Let’s dig in right away shall we? I’m running late.
TO THE GAMES!
Bengalis/Brownies:
Cincy is without both wr’s Green and Boyd so if you’ve got notion to go in motion with Mixon, follow it through. Also, Cleveland have dramatically increased their Chubb usage (a bit too late, but whatever) so he’s a lovely play given that he tore the Bengalis a few new holes last time they played.
Buckos/Boys:
Go Tampa Bay! That’s probably the only time I’ve uttered those three words. Huh…
Vikes/Leonidas:
Striking a victory for fake history, I’m betting that Leif and his Lucky Bunch push the Maned Ones down the Well of Lost Seasons.
Giant Putzes/Horsemen:
Indy’s sackage percentages have gone through the roof lately and look, over there-it’s a wobbly old guy that has no lateral movement whatsoever! It was nice knowing Eli.*
*sentiment valid from 2007-2011 only
Crying Jags/No Porpoise:
I’m supposed to comment on this game? I’m going to have my lawyer pore over the details in my non-existent contract.
Overdue Bills/Rules Molesters:
It’s about time that we get to revel in the end of the line for Brady. Perhaps a heavy dose of Jerry Hughes and Company can hasten that inevitability? Asking for a friend, er, the universe.
Cheesemongers/Canceled Flights:
Winners get pizza, losers get mocked until Homer’s throat is sore.
Redundancies/SB Hangovers:
Not only do I not care about this game, I… Actually, I’ll just leave it at that.
The Undefensibles/Newton’s Void:
So much to not choose from here…
Good luck to those that are still fantasizing.
Jets are up 7-0. I fully expect this score to last and can reliably stop watching, secure in their chances for victory. Haha, no. They will now surrender 28 unanswered points.
Fathumps took the day off?
yooooo manning+ the giants looking good early!!!!!!!!
weird flex, but ok.
Crap, fell asleep for an hour waiting for the games to start.
hahaha yES!!!!!!!! julioJONES with the TD and fournette with the TD!!!!!
your GAMBLOR(s) paid off!
HORNY FOURNY!
DAK DAK DAK DAK DAK!
Shit, now I want ham.
/gurgling sounds of disapproval from Non-Gendered Cowpersons’ sideline
SONYPLAYSTATIONDOWN
Yes!!!!!
Haha, Legohead, I see you, flirting with competency, but you dont fool me!
Every time I think Dak is getting worse by the game, he throws a pass like the one he just threw to Gallup.
That said, Dak is getting worse by the game.
The Cowboys are going to get relegated.
They have more wins than Fulham has goals.*
*May or may not be true.
A defense expecting screen passes from the Cowboys?
The hell you say!
Man, imagine the season Roberts would be having if there wasn’t a penalty on every goddam return
TINYDARRENDOWN!
Today’s shirt. Wife’s family coming over in a few hours. Will be feeding 15 or so. And prob not drinking as there’s an alcoholic trying to stay dry and thus were trying not to add to that pressure
All of our plans to either have guests for or family with us for Christmas, have fallen through so it will just be the wife and I for the next 3 days. I think this will be the best Christmas since I turned 21.
Noooooice. Tho I do like havin people around over the holidays
Saquon good y’all
Crawford is moving his hands and feet, so that’s cool. I guess.
Every time I hear them say Heinickie’s name I feel like I need to have the exhaust system of my car inspected.
alright really need Fournette to show up and do the damn thing!!!!!!
https://sports.theonion.com/nfl-defends-right-to-subject-eric-reid-to-random-stop-a-1831268180?utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_campaign=SF&utm_content=Main&utm_source=Twitter
Yo.
Turned on the Cowboy game to see someone being taken off the field and possibly paralyzed.
Seriously, fuck this.
Fuck. I keep forgetting to swap Jason Myers… wait he shanked it, never mind.
Nyello
Afternoon all.
Sensitive injury music 57 seconds into the game.
who ded?
Some ‘Boy. At commercial, so not yet sure if ded.
Tyrone Crawford, ded enough for cart action, everybody looking very worried indeed
Yeah, he ain’t moving. Even the TB players look concerned. And given what they’ve seen in their locker room, you know it’s serious.
Go 500s, Saints, and Non-Gendered Cowpersons!
Boo this man.
Afternoon, degenerates.
Is this the Festivus open thread?
oh, grievances SHALL be aired!
/hey looky-loo, I got my odds up from 31% to mid-40s!
//in money league, I am rolling the dice on Gurley Man too
So instead of buying screen cleaning wipes for my cell phone, I decided to buy a new cell phone cover that doesn’t say Bengals on it.
The Bengals suck so much, I paid $50 so my phone wouldn’t be associated with them.
But you’ll still help me cheer Beatie to 3 scores today, right??
Of course. Unlike my phone, I have no honor or self-respect to lose.
One of us! One of us!!
Made another 2 bills on 10-man Sevilla’s late equalizer.
/$1500 MOAR had they gotten a 2nd…
Girl I met for the first time last night: “I have to stay hydrated.”
Me: “Yeah…that’s important.”
Girl: “I have Crohn’s.”
Never allowing the ladies family in my house again.
Oh crap, that reminds me-Game of Crohn’s is streaming on IBD right now!
I’d bet against, hear they are a bit loose at the back…
love ya xmas ape!
https://twitter.com/xmasape/status/1075774931701383174
heresy – n.
Cowboys need to trade for Mariota now.
Rain is falling today “like a double-cunted cow pissing on a flat rock,” as one old flight engineer I knew used to say. I have no bets to make, no favorites to play. A gambler I am not… not that there’s anything wrong with that. I am going to the tavern soon to watch the soft, gooey cheese cover the airport, because I feel like watching dull ineptitude and violent malaise in the company of strangers and with a perpetual beer in front of me. There was a chance of my being productive today, for a while there, but the weather has me seeking shelter in alcohol and bad football.
Blame it on the rain.
9/10 resignation. Would bang (beer steins)
fuckety fuck fuck
Only bet in the 1p window is $50 on Non-Gendered Cowpersons to win the first half by more than 5.5 (I adjusted the line up a point for better odds, 5 at the half is unusual)
Now Hippo has a sad.
as a comfort, I do have moneys on a Draw, and 2-2 specifically
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSbgxcCoOy8
I don’t have to care until the Bears game at 4pm eastern, right?
Folks
HIPPO HAS A HAPPY!!!
then indignation as the 2nd is disallowed
/made 2 bills betting Wolfsburg late, at least
I have to go to the beer store in 41 minutes.
I plan to get blackout drunk and watch Christmas shows all day and maybe also yell at some football in between.
Maybe.
Yay.
We like Krysten.
I would LOVE to shoot heroine with her…
Go? Tampa Bay!
Also, that bar association logo shouldn’t be there.
I had a sequence of dreams about drinking to excess with my fellow Star Trek and proles, capped off with a trip to Ireland (where I don’t think Gritty will have the drawing power he does here on account of being a hairy orange bastard), and I’m sure all of that is perfectly normal and healthy,
Just bet the Seinfeld/Costanza for the Iggles.
Phi
TB
KC
DET
and
Hou
Dal
Sea
Minny
Something has to give!
I’ll be feeding fifteen people this afternoon. Better get some cookin’ music on. AND KEEP STIRRING THAT SAUCE!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=era7iVv2WPE
That’s the spirit!
Loves the new team names.
No Porpoise just slayed me. That’s good wordplay hustle!
Also, Spurs/Toffees matters. COYB!!