Your “Stayin’ Alive, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Stayin’ Alive” Monday Night Football Open Thread

Week 15 Fallout:

These are the teams that were officially sent to a farm upstate. They are the Bills, Jets, Broncos, Bengals, Giants, Packers, Lions, Bucs and Falcons. No need to worry about them though, at this particular farm the refs have a very firm grasp on the ‘catch’ rule and have explained it to every player and coach. In addition, every game is a home game. No travelling! And meeting all the teams at the farm gate? Why, the one and only Colin Kaepernik! I’m sure the bidding war for his services will be quite the spectacle!

In other news-Gore Gone. For the rest of the year. Don’t even let the idea of his career being over escape your lips. I sure as heck am not going to commit to writing him off like I did last year and the year before that. Just a thought-a very smart organization would hire him as a player-coach next year. Should this occur I know for sure that he won’t be mentoring [spins the wheel] “Joe Mixon”.

Derrick Henry remains the biggest bastard man ever. Like, ever.

Eli is worse than you think he is. Also worse? The Giants other options at the QB spot.

Kenny Golladay went for 146 yards on 7 receptions. Yeah, he traversed nearly a football field and a half in a game where the winner scored 14 points and it wasn’t the Lions. smgdh.

I’ve called this a ‘passing league’. You’ve called this a ‘passing league’. I’ll just mention the rb’s that ran for a 100 yards or more this week. Here goes-Somebody Samuels, Kit Carson, “Gus” Edwards, Bastard Man Henry, Dalvinci Cook, Merlin Mack, “Tricky Dick” Mixon, Television Coleman, Nickolai Chubbovsky and Kato Ballage. I’m sure that there were more total tight ends and wr’s that ended up over that arbitrary number but you get my point, right? [wonders what his point was]

TO THE GAME!

Saints/Panthers:

Oh boy, I’ve waited all week to talk about this game! I don’t even know where to start! [presses listening device to ear] What’s that? The intro is over the 250 word minimum? Okay, then. See Ya!

“If you take out the ‘e’ away from Gore Gone, you’ll get something else entirely.”

-Perseus