Good morning everyone!

I hope everyone has had a festive weekend full of frivolity and madcap shenanigans. Or at least a weekend where you sat in air conditioning in your underwear drinking copious amounts of alcohol.

That’s OK too.

There’s been a lot of bitching about the heat lately so I’ll try not to dwell on that too much. Apart to say that it’s been hotter than a motherfucker lately. We’ve had a double dose of excitement first with the heat and now we’ve got a really swell covering of smoke and ash blowing over the top of us from the fires inland from us. Really fun thing about the Riverside County fire, some dipshit set that shit on purpose.

There’s a special place in Hell for you asshole and I hope somebody expedites your pathetic ass to that destination directly. I’ll bet there is no shortage of firefighters who would airlift his worthless hide directly into a hotspot. Cocksucker.

Enough of that. We have happy things to discuss. Like recipes and grilling and creamy cheesy things and beer and the like.

We’ll get to that in a second.

Last week I had the always enjoyable annual check-up and I’m happy to say that everything is A-OK. The doctors are happy and amazed at my current health. They even told me I could reduce a medication I take by half. I’m down 15 pounds from last year and I’m probably stronger than I’ve ever been.

Fun fact of life for you younger folks: when you get older you will be issued medications. It’s going to happen. This is from someone who exercises at least 6 days a week and usually 7 days. It’s based on heredity, lifestyle, and of course the big conspiracy of the health care industry to ensure better living through chemistry.

The fun part is the doctor told me I have blood levels of a person half of my age. He also told me to “keep right on doing what you’re doing.”

I was so pleased to be informed of this that I went home and opened a beer.

I know I’ve shared this before but 20 years ago I weighed over 100 pounds more than I do now. I was a cigarette smoker and drank like a goddamn fish. My daily diet was fucking atrocious and my health just sucked in general. I was frequently sick, I damaged my already shitty knees with the extra weight and I was just not very goddamn happy.

Now? I weigh 100 pounds less and I don’t smoke cigarettes any more!

I drink a little less too.

A little.

The biggest changes were my daily diet and daily exercise. The Sunday Gravy element plays a big part too. One thing I learned is that you can’t eliminate all of the unhealthy habits or you have nothing left to look forward to. That’s why I have a really lean weekday diet, I’m pretty careful on Saturdays but I leave Sunday to have whatever the fuck I want.

It’s worked for me.

Today we’re going to try the best of both worlds. We will be grilling some fairly healthy lemon, garlic chicken that’s been marinated in a white wine, rosemary marinade. I also added a quick spinach salad and we get to throw all of those healthy elements right down the shitter by adding in an insanely rich and awesome side dish.

We can have it all!

Let’s get after this.

Grilled lemon, garlic chicken.

There are your ingredients.

Chicken – I used about 5 boneless skinless chicken breasts that I cut in half.

1/3 cup of white wine. That’s a really nice pinot grigio there.

1/3 cup of extra virgin olive oil.

6-7 cloves of garlic – minced.

Juice and zest of 1 fresh lemon – yes, there are 2 lemons in the photo but I only used 1.

Some sprigs of fresh rosemary.

The rosemary came from…

My herb garden. Spoiler! Those chives are gonna get some use too.

Take the chicken and place in the by now all-too-familiar 1 gallon zip top bag. Mix together the rest of the ingredients like so.

Pour the marinade over the chicken. Zip up the baggie and place in the refrigerator.

This can marinate anywhere from 4 hours to a couple of days in the refrigerator. I let mine go overnight.

You could cook this for 35 minutes in a 350 degree oven if you wanted but fuck that.

Summer. Heat. Humidity. That type of shit?

RIGHT!

Grill this on a charcoal fire for about 6-7 minutes per side.

Today we will also be using a flavored olive oil.

This is simply three tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil and about a teaspoon of chopped rosemary. I made this the day before to get the oil nice and seasoned. This is used as a basting sauce for the chicken. Grill, baste, repeat.

You may have noticed this grilling configuration before, with the chicken cut in half. There are a couple of good reasons for this. The first reason is cutting the chicken breasts exposes more surface area for marinade interaction. The meat gets a bit more flavorful this way. Another reason is it’s easier to grill. You can move the pieces of chicken around on the grill a little easier this way. Finally it is much more efficient to ensure proper done-ness this way. By exposing more cooking area you reduce the risk of having perfectly grilled exterior on the chicken with the possibility of under cooking the center.

E-Coli is bad MM-Kay!

You could simply serve this delicious chicken with the spinach salad, have a nice glass of white wine, maybe the rest of that pinot grigio up there, and you could feel great about preparing a very tasty and healthy dinner!

Good for you!

Or?

You could make a side dish that is so rich, decadent, utterly unhealthy yet so insanely fucking delicious that you can throw all of the good you’ve accomplished right out the goddamn window!

Let’s do that!

The inspiration for this dish came from some, just being honest here, authentic store-bought shit!

Are you familiar with “the Ronis?”

And its close cousin?

That one right there! The Pasta Roni Parmesan thing. True confession time: I’ve used that box A LOT in the past. It’s cheap as shit, easy as hell and tastier than fuck to make. It also goes really well with grilled meats. I will also say it is probably healthier than what we are making today and I guaran-goddamn-tee you it is cheaper than today’s dish.

Fuck that! We’re going from scratch!

Angel hair pasta with garlic parmesan cream sauce!

Procure some angel hair pasta and use about half of the package – sorry! No homemade pasta today.

1 1/2 cups of heavy cream.

3/4 cup of freshly grated parmesan – Of course I used parmigiano reggiano.

Half a stick of butter. Oh yeah.

4 cloves of garlic minced.

1/4 teaspoon of NUTMEG!

Some fresh chives – chopped.

Salt and pepper to taste.

1 extra hour on the treadmill.

Get them noodles into a pot of boiling water.

And cook till al dente – about 4 minutes. Drain the noodles and set aside.

Grate up your fresh parmesan and chop up the chives.

Take out a medium size sauce pan or stock pot and add in the butter. Over a medium-medium low heat melt the butter down, then add in the heavy cream. Did you just have a minor heart palpitation? You’ll be fine. My doctor said so.

After a couple of minutes, add in the grated cheese and stir until bubbly.

Next add in the garlic, and the nutmeg. Give it a taste and add in the salt and pepper.

A quick note here: this is going to be really fucking tasty and you may think it’s perfectly seasoned already so why add in the extra salt? Because we are going to be dumping a big ol’ bunch of unseasoned pasta into this pot and it will dilute the flavors. If you want to err on the side of caution add the salt after cooking. Get that cooked pasta into the pot and place a handful of the chopped chives over the top.

Oh Jesus is this stuff good. Holy Hell! You will be tempted to just grab a spoon and go to town. Gobbling down big spoonfuls while you just lean over the pot while standing in the kitchen looking at the clock on the stove.

I’m not going to judge here but just this once serve it alongside the chicken and the spinach salad.

As should be obvious this shouldn’t be an everyday side dish. Even if you can afford to make this shit daily it just wouldn’t be a good idea. Every once in awhile though?

Damn right!

Let’s go ahead and plate this stuff up.

That? That’s some perfect fucking harmony right there. The chicken has a garlicky thing going with the undercurrent of lemon. The charcoal grilling gives it the requisite smokiness. The spinach salad – baby spinach, julienned carrot, almond slivers, dried cherries and blue cheese with a white vinaigrette. It’s from a premixed bag. So sue me I made the rest from scratch! Besides this time store bought is definitely cheaper than mixing this on your own – gives a depth and lightness. The tang of the blue cheese is spot on.

That pasta dish though? Rich, creamy, cheesy, garlicky damn goodness.

Can a side dish be a star?

MAYBE!

That is one satisfying meal. If you have leftover chicken it can be used in a number of applications.

There will probably NOT be any leftover parmesan pasta.

I appreciate you reading along folks. Just a few more weeks until football season is real!

Remember to eat healthy when possible, exercise as much as you can, visit your doctor at least once a year and then you can occasionally indulge in the good stuff once in awhile. Life’s too goddamn short.

Thanks for being there.

PEACE!