Yeah, up here in The Canada Don Cherry was fired because his last windy rant included the phrase ‘you people’. He was talking about poppies. Parse that out, Einstein. He’s been a divisive TV shouty person for 39 years and was once voted as the seventh greatest Canadian in a CBC poll/doc series. He was essentially your blowhard drunk uncle that barked louder and louder as the night wore on and he realized he was losing the argument that he brought up in the first place. Let’s head over to our usual thingy.
Fallout:
-The NFL delivered some highly entertaining games yesterday on the heels of some fantastic tilts the day previous. LSU and Minnesota delivered the W and were rewarded with the #1 and #7 spots in the AP poll. Fucking well done.
-Not well? That’d be David Johnson and Saquon Barkley. Both seem to be putting their team over their health and that never turns out fine.
-Charles Rogers was an extremely gifted wr at Michigan State that flamed out in the pros due to injuries, substance abuse and bump-ins with the law. He passed at the age of 38.
-Injuries? Too numerous to mention. Lots of guys in concussion protocol including at least 4 (!) Giants I’m aware of. Lots of MRI’s happening today as well.
-Pat Shurmur’s seat is getting hotter. Check this out-the backup left tackle that got torched by the Jets D after starter Nate Solder went down had no idea he was going to play that position because he’d always practiced as a ‘jumbo’ tight end on the right side. These little tidbits about players not being ‘coached up’ properly are leaking out which suggests to me that Shumur is about to lose the room.
TO THE GAME!
Seahawks/Niners:
Jimmy G went off last week but San Franny still averages a mere 28.75 pass attempts per game. Good luck to those of you that have either Coleman or Breida or both. Me? I’ve got Chris Carson and I hope he pulls a Kenyan Drake. The latter went for 110 and a TD vs. this vauntful D. Btw, that D has not yet faced a top 15 qb yet. I mean, yes, they’ve crushed the throats of teams they should have crushed but Russell Wilson is in another (in the convo of league MVP) category altogether.
Hey, let’s do some typing!
Let’s take a moment to acknowledge the great job Joe Tessitore is doing tonight: it’s not often the play-by-play guy manages to fellate the troops and the officials within a 5 minute period but by God, Joe managed to nail it!
Good thing the Patriots aren’t playing tonight. The vacuum generated by the suction would blow out your eardrums and Eustachian tubes.
“member 28-3” 49ers thought it was over at halftime
These are two utterly unlikeable teams.
You may think different. However, as a veteran my opinion counts a little more than yours, pal. Fuck you.
Bad news for you. You’ll never urinate on my frozen grave.
Good news for you. You could urinate in the urn of my ashes.
I SHALL URINATE ON THINGS NONETHELESS
Sometimes intentionally
As a fellow veteran (target not bubblehead), I dislike them less than you, and really don’t care about either.
I SHALL KILL YOU LAST, BROTHER
I don’t know if I should believe you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9eVV8HHtqRo
Yeah, I get it. You cleaned toilets on a submarine. You’re a hero.
If by “cleaned toilets” you meant “split atoms” you are surprisingly correct for a Canadian.
I’ve had some meals in college after which I “split atoms” in the bathroom.
ET or MM?
I TURNED WRENCHES NOT TWEAKERS
As an MR, I usually spent all my time fixing MM and BT fuckups. Those guys could cross-thread a lightbulb.
Yes! I’m *checks notes* still getting murdered by the Hippo
if that CarsonDOWN was in Q1 I’d be super itchy
I’ll take the L. Gallup helped me win in my money league this week.
Sharkbait morphed into a bag of pills so slowly nobody else noticed.
Now that was a “fuck you” score.
Booger: “The fuck is up with these refs?”
Whoever-the-fuck-that-is: “These are the best referees to ever be gifted from on high to us filthy peasants”
That’s a nice euphemism for watching a Fins or JEST game. The Fins/JEST game was especially putrid.
2 or 3 good officiating calls, but how many fuckups?
TOUCHED DOWN!
Sure wish Clowney had been this effective when he was with the .500s.
Karma for that bad Roughing The Passer?
Eat shit Refs
EVERGREEN
/German citizens flood the office with job applications
Jimmy G doing his best Danny D imitation.
Rough night, Janeane
#StillWithHer
you are a true light in teh darkness!
SUDDEN CHANGE!
Time to boo an 8-0 team!
Oh for fuck’s sake
Bullshit call.
Yeah, makeup calls!
Man, these refs are PAC-12 terrible tonight.
That was a clean sack. BS
Eh. I thought that call was correct. Wasn’t on Clowney, but…
9 points. Still time foar Russell Wilson to die, and I’m good.
If you’re cheering for people to die? #whynottrump
/I mean, if that’s your thing
Tongue in cheek only, of course.
Of course.
[makes exaggerated winking motion]
Live by the Tartt, die by the Tartt.
This is Russell Wilson’s MVP trophy!
How will they make the trophy if he’s not hot enough to melt the steel (beams)
Helmet catch!
As i was saying.
Muddafukka
We swapped out the football with a greased-up turkey. Let’s see if anyone notices!
That would be an interesting Buttfumble
STOP FUCKING FUMBLING YOU GODDAMN COCK WALLETS!
Getting really tired of that fumbling business. Is the wallet full of cocks or made of cocks?
I think it can be both?
Can be both
and what a Xmas idea!!
No greater proof of evolution than a dog committing insurance fraud
Looks like my arthritic chow mix trying to get up off the floor. Unfortunately, without the miraculous healing in the last bit.
Feel sorry for his asphalt-scarred penis.
Jimmy presses, Seahawks intercepts.
Well shit, that just happened.
Has any defense done a Power Rangers celebration yet?
Thank you Janeane!
#You’reWithHER
ARGH
I’m still not seeing Emmanuel dammit. Meh, just keep Wilson off the field and I be a’ight. Probably.
He ded
Good kitty
Ohhhh! Videogames! What next???
Wind chill of 7 already. Glad I moved 250 miles south of the upper peninsula for the warmer climate.
So what, like 12 degrees?
That’s what it is here. It’s actually a wind chill of 1 in the Soo, so technically warmer climate!
Positively tropical.
Heh heh. Meanwhile, today I got frustrated because I am having trouble getting the temperature in my solar-headed soil sterilization chamber above 130.
Wilson really eating shit tonight, eh?
My fault. Took him in daily fantasy. Sorry about that.
A pacifier shaped mouth guard can’t be that intimidating
but practical in case a rave breaks out
You got some X?
spaRklEqueeN said not to give you any, sorry
So, Russell Wilson is a girl scout now?
Where my damned Thin Mints?
This UP thing with Russell Wilson is the corniest shit ever.
I love it when the commentators have no idea what’s actually going on and are just making shit up.
“Uhhh, the players are all jumping on each other. I guess the ball is loose?”
“A lot of the 49ers seem excited! They probably have the ball?”
“They do! Some 49er has the ball! Let’s see who actually comes out with it in 3 minutes!”
“Fuck fuck fuck fuck, someone throw it to commercial already!”
I always wanted commercials, not a replay.
-Advertisers
Well, fuck. There goes that bet. Nyquil and bed time!
Not so fast! Seattle always plays close games and you’re going to miss the best quarter.
Musical interlude?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePg1tbia9Bg
Dammit, HOX determined to shoot their dicks off.
FUCQUE YEAH
You see want madness Brick has brought. Hippo save us!