They (people) are saying as of the morning time that the snow’s a’falling and will taper off during the afternoon. WHO WILL THIS FAVOR? HOW? WHY? I MUST KNOW! WILL THERE BE SLUSH? WILL SOMEONE THAT DOES’NT USUALLY WEAR GLOVES BE WEARING GLOVES?
Sorry for the rampant capitalization folks-I was just preparing you for the most important screeching queries the pre-gamers will be filling air-time with. That said, ‘snow football’ is a precious treat that doesn’t come along nearly as often as it should. Anyone remember that game where no one could see the sideline or the yard markers? I do, sorta. I recall that there were two teams involved and that one of them beat the other. God, memories… [sighs]
TO THE GAME!
Young Horsies/Old Native Americans:
As far as injuries are concerned wr Sammy Watkins is expected to parka up but safety Malik Hooker (on the hook to help tamp down the influence of Tyreek) is questionable.
The delightful A. Schefter has pointed out-as have many others-that the Colts have won as many playoff tilts at Arrowhead as have the Chiefs themselves. So there might be something to my theory that the stadium was built on an old Indian’s* Pet Cemetery Scorned Woman Wrongfully-Executed Man Burial Ground. Subscribe to my blog if you want to learn more.
I am a bit concerned that if one combines the above with Andy Reid’s playoff adventures/negative clock juju, the Chiefs might have too much going against them. The Colts have scored TD’s on their first two drives in each of their last two games but then tend to settle into the running game and let the D do the lifting the rest of the game. You and I [winks] both know that a two-score lead is nothing to a fella that tossed 50 six-pointers this past regular season. The Colts OC Nick Sirianni (why is this guy not more prominently mentioned these days?) says that his #1 job is to put up points today and he’ll most likely have to do a 40-spot ’cause them KC’ers average 35 overall.
Is the laundry folded? Okay, now you can watch the game.
*forgive the outdated nomenclature but damnit, I needed it in order to make the joke work
IT BEGINS
SUDDEN CHANGE
Frank Reich really looks like a hobo. I’m sure scotchy has noticed…
Lots of Maryland alums look like hobos
Hey, there’s a bar in xinyi showing the next game at 9:15 am, woo! Also, on my food tour yesterday I met an Aussie who’s a huge 49rs fan
At a bar in Phuket I met a 69rs fan!
Xinyi sounds like an ambiguous hooker’s name
“He keeps yelling and making us think he’s going to snap it! Is that even legal?” – Colts defenders
and he’s not even saying HODOR!
https://twitter.com/bepryor/status/1084215532981809152?s=19
“If Mahomes comes back onto the field is he the grittiest kid that ever was or a hero fella that wants the glory all for himself?”
-Fox News Poll
“I mean really you gotta give all the credit to Travis Kelce…”
50/50, based on teh pre-game show ,, smgdh
Colts providing absolutely zero entertainment value here.
to be fair, they’re from indianapolis
agreed, i may put some pants on and watch the 2nd half from the bar.
You wanted entertainment from Indy and were disappointed? I’ve got a Pol Pot musical you might be interested in.
Andrew Luck completion, take a codeine
“Amateur.”
Jim I., Indianapolis, IN
3rd and 7? Time for a 6 yard route!
hedged my bet, $50 on Humps +16.5 live at -108. Could pull a double!
SMRT
also after that punt, $13 Humps ML at +1012
Is that Kareem Hunt’s mom?
Does she have a black eye? No? Then, no.
Ok, if Mahomes is broked I’m not going to mess around trying to set up a VPN on my phone so I can stream the game. Instead i’ll watch what appears to be two guys trying to teach a third, inept guy how to pole dance
He’s still in the game.
Also there are probably ways to stream it without a VPN. Cough.
Mahomes will finish and win this game, tomorrow we find out he has a tear and out for Sunday against the Pats.
There is no God.
This seems accurate.
Kinda have to agree with ya here. The brees -brady fellating shall happen!
/laughs hysterically
//devolves into continuous weeping
So it shall be written…
Well everything is shit again.
not ded.
(JR voice)
“Good God, King! That’s Chad Henne’s music!”
You can take Bernard Pollard off a team, but his spirit remains…
That would be Tom Brady though.
Bob Sanders, the eight-game pro bowler
Oh oh Chef fans. Who is the backup?
utttt ohhhhhh Mahomies hit his kneee…..
Shit Mahomes is hurt. There goes next week for sure
Mahomsey ded?
o noes
Intentional Grounding much?
Damn, Kelce played that block well on that screen. A lot of players would just run ahead and get taken down by the safety.
&f=1
What time is it in football world? I’m in Taipei and it’s 6:15 Sunday morning and I have no goddamn clue when the games are supposed to be on or if I can even watch them here
Got yourself cheap 7-11 The Beer from the airport?
Say what now? I’ve been distracted by all the boba tea
Taiwanese tv is weird
“You mean Chinese TV.”
-Hidden speaker in your hotel room
Q2, 12 and change left. Chefs up 17-nil
I wouldn’t give it to the LSU guy that much in these conditions.
Fans suck.
“Needs more snowplow.” – Ron Meyer
I kinda wish I’d have gone to see this.
Just turned it on. Is Luck hurt?
just hilariously ineffective
There’s Playoff Andy.
1st Quarter timeout, drink!
Mahomes-y is really damned good, y’all
aLeX sMiTh mAdE ThE pRo-BoWl ThReE TiMeS
So far, teams that beat the Texans in the playoffs are 1-3 in their following game. Seems like it’s going to become 1-4. The Texans are playoff poison.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YejxyaFyUHc
Does a win over a team that doesn’t exist mean anything?
or that the 500s are just a different flavour of hot garbage, each season
Reason to settle down
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Agg73-6QOYo
captain smallhands checkdown ain’t the qb anymore, tho
Ah Cris and Al going to for the “your uncle’s ‘friend’ who always comes to family events and vacations together” wardrobe.
“The thing about the Chiefs is they hit you from so many angles.” Wasn’t that when Hunt and Hill were both on the team?
Andrew Luck off to a hot start I see
Slow-mo money shot. I tried to be clever, but whatever.
smothered baby horse. Andy’s favorite.
man’s gotta have an appetizer sometimes
/deep wheezing
What else are you going to put Arby’s horsey sauce on?
Uncle Ed used to put it on prostitute’s lab… never mind
Okay, so I think we can safely say the Chiefs are slightly better than the Texans.
Ah, there’s that feeling of emotional numbness that I’ve come to know so well this season.
Hippo sharing his pills?
What’s that from?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FrOQC-zEog
John Wick looks old.
Burnt out, even?
Can Mahomes build a lead not even Andy Reid can waste it? We’ll find out.
The unstoppable force vs the immovable object.
SHEESH!!!!! chiefs rolling early
Chiefs making this look like a game of Madden on Rookie difficulty.
HAIL MUTHAFUCKIN’ GAMBLOR!!
That would have been easier without all the drops.
GO ANDY GO!!
3 consecutive shitty drops
snow game, mandatory beef moe post:
https://twitter.com/xmasape/status/948970971809157127
those dogs ROCK!!!!!!!
Gotta Czech your trunk space