Fallout:
-T.O. opened up his bridge-burner again and to no one’s surprise threw hc Garrett under the bus for having the gall to lose to a superior team. Several wanks were wanked.
-Harvey Dahl awaits his inevitable fine and perhaps a flurry of ‘random’ drug tests(?) for not expressing himself like an Anthony Hopkins in The Remains of The Day during the heat of competition.
-Aqib Talib awaits his inevitable fine and perhaps a flurry of ‘random’ drug tests for not expressing himself like Peter Sellers in Being There during the heat of celebration post-game.
-not exactly fallout but one of the linemen, Bob Kuechenberg from The ’72 Dolphins, passed away. He was one of those classy racists (like Matt Birk and Tim Thomas) that turned down a White House visit back in 2013 because a black fella happened to be running the nation at the time.
TO THE GAME!
Muscle Cars/Tea Party Throwers:
This doesn’t bode well-Rivers has never beaten Brady head-to-head in a game. However, in the man-to-man matchup in The Game of Life he’s way up 9-3. (I’m assuming Tiffany will come through with the deliverable-she’s a seasoned pro in her own right)
If you’re a history nutball like myself you’ll happen to know that the very first time these two met in a championship game (back in January of ’63) the Chargers came away with a 51-10 victory.
Sorta looks like near the end of the line for both Brady (maybe another year?) and Gronk especially after you saw the latter stumble and totter while trying to chase that Fins player during that miracle win.
It’s time for a bloody… Ceasar.
liking my P*ts -3.5 bet
Not loving the SD +4 part of my parlay at the moment
Sony Michel is a fucking STUD. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
That’s good since he’s gonna account for about 90% of their offense next year.
Yeah dont hide your excitement when the Pats score
Chargers D needs to get to Brady, but they’re always double teamed by the o-line and the threat of the refs getting involved.
Breaking Brady’s leg/arm is at the very most a 15 yard penalty and getting thrown out of the game. Where’s the goddamn downside?
For the Chargers to win, New England may have to make some mistakes.
Fuck.
Ah yes, the not tackling Edelman defense. It’s worked pretty well over the years.
well u got 2 expect him 2 b slippery ,, imo g-dbless
I don’t own a truck. I’ve never owned a truck. But even I find a tailgate having a step is just…just…wrong!
For young limber people, you are absolutely correct. As someone nearing 60 years of age, I would love to have a tailgate like that, if I was going to buy a new truck.
That’s a fake age. No one is that old.
No one is more surprised of mortified than I am.
Will THE WALL also keep out that marauding horde of truck owners carrying tailgates? Because I may have to rethink my position on that idiotic idea.
“THOUSANDS of truck owners cross the border EVERY DAY to do terrible, horrible SEXUALLY DEVIANT actions to MULES AND DONKEYS!”
They are thieves and rapists.
Donkey show is a big tourist attraction in Tijuana, Juarez, Nogales, Piedras Negras, Acuna, & Matamoros.
You’re just making words up there
Woooooo
FUCK, Gilmore! Jesus.
Jesus is pals withrivers. What did you expect?
Ah the tricky DERP TWO defense…
KEENAN MICHEAL ALLEN!!!!!
Um, Pats Secondary? You forgot something.
Shhhhh dont tell them that
It’s the ol’ “Let’s not cover Keenan Allen” gambit by Grumblelord.
“I’d-a been all over his shit.”
—Malcolm Butler
FLOOOOOAT
That was nice.
Got a lotta game to go. This game isn’t over until at least mid second quarter.
ThIs iSn’T OvEr TiLl mID SeCoNd qUarTeR.
Chargers start oh-so-predictably with a run on first down. Pats are all over it. It’s like they think that Bill doesn’t watch game film.
Rivers gonna throw a couple hospital balls after that one.
Floatception coming? Then yelling, much yelling.
I mean, probably.
And then a baby.
DropFloat instead
Encouraging start.
I accidentally made a Mobius strip of bacon
I can’t wait to hear the end of your Mobius strip bacon story! [thinks for a second] Nevermind.
I’ve read this book before
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
i’m out already
no shutout woo
My breakfast was cake and coffee. Sugar! Caffeine! PARANOIAAAAAAAA!
Careful…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WJ6FbcWYRU
Just a great tune that references their “Lola” hit. Sorta a 4th wall thingy. First in the music world?
I know Bowie referenced Major Tom a couple times subsequent to Space Oddity, but I think that Davies beat him to the punch by a couple years.
I think you’re right about Bowie.
Ashes to Ashes, for sure.
Can a team make a drive last an entire 4 quarters? Let’s find out!
A lot of false starts followed by a defensive holding, then repeat.
This first drive is why I chuckled to myself when people told me to “Watch out for the Chargers in the Playoffs!”
Some folk talk about ‘want’ versus ‘need’. Well, ‘folk’-I want the Pats to lose and I need the Pats to lose. Fuck your dichotomy.
You may want to make sure the Chargers defense is at least aligned with your want
Thems look sleepy.
Is this a soft zone or are the chargers just blowing assignments like Bibi Jones with a TE?
Everyone always told you dirt bikes were dangerous, but you didn’t listen and now here you are, trampled to death by a stampeding herd.
Yes, don’t cover Edelman. Brady would never throw to the white guy.
Ugh, my wifi sucks. My illegal stream is going to be even laggier than usual.
Of course the Patriots start by favoring a White
HAIL SEITAN
Best version of Philip Rivers:
As a lifelong Pats fan, I would like “my” team to win, otherwise I guess I wouldn’t be much of a fan. But another part of me wants a Pats win just because it will piss so many people off.
Temperature graphic, drink!
Ok Rivers you Jesus lovin baby factory, do this for your 10th and 11th child.
David De Gea putting on a fookin’ clinic
I just chubbed up a little at the thought of this possibly being Tom Brady’s last game
Again, C.J. Anderson?
THIS RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY, I CALL HIM BABY JESSICA BECAUSE HE’S GOING TO SPEND A LOT OF TIME GOING TO THE WELL
NAWT HAPPENING
When he’s gone we’ll miss him so mu…
/sorry, I couldn’t make it thru that joke
brady and gronk aint goin nowhere, they got the good shots pre-game
perhaps I shall don my #55 Chubb jersey!
Who’s the guy with two clogged arteries who just used the same coupon for two pizzas when it probably should’ve been limited to one use per order?
C.J. Anderson?
More Hippo betting opportunities.
Afternoon, folks. I am nervous as shit for this game.
/Also an obligatory FACK YOU YOU FACKIN’ FACKS WE AHH WINNING ANOTHAH ONE
Ooh, a negative score! Don’t see those very often.
Mention of Anthony Hopkins puts me in mind of one of my favorite lines of his. The Lion in Winter, as Richard (soon to be the Lionheart), having an argument with his whiny little brother John (also a future king, played by Nigel Terry), both sons of Henry II (Peter O’Toole) and Eleanor of Aquitane (Katherine Hepburn).
“John: Poor John. Who says poor John? Don’t everybody sob at once! My God, if I went up in flames there’s not a living soul who’d pee on me to put the fire out!
Richard: Let’s strike a flint and see.”
Fucking brilliant film. Crackling dialog. Highly recommended.
The Patrick Stewart / Glenn Close version is fun, but the original is still the best.
One of my all-time favorite movie moments:
Damn near every line in that is quotable. Kinda like a medieval Big Lebowski or Repo Man.
And everybody – everybody – is at the top of their acting game. God, I love that film. Need to watch it again soon.
FFS, can they stop making the Eagles play the last game of the weekend? I want to get this pain over with already.
Goooooooooo Saints! (By 8 or more)
I prefer my racists who weren’t classy
–Donald T.