JV NFL – Week 4 Doldrums

King Hippo

King Hippo

Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan.Also a proud fookin’ Evertonian.Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child.[Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
King Hippo

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Every September, there is a weekly slate of games that is just refried ass.  Welcome to said Saturday.

Georgia at Missouri (Noon, ESPN)

Both of these teams are undefeated, but only one is any good, and maybe not even one (thus the slight opportunity for a trap game).

Notre Dame at Wake Forest (Noon, ABC)

The Irish’ tour of various Sisters of the Poor continues in Winston-Salem this week.  Another unimpressive win by less than a TD?  Probably.

Texas A&M at Alabama (3:30, CBS)

Those glasses that Jimbo wears to make himself look less stupid?  Ain’t gonna help today.  CBS finally abandons UT/FL in its traditional slot, and it’s for this flaming bag of shit.

Clemson at Georgia Tech (3:30, ABC)

Hey looky-loo, a legitimate trap game!  The Bees have been bad, but they can score (in a way your dead great grandpappy would approve of, except for all the blacks), and Son of Clem has a tendency to get flustered down Atlanta way.  As always, I will be hoping that Dabo! dies.

South Cakalaky at Vanderbilt (4:00, SECN)

When in doubt, watch Vandy for the yuk-yuks.  Today is that kind of day.

TCU at Texas (4:30, Fox)

Perhaps the only fixture of the day that I am legitimately looking forward to.  Will Bloodeyes be all emotionally let down after shitting themselves against tOSU?  Or will they be out for steer blood?  Let’s hope for the latter, but I very much fear the former.

Mississippi State at Kentucky (7:00, ESPN2)

This’un is fairly interesting, too, with Kenfucky returning home heroes after breaking a 31 (or was it 32?) game losing streak in the series – dating back to Tim Fucking Couch – in Gainesville.  Note to Big Blue – don’t be all reveling, because Cowbells are most definitely NAWT a perpetually overrated SEC East side.

Texas Tech at Oklahoma State (7:00, FS1)

You want points?  Weird fetishes?  Oh, does Guns Up!! and the BDSM State locals have a treat in store for y’all.

Stanford at Oregon (8:00, ABC)

Seriously, this is where the GameDay crew went.  Does anybody really goddamned care about this?  Is Oh-ray-GAWNE even ranked?  /looks it up, they’s #20

Arizona State at Washington (10:30, ESPN)

Yet again, your tweaker fixture involves Herm Edwards.  Draw your own conclusions.  Also, 17.5 is WAY too big a spread here, as U-Dub isn’t much account neither, especially on offense.

King Hippo
King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Moose -The End Is Well NighscotchnautRedshirtherodotus450King Hippo Recent comment authors
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scotchnaut

Sitting in the sun while watching a bonfire has made me more red-faced than Daniel Snyder’s favourite Halloween costume.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Redshirt

We got a Pitch Invasion at Old Dominion!

herodotus450
herodotus450

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Redshirt

Old Dominion is just running up the score. Not complaining or chastising. Just updating everyone.

scotchnaut

Miss. St. and Kentucky teams had a wee altercation and pre-game audio picked up a few things.

Fuck You! I’m more racist than you are!

Watch out! We’re coming after your adult literacy rates!

Rural poverty? I’ll show you rural fuckin’ poverty!

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, that was funny.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Vtech learning the hard way that you DO NOT want to play AT ODU’s Fearsome Foreman Field.

yeah right

The play by play dude calling the Texas/TCU game is the guy the Dodgers replaced Vin Scully with. His sibilants drive me fucking nuts.
“That makes the score 3-2 Dodgershh.”

Finish your fucking words properly butthole!

theeWeeBabySeamus

I like Will Grier. I’m seriously very happy he didn’t fuck us in the ass last week.

Thank you, Florence.

scotchnaut

He was the best. I miss him.

herodotus450
herodotus450

How do I sign up to be a farmer?
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yeah right

Great God almighty Dean Blandino is a raging fucking TOOL!

scotchnaut

I don’t care what the score says-Florida International is the damn airport football team I’ve seen in quite some time.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I am the proud owner of an FIU baseball t-shirt Sir!!!!!!
(Friend was a catcher there)
((shirt is kinda falling apart at this point))

Redshirt

VT is starting to implode.

herodotus450
herodotus450

You can take the Vicks out of Vtech but you can’t take the Vtech… wait.

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m curious about how Apple Pan went…

herodotus450
herodotus450

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Twas tasty. Like a counter style In-N-Out burger. People were really friendly.

WCS

Alright, I have to go pick up a new coffee table. See yinz later for the Fightin’ Herm Edwardses.

scotchnaut

I’m sure it’ll still be at the end of that driveway tomorrow morning…

WCS

2nd and 30? NFL BLITZ!

scotchnaut

Every time I think I’m old I just remember that Bill Snyder graduated high school before I was born and I don’t feel so bad.

WCS

Bill Snyder graduated high school during the James K. Polk administration.

litre_cola

The problem with North Dakota all started when they changed their names from the Fighting Sioux to the Fighting Hawks.

WCS

Penn beat Lehigh! Everything’s coming up Milhouse!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is it time to take a nap?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Yes it is.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I love that banner quote.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s a good one.

scotchnaut

I just spent more than four hours burning stuff and answering trivia questions. Best day I’ve had in a long time.

/just so you know, the step-mother’s house was on fire before I got there.

WCS

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Wakezilla

It’s true. You were with me!

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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herodotus450
herodotus450

Virgina Tech all tied up with the Old Dominion Monarchs
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Unsurprised
Unsurprised
WCS

Something’s up now, that’s for sure.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Jeebus, KState is holding like crazy and still can’t stop them.

scotchnaut

Just got in-what game are we hate-watching?

herodotus450
herodotus450

Alabama? Always Alabama.
/Only game I’m not watching

scotchnaut

I guess I’ll give TCU a gander.

Redshirt

#13 VT and Old Dominion are tied at 21.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Maybe Kstate should cover shis Sills guy. Or double cover. Or eleventycover.

WCS

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Do you need to change your shorts yet?

WCS

No, but Lil’ WCS does.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hahahaha

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yep, he stepped out just barely.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m sure glad we didn’t lose to WVU last week.
😛

(seriously folks, this could end up being your nat’l champs)

WCS

Redshirt

I’m okay with player faking injuries to stop no huddle offensives, just so long as they don’t make it obvious.

(falls down into fetal position) “OH MY GOD! I’M DYING! THE PAIN! THE PAIN!”
(trainer helps him up)
(skipping back to his sideline) ♫ “LA LA-LA LA-LA” ♫

WCS

Learning from their European counterparts.