TGISF… Slip It In The Five Hole

Yeah sure, it’s Friday the 13th.  But we’re ignoring that.  Mostly because I just did that six months ago.

But, did I ever tell you guys I got married on a Friday the 13th?  True story, Bro.

My marriage sucked all teh ass.  It almost killed me (literally), truth be told.  Not because it started on a Friday the 13th.  But rather because I was an idiot.  I can own that.

I’m not bitter….YOU’RE BITTER!!!!!!

(ahem)

We live and we learn.  Hopefully.

Sadly, sometimes we don’t learn as quickly as we should.  Sometimes, we even repeat past mistakes (and by “we”, of course I mean “me” because I’m stupid).  But, as long as we’re still above ground and trying, that’s what counts.  And hopefully, eventually, we recognize our shitty patterns of mistakes moar quickly the next time around.

Fortunately, I did.  Doesn’t make it feel better, but I am kinda proud I didn’t let it almost kill me this time.

Hockey Girls

Last year, I almost blew it.  I waited and waited and waited.  And I almost waited too long.

This year, we’re doing it early.  The opening round of the Stanley Cup Playoffs has just begun.  No procrastinating this year.

I love hockey.  I didn’t watch as much of it this season as I would have liked.  But the playoffs are here and it’s time to overdose on it…. now that it’s 80° outside.  SMGDH.  But still…

Sexy Hockey Girls!!!!!!!!

Woooooo!!!!!!!

I’m going to try my best not to repeat any from last year.  But no promises because some of them were pretty damned hot.  Let’s see what happens.

Enjoy….

 

My thoughts exactly, Noob Noob.

I think my ice is melting.

Yeah I Know

A lot of you are gonna hate me for this one.  But I’m doing it anyway.

Yes I feel kinda dirty now.  But I’m also giggling my ass off.

Which is better than last night when I wanted to drive to our nation’s capital and murderize Evgeny Kuznetsov.  Fucking idiot.  I hope you silly DC Russians still like spring golf.  You’ll get to the course earlier this year apparently.

Have a great weekend everyone.

Love ya’s!!!

(except for you stinking Yinzers)

Grumble, Grumble.

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theeWeeBabySeamus
An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it's a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles. When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
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Unsurprised

This instantly made me think of Brick, which … I guess that’s good for him?

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Unsurprised

Symbolism?

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Horatio Cornblower

It’s that time of the night…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvXmtkl4Nmk

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

“I told you to keep your ass out of the kiddie pool.” -Roy Moore’s political advisors

Horatio Cornblower

“No.”-Roy Moore

Horatio Cornblower

Motherfucker was fine the next day. Think he slept on it wrong and sprained it. Love the little bastard but he is absolutely dumb enough to do that.

Horatio Cornblower

Thanks for the advice early on. It did settle us down.

“Don’t worry honey, one of the deviants I hang out with on the internet is a vet!”

How my wife hasn’t left me yet is a mystery right up there with Where’s Jimmy Hoffa.

Fronkenshteen

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Horatio Cornblower

HOW DO WE MAKE ICE!?!?!?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

Unsurprised, from the DFO Times: Question. HOW DO YOU FUCKING BLOW OPEN AN ICEHOLE IN A HOCKEY RINK!?!!?!

Senor Weaselo
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQkBeOisNM0

I’m a sucker for good percussion.

Also boobs, but this is mostly for the percussion.

Spur

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Spur

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Unsurprised

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

I wish all of those people would spontaneously combust.

Senor Weaselo

He seems great at parties.

Unsurprised

He’s never been to a party.

Senor Weaselo

Because he’s so great at them he puts everyone off, obviously.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

People who have never seen something sometimes have trouble comprehending its existence.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Clitoris and unicorn?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’m never sure how to take that comment.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

A friend of mine was getting his plant ecology PHD, and he seemed to be able to choose lab assistant undergrad who looked like that. Fucker.

Unsurprised

Too smrt for your own good.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Yeah, it just sounds like a stupid sexist comment, but I see how you mean it now. On that note; if she’s a going for the PHD; it would be biology, maybe chemistry, not history.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No, I meant it sounds like the old ‘women ur stoopid’ thing, not how you meant it, which is kinda opposite of that.

Horatio Cornblower

Or cold.

Horatio Cornblower

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTvnL1jWNao

It’s long, but her shirt’s mostly unbuttoned so just shut up and watch it.

Unsurprised

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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GRAB THE SHOULDERS!

Unsurprised

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Spur

will there be a liveblog for the NBA playoff games tomorrow?

Gratliff

Sixers virtually guaranteed to follow a 16 game win streak with getting swept by Miami

Horatio Cornblower

Somewhere else, sure.

Senor Weaselo

I wrote a preview actually! Here it is:
https://tenor.com/view/traviskelce-gif-4991027

Spur

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Unsurprised

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Fronkenshteen

Major General James “Spider” Marks – the TRUE czar of the telestrator!

Spur

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Horatio Cornblower
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

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Senor Weaselo

Get outta the fucking street!

Fronkenshteen

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Fronkenshteen

How do you bomb a chemical weapons storage facility in a large city like Damascus without, y’know, poisoning everyone?

Mr. Ayo

PRECISION strikes

Unsurprised

You can’t.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Judging from the middle, you’re gonna be the second one to do it.

Unsurprised

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Spur

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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

Coachella is one of the best times of the year.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Is she still married to David Copperfield? Because that was his greatest trick ever.

Unsurprised

No. She’s married to some British movie producer and has a bunch of kids.

Horatio Cornblower

That’s somehow even worse.

For teenage me, I mean. I’m sure Claudia’s doing great.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

I made that.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur

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Spur
King Hippo

Atlanta is the 2nd best show on teevee right now.

Spur
King Hippo

that episode was fucking bonkers

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Chad Green bails out Betances.

Maybe he can give him a lift to Scranton while he’s at it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

perfection!

Spur
King Hippo

Shitting on the Cowboys’ WR corps:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4icUyXw1E2Q

Spur

the hardest thing about the Dez cut was the off season admission that Dez caught the ball in Green Bay. Fuck the Packers! and Fuck you Rodgers! (an asshole is an asshole, gay or straight!)

Horatio Cornblower

To have a corps you need more than one.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dropped some change…. apparently.

Unsurprised

I must’ve missed this one.

Horatio Cornblower

I really need to know how this story ends.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He pulls over and takes a nap; then feeling dehydrated he drinks a lot of water.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Also from a nap and dehydrated…… but much more dried jiz on his jorts.

Unsurprised

Hands at ten and two in the pink.

Horatio Cornblower

I once pleasured my wife for five straight hours.

And I swear to Christ that is the last time I EVER go furniture shopping!!!

Unsurprised

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Spur

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ballsofsteelandfury

Giants – Dockers in 90 minutes…

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

I guess this is why people still watch The Walking Dead.

Unsurprised

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Horatio Cornblower

8-6. Betances has given up five hits. Aaron Boone has finally realized you can use more than one pitcher and inning, so that’s something.

Senor Weaselo

“You just can’t use a pitcher for more than one inning.” -Gabe Kapler

Horatio Cornblower

That fucking guy.

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

Good morning.

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Horatio Cornblower

I see her cherry’s gone.

King Hippo

This is a delightful, underrated band.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3TQKEUne5Q

Unsurprised

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Spur
Spur

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Wakezilla

You think UK and France joining Trump is good until you realize May is grasping onto straws and Marcon thinks he’s a literal god and is intervening because France still sees Syria as a colony.

ballsofsteelandfury

This. This isn’t exactly the alliance of the good guys.

Why the fuck do we give a shit about Syria anyway?

Unsurprised

Israel, Turkey, and Saudi Arabia hate Assad for various reasons like their tenuous connections to Iran and Hizbollah. Turkey wants land and to kill their Kurds. Saudi hates non-Sunni. Israel hates them all and has a creepily and powerful alliance with SA. And above all else, there’s a shit ton of financial interests involved.

King Hippo

Everybody (in power) in the Middle East is fucking terrible. Anytime anyone gets involved, it’s for moneys.

ballsofsteelandfury

Exactamundo.

Unsurprised

Oh, yeah. That’s totally true.

I would be happy with all of those governments’ leaders gone, but there are literally no good replacement options in Syria and probably not any reasonable ones in any other countries in the region except for some Kurdish areas. I mean, ISIS and Al Nusra are both offshoots of Al Qaeda and the U.S. (the CIA, anyway) is supporting goddamn Al Qaeda in Syria in support of regime change “… because …” I guess that’s all our policy has ever been towards Syria. So we are now allied with a group that even five years ago was still a mortal, existential enemy of the U.S.

It’s all fucking bullshit.