So I’ve been on the road all day and have relatively little firsthand knowledge of what the shit went on this afternoon. A brief (aka halfass) recap after this important message:
WOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Ok. I’m good. I’m cool.
So the Bills (WOOOO!) handed the Iggles a golden opportunity to pull even with the hated Dallas Cowboys (BOOO!) by beating the ever-loving snot out of the latter in front of God, Jerral and everyone. In typical Philadelphia fashion, they took this wonderful gift and fucking trashed it.
Seriously. You Cheez-Wiz-Loving mutants don’t deserve the gift win the Bills gave you earlier this year. The fucking Tanking LOLfins just embarrassed you. I for one welcome the first 6-10 division winner. #NFCLeast.
Not that it will help Philadelphians’ cherished inferiority complex and (justified) sense of self-loathing, but they actually didn’t have the worst day out there today. Cincinnati and the re-ascendant Ginger Dalton finally got on the winning side of the ledger after 11 straight losses against the Jests. Carolina in turn allowed the Redacteds to run all over them (in every sense of the word) at home. Jerry Richardson must be rolling over in his grave to have his beloved Panthers beaten by a team whose mascot wasn’t even counted under the Three-Fifths Compromise. Wait, he’s not dead?
There were a bunch of other games. Stay tuned for Hippo Thoughts.
ON TO TONIGHT!
P*TRIOTS v. HOUSTON “TEXANS” (8:30 Eastern, 7:30 DFO):
Let’s be honest: this is going to suck for all right-thinking, God-fearing football fans. Bill Belichick has Bill O’Brien’s number, as much or more as any of the rotten fruit of his gnarled, twisted coaching “tree”. He’s 4-0, and O’Brien’s not going to pull anything new out of that gigantic pit in his chin.
As always, the 500s’ chances rest solely on Deshaun Watson’s shoulders. And as usual, those shoulders will likely spend a LOT of time on the turf. New England’s defense is just too good this year against an offensive line that has been problematic at the best of times. Look for Will Fuller’s knee to self-destruct in the second quarter, followed by Watson’s entire skeleton in the third.
Still, the light of hope flickers in the gale. Foxborough Delenda Est
Should’ve started Johnson in DFS Gamblor.
Imagine a list of the 10 most prolific female pornstars of all time
I guarantee that chris collinsworth has sucked more metaphorical dick than the amount of physical dick that all but 3 of those females have in there lifetime.
And that’s only because one of those 3 only does girl/girl scenes now
I put way too much thought into these
Huh, it’s almost like if you enforce the rules, a certain “preparation edge” goes away?
It’s never been tried before.
It is NOT COOL to show footage of how Mike Glennon died.
IT’S NAWT FACKIN’ OVAH
My drinking? Exactly.
Yah, Gostkowski missed a PAT during the 28-3 comeback, so not worrying!
Trump won. Nothing is guaranteed until it’s over.
I also wouldn’t rule out Russian and/or FBI machinations this Q4, neither
PRAISE SHA’NKLOR
I’m in Kevlar Kowboy Hell
https://twitter.com/jessithebuckeye/status/1201285958672490497
This is a wrestling thingy. The Shield used to come out as a paramilitary mercenary thing and their entrance always started with “SIERRA HOTEL INDIA ECHO LIMA DELTA”
From left to right: Crossfit guy who got his dick picks leaked when he cheated on his girlfriend with a neo-nazi, Prettier Khal Drogo, Titty Master
That doesn’t make it better
That’s some Jedi Genius shit, huh?
perhaps 5 yards closer LMAO?
Brady is fucking good that he excels with optimum pass protection!!!!
No way!
Belichick preparing his fingers for a good sniff.
“It was good.”
— Bill O’B.’s mom, Houston, TX
….of course.
1st and 30? TRUE NFL BLITZ!
JFC. Even Twitter, a company that cannot make money and wouldn’t exist if Trump had lost, is dunking on the Shitty Clippers
WOW. Pats called for a pick play
Edelman is kind of a dirty little prick, yeah?
He did attempt to murder an Eagles CB on an easy pick a few weeks ago
oh yeah, I had already forgotten
“He one-a dem sneaky Joooz, ya know.”
—MAGA
He’s one of the good onez
FINISH THEM!!!!
Even the referees are giving up on new england
Could…could I have been wrrr….wrrrrrrrrr…wrong????
Looks like it.
While I have been a P*ts fan since 1968, when I moved to Texas I naturally had to have a local team to root for; since I had hated the Cowboys for the same amount of time, I became an Oilers fan. I have pulled for Houston as my Texas team since they were stood up. So, even though my favorite team is gonna lose, at least it’s to my second favorite team.
That there is some first class rationalization right there!
I would expect nothing less from a P*ts fan
Glad new England wanted to see that happen again
THESHAUN IS THE GOOD
Obviously it was incomplete, it wasn’t a Pates player
Edit: hahah nevermind, eat it Pates
Throw beers at these chucklefucks
That gift that tells your lover I like how you are thin and conventionally attractive, and expect you to stay that way.
“A year ago, I had no idea how much this would change me!” Yeah, you went from a hot skinny wife to being a hot skinny wife with a weird hobby. Shocking.
Peloton won’t let the Lexus for Christmas commercials go unchallenged for yuppie mindshare
The SNF crew reminds me of the Republicans in Congress looking for any loophole to say, “Brady sucked out loud but NE win on technicality.”
STANDS AS CALLED
As we edge closer yet to 28-3.
“Bill O’Brien doesn’t get a lot of accolades.”
Yeah, because he kinda sucks at his job.
BRAVE officials, overruling the P*ts players LIEK THAT
Evening, folks. Just got home from dinner at my folks and… this is not what I wanted to see.
Well, I feel the same way about your avatar…
How long before this split screen commercial bullshit becomes a permanent fixture of these games?
why do you think they keep imploring us to buy these ridiculous 80″ TVs?
I am so confused as to why these Amazon commercials feature so many independent contractors that in no way work for Amazon or represent Amazon or pass any legal liability onto Amazon. Seems strange that they’d advertise for all these totally independent contractors that have no affiliation with Amazon in any way.
hey show sum respect a few of them make a whole 50 cents above minimum wage (if a returning seasonal labourer)
But then you account for self-employment tax and all of their expenses, and they’d be better off with $1/hr in company scrip
oh shit, is it almost time for me to not give a tin shit about the Olympics again??
Yeah these are only the summer olympics. The good one isn’t until 2022
Speaking of more drinking.
WOMP WOMP, you bid too much on the toaster and your spelunker fell over the cliff
IT BEGINS
so very elegant and graceful
Wait, do we like boobs? Collective opions here. Send .gif evidence, please.
You want photographic evidence of me enjoying boobs? The last time I sent someone that, I got a restraining order.
As long as they’re tasteful. And not too big.
On the plus side, I’m still off so I don’t have to commute to work tomorrow in the snow/sleet crap going on outside.
Also more drinking.
a choice nobody ever regrets!
Bravo
same here. off until Thursday.
This dickhead deserves to be hit by a train. Take out the headphones, and get a better haircut, jagoff.
Who
Be the end of him when that train comes, too. Because NO SOUL.
I live bet the P*ts, not enough that I will hope to win the bet.
But I suspect I will.
Goddamn, this is some appropriation taking place
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1HP0yudV2o
“I don’t think anybody’s gonna argue that one” -Collinsworth, on the PI negating Brady’s interception
I will argue with that call C[h]ris, because I am not all up on Brady’s p-p. It didn’t look any worse than what happens on every play; Roby didn’t interfere in any material way. At WORST it’s a borderline call, I say it’s easily on the right side of legal.
Dreamboat looks old
THERE’S THE BABY BUSTER MOVE!!
Should have put his helmet in TB12’s chest.
Literally into his chest. Like a reverse chestburster.
Made it to our Tahoe Airbnb. Got in snf and just took NyQuil and a edible
I’m ready to sleep fir 50 hours.
I’m not gonna pollute it!
trash call
awwwww man, Tom almost had his TD pass
DERPBOAT
aw boo