Your Thursday Night Football Open Thread

I apologize for the tardiness of this post but a tortuous hiking trail waits for No Man! And I am No Man! hmm that sounded better in my head I should grab one of them thar GoPros and show you what I do. But then I thought, ‘meh, the vast majority of commenters already have vids of sweaty old men grunting and breathing hard’.

-Our Sunday morning tilt say it with me Hippo, Which Is Completely Mandatory will not be featuring both Cal Ridley and Russell Gage. Fantasy owners everywhere yell, “throw it to Pitts (the Younger) please”. Meanwhile, Corduroy Patterson laughs in vulture.

-Baker ‘not TD maker’ Mayfield has a torn labrum and Browns fans nod their head, thinking that’s the reason he’s been tending to suck this year. Oh, but it’s his non-throwing shoulder though. Fans will have to go back to the drawing board.

-Do I have to mention the NBA? Fine. Some retired fellas tried to gouge the “Health Fund” with false receipts and whatever. I laughed reading the espn article because after naming the major characters involved there was this sentence. “Among those who were charged (names some random ex-players) were the only ones that averaged double figures in their career.” So congrats, dude that only averaged 9.4 points per game in your career, you didn’t get outed in an article regarding the fraud you committed.

To The Game!

Rams/Seahawks:

-Russ Wilson is 9-1 on Thursday nights as opposed to Josh Gordon who is 420 on all days ending with “Y”.

-I’m liking the look of the Rams this year but Fatt’s stellar play (last week excluded) has obscured the fact that L.A.’s D has lost Brandon Staley, three starters and has played Brady, Kyler and Wilson in successive weeks.

-If Kupp gets cb Udo Amadi defending him in the slot it’s all over. And Cooper The Catcher is getting thrown at on 33% of his routes, while Udo has a PFF coverage rating of 38.6. Yes, it’s just a number but it’s a bad number.

-Speaking of wr’s, will we see a bomb to DeSean? His steadily increasing usage rate suggests that we will. His aDOT is whopping 19.9 yards.

-This Just In: Christopher Carson will not risk his neck tonight so start your Alex “Shoulda Been Tom” Collins.

Type away. You know you need to.

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Fronkenshteen

Why the fuck cant you kick it twice? How often will it happen? Jesus Christ!

litre_cola

CFL>NFL

Game Time Decision

It’s just a rouge rule

Dunstan

So, Fox’s rules expert just completely blew that? What the fuck is he there for?

Game Time Decision

Double kick. Hahaha

Mr. Ayo

Let’s go for triple punt next. All the punts!

Doktor Zymm

Bananacakes!

Mr. Ayo

WUT?!?

The Maestro

I am issuing a fatwa on these neon jerseys.

Doktor Zymm

I think they are revenge for all the people who complained about the color blind game

Anthony In TX

I don’t think they’d be so bad with blue pants.

But the head-to-toe neon? Absolutely not.

litre_cola

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Sorry for the interruptioUn.

ballsofsteelandfury

Saw it. That was a nice play but horrible defending.

litre_cola

We were playing really well. I think the SexcsiMexi gol was offside.

King Hippo

Goddamnit, fading Fat Fuck AND Higbee in money league.

rockingdog

9-7
What the what?
Is this rams-hawks game secretly a baseball game?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m still laughing over my sister-in-law telling us that it’s her dream to retire in Scottdale.
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Game Time Decision

My BIL moved to the middle of nowhere 2 years ago. We still laugh about it

Doktor Zymm

My meth head neighbors back in Chicago wanted to move to West Virginia with him becoming a coal miner and her a housewife.

King Hippo

How do nanobubbles heal finger owies?

Brocky

My dad brought home some takeout Chinese, he’s munching on it during the game,

They zoomed in on Wilson’s finger and nows he’s lost his appetite

Brick Meathook

As long as they don’t zoom in on dogs or cats I’m good.

Doktor Zymm

More takeout for you!

rockingdog

Update;
Yea I already got him a shot.
Snacking on bar snacks.
Bar is semi-rocking.
Almost at capacity.

Dunstan

Whatever you’re buying.

Dunstan

Of course. Mix it with grape Kool-Aid and you have Purple Jesus.

Mr. Ayo

I like finger games!

— U. Meyer

Brick Meathook

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Dunstan

“Finger issues? I can relate.” — Urban M., Florida

Game Time Decision

Don’t zoom in on Russ’ finger

ballsofsteelandfury

And that’s EXACTLY what they do.

I have it in 4K, too…

Anthony In TX

Anyone else the the “WE NOT ME” jackets on the Rams’ sideline and think only of He Hate Me?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Gay extra point is NO GOOD!

Game Time Decision

Doink

Game Time Decision

That sound was awesome

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m glad that DOINK didn’t take a vacation after the end of the Pats-Tampa game. He didn’t even take a week off! Hardest working deity in the pantheon.

Game Time Decision

If up to me, it would be no games off

Or have a doink be worth more so that they try to hit it

Last edited 3 years ago by Game Time Decision
Mr. Ayo

Kicking games are on point tonite.

We really need more doinks though.

King Hippo

Placement kicker has become a distraction

Doktor Zymm

I totally forgot DJAX was on the Rams and still in the NFL

Game Time Decision

Apparently guys can no longer run once they turn 34
Thanks for that info Troy

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Twelve minutes and two seconds remaining until COSTCO CHICKEN POT PIE!

Gumbygirl

Goddammit, someone needs to cook dinner for me!

litre_cola

Does CONCACAF NAWT HAVE VAR??????

ballsofsteelandfury

Yeah, that seemed offsides to me…

Brocky

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Fronkenshteen

AWRIGHT GODDAMMIT!!! I NEED A COUPLE OF LONG GAY FIELD GOALS TO SPLIT THE PIPES!!

PHRASING!!!

rockingdog

Yoooo
Dude UNLOADED on that!
Yup not lookin good for the Sox.
Rays up 4-0 now

Brick Meathook

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Gumbygirl

Jesus Christ! That scared me, no lie.

Gumbygirl

Joe looks like Buffalo Bill.

Game Time Decision

It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again

rockingdog

That’s rocking!

Anthony In TX

Is it

Anthony In TX

Not gonna lie, in my single 20s when I, uh, had lower standards, I would have considered Troyette Aikman up there worth a spin.

Anthony In TX

Why are we getting a local news preview at halftime? What’s wrong with his face? What the fuck is he holding?

20211007_205137.jpg
rockingdog

Update;

OCG has arrived.
Shot taken. Sippin on a beer.
It’s Rocking!

King Hippo

Buy him another from us! The bar takes imaginary dollars, right?

litre_cola

Is he concerned about Canada v Mexico?????

Gumbygirl

You should drink every time he says “eh.”

Doktor Zymm

I was going to pick up a defense that wasn’t the Rams, but totally forgot and that’s okay so far!

Also, am I having a stroke or are the unis actually that color?

King Hippo

it can be two things!

Anthony In TX

Yes

Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

— B. Walsh

King Hippo

Is Canadia en rojo? Watching on me Mexi-channel

litre_cola

Oui!

Fronkenshteen

More misfortune for Tyler Lockett? Maybe my luck is turning after all, Lenny.

[looks optimistically into future]

King Hippo

Paging Mr. Ayo…

Mr. Ayo

My own hubris led me away from the computer because there was no way he’d miss that one.

My own petards have hoisted me.

King Hippo

I get it, that freezer vodka won’t pour itself (unless Ghost tWBS is hanging with ya)

Dunstan

“Pete can’t believe that…”

Yeah, I’ve heard that phrase a lot.

Fronkenshteen

That run call on 2nd down? Not good.

King Hippo

Silly Donald, you can’t even concuss him!

Brick Meathook

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King Hippo

How much Charm will be Slung here?

Dunstan

I’m going to say at least three points’ worth.

King Hippo

You always check in with good wisdom!

Gumbygirl

None. None charm.

Dunstan

“Oh sure, but when *I* say ‘that was a Gay field goal,’ I get sent to sensitivity training.” — Richie I.

King Hippo

Can they kick it? Yes they can!

hippofant

I’ve tuned in for like 7 minutes and I’m already annoyed by Aikman.

ArmedandHammered

Have had the entire game on mute, specifically due to those two.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

THIS BOTTLE OF WINE I JUST OPENED I CALL IT AN ANTIVAXXER WITH THE MISFORTUNE OF HAVING BEEN PUT ON A VENTILATOR AT A HOSPITAL THAT IS RUN BY THE DEEP STATE CAUSE I’M GONNA GIVE IT A LITTLE TIME TO BREATHE AND THEN I’M GONNA KILL IT.

litre_cola

Talk to me!

rockingdog

Bahahaha
That’s rocking!

Anthony In TX

I think I speak for most of the DFO family when I say we would like to see a Rod and Todd of the wine

jjfozz

you win everything. fucking awesome.

litre_cola

Someone please tell me DeSantis is at the Rays game.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Why, is someone threatening to launch a missile full of VX gas at the stadium?

/Carla was the prom queen

Senor Weaselo

Nice of them to improve the Trop!

Senor Weaselo

That’s not a mass spreader event though.

Fronkenshteen

The fuck is on carrol’s head and why hasn’t it had a biopsy?

yeah right

I had to scroll for this. That thing was terrifying. That carcinoma is going to eat his entire face.

litre_cola

If you put the dust at the bottom of the peanut jar with chocolate chips you are now in flavoUr country

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Mmmmm…pressed peanut sweepings and chocolate…

Last edited 3 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly