EXT. NONDESCRIPT BROWNHOUSE, PARK SLOPE – DAY
A woman in a black leather jacket carefully climbs up the front steps, swaying slightly with each step. In her left arm she carries a massive handbag. She reaches out with her right arm and extends a finger to push the doorbell, and after several attempts manages to poke it successfully.
— [door flies open] —
OLIVIA MANNING: Well hello, love.
AMY TRASK: [slurring slightly] Good night! I mean, good evening!
OLIVIA: My darling Amy, what have you been up to?
AMY: Oh, you know, just getting a head start on things for tonight.
OLIVIA: [with some distaste] I meant in life, dear. [looks her over] Though I suppose I can make an educated guess.
AMY: [pulls open her bag and withdraws a bottle] I brought wine.
OLIVIA: But of course you did. Come in, come in.
As they move inwards, the doorbell rings again and OLIVIA steps back to answer it.
— [door flies open] —
ASHLEY: [blushes, as though she is somehow surprised that a door she knocked on has opened] Oh! Good evening, Mrs. Manning.
OLIVIA: [smiles gently] How many times do I have to tell you, Ashley, I’m your mother-in-law, you can dispense with the formalities. Just call me Olivia.
AMY: [snickers] Or how about “Mom”?
OLIVIA: [glares at her] Let’s get that wine of yours opened. [reaches out and takes the bottle] Oh, a nice…unchilled Chardonnay. How delightful.
AMY: Actually, I’m ready to move on to something with a little more kick.
OLIVIA: Well, I certainly could use a martini myself at this point. Ashley, do you know how to mix one?
ASHLEY: Is a cosmopolitan a martini?
OLIVIA: No dear, it is not. A cosmopolitan is a cocktail.
ASHLEY: What about an appletini?
OLIVIA: [frowns] Didn’t you used to work in a restaurant? One of those “bar and grill” type establishments?
ASHLEY: Yes, but…oh my! [clearly flustered] All of that was so long ago! Oh, I’m so sorry! These days all I know how to do is open bottles of Budweiser! [breaks fourth wall and turns to face the camera, enunciating clearly] Budweiser is Peyton’s favorite, and mine too!
Suddenly, the door handle rattles and all three women turn towards the entryway.
— [door flies open] —
VIRGINIA McCASKEY: [grinning happily, then her smile fades] Where…?
OLIVIA: Virginia! So glad you could make it. Let me take that…fur coat…of yours.
ASHLEY: Is that…is it…snowing?
OLIVIA: In May? Don’t be daft, dear. Virginia, what’s this on your coat?
VIRGINIA: [looks at her blankly, then her eyes brighten with recognition] Oh, I’m so sorry, Marge. I must have brushed against your dogwood and got myself covered in blossoms.
ASHLEY: [aside, to AMY] Marge?
AMY: [whispers back] She thinks Olivia is Marge Schott.
VIRGINIA: Your boy really needs to do a better job of trimming them back.
ASHLEY: [quietly] “Your boy”? I hope she’s talking about Eli.
AMY: She isn’t. [steps forward and speaks up] All right, looks like everyone’s here. Now, bitches…
OLIVIA: [icily] Amy. Please watch your language, Eli is upstairs.
AMY: [sarcastically] Ooooh, sorry, forgot about those virgin ears of his. But as I was saying…it’s time for Book Club, [with exaggerated softness] bitches. Let’s get this party rolling.
—
Editor’s Note: “I thought the theme for this was going to be ‘literature’,” is what you’re probably saying. “Seems like a slam dunk,” you continue, “wasn’t that the whole point of announcing that Olivia’s book club was scheduled for the same evening as Eli’s slumber party?” And you’d be right; that’s certainly what I had planned. But as it turns out, we already did that topic. So instead today’s topic is “getting together”. Now you can be talking about “getting everyone together” or you can make it “getting yourself together”. Anything (of those two options) goes! No limit on picks for today, so go wild! I’ll get us started with one from The Doors.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=drsspDuyMaY
True Fact:
“Baby Cum Back” was Jon Benet Ramsey’s nickname on the Child Beauty Queen circuit.
That’s really terrible.
Bravissimo!
I’m not laughing at that.
/is totally laughing at that
And this was probably already posted but I’m to lazy to scroll back and check.
But if it wasn’t, we should all be ashamed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45cYwDMibGo
Lazy. Very lazy. Two Beatles songs you’ve posted too late now. LAZY.
I already admitted that.
When I show up late I don’t do well.
Ya gots to scroll thru before posting. Are ya new here?
And if Rick Astley doesn’t get him, this one will….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aU57V6VBW0
RIP Daryl Dragon.
And if Peaches and Herb didn’t piss SoS off, I guarantee this one will…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPYZpwSpKmA
Can’t hate on Rick Astley. Should, but can’t.
We’re counting recruitment into the party/army, right?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYxHKM3uEb4
Yvan eht noij, bitches.
I have to do it, even if just to piss SoS off….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZOhm7qS-AI
Dude.
THERE IT IS!!!!!
I didn’t get duded last week and I really missed it.
Sorry, didn’t mean to make you feel neglected.
That’s the entire female gender’s job.
Savage
Sometimes you gotta get together with your boyz
/throws West Side gang sign
//can’t unstick arthritic fingers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeL9gagV_VA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQo1HIcSVtg
Ok, this is DEFINITELY about getting yourself together (lesbian division)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUgwM1Ky228
I thought they had their own conference, not just a division.
Lesbian’s Knees Party: “We’re All About Keeping Things Together, And Then Apart And Then Together Again!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UI-jAhAU1eY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxZInIyOBXk
I had no idea that she fronted for Green Day. You learn something new every day!
/I fucking love this tune
I think this song is about getting one’s shit together? Don’t care, it’s a perfect song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOG3eus4ZSo
Hey look! It’s the “I’m So Full Of Myself That I Think I Can Pull Off The Bowler Hat Thingy” song!
Getting your shit together? Cool, an excuse to drop my new favorite song that I am overplaying the fuck out of:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ii6kJaGiRaI
No horns featured in The Mountain Goats song? No wonder I couldn’t make it all the way to the end!
Goats with horns are called rams dumbass
The old blog Everyday Should Be Saturday first introduced me to this song. It’s probably their best song but they’ve got a few good ones
They’ve got LOTS of good songs! The entire album of Talahassee is magnificent.
A little ditty about minor obsession.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YmQlBfxh4Us
Here’s a good one about getting oneself together:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KJjVMqNIgA
Sneaky and within the parameters. +1
Btw, Sneaky and Within The Parameters are a very under-rated band.
Get together with (non-Boogie) cousins.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1e0u11rgd9Q
Double shot – original & cover version.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pohhMx9EdNc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Te-jTA8g8Ys
File this one under ‘get yourself together’. Gimee a better tune, flyboy!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fVaP6dM1fs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDtoZ8M3Q50
Too Obvious?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj0XD1NFa1I
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=r_ZVrR6lD4s
This is about being together when you drown a fool for talking shit about your old lady after you let him in your house. Til no bubbles coming up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73lj5qJbrms
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjwRIjrC4io
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjQoWfstQUU
SONG TITLE DOUBLE SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LTWwkBNilI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZEURntrQOg
Solid pick.
This is about everybody getting together, really.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdCfYHNctsc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4gRjKsMJ-WI
This is what happens when you don’t listen to a song before posting it. Damn, what an awful song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVudemQmgYM
A parade is kind of a get-together, right?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YWPhmduSDQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COiIC3A0ROM
I think this fits the general theme.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxDbJtlQR3E
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WccfbPQNMbg
I’m feeling funk-a-fied!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSXke6YJjDs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BGe5dT0-v4
Oof! The above is Mike Scott’s angry and petty musical reply to Karl Wallinger splitting off from The Waterboys and forming his own band by the name of World Party. This is the tune that falls within the guidelines.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qB_xka50sME
All of DMX’s Ruff Ryders, big ballers, fly ladies, and street street people are to meet him outside.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thIVtEOtlWM
“Assemble” sounds flashier than “get everyone together.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmU1upyu_J8
Alan Silvestri is a genius at rousing emotional fervor.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cxA3Q96a8XE
Old man Porky coming with the hep jive.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E03NZOIxGmQ
That’s reefer music!
When someone says “hep cat” I always think of Jay Cutler and his refusal to give his offspring the hepatitis vaccine.
So Camden will be a hep kitten?
“Mom, it’s a song about slumber parties!”
“Elisha, this is filth. Go find a Pat Boone album before I spank both of you!”
“Uh, Mrs. Manning? You can spank me if you want.”
“Hush, Daniel. Maybe later.”
——————
“Eli, your mom’s kinda hot.”
“I know Daniel, but she says it’s cuz of the men’s paws.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks9gCpVsdgY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56vLS_KPp9I
We’ll meet at that place where the tin roof has oxidized.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SOryJvTAGs
One Love – Bob Marley (Sorry for the quick picks, but I am logging off now)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdB-8eLEW8g
Already picked, So Brand New Heavies instead.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0gNdQb3nDg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45cYwDMibGo
DOUBLE SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73lj5qJbrms
That’s good work by both of you.
Atlantic City – The Band
A Springsteen song (!) about getting oneself together and getting together with one’s girl.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0eZwpHtcK4
Birds of a Feather – Phish (Only 4 minutes long!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4nGOQpFQ_Y
“Mom, what’s the name of that hard-rock song I like again?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xKVh3O4e9k
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdB-8eLEW8g
Damn it. Missed this one.
They said this is the single that saved their careers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftjEcrrf7r0
One two, one two, bring it on.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmHLGd42UBY
GD it. This was my first pick. Well played Porky
VIRGINIA: Your boy really needs to do a better job of trimming them back.
ASHLEY: [quietly] “Your boy”? I hope she’s talking about Eli.
AMY: She isn’t.
Excellent and accurate.
The Olivia Manning Story will star Jessica Walter.
Sorry if the topic turns out to be a tricky one, folks. I blame Amari Cooper.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fROYY253As