Hey, how y’all like the pidgin-espanol for “combination?” Although it won’t mean MOAR until next weekend, there’s enough on the JV slate to merit some discussion.
First, the Lesser Footy. Rise and shine early for the UNDEFEATED, UN-DRAWN Muthafuckin’ Toffees! This week brings home to West Brom (7:30, Peacock), and the inevitable, crushing letdown performance. Prove me wrong, shiny new midfield!
Continuing with its lovely, made-fer-teevee scheduling, the 10a window contains only Leeds hosting our beloved Mighty Whitey (10:00, Peacock). Per Litre, Leeds rested folks mid-week, and got bit in the bollocks and are now out of Caribou contention. Fulham won 1-nil, and marched on. But this is the fixture they really need, after a meek showing Week One.
Palace away to Ole Gunnar’s United is your (apparently NAWT) spotlight dance (12:30, Peacock), and this is the type of fixture that has sometimes tripped up the Red Devils of late. Of course, I predicted them to make the Great Leap Forward in 2020-21, and if such prediction is right…a comfortable home win is in the cards. We shall have to wait for Wakey Reacts Reasonably.
I guess this is the weekend NBC’s goons lean heavy on folk to sign up for Peacock? Still, Hammers at Gooners is a tiny heroine drip for the fee-resistant (3:00, NBCSN). This should be a hammering, and not to David Moyes’ good side.
Another quadruple-header is on tap for Sunday, with the key match (Redshite at Chelski) bleeding 20-ish minutes into RedZone. No. Smire. All but the 2p match (which nobody will watch) are Peacock-only.
Bundesliga and Serie A start in full, with another smattering of HAWT Santander action. Fuck knows where everything will be broadcast, let’s figure that out together! Don’t forget your Mexi-channels.
Litre’s descent into madness London Jaguras (Fulham) edition
I got this idea by Horatio watching my meltdowns on Twitter, so week by week I am going to attempt to convey what it feels like to be a supporter who’s club is constantly trying to avoid relegation. This week Fulham got hided in the opener against Arsenal, and beat Ipswich Town in the Caribou Cup. My thoughts this week;
Well fuck, I didn’t think we would win anyway. How the fuck can we expect to do so with basically the same cb’s that got us relegated last year? I hope Mitro isn’t that hurt, why did he start on the bench? Lets bring the new boys in midweek.
Hey, we beat Ipswich Town! Ok, we are ready to beat Leeds just like we did last year! Back 4 are gelling and we will be fine……
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Friday night, ESPN televised Campbell at Coastal Carolina. I shit you not. So, take whatever competitive morsels you can get, and learn to love it.
Tulsa (+22.5) at Oklahoma State (Noon, ESPN)
Fuck me, it will be strange to see a home BDSM State fixture, without the array of orange paddlers. It will be almost like my nomenclature don’t make no sense or some shit.
Houston (+4) at Baylor (Noon, Fox)
The ultimate chaos game, was hastily scheduled (like 6 days in advance, poor grad assistants) after both sides lost their opening opponent to teh #NuAIDS. In other words…take the points, who the fuck knows what will happen. Plus, BayBay is replacing NINE defensive starters.
Central Florida (-7.5) at Georgia Tech (3:30, ABC)
Holy cats, Vegas sure ain’t buying the Bees, coming off an opening win in Tallahassee. For so long, the Hitler Mice were underrated, but this seems quite the over-reaction. I will surely bet this one, and lose.
Miami (+2.5) at Louisville (7:30, ABC)
Both these sides are (foolishly) ranked, for what the fuck-ever that means in a September like this. The coaches are good, so maybe this will be watchable.
Wake Forest (+1.5) at NC State (8:00, ACCN)
No shit, this is the LATE game this week. Absolutely fuckall for the West Coast viewer/insomniac/tweaker. Running joke in Wolven Land is that we finally (for reals, almost every September game of late has been at noon, and reminiscent of the Bataan Death March) get a September night game in Carter-Finley…and no fans can attend. Wake is usually weakest early (lots of timing-based stuff in their offense), and my Wolven Sort are likely vile shite again. But you absolutely should watch. Because I have to, and you don’t want tWBS’ ghost to haunt your ass.
Calling all pokemon nerds. I’ve got 3 unopened packs of pokemon cards from the ’90s including a 1995 pack of Japanese pokemon cards. Any idea of their worth? We sold one pack for 100 bucks but we also sold 2 individual Charizard cards, one of them for 1000 the other for 870. I’m debating the gamble of opening the packs and hoping for a rare card.
I know nothing about pokemon.
Ideas?
If I know anything about human nature, it’s that the unopened packs are more valuable because of the PROMISE of something good being inside.
That’s the whole thing. It’s an 11 card deck and the majority of pokemon cards sell for about 5-8 dollars each.
Guess I’m falling for the Promise concept myself.
Don’t open.
PSA time: If you have more than 1 screen at home, get yourself a colorimeter to calibrate shit propely – it really is worth every every penny (especially if you shop right and get a rebadged spyder5 for like half the price XD )
Trevor Lawrence comes out as bisexual in the next 25 years. I’m giving generous odds-hit me up on OnlyFans.
That’s quite the beard he’s sporting. I’ll take that bet.
In all fairness, with surgeons today you can’t reaaaaally be sure until the fateful “Congrats, motherfucker, yer gonna be a dad” talk 😀
Hahaha. Do we need to have an OFFline talk?
Only if you promise that my shallow grave is in a scenic location!
Good lord; their hair care budget must be astronomical.
The shampoo fights were what broke them up.
No, he’s not a conservative evangelical preacher.
Apparently we won, judging by the “your fucking bastards won, goddamn it” shout from the wife that woke me… So, uhhh, yay…So, how’s Gamblor treating my fellow degenerates this fine eve?
Edit: Just my luck, the one time I actually want to go to bed early and have a long sleep and I get litre’d (for context, I usually get like 2 hours of sleep a night, sometimes less)
How the fuck can you function in 2 hours of sleep or less?
Everytime, I click on a college football box score and think, “no, I won’t be amused by some kid’s name, and I definitely won’t be so amused as make a joke about it on DFO” but then I see Lyn-J Dixon squaring off against Keefe White. I’m only human!
Come on you bastards. Hold on to this point like a stag beetle.
Fuuuuuuuuu….
Hey guys! Did you know Rwanda is open for visitors?!?
And they even take Americans! Talk about low standards…
“Do you have a stump for an arm or leg? You’ll get 50% off on your hotel room fee during our Healing Process Week giveaway!”
The NRA’s long, difficult time without a school massacre ends today with The Citadel/Clemson game.
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
That was a nice attack.
Beautiful delay on the overlapping run.
Sure, your republic is tearing apart at the seams but we’ve got our own issues. #lafleur is trending on Canuck Twitter because the Canadiens forbade Guy to wear their jersey at a charity event.
Sacre bleu!
THIS ARSENAL ATTACK, I CALL IT ‘TOYS FOR TOTS’ BECAUSE THEY KEEP GIVING AWAY BRAND NEW SOCER BALLS!!!
LETS FUCKING GO HAMMERS!!!
Allow me to respond: no.
/Grizzled old hag, examining the discarded bones from a Double Wing Meal (20 pieces for only $21.99!) in the dumpster behind Anchor Bar, last night
The Syracuse football team will take an early lead and then… [takes a closer look] shit the bed in their usual fashion. This is the prophecy foretold! Now leave me alone, these Jalapeno Poppers are still warm!
Right, I think I’m gonna bolt, ’cause I don’t think me raging and whinging like a PMSing Gender Studies Landwhale because of Arsenal will do me any favours… Have a good one lads and lasses, catch y’all later
We’ll happily dance on your grave in absence. Or presence. Don’t think it matters.
You can piss on it for all I care… so long as we win, seriously, tho. I be gone now
Does Crystal Palace have the countenance of a bitch?
Verily, I say Crystal Palace is not that with which you should fuck.
The United Mancunians have surrendered this match as though their collective fear caused them to defile their respective bedclothes.
I don’t understand this. In my defense I’m hotly anticipating the directional pork product match.
weekend reading:
about a rockingdog….
https://www.texasmonthly.com/the-culture/wishbone-oral-history/
Are they doing the Flying Wing-T next week?
ACC Networks sponsors include Genuine Acacia Wood Spatulas, Tactical Flashlights, Salad Bowls, Food Lion(?) Wha?
Tactical toilet paper, tactical soup spoon, and tactical gravy boats. All are related.
It’s about goddamn time America militarized their kitchens!
I actually do have a Tactical Apron. It’s kind of awesome
Pics? With nothing else on of course.
Just the thought of getting pics is making my souffle rise! [shudders]
https://www.amazon.com/ThinkGeek-Tactical-Molle-Apron-Adjustable/dp/B00D08KW3E
Tactical diaper bags
And since you’ve purchased it, I’ll bet that no neo-Stalinists have badgered you while you were making toast. Money well spent!
United pull one back…
And give it right back.
Well, that turn of events can explain why I can hear wifey growl at the TV.. well, that or the rage virus from 28 days 😀
Hi
Unrelated PSA:Lads, pay attention when a game offers you the option to re-install after an update, or you\ll be stuck like unca bk watching how 120 gigs of data sloooooooooooowly (compared to his broadband’s theoretical throughput) trickles through