Your “Can They Possibly Do It Again?” AFC Divisional Round Playoff Game Open Thread

Twas a lovely feel good moment for a fan base that has been kicked in the nads so often for the last quarter century and beyond, really. And to do it against the team that has grinded their hopes down into an ashy paste under their jackboots won’t soon be forgotten. Are they emotionally spent though? For the non-answer to this and other questions, read below…

TO THE GAME!

Browns/Chiefs:

-Hey, good luck to HC Stefanski, coaching his very first playoff game. As far as harbingers of good fortune, I Preifer someone else.

-Chubb should be able to impose his will. He’s had 100 yards from scrimmage the last three games and scored in the last 6 of 7. And that KC run D is nothing to be afeared of.

-Tyreek is all set up to dominate-he has the most deep TD passes caught (8) this year and the Browns have given up the 3rd most (11) long scores. Though they do get back secondary starters in Ward and Johnson. Pro Bowler Bitonio is back to protect his Baker as well.

-Folks rightly point out that the Browns o-line is elite (although 4 dudes are questionable for this one) but t’udder side has allowed only 3 opposing rb’s to run for more than 65 yards this year. So maybe temper your expectations for CEH (also listed as questionable) or Bell or Williams or Thompson.

-“Just Win, Patty!” After a blowout of the Jetskis back in week 8, the Chiefs largest margin of victory was a 6 point trouncing of the Broncos.

-The Rich Get Richer: The Chiefs hit it big in the 4th round of the draft when they landed cb L’Jarius Sneed, who became an instant starter in the secondary and on special teams. Needless to say, when a scouting staff can find gems in later rounds a team’s overall depth improves dramatically.

-You’d think that the Browns would need a defensive turnover or two to keep pace with the opposition but it’s highly unlikely they’ll get the 4 picks that they generated last week-Mahomes has but 6 for the year.

-Sleeping With Bieniemy: The Chiefs OC has been pegged (damn!) by the Eagles as an HC candidate and/or a Rooney Rule checkmark.

Scribble your kibble in the comments.

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clint greasewood

Agree with Cowher and the ball should go back to the offense on the 20 if fumbled forward in the end zone. I bet they change that rule next season.

Dunstan

Honestly even that seems unduly punitive, though it would be a massive improvement. I would just make it offense’s ball from the spot where possession was lost.

It’s not like players are going to start recklessly trying to fumble the ball forward. The risk of the defense recovering before it goes out of bounds is too serious.

Horatio Cornblower

Holy shit, ‘Tough As Nails’ is a real show? I thought that was going to turn into some gag commercial for State Farm or some shit.

Horatio Cornblower

That non-call on the helmet-to-helmet hit causing a fumble and a turnover on a widely reviled rule that cost the lovable underdog a TD would be the sort of thing that would haunt a league capable of shame.

Fortunately that’s not the case here! Now who’s up for a beer!? #Upforwhatever!

blaxabbath

Alright then, I’m moving over to Disenchantment.

Bloody Lethal

I haven’t yet returned since season 1. Worth the binge?

blaxabbath

I’m honestly not sure.

Don T

Inside the KC Death Tent (source: cdc.gov)
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ArmedandHammered

More like slow death by heart disease with the possibility of quick death by stroke.

Horatio Cornblower

Yeah, but bacon.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m willing to bet all of hippo’s pills the browns don’t run this back for a td

Last edited 3 years ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
Bloody Lethal

How I imagine Travis Kelce’s charity efforts look:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SwX6ER5jqp0

Gumbygirl

I think Myles Garrett’s is “Football helmets for East Africa so they can smite the white devils.”

Don T

Now THAT’S a donation envelope I would like to receive.

Spur

where do I donate?

Bloody Lethal

Bringing East Africa the tools they need to succeed.
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Spur
blaxabbath

Big Trav

Horatio Cornblower

Needs more violence.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

*too

LemonJello

Let’s go to our camera inside the Factory of Sadness.
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Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
Gumbygirl

I can smell the Cuyahoga burning from here!

blaxabbath

How can a place with such a beautiful language be so bad at football?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Team owned by white guy instead of Iroquois or Chippewa?

blaxabbath

Well, so long as NFL teams are worth more than a foxskin of firewater….

litre_cola

You would think Cecil Rhodes could chime in on this.

blaxabbath

“This ruling eliminates any chance Cleveland might have BUT butterfingers here got hit in the head so….you know, both sides are the same.”

JimU

The factory of sadness is working overtime today.

Brocky

that’s so disappointing for Cleveland that Tyreek Hill just hit his wife out of sympathy

Doktor Zymm

That was some very brownsy brownsing

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Someone remind me that the Browns weren’t really competitive in this game in the first place.

King Hippo

I was getting ready to predict a win if they went into the break 16-10

blaxabbath

The one time they had a chance was after they won the coin toss.

Then they deferred….

hippofant

Goddamn, Njoku just had to watch the ball spin slowly out of the endzone too. There was nobody else who had a chance to recover it!

Horatio Cornblower

Isn’t it a touchback anyway? The receiver fumbles it through the end zone, so I don’t think it matters if Njoku touched it.

But I don’t even understand what a catch is, so there’s a good chance I’m wrong.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, it would have gone back to the spot of the fumble.

Horatio Cornblower

Oh man, that’s so much worse.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I just watched the replay, Njoku wasn’t dogging it. He was just too far away.

blaxabbath

Can take #thepauls out of Cleveland but you can’t take #thepauls out of #thepauls….

King Hippo

ain’t that the truth

Gumbygirl

That was epically Brownsian!

litre_cola

If JustStopDude was here his laptop would be smashed against the wall right now.

King Hippo

Because when you run as effectively as #ThePauls, 1st and goal inside the 1 is such an unacceptable outcome that you MUST dangle the ball like a loaf of bread.

Horatio Cornblower

Hippo, as a Broncos fan you of all people must understand why no Brown is anxious to see 1st and goal from inside the 3.

Gatoraids

This Factory of Sadness is fully operational

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ah yes, the Derek Carr special. This really *is* like watching the Raiders.

Brocky

not the most browns things ever, but daaaaaaaaaamn

Spur
Horatio Cornblower

Oh Browns, thou hast Browns.

Col. Duke LaCross

Oh fuck!

Dunstan

The dumbest rule in the NFL strikes again!

Mr. Ayo

#ThePauls!

litre_cola

Oh my goodness.

Horatio Cornblower

As Marilyn Monroe once said “Are you sure it’s OK to do this in the Oval Office, Jack?”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[comes running in right before halftime]

“What’d I miss?”

– Beergh

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This is a lot like watching a Raiders game, actually.

If they can just convert this 3rd and 15, and then score a touchdown before halftime, and then score a touchdown in their first drive of the second half, they’ll be back in this!

Horatio Cornblower

Tyreek Hill’s favorite charitable cause is giving battered women and children their start.

Seriously, fuck Tyreek Hill.

Doktor Zymm

The NFL did a stellar job of going back to not even pretending to give a shit after their brief period of faking concern

Viva La Tabula Raza

A head start, to make it sporting.

Gatoraids

Bit short for every type of route where he’s not getting seperation

Horatio Cornblower

He’s way past a dickbag. As far as I can tell he has absolutely no redeeming qualities off the field, and I want nothing more than to see his unconscious, twitching form carted off of it.

Doktor Zymm

It’s really obnoxious that injuries aren’t more karmic, the real shitheads always seem to stay healthy

King Hippo

Very true

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Reminded myself of Cuntler with this one:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=SbyZDq76T74&feature=youtu.be

Dunstan

I’m honestly surprised that I have not started singing “Scoop! There it is!” every time I have ice cream now.

Last edited 3 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
Doktor Zymm

If they were selling ice cream that would be a very effective commercial

Horatio Cornblower

I actually didn’t edit this, I just hit it accidentally while trying to edit my own.

But I absolutely did think about having Dunstan say something horribly racist about ice cream, because I am a terrible person.

Dunstan

As a fellow terrible person, I forgive you.

clint greasewood

French vanilla, rocky road, chocolate, peanut butter, cookie dough!

Mr. Ayo

Sprinkles!

Horatio Cornblower

I once took a hit like that, (catch a pass, turn around, get walloped by a bigger guy with a head of steam), playing backyard football and I was absolutely not OK afterwards.

Last edited 3 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
King Hippo

Gimpy Mahomes = Bills in the Owl

clint greasewood

Please let me have this.

Doktor Zymm

Healing time on a sprained toe probably isn’t that long, although he’s not exactly resting it

Horatio Cornblower

They’ll shoot that toe full of so many painkillers he won’t know it even exists.

Spur

no way Mahomes can get all that hair under the leather hood.
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Gumbygirl

Here’s my Jim Nantz theory: He desperately wants people to call him Big Jim, or Jimbo, but no one ever does. Sad!

Doktor Zymm

Jimbaroni! Slim Jim! Jimmy John’s! Jimarino!

Horatio Cornblower

Dammit, now all I want is for Romo to all Nantz ‘Jimarino’ just once.

litre_cola

Jeeeeeem isn’t enough for you people??? – P. Simms

blaxabbath

Hearing Jim broadcast Goodell’s planned movements, I’m really upset the Proud Boys stopped following the NFL.

clint greasewood

Games like this happen when the #3 seed ends up being such frauds.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I should probably turn this off if I don’t want to spend the rest of the afternoon angry at everything.

blaxabbath

“Now we go to our satellite feed to discuss with former coach Hue Jackson about what happened today…”

litre_cola

You on an Irish Onlyfans page?

Horatio Cornblower

You can’t expect someone to run with Tyreek Hill, but you can’t be surprised when his family runs from him.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m OK with Goodell not wearing a mask. In a leper colony. In the malaria belt.

Horatio Cornblower

If I were the Browns coach I would tell my receivers to stop dropping passes.

Don T

Chubb wanted no part on that pass. How uncommon.