a final answer of “Charlie in the Box”
RIP
THIS FACTOR GRADE I CALL IT JON GRUDEN BECAUSE IT MAKES NO SENSE AND DETRACTS FROM THE ENJOYABILITY OF THE GAME
Nothing like funerals to bring out in fighting in the family. Glad I’m with the sane ones. They brought booze
There are Irish Canadians?
My grandfather is the son of a preacher who was also a potato farmer in rural Prince Edward Island. If that’s not Irish as fuck, I dunno what is.
I was in Quebec City in March. They have a giant st Patrick’s day/ beer festival. I was surprised at the Irish population there
The English hated those damn dirty Catholics, so the French and the Irish got along swimmingly back in those days, especially since church services were all in Latin, thus not catering heavily to one side or the other. It was actually a pretty effective system… minus all the poverty and systemic discrimination, but, y’know, minor details…
Ah, the good old days, where we were so homogeneous we had to pick other types of Christianity to discriminate against!
Filthy Prod bastards.
I hope Brady gets hurts and doom the Pats into a 20 year playoff drought.
I want to see Hoyer Country have to quartered back them. In the playoffs.
Banner quote of the year?
Banner quote: I hope Brady kills the team and then kills everybody and then they have to cancel the game because everybody is dead and then Brady kills himself.
Did Brady’s corpse look at you?
In come Johnny Football off the streets to to turn the Patriots locker room to a drug den with underage hookers.
Gronk perks up.
If’n I knew how to make a banner quote, I sure would make this one right fucking now.
– Bitter NC State/Everton/Broncos fan
Quote Emeritus
The Beaver gone wild.
Time to pack it in and go play tiddlywinks or something, kid.
USMT could use a defender that committed and effective.
Yes, that’s all of it.
This is why I’m afraid to date.
You’re a Mary Ann guy?
I like both.
I’m just an undateable cretin.
Noticeable lack of NFL cheerleaders halloween costumes this year. You think the league is discouraging this tradition?
Every other form of pageantry they touch turns to shit, so I guess they figured “why take a chance?”
Tiny Hands freaks out when a black guy gets within like 5 yards of him
But enough about Donald Trump, folks!!
You’re referring to Trump, right?
that would be 5 blocks
He’s the kind of guy who would fire the butler who’s been working in the White House since Truman was president just to give it to some Mar-a-Lago greens manager because the former was making him “too uncomfortable.”
Alright, the give-a-fuckometer has dropped to empty, so I’ll take my leave and bid you all sweet dreams.
Later, Taters!
Nighty nite!
Right behind you.
So to speak.
Double J has a capable cabal that can lead a coup in the NFL. Unlike other powerful people, he’s seems to know his limits and hires people smarter than him to do is business.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ugip_8BNfkA
Highly recommended commercial break reading: https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/10/29/john-boehner-trump-house-republican-party-retirement-profile-feature-215741
.
I refuse to pronounce his name any other way than “Boner”
It’s not a mature rebellion, but eh
That issue features prominently in the first half of the piece.
Nope, I’m fine. No problems.
So is there any particular CBD oil I should try?
Do they make a massage oil?
I have no idea. I know it can be used a couple of ways, but I’m not even sure where to begin.
the “That’s Good Broncos” guy was sponsored by one for awhile, but I forget which. Moose?
/realize this was unhelpful but I am the worst
No idea; I by teh bud.
We can haz game?
Ok kitty!