Your “Put Out To Pasture” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

• Everyone sounds surprised that Odell Beckham Jr. showed up for Browns OTAs.
  • Freddie Kitchens ain’t care:
    • “There’s no problem with Odell not being here,” Kitchens said after the NFL Draft [in reference to team voluntary workouts]. “I’d rather him be here. He’s not here. It’s voluntary. That’s what the word voluntary means. He can decide to come or he can’t.”
      • When reached for comment, Jags executive consultant Tom Coughlin had this to say:

• Joe Flacco ain’t got time for no kids and their learnin’!
  • He said he’s still learning a new offence, so he doesn’t have time to mentor Broncos rookie QB Drew Lock:
    • “I’m not worried about developing guys or any of that. That is what it is. I hope he does it well. I don’t look at that as my job. My job is to go win football games for this football team.”

• Dion Jordan is facing a 10-game suspension for a positive Adderall test.
  • It would be his second drug-related suspension, which is why the 10-games.
    • His previous suspension was for the entire 2015 season.
    • Fun fact: under the NFL’s drug policy, Adderall is considered a PED during the season, and an abuse drug in the offseason.
  • He did have an exemption because of his ADHD, but he didn’t get the exemption renewed before he resumed taking the pills.

• The highest selected QB from the 2013 Draft class has retired.
  • Know who that was?
    • EJ Manuel, who only started 17 games in four seasons with the Bills.
  • He spent 2017 with the Raiders, and was nowhere in 2018.
    • He had been signed by the Chiefs to compete for the backup position.
  • Other QBs “of note” from that draft year? Of the 11 drafted, here’s who is still active in the league:
    • Geno Smith – by the Jets; currently with the Seahawks
    • Mike Glennon – by the Bucs; currently with the Raiders
    • Matt Barkely – by the Eagles; currently with the Bills
    • Landry Jones – by the Steelers; currently with the Raiders

Folks of a certain age will pour one out tonight for Dorf actor & Spongebob Squarepants star Tim Conway, who died today at the age of 85.

• Dorf was the stupidest goddamned thing imaginable, yet my parents found the whole deal hilarious.
  • I feel fairly certain that most people my grandparent’s age had “Dorf on Golf” on VHS. He made 8 Dorf videos in total, and they can all be found on one DVD set.
  • Sales figures from an old copy of Billboard I found estimate that he’d sold over 500,000 copies of “Dorf on Golf”, and another story notes sales of over 350,000 copies of “Dorf Goes Fishing”.
    • At $19.95 + shipping (in 1980s dollars), he didn’t seem to be hurting for cash. Celebritynetworth.com had him pegged at worth $15 million, with residuals & voice work still bringing in fresh cash.

• The voice of Barnacle Boy, he will be remembered by the post-pubescent set as a master of sketch comedy from “The Carol Burnett Show”.
  • The best two examples of which are provided below for your amusement.

Tonight’s sports:

• NHL:
  • Bruins at Hurricanes – 8:00PM | NBCSN / CBC / Sportsnet
• NBA:
  • Draft lottery – 8:30PM | ESPN / TSN
  • Trail Blazers at Warriors – 9:00PM | ESPN / TSN
• MLB:
  • Rockies at Red Sox – 7:10PM | MLBN
  • Blue Jays at Giants – 9:30PM | Sportsnet1
• NCAA:
  • College Baseball: Louisville at Indiana – 7:00PM | ESPNU
• WWE:
  • Smackdown Live (on tape-delay from London) – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360

Adam Silver doesn’t seem like the draft-rigging type. Still, it is the 35th anniversary of the Patrick Ewing draft, so if the Knicks win tonight, expect the conspiracies to start raging. So, I’ll just say “Fuck off, Barstool!” right now.