As I mentioned in the Sexy Friday post a couple of weeks back, God Bless Mr. Ayo and his penis! Thanks to his hard (no I’m not sorry) work, I have a bounty of amazing pictures to share with you today.
Therefore, today’s Sexy Friday features 25 (not 11) pics that Mr. Ayo and friends have posted in the last two weeks.
On to Balls’ Thoughts O’ Da Week!
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Balls’ AFL Finals Preview
By the time you read this, Geelong will have either beaten Port Adelaide in Adelaide to get to the Preliminary Final or will have lost embarrassingly and will now face the winner of the GWS-Sydney game.
Update:
For the record, I think that will be the best game of the weekend. It doesn’t get any better than two city rivals playing each other in an Elimination Final. I have a feeling that GWS will win and I’m sorry if that ends up jinxing them. At least a certain tWBS-hating Nazi (who tWBS insists from the grave to this day that he never banged) will be happy.
I still say he banged her.
The other Elimination Final is Essendon v Western and I think the Bombers take this one. The Doggies are a shell of their former selves and should make a quick exit.
The Bombers would then face the loser of Melbourne-Brisbane and that should be another outstanding game. I think the Lions win it meaning Melbourne plays Essendon next week.
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Recommended Viewing
So how did everyone like the season premiere of Archer last Wednesday? I haven’t seen it yet, but I’ve heard good things. If anyone saw it, please chime in below.
Update: Two words: Anal Bullets!
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For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.
Here are your pictures of the week.
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YOU’RE-A-PRUDE
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And now, for the music!
As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!
Today we are back to the puzzles! No one got last week’s puzzle, so I’m replaying it. Here is your first hint: Play the Just Feels Tight video!
As always, I will give up to three hints in the comments at your request. You try to determine the hidden theme or link between all the songs. Good luck!
Song Number One:
Canción Número Dos:
Chanson Numéro Trois:
Canzone numero quattro:
Canção número cinco
Seigarren zenbakia:
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That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and fly low and avoid the radar.
Rewatching The Mindy Project. It just got to that part where Danny kissed Mindy for the first time. Oh, those feelis!
As a lifelong dungeon master I have to officially lower my constitution to 9.
I can’t control this.
The game is the game.
I heard there would be snacks.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWOFtixfies
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQ5vv4c8oW8
A friend of mine from college got to sit in with this band on the drums! And he only started playing the drums in college too!
I hate to poop the party, but this dog is an early riser!
My son had a ginormous talking Big Bird when he was a kid ( like a Teddy Ruxpin.) It was even creepier than this thing!
Big Bird being creepy makes me sad
This may be a Johnny Cash remake but something gets lost in translation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mV_HHL-h6g
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Hello folks!
As of right now this here motherfucker is on vacation until Thursday morning at 10:30.
Let’s have a drink shall we?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WccfbPQNMbg
Cheers!
Got to admit Dok, I’m still awkward with the plane protocols.
I haven’t flown since 2019.
I am interested in your best air tavel tips.
I am Jack’s crippling anxiety.
Long Beach to Denver Monday morning.
Actually on the plane you are good, window seat towards the front if you can, worth paying extra for closer to the front – the exact tradeoffs depend on the airline and personal risk tolerances, but sometimes first class can be worth it, sometimes no.
Getting to the airport – The best option if you can is to have one person already in your bubble drop you off. Otherwise, it is airport parking (short ride, but potential for multiple people) v. rideshare, (one person but longer exposure). If you already have precheck or can get it quickly, it’s worth it, you avoid loads of people in lines and get through security in 5ish minutes. If you can do that, don’t arrive at the airport more than an hour before your flight. If not, try 90 minutes.
At the airport – Don’t hang out near the gate, find your own spot. Try to only have an under the seat carry-on, then board last. The boarding process is never socially distanced, so let the crowd do their thing then go.
Why not the N-95? It’s perfectly comfortable for <8 hours. Probably don’t need to do a face shield, but if you want the extra security than do it. No one will look askance at you. Go full PPE if you want. Armor up with the max you are comfortable with.
On arrival, debarking isn’t bad, but again, this is where sitting towards the front really helps. Renting a car is a clean, no contact option. The big rental places will let you submit info beforehand and won’t require human interaction. Otherwise, just keep your mask on and do a rideshare/taxi.
Hotels are zero issue, just don’t snort the remote when it’s out of the “clean” bag.
There will be moments when you are in close contact with strangers, but those moments can be quick if you plan right, and they are with people who have pledged they don’t have symptoms or exposure. Yes people are shit and will lie, but that’s the minority, and the few documented cases don’t have associated transmissions.
Excellent!
I have an N-95, the real deal that my work gave me because they were the only major corporation who was PREPARED FOR A FUCKING GLOBAL PANDEMIC!
I haven’t worn it since I got it because these things are dear and shit, if I already didn’t color a moustache on it I would give it to the amazing health care workers.
I have an N-95!
Is what I guess I’m saying.
They are way easier to get nowadays, so don’t feel guilty for not passing it on 🙂
Actual itinerary is me, drive to Long Beach, park at the airport, I can park in Lot B for 17 bucks a day.
I like to travel quick and with no driving needed so I’m taking Metro rail from Denver airport to Union Station Downtown Denver. I’m staying at the Westin Union Station and the shuttle bus to Red Rocks loads at,,,
Union Station.
Tuesday drink and eat well, back on the Metro to Denver land In Long Beach, grab my dirty ass hooptie and drive over the Vincent Thomas Bridge and home to glory.
And a tasty bottle of red.
I can do this.
Yeah, you got the important bits figured. All that is low exposure, and quick, so totally non-issue with the N-95. And eating drinking? Do it when you’re comfortable. I’ve had lots of cookies breathe on me, have travelled probably 70k BIS miles in 2021, and nothing diagnosable even before my vaxx. Delta is a thing, and a serious thing, but so is vaccination rate. Yes, there’s a risk, but that’s no reason to do nothing. Minimize the risk, enjoy yourself.
It’s mostly the 10,000 people screaming full throttle and I’ve already reached decorum on the joint passing thing.
It’s RIGHT OUT!
I’ve got edibles
Hell, that is what you go for. I can give tips for getting there and back safe, but at the place? All on you, they’re probably good, abd vax requirements are awesome, but plague doctor costumes are also always cool
I miss live music so much and I chose this band – still not favorite favorite band but on the stage? One of Hands Down best live shows ever.
And at Red Rocks?
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They played in Inglewood! 2 miles from where I work! a week ago.
I chose this band and this venue for this exact experience.
This is holy ground.
Correction: I’m staying Tuesday night and coming home Wednesday at noon.
Fuck yeah!
I just took a hit off my vape! Woooooooohooooo!
Think I’ll join you.
Glad to see you join us!
Go hard.
Its raining out = no morning run. So whoever is around here is stuck with me. Wuzzup?
I’m learning about the guy who was probably goatse, then figuring out if I can go ice skating this weekend since it is a heatwave and I enjoy cool air while glaring at talented children and enjoying moderate exercise.
Also known as living your best life.
I’m tapping out and going to bed, wake me if there’s an earthquake east of Utah.
What with Earth being a sphere and all, everywhere is east of everywhere else.
Fuck, I miss being a smart ass and enjoying it. Where is the joy in the dumb shit I learn nowadays?
So if your butthole is cool?………
I’m walking tomorrow but all I have to deal with is 80 degrees and a goddamn Santa Ana.
It’s really weird, I’m staying in Riverside for a few days while my sisters in.law take their kids to college. Last night I walked the dog and the smoke was terrible, I could barely breathe or see. I woke up this morning to blue skies, no smell of smoke at all. I can see stars tonight.
Text book Santa Ana, that’s where when you walk on the beach there’s a cloud of smoke between here and Catalina.
My alarmist brain says 20 years MAX before that shit sweeps down on the basin.
Shit!
Happy thoughts.
Happy!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhN8SdulOFc
I wonder whatever happened to the original goatse?
https://www.gawker.com/finding-goatse-the-mystery-man-behind-the-most-disturb-5899787
The things you learn…
Not clicking
smart man
It’s text, you’ll be fine.
Yeah but with that picture now burned in your mind…
If you’ve seen it, you’ve seen it. Tempted to try some ASCII art, but also lazy
I’m more bothered that he’s that thin.
Despite his large intestinal surface area, he’s not absorbing any nutrients from stuff that comes in from the back
Weird bittersweetness at work today. Kinda weird but it’s the last time I’ll be there on a weekday. Been at the job forever. Said by to people who don’t work weekends
Whatever, here’s some wrestlers trying to look like porn stars
“Wrestlers looking like porn stars? I’m gonna just pretend I didn’t see that.” – Jim Jordan
Where did everyone go? I have two interview take home assignments this weekend, plus there’s a heatwave, so gotta live it up tonight by drinking, playing Civ, and talking to imaginary internet people tonight!
I’m here, though we’re probably going to watch an episode of Ted Lasso and go to sleep early.
You just got back from Chicago….have you ever been to Boqueria on Fulton? How’s their outdoor space?
Haven’t been, but have heard good things. No absence of nice outdoor spaces in Chi though, as you know. You’re welcome to be sweaty and overheated while you eat and drink in many a place
I hated interview take home assignments. I had one for a vendor risk assessment and they ghosted me after. I have a feeling they used me for free assessing. Assholes.
That’s why you should always put a flaw in your take home interview assignments, something like a fatal underestimate of a beam’s load bearing capability.
They are unfortunately par for the course with data science. I really ought to pretend I’m a new grad and actually give a shit, rather than knowing they’re total bullshit unrelated to actual work, but my attitude has grown darker and darker over the years.
You want to do a third?
I’ll do a fifth. Or a third, whatever.
I’m currently drinking this beer. It’s aight.
Yuzu Hazy Gose by 300 Suns Brewing on Untappd https://untp.beer/YEX7L
So….we’re gonna end up going back into Afghanistan by the end of the year, right?
I don’t have any ice, but I DO have a big ol’ bag of frozen peaches that should nicely cool off my gin
Frozen fruit as ice is severely underrated
Very true. Especially when compared to frozen vegetables! I wonder how that dude is doing? I know he got divorced and got in some sort of fight with my dude, but that was a few years back, he’s either dead or in recovery now, since that’s how severe coke problems tend to work.
I feel like the only frozen vegetable that would work is a cucumber chunk in a pour of Hendricks. But even that doesn’t make much sense.
Frozen peas are apparently the best, as they cool well and don’t impart flavor to the drink, unlike frozen corn. They are all a fucking mess when they are left in glasses the next day
No! Peaches bring pain!
I also have a bag of frozen mixed berries, I will use those next time, or include a trigger warning on the stone fruit
After work we all went to a brewery that is behind a warehouse. You have to know about or google search it, as it has no signs anywhere. Got some kind of apricot sour beer. Was going to have just one, but doubled up that number. What a great way to start the weekend, though.
Here’s another submarine story. I hope these don’t bore you.
This is the “plastic cow” story.
Before we went on a 40 day patrol (and I did six patrols) we had huge a load-out of stores. Perishable goods were consumed first, because they weren’t going to last.
But the fresh milk was strangely a big deal in the U.S. Navy, at least on my boat it was.
When the fresh milk supply was exhausted, the word would go out immediately through every interior communications circuit that “the cow died,” and that we had powdered milk on the mess decks, which was known as “plastic cow.”
Our cooks, who were highly trained would get so frustrated at this. “It’s the same thing” they would scream, and they were right, but that wasn’t the point. It was a crew tradition that we would not drink plastic cow.
Now you could take some and put it in your coffee or on your breakfast cereal flakes, but don’t ever be seen drinking a glass of it. That was a violation of the unwritten fraternal crew rules.
(Some kind of exoticly) pasteurized milk is shelf stable, until it’s opened, people forget that.
I love how California is painted as this nightmarish hellscape, meanwhile I can step out to walk the dog and find half a dozen delicious passionfruits a short distance from my front door.
Shhh. You keep telling people this shit, more people will move here.
I mean, DFOers, fine, though it will be hard on the liquor supplies. But not everyone else!
All my non-California friends and family are constantly asking me about the wildfire smoke. Have we had any? I haven’t noticed. But they all seem convinced that we’re choking on it.
Glad to help!
Hi there, Meredith Hagner
“What an incredible outfit!” — Jay Leno
Dumplings have been ordered, and should be here right around the time I finish this Negroni.
We tried making passionfruit moscow mules. They’re just meh.
Passionfruit margaritas, then?
Shouldn’t dumple be a verb and the present tense be dumpling?
Yes?
Speaking of sexy, the samples for the virtual scotch tasting arrived today! The package smelled amazing. Number 1 will be the expensive one since we get a shorter pour on that one, but no idea on the others.
If i had a quarter for every time I was told my package smelled amazing, I’d have about fifty cents.
Uh yeah all of my bottles arrived empty? Can I get a refill–I mean resend?
I don’t know when I’ll be able to watch GWS-Sydney, so NO SPOILERS
@balls any idea if the AFL playoff games are going to be broadcast here?
10:00 tonight is the GWS-Sydney game and it’s on FS2!
The Brisbane-Melbourne game starts at 2:30 AM and its on FS1!
Tomorrow night’s Essendon-Western game starts at 10:00 pm on FS2!
FUCK YEAH! THANKS!
We collected FIVE passionfruits today while walking the dog. In honor of this momentous find we’re going to have passionfruit Moscow Mules.
If being passionate about mules is your life choice, you might need the Dr Mrs near in case of any accidents..
Me, inspecting the collection of today’s photographs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=maWr9sw80a4
“And he’s really looking. “
My father in law wants to order Chinese food for dinner. The restaurant he likes is fucking horrible, and it’s not even 6pm. Kill me now.
I’m going to order in tonight, too, but haven’t decided what yet. Maybe Thai?
If there isn’t a Spanish-Thai fusion food truck out there somewhere called Muy Thai then I don’t know if I want to live in this world much longer.
Remember – if you love somebody, set them ON FIRE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zlyvcti3kQU
Watching a show about a science fiction place called “Britain” in the distant future called “Post WWII” and there’s a plot about women leaving the home and working! What a concept!
Ha, that’s crazy! A country like that is likely to wind up with women running the place!
Christ on a crutch, next you know they’ll be asking to vote!
Just started a cocktail called Naked and Famous. It turns out that you are NOT what you drink.
Is there a drink called a white Mexican? I might disprove your theory if there is.
Isn’t that Kahlua, milk, and vodka?
White Russian oddly enough. Given that Kahlua is Mexican I believe
There must be — probably a White Russian variant using tequila or mezcal instead of vodka
I’d say you have enough of them, you’d be half right.
Half white, you mean.