Yeah, up here in The Canada Don Cherry was fired because his last windy rant included the phrase ‘you people’. He was talking about poppies. Parse that out, Einstein. He’s been a divisive TV shouty person for 39 years and was once voted as the seventh greatest Canadian in a CBC poll/doc series. He was essentially your blowhard drunk uncle that barked louder and louder as the night wore on and he realized he was losing the argument that he brought up in the first place. Let’s head over to our usual thingy.
Fallout:
-The NFL delivered some highly entertaining games yesterday on the heels of some fantastic tilts the day previous. LSU and Minnesota delivered the W and were rewarded with the #1 and #7 spots in the AP poll. Fucking well done.
-Not well? That’d be David Johnson and Saquon Barkley. Both seem to be putting their team over their health and that never turns out fine.
-Charles Rogers was an extremely gifted wr at Michigan State that flamed out in the pros due to injuries, substance abuse and bump-ins with the law. He passed at the age of 38.
-Injuries? Too numerous to mention. Lots of guys in concussion protocol including at least 4 (!) Giants I’m aware of. Lots of MRI’s happening today as well.
-Pat Shurmur’s seat is getting hotter. Check this out-the backup left tackle that got torched by the Jets D after starter Nate Solder went down had no idea he was going to play that position because he’d always practiced as a ‘jumbo’ tight end on the right side. These little tidbits about players not being ‘coached up’ properly are leaking out which suggests to me that Shumur is about to lose the room.
TO THE GAME!
Seahawks/Niners:
Jimmy G went off last week but San Franny still averages a mere 28.75 pass attempts per game. Good luck to those of you that have either Coleman or Breida or both. Me? I’ve got Chris Carson and I hope he pulls a Kenyan Drake. The latter went for 110 and a TD vs. this vauntful D. Btw, that D has not yet faced a top 15 qb yet. I mean, yes, they’ve crushed the throats of teams they should have crushed but Russell Wilson is in another (in the convo of league MVP) category altogether.
Hey, let’s do some typing!
Chase the Hobo will miss this time. DRAW DRAW DRAW!!!
WE WANT A TIE! WE WANT A TIE!
“Chase the Hobo” will be the next proto-indie band that makes a shitty song that’s used in 47 different commercials for trucks and insurance.
So many Marshawn gifs on Twitter now
Seahawks and bad throws. Name a more dynamic duo
Robert Kraft and Asian hands?
Robert Kraft and Slave hands?
Tom Brady and air pressure gauges?
Dallas Cowboys and massive amount of cocaine?
motherfucker can’t even get them 10 fucking yards to win
PUNT!!!
Giraffe boy has lots of time here for hilarious derp
McLaughlin group for the win
WHY WERE THEY THROWING?
WHY AM I SHOUTING?
Don’t fuck it up don’t fuck it up don’t fuck it up
You sound like my wife when the doctor asked me if I wanted to cut the umbilical cord.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT
“Russell might have underthrown it…”
What gave it away, Booger, the interception?
Glenn Greenwald?
And that’s why you hand the football to Marshawn Lynch!
This game is insane
That looked like a Tecmo Super Bowl interception.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT!
great fucking line backing!
I suppose Jesus made Russ throw that interception, too?
Only his 2nd INT of the year. And both were back breaking mistakes.
still gets my imaginary MVP vote
SUDDENEST OF CHANGES
Would love a pick-six here…
Pretty close.
THAT’S GOOD TOO
Almost
Do we see the greased pig one more time? I wouldn’t be shocked…
Russ is gonna break Manning and Foles’ record in 2 weeks against Philly. Not great!
Why are we reviewing this?
Attempted commercial break?
Excellent point
“Hold my tepid tap water.”
— Russell W., Seattle
MVP!!!
Thats some bullshit right there.
This is fucking insane!
Wow!
Wow, what a bullshit way for me to pick up a possibly crucial point for a 5th “sack.”
WOW
WOW
MOM
*paging Balls to the pornhub search suggestion window*
Shenanigans!
WTF Refs! You can’t blow that dead!
Wha’ happened to Lockett?
“Fuck it, I’m goin’ deep.”
RIP Sexy Rexy
Time to throw the old bomberooski.
—Wade Phillip’s dad
Go route to Metcalf, now.
“Go route to Montcrief? Never again.”
— Mike T., Pittsburgh, PA,
“We want the ball and we’re going to score!”
— Not Russell Wilson
I know some of y’all cheering for the tie, but I want a pick-6 to Sherm so I can hear all the pearl-clutchers be all salty at his post-game rant.
Team Sherman since all the white people bought Manning jerseys after he declared himself the best corner in the game before they blew Denver off the fucking field
Sorry, Hippeh. You got your win back, if that’s what you want to call that walking abortion
plus I had the 1980s to numb me to pain
I’m up a point in FF, (and a questionable point at that), so I also would appreciate this.
But why is geno smith making the call
So Niners derpy clock management or Seattle’s stone hands defense — who ya got?
How the fuck did the Bears lose Robbie Gould AND also not find Chase McLaughlin?
WE WANT A TIE!
each team really does deserve a point here
Not that I want the 49ers to win a Super Bowl (or not win a Super Bowl for that matter), but seeing a team go 18-0-1 would be pretty frickin’ sweet.
I wonder what those dickheads in Miami would do.
/just kidding; we all know what they would do
MOAR FITBAW!!!!
GO ROOKIE GO
This is quite the sphincter-clencher.
Comedy incoming
Well shit. That was about as perfect as you can be.
MISS IT HOBO!
Jimmy G in the pocket right now:
Booger is spot on.
GODDAMMIT Janeane, we’ve already spotted them 21.
Greased footballs for everyone!
finally landed that sweet Crisco endorsement
Janeane looks like he wants no part of this.
shouldn’t have had that halftime peyote, I guess