Your “Mastersmania Sunday!” Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

Sometimes, you just gotta go with the classics.

By the time this thread goes live, the Masters should be wrapping up, unless there’s a playoff, and Wrestlemania should be three hours into its seven-hour run time. I have friends attending each, in differing states of inebriation.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Panthers at Bruins – 7:30PM | Sportsnet / NHLN
  • NBA:
    • Warriors at Suns – 9:00PM | Sportsnet1  / NBA TV
  •  MLB:
    • Mets at Nationals – 8:00PM | ESPN / TSN3
  • MLS:
    • Los Angeles Galaxy vs. Sporting KC – 9:00PM | FS1
  • Curling:
    • World Men’s Championship: gold-medal game – 8:00PM | NBCSN / TSN

You’ll have guest hosts the next couple of nights, as we’re getting a Ministry audit at school, and prep for that & inspection will eat up a lot of my time the next couple of days. THEY BETTER NOT LOOK IN MY DRAWER!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.

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GratliffBrettFavresColonoscopyWakezillaBrick MeathooktheeWeeBabySeamus Recent comment authors
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Gratliff

I missed all the good shit as the fuckers in my family all decided Mania was the best time to drag him off into drama for shit, but I just wanted to highlight this amazing caption during Elias’ music interlude.

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Wakezilla

I’m surprised so many people liked the Garganno/Ciampa match. I thought it was about 10-15 minutes too long and way too much of an ROH match, which isn’t my jam.

Gratliff

A lot of the time spent was milking the drama. It’s a solid 5-10 minutes shorter without it. It had some amazing spots, callbacks, no less than 83 abs between the two of them (does Ciampa fucking eat at all?), and 2 or 3 of the best false finishes I’ve ever seen (Project Ciampa from the top rope being the best). Also, Ciampa having a true heel heat unmatched in the industry right now adds a lot of significance to the moments as they unfolded, so the payoff was fantastic.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hatred of people reconfirmed

Wakezilla

What happened?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The usual?

Mainly first world problems, but something about airports brings out the worst in people.

theeWeeBabySeamus

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yep, can see my building if you know where to look.
One month from today you fucking heathens.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Gotta bust my ass harder tomorrow working out and walking.

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Jimmy Conway really went all out practicing for the Lufthansa heist.

Senor Weaselo

Damn, beat me to it.

theeWeeBabySeamus

My model Cessna 172 looks kinda shitty now.

Thanks man.

Senor Weaselo

“Yoink!” -Jimmy “The Gent” Burke

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Stupid sexy Cheetahs.

Senor Weaselo

So I haven’t harped on this but SPYRO TRILOGY REMAKE FUCK AND YES. Here’s some Stewart Copeland to celebrate.
/This was the music for the penultimate boss fight in the first game

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Stick your tongue out there! Only 3,000 rpm test.

theeWeeBabySeamus

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, screw you guys. I gotta go finish getting drunk then watch zombies. Then eat dinner…YES IT’S 12:26 AND I HAVEN’T EATEN YET.

Then maybe rub one out.

Then I think I’m ‘uhsposed to do tomorrow’s open thread.

Shit.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The little first class fucker is watching a cartoon about roulette! Maybe he’s one of us.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Tell him Hippo is all in on Black.

He’ll know what it means.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Amazing how much of a dramatic difference upping a little contrast can make.

Brocky

Yep. Contrast.

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Fucking MPAA sucks ass.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Wow those old bulbs really make a difference from that far away

Brocky

anyways, the “nicholas joke” explanation

wrestlemania: 2 bad guys are tag champs. facing 1 gigantic good guy, who has to find a partner to face them for the tag titles.

good guy up to this point has been a loner, so he hasn’t picked a partner. anyways, comes time for the match, he just goes out into the crow, and picks a kid to be his partner.

big guy wins by himself, so him and kid are tag champs.

I’m not making this up.

so yeah, kid is named nicholas, i googled “nicholas in wwe” and that picture of ziggler came up. who got pushed to the pre show, while a random 10 year old is now is a tag champ.

I find odd things funny okay.

Senor Weaselo

That is pretty hilarious, but I have to wonder how the kid’ll be when he has to defend the belt.

theeWeeBabySeamus

80s, bitches!!!!!

Horatio Cornblower

GREAT tune.

King Hippo

holy cats, Dirt Jest are 9-1!?

King Hippo

FUN FACT! One of only two sides (along with Most Glorious el beisbol Cardinals, naturally) that I put $25 or $50 on to win the World Series opening week.

#BFIB were +1900, Dirt Jest +2850. Looks like a bargain!

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK Pete, we really need to talk.

– Marge Schott

King Hippo

“What did the Jews do this time, Marge”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehehehehe

Senor Weaselo

Oh goody, Grit Sawx and Dirt Jest have 2 losses between them. Pardon me for not jumping for joy and instead debating the merits of being a sommelier for shotgun shells.

theeWeeBabySeamus

12:09 am.

Time to get slap ass drunk methinks.

Brocky

slap or sleep or both?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Depends on what kinda porn I can find before I pass out.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Agreed

Senor Weaselo

Did you say slap-ass?

King Hippo

the limiting of mound visits is the most inconsequential rule change EVAR

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Stanley Kubrick-ass terminal

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Got upgraded for this flight and have to ask: why the fuck pay for a first class ticket for a 5 year old kid?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Meritocracy, bro.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Because 79th month abortions aren’t legal?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Yet

King Hippo

/calculating what fookin’ trimester I am in now

King Hippo

I mean, ain’t the first class experience ruined by having your shitty 5-year old in it with you?

Brocky

this image is so great without context:

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Wow there’s a wrestler named Dolph Ziggler? That’s like Dirk Diggler’s brother.

Brocky

You joke, but I’m 90% ziggler came up with that name as an homage to boogie nights, and no one wwe picked up on it.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I believe it!

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I’m slightly disappointed that there’s no “accidental” porn tab visible.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Someone’s mom is about to have an enjoyable evening.

King Hippo

The opposing manager in that almost brawl? Apologized to Yadi after the game. As well he should.

King Hippo

hey, I know! Let’s stay up all night watching the Dirt Jest and Redacteds jerk each other off! Why not start the week off right?

/I insurance bet the Dacteds in the 6th, so the outcome is now functionally equivalent

Horatio Cornblower

I took the next two days off and am well into the beer fridge, while trying to write a poem for a friend’s 50th birthday so…challenge accepted?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

What do you think of Godless?

Horatio Cornblower

Only on the 2nd episode but it’s good so far. A little concerned that the Jeff Bridges character is so evil as to become a cartoon.

But I’m a sucker for Westerns, so I am going to finish it by Tuesday night.
/shitty “spring” weather is going to help

King Hippo

Just draw a giant, black penis and be done!

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Giant Black Penis is your answer to everything!

King Hippo

well, is there ANYTHING it can’t do??

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Shop without being followed by security.

Fronkenshteen

I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about!

King Hippo

I made GAMBLOR on the Mets. First bet came good when Mets were ahead after 5 innings (5-4), covered the other one by betting on the Nats so I make about same moneys either way now on overall match.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Seamus, I found someone to cover for you tomorrow.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

No opposable thumbs. Can’t be trusted foar surgical knots.

King Hippo

He is planning to let all patients die anyway, as he judges them unworthy of sharing his oxygen.

I often wonder what Mengele would have done had he only managed to train cat assistants.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

“I’m sorry but we need to send your puppers to his dirt nap.”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Goddammit Dr. Kitty!!! Stop killin’ all teh dogz!!!!!!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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