Your “Happy Louis Riel/ Family/ Islander/ Nova Scotia Heritage/ Presidents Day” Open Thread

Yes,  today is all of those things!

Except in the Canadian territories because,  much like the U.S., Canada could give two shits about territories.

Apparently,  also the French-speaking province of Québec and the English-speaking province of Newfoundland and Labrador don’t get a holiday today.

Who did they piss off?

Don’t answer that.

Let’s take them one at a time,  shall we?

LOUIS RIEL DAY

Louis Riel was a, you know what? I can’t.  I cannot discuss the significance of this man, the controversies surrounding his life, and his legacy in a short Open Thread intro.

Please do yourselves a favour and do a Google search on him and read about why the province of Manitoba has declared today Louis Riel Day.

It’s a fascinating story.  It involves First Nation peoples,  the Roman Catholic Church,  real estate holdings,  corporate mischief,  the French,  royalists,  ineffectual government leaders,  exile, rebellion, and executions (plural!).  Our Canadian friends may correct me,  but I have a feeling that if you ask 5 Canadians from different parts of the country about Riel, you’ll get 5 different points of view.

Family Day

So,  apparently a bunch of provinces decided they wanted a holiday in February to coincide with the United States’ Presidents Day. Perhaps for the shopping opportunities?

They decided to create a holiday that celebrates the importance of families and family life to people and their communities. Hence,  Family Day!

I still say it’s all about the shopping.

Nova Scotia Heritage Day 

Certain provinces like Nova Scotia, however,  thought that was too crass,  commercial, and obvious,  so they decided to make the holiday about something else.

In Nova Scotia,  schoolchildren decide each year which famous Nova Scotian they want to honor each year.  This year, Heritage Day 2019 honours Maud Lewis, a world-famous folk artist. Lewis painted scenes that evoke feelings of innocence and child-like exuberance that is as enduring as the spring times she loved to paint.

Islander Day

Not to be left behind in the “I don’t want to be like the others” game,  the people of Prince Edward Island have decided to make today Islander Day.

Because fuck your family if they aren’t from Prince Edward Island.

BTW, how the fuck is Prince Edward Island a province? It’s super tiny!

I’m calling it the Rhode Island of Canadia. There is no reason I can see why those entitled pricks get to be a province while Yukon, Nunavut, and the Northwest Territory are not.  Tell me I’m wrong.

Presidents Day

Finally,  the stupid holiday that brought this whole holiday expansion in the first place: Presidents Day.

Presidents Day is bullshit because there used to be two holidays: George Washington’s Birthday and Abraham Lincoln’s Birthday.  Each was celebrated separately and some states gave both days off.

However,  the good ole American work ethic of screwing over employees took hold and changed things so only one day was taken and it combined both Presidents.

The problem is that now people think this holiday honours ALL Presidents and there are too many idiot presidents (from all parties) for them to be honoured alongside George and Abe.

If anyone tells you this holiday celebrates anyone OTHER than George Washington or Abraham Lincoln,  please give them a swift kick in the nuts or ovaries.

***

To wrap up,  let us remember the reason for the season as we get 25 percent off our favourite dildos, cock rings, and vibrators!

Which ones did YOU buy today? Tell us in the comments!

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ballsofsteelandfury

ballsofsteelandfury

International Member of the Geelong Cats and recovering Steelers fan. Likes Butts. And Balls. And Boobs. Pretty much anything that starts with the letter B. Preferably together.
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BrettFavresColonoscopyyeah rightballsofsteelandfuryFronkenshteenCol. Duke LaCross Recent comment authors
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yeah right

Movie day today. Saw Arctic. Absolutely worth seeing. Good film.
Wear a jacket because just watching it you’ll freeze your ass off.

Fronkenshteen

Inauguration Day 2021: is Donald Trump in prison, back in Trump Tower, or being sworn in for his second term?

Fronkenshteen

Our drive to my son’s basketball games takes @ half an hour. When he hopped in the car, he said, “I’m gonna get TWO baskets today!” So I told him, “OK, you just imagine that happening. Over and over. Just see yourself scoring those two baskets. Plan how you’ll do it, and it’ll happen.”
He put his music on the car stereo and turned away. He was doing it! Like a little human Bad Brains record. He had that positive mental attitude going on. And he did it! Scored two field goals, He looked for me, too, and did I disappoint?! HELL NO!! He’d already asked me to not cheer too loud, but I stood up in the back row of the bleachers with my arms straight up like a demented pterodactyl, and met his smile with a beaming, BEAMING dad smile, and let him get on with it. He put together a nice little triple-single. I think I did a good parenting!

yeah right

Outstanding. Moments like this make the grueling job of parenting pay off.

Fronkenshteen

The machine seems to be seeding the ground for a military intervention in Venezuela. People seem to be suffering horribly there. Are we going to be in the right here (he asked, expecting the answer “no”)?

Fronkenshteen

Word.

SonOfSpam

Nova Scotia? Why the fuck would anyone want a NEW Scotland?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ay. The ole one is perfect.

Col. Duke LaCross

I prepared Yeah Right’s Chicken Ala King for dinner tonight. Goddamn fantastic. Thanks for the throwback to my childhood pal!

WCS

I can’t recall if yeah right was in the military (I want to think he was), but I’m waiting for his take on SOS, better known as Shit on a Shingle, aka creamed chipped beef. That’ll take me back to my childhood, and somewhat younger-than-now years.

SonOfSpam

Aw, he hate me. Oh wait…different SOS.

WCS

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Col. Duke LaCross

Your best in show, Howard The Dog! He’s part dauschund, part bloodhound and the rest, god knows what!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I thought Howard was a duck.

Col. Duke LaCross
litre_cola
Sharkbait

What is the bad choice? Bad trigger discipline or living in Texas?

WCS

Yes.

Seriously, what the hell was this moron not thinking? Was trying to be Murphy being JT Laser?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

It just won’t stop raining here, and it’s a good thing. Caught this on my way home from work.
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SonOfSpam

Remember: A rainbow means God’s having gay sex.

litre_cola

Going to a french school in Manitoba Louis RIel was revered.

Redshirt

Watching History Channel’s “Presidents at War”. I definitely have a bit more respect for George H.W. Bush than I did before.

rockingdog
rockingdog

found a funny:
me: (counting on my fingers)

bouncer: i just asked how old you are

me: can you shut the fuck up for a second

Senor Weaselo

Budget crunch from President Trump? Good ol’ Simpsons.

rockingdog
rockingdog

cooL!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Airplane! was a near shot-for-shot remake of 1957’s ZeroHour!

Col. Duke LaCross

Theodore the albino-Maltese mix looks like a vampire.

I need this rescue dog show in my life so I can forget what a shitscape this country is turning into.

blaxabbath

i’d like to see the American president murdered.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

No you don’t. First, it’s murder and that’s awful. Second, he’d become a martyr and get a big memorial on The Mall in Washington. No, what you want is an incumbent president to lose his re-election bid, which is the definition of A LOSER.

Senor Weaselo

538-0 is not a big enough loss. Can he get negative electoral votes?

Sharkbait

Losing on a national level is the worst case scenario for his ego

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I’d settle for a pulmonary embolism created by a chunk of Quarter Pounder lodging in one of his heart valves (not sure of the medical probability or possibility of such an occurrence, am geologist not physician) while he’s sitting on the crapper tweeting at 5 AM. He could have a “Castle of Arrrrrrgh” moment with his last tweet.

Sharkbait

What is the quote? “I’ve never wished death upon any man, but I’ve happy read many obituaries.” ?

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m having some personal difficulties.
I’m angry. Very angry, for having bounced up and down the east coast for (the apparently no longer) tWLS. Fixing things for her. Then being told I was only making things worse? And being called an asshole not once, not twice…but three times.
She’s not a bad girl….but holy shit, why does my timing with lady types always have to be so bad?????

theeWeeBabySeamus

I even offered to drive back to Florida after I got my legal stuff in NC situated, so we could get her stuff taken care of, and talk about our stuff and try to fix it.

The response I got?

“No Thank You”

theeWeeBabySeamus

I hate to be petty, but I hope every time she goes back to the house in MD and sees the repairs I did, I hope she realizes how badly she fucked this up.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yes, I’m really pissed off.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

My old man has been telling me for almost 50 years, if they didn’t have a pussy there’d be a bounty on them.

Game Time Decision

I’m Hoping that you both just need some time to yourselves and you can talk whatever it is out in a few days

Game Time Decision

If family day is all about the shopping, then why is everything closed today?
/bought popcorn at the movies

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I used to get President’s Day off. Stupid buy out…
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Senor Weaselo

That was just on!