Your Very Next Sunday NFL Football Open Thread

To The Games!

Eagles/Raiders:

Can Carr get to 340 yards and at least 2 TDs? That’s been the benchmark for him in Raiders wins. Seems unsustainable for a player of his ability. As advertised, Hurts has no problem running (4 TDs last two games) but that passing thingy continues to elude him-he has but one thrown 6 pointer to his name.

Lions/Rams:

From Detroit’s perspective this game has, “Damn, the ex is doing way better with the new partner!” energy. Perhaps that will prevent this tilt from being the gawd awful blowout that everyone in the universe expects it to be.

Texans/Cards:

That 18.5 spread says it all. One thing that the Ertz trade told me? The Cards are all in this year. They obviously thought Maxx Williams was an important piece so when he went down to injury there was no fooling around, hoping things would work out with a backup. No wait and see happening here. Surprisingly, their D only trails Buffalo in allowing scoring drives only 22% of the time.

Bears/Bucs:

Now that Patricia is out of the league as a head coach there’s no one better at diminishing skill position talent than Nagy. I mean, how else does one explain the fact that Fields has only the one rushing TD to date? You’d think with his running ability he’d have at least fallen over into the end zone one other time, right?

Go be yourself in the comments.

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yeah right

The Rams Lions game has the Butt Fumble as the commentator and I can safely say he was much better at QB than in the announcers booth.

Doktor Zymm

Finally getting around to watching ep 3 of Grand Tour s4, and enjoyed the 70s style credits

BrettFavresColonoscopy

THESE BEARS I CALL THEM MY DATING LIFE IN HIGH SCHOOL BECAUSE THEY’RE PATHETIC AND EMBARRASSING

King Hippo

WEATHER GAME up next, huzzah

Mr. Ayo

Bomb cyclone!

yeah right

First half under and total under bets made.

King Hippo

That Hunter Henry catch is what will likely win this week’s money league game for Hippo.

litre_cola

Oh I am going to Detroit Lions in that league this year me thinks!

Mr. Ayo

Woot! Refill those pill bottles.

Game Time Decision

Redone guy making fun of how old TB is. Love it

Doktor Zymm

31-5 scorigami?

rockingdog

Scorigami is ROCKING!! 💯

Mr. Ayo

YES!!

King Hippo

My muted teevee box sez so

Game Time Decision

Garbage time in games is garbage

Gumbygirl

Big Gay kick!

TheRevanchist

Quit looking at my PornHub profile!

Gumbygirl

Found it!

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King Hippo

It was SUPER thanks for asking!

TheRevanchist

What I have learned today: I hate Mark Sanchez more today than yesterday. But only half as much as tomorrow.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

But he seems so nice!

Doktor Zymm

-Becky, Homecoming Queen, Brooklyn HS

Gumbygirl

But if all your dreams come true, you’ll be spending time with him. Ask him about the buttfumble.

Doktor Zymm

I am getting pretty excited about going to the Buffala game next week

Spur

comment image

TheRevanchist

Proper etiquette says you need to bring your own folding table and lighter fluid.

Mr. Ayo

Break some tables!

Doktor Zymm

I’m gonna go big and try to break an entire sideboard!

King Hippo

I want RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!! to kick the FG, for the Swift garbage time catches.

TheRevanchist

Got one!

Doktor Zymm

Has anyone rewritten “The Island of Dr. Moreau” as a slash fanfic called “The Tight End of Foster Moreau”?

rockingdog

LoL and I thought Allen Robinson was finally gonna do something for the bears today
He’s 💩

Spur

Baby Buster Blows It

Doktor Zymm

Revenge is a dish best served incompetently!

King Hippo

He can always go back to Army.

rockingdog

LoL

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Doktor Zymm

Do you think Boston Scott is one of those kids who was named after the place they were conceived?

Doktor Zymm

That’s actually quite harsh on every Giants OC ever

herodotus450

I just dont think the general populace is ready for the bland sarcasm from the football talking guys in Tampa.

Doktor Zymm

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Last edited 2 years ago by Doktor Zymm
King Hippo

5 score lead, throwing at the goal line. Because yeah, he’s all about TEAM that guy. No concern for records or glorrreeee

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Based on today it’s hard to see Mahomes playing to the age of 28. I haven’t seen someone almost get killed via the choices made by a Reid since Britt Reid decided to get liquored up before crashing his truck into a stopped vehicle on the freeway, causing life-threatning injuries to a 5 year-old girl.

Spur

Would the Bears take a look at Cam Newton?

Last edited 2 years ago by Spur
Doktor Zymm

Black QB in Chicago? Have you BEEN to Chicago?!

Doktor Zymm

“You can’t have a closed fist punch, you can only slap-fight and make 3 Stooges noises”

King Hippo

25-19 Scorigami??

Mr. Ayo

No. 25-18 would be.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

There’s some kind of a fashion shoot going on in front of my house. They were very nice to my dog so I didn’t give them crap but it’s kind of irritating for a bunch of models to just show up in front of my garage unannounced while I’m standing around in a cutoff t-shirt with a hammer and drill in my hands, looking like a portrait of manliness. Fox News is right, California really is turning into a nightmarish hellscape.

Doktor Zymm

Photobomb!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I asked them if they were going to give Penny a job.

herodotus450

Whatever you do, don’t feed them carbs after midnight. It’ll go straight to their ribs and they’ll never get work again.

Spur

Who’s ready for some Philly garbage time TDs?

Mr. Ayo

I need some imaginary 500’s TDs

King Hippo

Is it Big Dick Nick time in Chi****?

Doktor Zymm

I’m kind of disappoint that they didn’t go full on rhyme and call him Thick Dick Nick.

Doktor Zymm

Cooper Kupp is only a vowel exchange away from being a homonym for Keeper Cup

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[frowns, thinking about his Transformers thermos that Olivia declared him to be “too grown up for”] – Eli Manning