Welcome, welcome friends and neighbors.
It’s Sunday morning and not quite the NFL season so you know what that means!
Gravy Time!
Oh shit, oh dear, kids have we got a fucking beauty today.
While it is indeed one of those “2.0” things I mentioned last week, there is something outright fucking magical about this bastard.
We’re going back to making Soondubu – “Korea’s spicy tofu stew!” as our Universal Yums snack box guidebook calls it but I’m bringing some pretty fundamental variations when compared to the way we prepared it previously.
When we made this dish a few short weeks ago something happened in my brain. It fucking short circuited. That dish was really, REALLY fucking tasty but I just could not let it go.
At the end of that post I mentioned possibly trying a few alterations to the original and suggested a few ideas. Once I wrote that I could not stop thinking about it..
I became obsessed.
That base of the stew was so fucking good that I just had to give it another go.
People…
Holy shit am I ever glad I went back to the well.
The big time Hollywood Star in this remake is this here motherfucker.
Ladies and gentlemen THAT is pork belly.
Never cooked it before. Ate it a fucking bunch yet it somehow slipped past the goalie and I was negligent in my proper gravy making duties.
I feel shame.
That shit changes today!
Maybe I should clarify, the belly actually takes about three days to prepare it properly.
Original idea/concept for this version is via the incomparable David Chang from Momofuku restaurants.
While researching I found out that pork belly will sometimes be sold skin-on, this one is skinless. If you purchase the skin-on variety simply make some scores across the skin-side using a knife. Not too deep though. Create a diamond pattern prior to applying the rub. Since ours is skinless we can skip that step.
We begin.
On the first day of pork belly we create a simple rub.
This will be applied to our roughly one pound pork belly.
Equal parts kosher salt and sugar, say about 2 teaspoons of each then a few grinds of black pepper.
That’s it.
Rub that belly!
Place in an airtight container and into the fridge it goes for the first of two overnight rests.
On the second day of pork belly we cook that fucker up.
This entire prep in done in the oven. Recipe calls for a heavy bottom cooking device. If you don’t have cast iron – first of all fix that shit – then you may use a roasting pan. Do keep in mind there will be much rendering of fatty substances while cooking.
Firstly preheat the oven to 450. The total cook time for the pork will be 90 minutes. Put the skillet with the pork fat side up into the oven for 30 minutes, then reduce the heat to 275 and cook for an additional hour.
Yielding…
Help me Lawd!
We are NOT, however, ready to serve. This is still only day 2 after all.
Remove the pork from the pan and let it cool to room temperature.
Wrap it tightly in plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight. Yes AGAIN!
That edge facing the camera was the part where I sliced off a small slice for, you know, SCIENCE reasons.
We’ll get to the final step in a moment.
Finally on Day 3 it’s time to prepare our tofu stew.
Remember the base of the stew:
SOONDUBU 2.0!
4 green onions sliced thin and separated into green parts and white parts
4 tablespoons of sesame oil
6 cloves of garlic – minced
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon* of gochugaru – first variation
2 1/2 cups of chicken stock – variation 2
2 tablespoons of soy sauce
2 tablespoons of fish sauce
1 14oz package of “FIRM” tofu – variation 3
2 eggs.
Plus additional items for serving – you’ll see
About that tofu.
See that label there? This time I used a “firm” tofu rather than the “silken” variety. The silken version was a little too soft for my taste. I wanted to firm up that texture.
Yep, it’s still tofu after all and you still need to press the water out.
Get creative again. I used a plate and a heavy bowl placed on top of the tofu. Let this press for say 30-45 minutes to extract the water. I ended up changing the paper towels the tofu is draining on when they became too saturated with water.
Yet ANOTHER variation from our first rodeo is the addition of…
Hell yes. Shiitake mushrooms. They will add earthiness, a good chew and the downright funk that shiitake mushrooms are known for.
I’m all about that funk, Boss!
As mentioned, rather than using water this time we will be using chicken stock. The homemade gourmet shit!
Remember when we made the oven fried chicken and I fucked around and made some homemade stock with the leftover chicken bones and such?
This would be that.
We’ll measure the stock out and use it to replace the water that we used in the initial preparation.
Oh man! Look at the schmaltz!
The base for the rest of the stew follows the same process as the original version.
First with the green onion.
Slice pretty fine and separate the green parts from the white parts.
Go on now, mince up that garlic too!
Once again we start the stew with the blessing/anointing and pouring of the sesame oil.
Medium size stock pan will work just fine.
Add in the green onion parts and the gochugaru.
Cook down for about 5-6 minutes until VERY goddamn fragrant.
The stew will once again feature these two rascals.
Get them in the pot along with the minced garlic and the chicken stock and bring to a boil.
Cook for 4-5 minutes.
The tofu has been pressed so slice it up.
See the difference in the firmness compared to the silken?
Once the stew has cooked for a couple of minutes add in the mushrooms.
These will cook through and reduce in size after a few minutes.
Now finally we can take the pork belly out of the fridge.
There was one final yet pretty significant change from the original soondubu recipe but not to the stew itself.
We used a different delivery method.
I served the stew over noodles instead of rice.
Yes, I am fully fucking aware that soba noodles are Japanese and not Korean. No, I don’t give a single shit.
I chose soba noodles rather than udon because I like the firmer and chewier texture that the buckwheat in the soba provides. Also I was afraid the texture of the tofu would be too similar to the texture of the udon.
Soba noodles it is.
Speaking of the tofu let’s give it a swim.
See how much the mushrooms have cooked down and been incorporated in the stew?
Looks like we’re almost ready.
A slight dusting of some more gochugaru – you know, for color.
One last step before we serve.
The one we’ve been waiting for.
Look at the fat lines! My god.
You’ve got to slice this thick. If you sliced this too thin it would just fall right the fuck apart.
Into a pan it goes.
Just like bacon you won’t need to add any fat to the pan to cook. This more than brings enough of its own.
Just a couple of minutes per side.
Cook it all and remove to a plate.
Alright. You can have one piece. ONE!
Final check on the stew.
Remember how we finished the stew last time?
Hell yes. Crack a couple of eggy-weggs in there.
Heat up your noodles.
I just added 1/2 cup of water to the noodles and nuked them for 3 minutes. This is like a fresh version of the dried top ramen and it even comes with a flavor pack.
Fuck that! I brought my own flavor pack motherfucker!
It plates up a little something like this…
Noodles in a bowl, then…
Couple of slices of belly on top. See how the pork looks almost like a well prepared brisket with the layer of fatty goodness in there? Holy shit!
Next just ladle the stew on top and garnish with the green parts of the onion.
Where to begin? Tofu firmness is close to perfect. The savory, woodsy element with the mushrooms and the chew they bring? Check.
You can feel free to call my ass a wimp for backing down on the gochugaru and it won’t hurt my feelings any. The 4 (four!) tablespoons called for in the original recipe in the guidebook was insanity. We should check with Commentist Dunstan for his take on the quantity of the gochugaru. The 1 tablespoon plus that I used today brought a solid level of heat while maintaining a perfect balance with the plethora of alterations in this iteration.
The chewy soba noodles combined with the perfect balance of the broth allows for maximum slurpability.
Slurp away good people, just keep a napkin on hand in case it splashes in your eye.
Oh yeah, the pork belly.
.
..
…
Perfection. ACHIEVED!
The pork was so soft it didn’t require cutting. It became yet another element in the total package. It had just the right amount of salt, while carrying just a slight sweetness from the sugar. The fat dissolved right into the stew giving it a richness and unctuousness that was stupefyingly delicious.
The total balance of this dish was insane.
This dish made me so goddamn happy I almost did the happy dance.
Not just for eating something flat-out fucking delicious but for providing me indisputable validation.
My ideas at the end of the narrative on the first version of this dish not only worked, they turned out even better than I hoped they would.
/wipes tear
Goddammit I really DO know what the fuck I’m doing in the kitchen!
This is a proud day. Not to mention a ridiculously delicious meal.
Feel free to use that pork belly preparation any fucking way you want to. Trust me. I will be doing the same. Holy shit was that incredible.
Thanks as always for playing along folks. Most of all thanks for allowing me to turn my rambling thoughts and ideas into a very tasty reality.
WOO!
See you next Sunday everyone.
Football soon come!
Be Safe.
Be Well.
PEACE!
sunday TIPPIN’ & ROCKIN’
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wRJxLqcbdg
I’m watching the Sevilla-Rayo Vallecano game and there’s an ad on the side boards that says “Visit NAGA.COM” and I keep reading it as “NALGA.COM” and now I want to go to nalga.com but I’m afraid of what I will find there…
Turns out it’s not being used. I may need to bring this up to the DFO Corporation as an investment opportunity…
At least it didn’t advertise MAGA.COM
Pretty much.
Since I’m applying to Instacart, I figured I should try out their service. Ordered a bunch of stuff from H-mart, and since it is kind of difficult to compare packaging online I ended up ordering three different types of those fried tofu-skin pouches, like for inari sushi. Turns out it’s also difficult to gauge package size online, and one of those packages is HUGE. I am going to be eating everything stuffed into a tofu pouch this week.
Seems like an excellent point to bring up in interviews!
Nah just kidding — they don’t care. They just need to keep in running as-is…..unless I’m wrong.
And this is bad because?
Not bad at all! Just means I will have to slightly modify my cooking plans for the week
Gotta go!
Every time I hear CBD mentioned, I think of this girl from my high school who now just homeschools her like seven kids and runs one of those little CBD businesses. All her online posts are about either whatever is up with her kids or why you should buy her “C [Bee Emoji] D” and this post will forever come to mind in every single situation:
DFO: Come for the Korean stew recipes, stay for the foreign policy analysis and dick jokes.
Don’t forget the cunnilingus jokes!
This Carolina Colts game is worse than anything I got to see yesterday. Holy hell.
Big thunderstorms and rain has knocked down my satellite signal. Darn.
Fuck, I just realized that all the issues that happened with the NBA’s reintroduction of fans during the playoffs are going to occur tenfold with the NFL. Throw together a bunch of drunken jackasses who have forgotten how to behave like human beings, what’s the worst that could happen?
It would be nice if the NFL did different sections for vaxxed and plaguerats
I object to the implication that Raiders fans (present company excluded) ever knew how to behave like human beings.
How do you think they make it through the unemployment benefits process though?
Welfare, unemployment requires you to have had a job at some point in the recent past
Viva’s supply guy left him a hit of MDMA, suggesting I might enjoy it. After several months of procrastination, the medicine has finally been ingested. Let’s see what happens!
Not sure a Sunday afternoon is the ideal scenario, but it’s not like you’ll have a bad time or anything. It’s a fun drug!
Oh it is super fun. Depends what it was cut with on how your day will be tomorrow.
Enjoy!
That’s something I’ve never tried. I’m interested in your report, Sky Captain!
thats ROCKING!
BOTG!
Well, I’ve been holding on to that for couple months, maybe the stuff has a shelf life. I got a nice real mild buzz, a feeling of pleasant complacence, and then slept through the rest of the ball game. Guess I will act faster next time he leaves one with me…
Which will be before Vegas DFO Con 2021!
Hm, now that my BA flight has officially been nixed, I have to make a decision. I’ve already decided that it’s best to fly out of Kyiv directly, since adding an additional country entry is madness nowadays, but do I go for the cheap business class flight on Qatar, which has probably the best business class product out there today, the cheap business class flight on Austrian, which is overall less pleasant and leaves at a stupid time, but will get me 1k status on United, or do I book a 3-stop points flight on United, which is both the cheapest and least pleasant option?
You know you want the Qatar, and I am willing to be your enabler. Go for the luxury, life is brutish and short.
Actually, I found a much better Austrian flight, plus the return is on a Lufthansa 747 so I can fly in the upper deck before all the 747s are retired! It’s the best of both worlds!
Broom sighting
Today’s Options
A: Stay here, watch football and make dumb jokes.
B: Pay for all the food for MIL’s birthday BBQ, stay there for 4 hours.
C: Take warm bath, lock the door, take a rusty serrated knife to wrist and go to town.
I vote A, for your sanity
In reality there are no ‘options’, there are only obligations today. Fuck me.
Me too. We have to go make nice with the fam in Riverside. Do I wanna? Nope. Do I hafta? Yup.
May be a good time to come down with a case of “explosive diarrhea and uncontrollable projectile vomiting.”
The kids are leaving for college, so we won’t see them until Thanksgiving. I’m just kvetching about the drive!
Andy Reid is leaning towards B, but thinks 4 hours isn’t enough time.
From the AP:
U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken rejected comparisons to the U.S. pullout from Vietnam, as many watched in disbelief at the sight of helicopters landing in the embassy compound to take diplomats to a new outpost at Kabul International Airport.
“This is manifestly not Saigon,” he said on ABC’s “This Week.”
How, exactly?
Saigon pullout had better music?
Saigon Pullout would be a cool band name.
I can’t imagine this evacuation being able to produce a more iconic photo than the helo hovering over the US Embassy in Saigon.
Because the local troops in Vietnam actually put more than 0% effort into defending their own capital city.
Don’t get me wrong, what’s happening there is awful. But the only way it would have been less awful is if it had happened 15, 10, or even 5 years ago.
I don’t know which group of people I’m more disgusted with:
I saw some dickhead saying “if the U.S. just kept 2500 troops there on a more or less permanent basis, things would remain well under control”. As if that’s all it would take, and for some reason no other country has the slightest interest in doing exactly that.
Yes. The only thing we did wrong here, besides going in in the first place, is leaving them any weaponry. The “security forces” we spent billions equipping and training never had any intention to do anything other than turn that shit over to the Taliban. That’s what they want, that’s what they get.
Let me rephrase that, we did many things wrong, but leaving them all of those goodies was a huuuuuge mistake.
The fact that Pompeo and Trump negotiated a 3 month cease fire with the Taliban last year in exchange for the release of 5000 Taliban being held in prison, and the fact that those 5000 Taliban (and others, no doubt) are now just finishing up their reconquest of the country, will probably be largely overlooked by the MSM. But America doesn’t negotiate with terrorists.
I deployed to Kabul in 2007 and also worked the reconstruction effort from here in the states for a couple years, and I’m sad to see this happen, but I could tell even back in the late 00’s that our effort was unsustainable. Biden is just ripping the bandaid off on a hopeless situation.
Looking at our history, our enemies in these kinds of situations are usually driven by ideology, while our allies are usually driven by greed and their desire to steal as much money from the US as possible while the getting is good. Love me some Swiss bank accounts.
Yeah, for me the question of whether it was or is theoretically possible to succeed in Afghanistan is perhaps an interesting thing for foreign policy and military scholars to study in the future, but it’s blindingly obvious that the present U.S. foreign policy and military establishments have had no idea how to do it for 20 years despite claiming otherwise, and therefore almost certainly have no idea how to do it now.
Statement from President Biden
Shit, give me a minute
.
I was there in 2005, my unit was taking the first stab at training the ANA units (Kandaks) who were older than 3 years and were losing most of thier initial volunteers. The units cadre, the remaing officers and NCO were very weak. I had a bad vibe but hoped time, and the next generation would break the hold of brutal tribalism. No way. And too many that I knew gone. This is exactly Saigon ’75.
’04 – ’05 here! It was apparent then that there was no foreign mission to “win” because we were just dicking off spinning our tires and the real mission was simply funneling money to the military-industrial complex (yeah, the one Eisenhower warned us about).
Pulling off the Band-Aid is the perfect explanation for this.
Opinion: It is impossible to own too many bathrobes
Counterpoint: Terrycloth – no. Silk – yes.
Counter-Counterpoint: I’ll take TerryMcLaurincloth in the third round of the Bathrobe Fantasy Draft.
Did you ever own one of those VS “cloudspun” robes? I bought one for a girlfriend and have never seen them for sale since.
No, but that sounds intriguing. I assume they are not spun from actual clouds, since that would just be cold and damp
I remember the fabric as being incredibly soft. Not sure why they stopped selling them – maybe it didn’t hold up for more than a wash or two?
This has been very entertaining. If Spurs had Kane I think they would have had one with Son NAWT crossing to anyone else.
Guess that’s why he ain’t crossing
found a funny;
https://nestflix.fun/
so happy someone did this
really curious to see if Milf Island gets renewed for another season
STEPHEN A: Skip I want to ADDRESS this issue.
[BAYLESS nods]
You KNOW I think this is magnificent.
BAYLESS: Absolutely
STEPHEN A: BUT!
(it’s terrific but I’m seeing a distinct lack of films from “The Critic”)
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Sj0J7U3VI4I
That is a great site!
Ah shoot, I forgot I’m supposed to do a take home test for job application stuff today. So annoying. I will do it later, Civ first.
Fucking hate those. Whoever thought tests for job applications need to be beaten with a tire iron
It kinda makes sense for data science, but it’s a huge pain in the butt. I much prefer the live coding exercises.
As always, this looks amazing! I’m sure you saved the fat that was rendered from Porky’s belly. I would be frying eggs in it right now, if only I had some [sobs]
lol
me reading this recipe
https://twitter.com/eliistender10/status/1425882449343664130
That pork belly.. I may need to go out for fancy ramen today
Or go to H-mart, or both!
Ah yes, the little-known predecessor to S-Mart
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TEKN-NHg6Rk
Damn that looks great.
I rubbed my belly the whole time I was reading this
#MeToo, if you mean penis by belly
Same general area
So there’s a banner ad on Jalopnik for the Tottenham vs Man City tilt. Pictured are two players, one of whom looks to be of Asian extraction, and the other looks like a youthful version former star cricketer and current Top Gear host Freddy Flintoff.
I mean, I’m sure that minute amount of gochugang is fine if you want a balanced dish. It’s just that for me, when I want a Korean stew, I don’t want a balanced mingling of flavors, I want the heat and garlic to blow me away like that guy sitting in front of his speakers in that old ad.
I like the 2.0 concept. I’m too lazy to look up who supposedly said that great writing isn’t written, it’s re-written, but I think the same thing applies to recipes. Few dishes are great the first time around; some tinkering and adjusting is almost always good.
Hammers Awake!
Pork belly is a top notch item.
Tofu….I dunno, still seems kind of gross.
Matter of preference. I prefer the silken in stews like this, while yeah right prefers the firm, and maybe you prefer nada! I wouldn’t totally give up on it until you’ve had fried tofu though, that stuff is great. The point of tofu is mostly to suck up the flavor of what’s around it while providing some protein, so you also can try different textures in different flavor bases.
I think my problem is that the only tofu I enjoy is the fried stuff which, in general, defeats the purpose of me having tofu (“It’s a healthier option that some people find even more flavorful than meat!” – Some Asshole at Sprouts Who Needs to get Fozzed by JJFozz).
But that extends to pretty much everything in my diet (ie, deep fried churros).
Now that the US has bailed on the multigeneratiomal quagmires of the War on Drugs and War in Afghanistan, we can devote our time and resources to the never-ending War on Covid.
How the hell is newly-acquired Areola behind Fabianski, and where the hell did Lingardinho end up?
Hope you’re not too sore to properly enjoy this BananaPuddings
Neck’s a bit stiff, but success was achieved! My first long-term girlfriend forbade such activity, so since then I’m like foraging hedgehog 🤓.
You are a hero, good sir. Forage away!
I had forgotten how much garlic is used in Korean dishes. This goes on the list, thanks.
Well they haven’t quite figured out if they’re Chinese or Japanese…
YUM!
Speaking of pork, good luck to DFO’s favoUrite cunning linguist this morning, as the Hammers take on the wretched Barcodes.
Fronk would reply but his tongue stopped working hours ago.
That man will not give up looking for the man in the boat. He is like the coast guard out there.
GPS would sure help smh