Meh. It’s sunny and warm here. TO THE GAMES!
Brownies/Saints:
He gone. Rumour has it Josh Gordon showed up to the Browns practice facility and was “not himself”. High. He was high. Funny thing, when I started doing these game intros I was told there would be no meth. smh.
Bolts/Bills:
Last week Buffalo was Nathan Peterman’s team. After the D gave up 369 yardos the brain trust decided that it should be Josh Allen’s team. Last week’s “I don’t think Allen is ready yet” morphed into “Gentlemen, after very careful consideration, I’ve come to the conclusion that Josh Allen is ready-ish”.
Chefs/Stillers:
Both Pittsburgh corners are banged up and that’s not going to cut it vs. Mahomes & Co’s vertical, mid-field and short passing game. More bad news? Steelers defenders were flummoxed by Tire Rod’s jaunts out of the pocket last week and they meet up with another qb with the same ability to scramble.
Colts/’Dacteds:
The Architect didn’t exactly baby his arm last week after nearly 2 full years on the sideline. He completed 39 passes at a 74% rate for 300 yards. T.Y. Hilton looks forward to being fantasy-relevant again. (not really, he’s probably happy to have a competent signal-caller under center)
Fins/Jests:
Key to success for them Jerts? Keep Fanny Hill in 3rd and long sitchamucations-the only qb with worse numbers goes by the name of Bortles. Tons of interceptions? YES. I don’t throw around the word ‘retard’ very easily but I think the Jets long bout with irrelevance will be slightly retarded this year.
Iggles/Bucs:
The TB O that tossed 48 points onto the scoreboard last week vs. the Saints might just give Philly a bit of a headache. DeSean looks as though he’ll play which will open the field up for the likes of wr’s Evans and Godwin, te Howard and rb Barber. Looks as though Wentz is about two weeks away.
Panthers/Falcons:
Both teams are banged up as hell with the advantage going to Atlanta because they’ve got Tevin “No, it’s not Kevin, dammit!” Coleman starting in place of DeVonta. In this spot he usually gets 18-20 carries on top of his 6-7 targets in the passing game. He’s also good for a TD average-wise. Start that fella and don’t look back.
Texans/Titans:
Coach Vrabel said that both qb’s were going to play today. Huh? That shit never works. Thing is, no matter who is throwing the ball, they should have a great time against a Texans secondary that is signing kids off the street due to numerous injury issues.
Vikes/Pack:
The spinning eyeballs, the clipped speech-Rodgers post-game interview was one for the ages last week. He’s listed as questionable. Wait. Nope. He’s starting. Maybe. If he is this will be one hell of a game for the second week of the season.
Today’s games look good. You can make them even better by being your funny selves. Do it.
Ajayi not dead!
Wha? He’s back on the field?
Just socred even
I didn’t need that badly at all. Woooooooooo!!!
2yd TD!
Chefs must have taken some tackling lessons during halftime.
So if the Eagles do the big comeback here, do we get that awesome thing where the Bucs resurgence dies immediately?
You know, when the commentator says ‘throwing darts’ to mean accurate, they haven’t seen a lot of my friends throw darts
I endorse “Like a drunk throwing darts” as a new way to describe QB inaccuracy.
Did they say they were accurately thrown darts?
Have you or anyone here ever played Dartball?
THEY OVERTURNED THE CALL! ITS A PAPUA NEW GUINEA INDEPENDENCE DAY MIRACLE!!!!!
The replay official told them to dial it back a bit as they were being too obvious.
The refs, much like Jeff Sessions, doing the minimum to maintain a semblance of credibility
You know it sad when Sessions is consider the Voice of Reason.
For Sessions, he maintains the minimum so he can keep screwing people over and prevent justice reform. Not convinced the refs aren’t doing the same.
That’s what I mean. He’s a piece of crap but in the toilet bowl of that administraion, he’s floats to the top.
For some reason, MGK is being talked about all over Twitter. The only thing I know about him is that this happened.
tannehill the never ending derpy
If I’m the Chiefs owner, if the refs uphold this call, I walk my team off the field. You can win if the refs are on the payroll.
RedZone didn’t even show the overturn!
This Jets-Dolphins game is an exercise in football futility.
Romo doing shitty Corona commercials…..is kinda perfect
Even BLEERGH thinks the refs are taking this game too far.
If this Chiefs TD is overturned, Imma stop watching, no point
This crew should be investigated
it’s blatant
Clear TD but you know its the Steelers.
THREE feet in, now Fat Andy has to burn a challenge
Run it in Mahomes!
What is the least number of injuries that someone has had in a 3+ year NFL career in the SB era?
Starting the majority of that time, and not a punter or kicker
dacteds thinking a FGkkake will win them a game
Football Purists.
The 2002 Sacramento Kings have seen this before-they’re betting on the Steelers.
The 2005 Seattle Seahawks are betting the house.
Nice play Viks. Now Kill Rodgers. You get to to keep Rodgers leg as a War Trophy.
Yes!
Oh, look, it’s LeSean McCoy on the ground writhing in pain. What a shame.
There’s an alternate universe where the refs made the correct call on both those scoring plays and the score is 28-14
Yes, but in that world the refs got control of that Wild Card game and the Bengals won because Bernard wasn’t killed in the 3rd Qtr. You want to live in that world?
Shady ded?
Chris “what, me catch?” Herndon is the only thing stopping this from being a tied game.
Final season of Big Bang. First year of Magnum P.I. Everything is okay in the world is okay again.
It’s a remake of Magnum. So not quite.
Alex Smith gonna use up all his 5+ yard passes in this game, it seems.
Yinzburgh is a public team, plus now they are taking a strong, publicly anti-labour stand. The Shield all in.
A team named after millworkers which incorporates the logo of that industry has come out publically against labor. Fascinating.
indeed, I noticed teh irony as well
Carnegie and Morgan were all in with the government. Hell, they financed McKinley’s campaigns.
3 ppls in my Survivor took N’Awlins, oops
I think I took Eagles. On the bright side, its one less thing for me to worry about Wednesday night.
Conner isn’t in.
When did the refs get so in bed with Rapey?
They’ve been in bed for years. You guys didn’t notice because of your complete and undying hatred for the Pats.
Review Booth alot like a stall
The Steelers and refs have been BFFs for a very long time. Ask Cincy and Browns fans.
With benefits, Spur. With benefits.
It’s only natural that they’d be friendly with a team that constantly reminds everyone of the importance of referees.
that ball was NOT across when elbow went down, guarantee they let it stand
We thinking alike again
NO TD FOR YOU. I don’t even hate the Steelers, I’m pretty okay with them, but KC has played better and this score is BS
I just went to the store for my ill mother. What happened in Pittsburgh?
refs and andy reid
More layoffs.
Kordell Stewart gave a powerful speech in the 2nd Quarter and the refs.
HAH! If that flag rever…FUCK THE REFS
Boy howdy are the zeebs bailing out Yinzburgh.
That’s a legit call though.
Refs are all-in on the Steelers.
Hippo called it. Shit, the refs handed them a Supe.
Steelers all doing the L. Bell first down ball drop.
Andy Luck looks really, really bad y’all
Irsay musta broke his coke mirror and sentenced the Cokts to years of bad luck
Rapey really not looking that good, kinda Elishaish but without the childlike wonder
It seems that this year I am the Hue Jackson of fantasy football.
You would destroy me
RTD grows red with anger….
better than the sean mcdermott of ff
Luck wanting to be picked off again
DJax with the annual “Fuck Chip Kelly” reminder
There’s way more than one of those per year
In the old nfl, Doctson gets a TD there.
The Steelers will be SOL if Jujubee goes out
I know it’s against the ‘dacteds but indy playing actual defense for the first time since 2006
Easy when you don’t have to play 5 yards past scrimmage
Somewhere Bob Sanders just twisted his ankle.
and asploded his knees
Man, Mahomes looks 4 Real.
Bad FF week to face Mahomes + Hill.
The Blunder Years starring Kevin darnold
♪ What would you do if my pass overthrew? / Would you stand up and walk out on me? ♪
Shouldn’t that be a Safety Dance?
no, because a muff means no possession in positive territory
LOLJETS
LOLPHINS
Redactedception at the Humps 29. If they can’t score off of this…hell, it woke up Sonny on Redacteds Radio.