Your “A Day/Week/However Long in the Life” Saturday Evening Thread

Senor Weaselo

Senor Weaselo

Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn’t doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn’t happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
Senor Weaselo

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A little bit of a spin on the Saturday night semi-musical post tonight, since screw it, I can, it’s my show tonight. The world of a freelance musician’s definitely a strange one, where what you’re playing, for what event, and how much notice you’re given to do it could ranges to basically anything. So let’s dive into my last few weeks or so.

I play a lot of weddings these days, and that means I get to play a lot of what you’d consider to be standard wedding songs. We seem to be contractually obligated to play this, because we do it for almost every wedding.

I would much rather play it than Pachelbel’s fucking Canon in D. I am not going to link to that because you have heard it before and I’m sick of it. No matter who I marry, no Pachelbel. That’s a dealbreaker. (I’m pretty sure Senorita Weaselo, being a violinist, understands.)

But we get requests to play a lot of other stuff. These days we play a lot of Ed Sheeran, whether “Perfect” or “Shape of You.” (We do the latter occasionally if we’re asked for poppier stuff, right after we play “Despacito.” No, I’m not kidding, someone wrote a string quartet arrangement of “Despacito.” It’s actually not too bad, all things considered.)

Not a weird wedding song, but something I was glad to hear/play?

Get some Ben Folds up in here, even if we’re not rockin’ the suburbs just like Quiet Riot did. Weird wedding song that I was surprised to hear/play?

Last I checked, this was a breakup song. People know that it’s a breakup song, right? There were no words, but we all know how the song goes. This doesn’t mean I only play weddings. I’m just in the circuit and play a wedding or two a week. I get to play other stuff too!

Last week a friend of mine texted me to ask if I could play something for a recording. I was at Senorita Weaselo’s so I didn’t have my copy of the music, but I borrowed hers—it was from a critical part of the violin rep (I call it our Bible), so of course all of us have our own personal copies.

The most holy of violin holies. Which I played a nice chunk of on like three hours’ notice. Also I haven’t played it or worked on it in over ten years (I should brush back up on it). Go me.

I’m playing an orchestra concert tonight in Brooklyn. One of the pieces we’re playing is a collection of four songs, including an arrangement of this

and my personal favorite part, the last song in the cycle is entitled “Florida Man.” We’ve all seen “Florida Man” posts that are completely ridiculous. Hell, there’s a Twitter account and a hashtag and a meme. And it will be in song form!

What’s next on the horizon? Some summer orchestra stuff, more weddings. Actually attending a wedding that I’m invited to and not playing for once, that’s exciting.

Okay, what’s on tonight?
Well first off, tonight is the DFO Bar Crawl! We should be hearing here and there from Commentists attending the shindig about any goings-on… going on. And/or them asking for bail money. I put it at 50-50.

No championship sports on. Toronto leads the Warriors 3-1, and I still think I’d rather listen to *googles world’s worst rappers* all of those guys (and gals) over Drake. But since this all started because Kevin Durant (and then the rest of the team except Steph and Draymond) got hurt, we’re just gonna blame him on this one.

No offense, KD, it’s just a hilarious song. Who else would rhyme “Dirk Nowitski” with “Dirk Nowitski”? By the way, yes, also over Drake. Anyway, Game 5 of that is in Toronto on Monday.

In “please please please work out” news, the St. Louis Blues are a win away from their first Stanley Cup, and more importantly, someone beating Boston in a championship. Thank the Milwaukee Bucks for beating the Celtics. Anyway, Game 6 in St. Louis is tomorrow night. ROOT FOR INTERNET DAD!

Let’s Fighting Love
UFC 238: Cejudo vs. Moraes Prelims (8:00 Eastern, ESPN)
Don’t ask me, no idea. At some point is UFC going to continue numbering their events? In 50 years are we going to have UFC 1,392 or something?

Boxing: Valdez vs. Sanchez (10:00, ESPN)
According to the guide the fight is for the WBO featherweight title, held by Valdez.

Saturday Night Baseball
Cardinals-Cubs, Dodgers-Giants, OR Rockies-Mets—check your listing (7:00, FOX)

What the hell are (Super) Regionals?
College baseball super regionals! Best 2 of 3
Texas Tech at Oklahoma State (6:00, ESPNU) (Game 2, Texas Tech leads 1-0)
Michigan at UCLA (9:00, ESPN2) (Game 2, Michigan leads 1-0)
Duke at Vanderbilt (9:00, ESPN U) (Game 2, Duke leads 1-0)

Don’t spoil the season premiere of BattleBots for me, but I know some shit went down in the Quantum-Blacksmith fight.

Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
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Wakezilla

.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I seem to have awoken from my post pub crawl nap, with a bit of a headache.
I can’t imagine why.

ALXMAC
ALXMAC

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Same boat, different captain

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

ha ha I fell sound asleep at 7 PM and woke up at 3 AM. I felt fine but I kept wondering “well what do I do now?”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

Montreal Alouettes once again making excellent football decisions as they have decided to fire coach Mike Sherman on the eve of the season.

Whether it’s a coach or a GM, it seems like they do this every year

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

This is funny. It’s also chiropractor porn

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

That’s what I handed out to everyone!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

I got a question: Is Spotify songs compatible in itunes?

blaxabbath

I think we just pulled off our first productive weekend day — time with the kid, farmers market , bfast; then, baby down for nap, we go work on tasks separately for preparing to move (each enjoying our own music/podcasts; meet back up about 2p and play/hang with kid, talk about our progress/challenges/thoughts; back at it but in a lighter capacity bc we’re both kinda tired and the baby is back and forth needing attention. I found a restaurant gift card from like, our wedding?, so we got the baby bathed and pulled off going to dinner together, and he got to play in the grass afterwards. Now he’s down at home. We’re hanging out before bed.

Think we might pull this off.

WCS

That’s good hustle. It does get easier. Well, I don’t know if “easier” is the right term; you just adjust to it.

Wakezilla

/is still waiting for Toddlerzilla to become easier to parent or being to adjust to her shenanigans.

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WCS

“Easier” and “adjustment” go hand-in-hand. There is ALWAYS a new shitshow to deal with. Understanding why it happened, and how to deal with it is the problem. It’s a constantly changing scenario. Keep the kid on the same schedule: wake up, food, play, food, more play, whatever you do. Every parent is different, and so is every kid. Make a script for the day, and stick to it. It allows the kid to be a kid, and allows you to find time to take care of other stuff. In my case, that’s work, laundry, and liquor. It took a few weeks, but, I’ve found a system that’s worked for me for three years!

Wakezilla

The biggest thing for us will be when she’s 3 and I can put her in everything. We currently live in an apartment and Toddlerzilla is a superball of energy that needs a ton of exercise to burn off. On nice days, we take her to the park which is super. The thing is, we live in Calgary and the weather is shit, which is the problem. We have her in swimming, but more activities don’t begin until 3. Then I can throw in gymnastics and kick boxing and soccer, and long distance running, etc.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Finished the sponch in the arclight. Come at me bro

yeah right

Fierce.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

Slipknot: I forgot how good their tunes are. Imma going to need to include them in my new workout playlist once I get my life back from school on the 26th

yeah right

Works for me.

litre_cola

Just told to me by a friends friend. “Fuck this, my roomates are here imma go get high and fist myself in the open”
More power to her.

Wakezilla

A fist? That’s gotta hoyt

blaxabbath

You got fun friends.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

Last night before the Mrs and Toddlerzilla return home. And here I am frantically doing my school work like a nerd. Fuck.

litre_cola

This is their best work.

Wakezilla

Agreed. It’s been stuck in my head all day

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Batting practice in Anaheim! 4 pitches, 3 home runs. Well done, Mariners.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

So on my Uber ride home, I had this amazing existential conversation with the driver. He’s recently arrived from Orange County so whatever.

Brick Meathook is in the back seat with Angie Dickenson and Raquel Welsh and I’ll let him finish that story.

But I talked to the Uber driver about psychedelics and the LSD and it was beautiful. A passing of the baton if you will.

That kid will be fine and he will remember our conversation forever.

Brothers in tripping forever.

So, how was your day?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I’m inebriated and eating SPONCH. So pretty great.

Wakezilla

“Brick Meathook is in the back seat with Angie Dickenson and Raquel Welsh and I’ll let him finish that story.”

Wait, what?

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

true story

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

If I had been informed tripping was on the menu, I would have made it down there.

yeah right

Show your work next time!

Gratliff

Good Omens is an amazing show but I can’t say whether or not it’s any good.

King Hippo

we need MOAR Sunny Philly, but Archer 1999 is a pretty decent summer run

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Fuck you, Kal El

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I even made it home in time to watch the Padres. How about that for an LA drink trip?

yeah right

Top notch!

Worthy of Starwood Preferred points.

Fucking outstanding day.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Bill Cosby Ghost?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Know what’s not a great thought exercise? Cataloguing all the different ways one is a failure. I done ran out of fingers.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Have a few shots and you’ll have double the fingers to continue counting.

litre_cola

Ayo gets it.

King Hippo

yes indeed

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sounds productive. Mine is stressing about work; make sure it is something you have no control over or can’t do anything about until a later date.

King Hippo

oh yeah, I DREAM about that shit

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Good for you; you can join me in a premature death after an unhappy work life.

King Hippo

I am just trying to get to 50 and hopefully get social security disability

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I may not have been the glibbest DFOer on the bar-crawl, nor the earliest, but goddamit I was the best dressed.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sure.

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ballsofsteelandfury

This is true.

King Hippo

I imagine Brick as a gentleman who don’t even own a pair of sweatpants

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

And as we all know; he’s had his balls and asshole freshly waxed.

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Wakezilla

Well, that’s just great etiquette

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Me and BFC have the same ball-waxer.

*BFC and I*

yeah right

Word!

Wakezilla

Were you in a tux? I could see you in a tux

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

kind of

Dunstan
Dunstan

Fine, but when I show up in a bow tie for the next one you’ll have only yourself to blame

yeah right

Your shit was stylish.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Happy Saturday.

King Hippo

Mormon rave?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No but brown liquor and white bands only.

*Except Chuck Berry.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

HAWT

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I have passed Pendleton on the train, and I finally no longer have to worry about sudden and total femur drumming at any moment. I don’t know how you guys do it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

High as fuck.

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King Hippo

are ANY of the Small Bears’ players not mega-douches?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Fuuuuuuuuck the caaaaaaaards

King Hippo

Y’all sure are doing it. Sheesh. This was our good pitcher we brung in, too. Tomorrow is Waino after 126-pitches last time out, virtual forfeit.

yeah right

What BFC said.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Mega-douches; the next idea to help with California wild fires.

King Hippo

that’s good engineering hustle!

herodotus450
herodotus450

After further review, it seems Katie Nolan has some half-assed podcast on espn, and it’s kinda boring and a waste of her assets.

King Hippo

A reminder – first place, bitches!

https://predictor.fifa.com/match/leagues/leaderboard/1057

herodotus450
herodotus450

Below the fold woo

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Woot! Even par!

herodotus450
herodotus450

I like that, since I can’t see anyone else’s predictions, I assume no one can see mine and laugh accordingly.

litre_cola

Hippo gunna get a used fleshlight BULLEEE DAT

King Hippo

gently used

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

*Small dick, premature ejaculator, only 6,352 miles. Still has the “new Fleshlight smell.”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hey lady bfc is mad at me, so that’s fun

King Hippo

You’re not allowed to do things without her, especially when you show up to dinner drunk. Any male fun is immediately suspect.

King Hippo

but tell her you should have taken Lyft sponch guy up on his offer, that’ll shut her up good

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Can she be appeased by a SPONCH offering?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s a hard no

King Hippo

didya already try the Michael Jackson B-7 joke? Make sure to tell it LOUD

King Hippo

my ex-wife liked the B-7 joke, but when we were married, she would totally not have. That’s how relationships are.

Fronkenshteen

I’ll create an act of subterfuge!

[does “Carlton Dance”]

Fronkenshteen

How’s our pub crawlers? Alive?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Maybe

King Hippo

didn’t even bring Hippo back any black tar, they’s ded 2 me

King Hippo

ah, but do they deserve to be? Is that the question? And if so, if sooooo, who answers?

yeah right

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

SHIT SHOW BINGO:

“What does a boy have to do to have Michael Jackson stick his tongue in his asshole?”

“B-7”

King Hippo

I know we just put up a new banner, but still….

yeah right

That guy was playing to his audience.

Dunstan
Dunstan

I’m sorry that my penis sucking skills were insufficient to win the tiebreaker for DFO

herodotus450
herodotus450

How come we never renamed pubs to something more American like “Freedom Halls” or something in the post-9/11 frenzy?

ballsofsteelandfury

A successful DFO crawl has been had! Thank you to all that came out!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Successful is a relative term, sir

yeah right

Fucking hell that was a goddamn blast.

Say when?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I definitely shouldn’t have made the train, but I did. Damn you, enticing dirty bingo and beer!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sir, it was shitshow bingo. Show some respect.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I just bailed on the DFO bar crawl so hopefully there’s food where lady bfc has picked or otherwise this sponch is dinner

King Hippo

so you came late, left early, you’re already a bonafide Angelino!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

As long as I came, amirite?

herodotus450
herodotus450

It’s too bad there isn’t some sprot specifically designed for summer, a pasttime if you will, to fill in these pointless summer nights. Oh well. And another thing, whatever happened to Katie Nolan?

King Hippo

is she still a thing? I mean, she’s attractive, but I didn’t think her schtick was built to last. Phrasing.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Last I haerd she was frozen out from Fox because they … ? and then espn hired her but I’m a super cool gen Omega millenial who doesn’t even own a tv so I dont know what happened after that.

yeah right

So much Sponch!

King Hippo

can you work with that as a pickup line?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The guy in the back of this Lyft line is willing to fuck me for sponch

King Hippo

was he a generous and gentle lover?

litre_cola

Soft hands

blaxabbath

We’ve begun packing/purging. Losing my big yard when we move so selling a lot of that stuff.

I’d forgotten how annoying the masses are when you’re trying to sell stuff on OfferUp/craigslist.

King Hippo

purging is quite therapeutic

King Hippo

also large yards are fool’s gold. NEVER worth the trouble.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Lots of bushes always just get in the way

King Hippo

oh man, those were the worst. Just endless bullshit.

King Hippo

new Silversun album dropped this weekend

blaxabbath

I like that band’s music.

yeah right

A lot.

herodotus450
herodotus450

240p musical comedy videos from the early 2000s you say?

WCS

Tom Wilson is hilarious. It seems as he’s stopped doing his travel blog, which is a damn shame. It was very funny.

Dunstan
Dunstan

Speaking of musical comedy, here’s one for Rikki:
https://youtu.be/P_jjRNMOopA

herodotus450
herodotus450

Pachelbel you say?

King Hippo

Yay, I get BROADCAST #BFIB tonite. I broke my “no gambling on el beisbol” rule to put $50 on Bastard Man Small Bears, because I am a curse today.

King Hippo

my jinx WORKED, fuck yeah!!