I missed you, Mama Football.

Yes, the Bills stepped repeatedly and forcefully on their own genitals and Rapey Jameis looked like the Second Coming. But it’s still a lovely week in the neighborhood.

Not much on the NFL Front. Usually Tuesday is when we take a breath and count the human cost of the prior week’s games. The Ravens are auditioning fans to play both offensive line and cornerback. Old Man Fitzpatrick breaking a hip (sorta). Raheem “Colonel” Mostert is ded for the season. Still, compared with most Week 1s, not a whole lot of major casualties.

Baseball continues to be baseball, although the Blue Jays and Cardinals are making their wild card runs while the Yankees are providing some evidence of a kind and loving God by rolling in their own filth.

I apologize if I missed some late-breaking news (“Rodgers Benched For Love; LaFleur Blames Shailene Woodley”). I am currently at an SCCA Track Day, tearing ass in a non-competitive “high performance drivers education” event. I highly recommend these things- there’s probably some going on near you. Refreshes the soul.

Tonight’s Obscure Movie: Necessary Roughness, starring Sir Scott of Bakula and Not-Shazam Sinbad. Kathy Ireland in her prime as the placekicker and the ageless Robert Loggia. Wait, I’m being told Robert Loggia is NOT Ageless, but in fact Dead. Woops.

It’s a second-tier football comedy, but worth your time. Also, the genesis of Rob Schneider’s “Fumbalaya! Fumbleruski!” bit.