Your Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Oh, we got ourselves a live one here don’t we? I was reading that these two squadoos have the best combined record of all the games that have been played on Thursday. Too bad one team didn’t bring many of its starters.

Newsy Notes:

-Stop me if you’ve heard this one before in 2016, 2017 and 2019-J.J. Watt is down and out for the rest of the season. Many writers/radio talkers made note that the herowarrior suffered the injury in the 1st half but played the entire game. Whatever-you and I could run around and hit people as well if we were all hopped up on copious amounts of kangaroo semen like he probably was. I look forward to the IG posts of him working out. #strongerthaneva!

-The Bengals are the top seed in the AFC playoff race this week and a trendy pick in Survivor. As I said when I lost my virginity, “This is happening too fast!”. If they acquire an edge rusher or cb before the trade deadline I’ll believe that the front office is all in. My guess is that they remain complacent the way they have for 35+ years.

-DAK! must ‘cross a threshold’ before he’ll be allowed to play on Sunday. No word on whether he has to identify the one, true grail afterwards.

-Rooney Rule Boogaloo: now teams are required to go through the motions with two minority coaching candidates before they pick the recycled white guy.

To The Game!

Packers/Cards:

-Guys by the name of St. Brown, Cobb, Taylor and Rodgers(?) are the wr’s that will be helping Aaron carry Green Bay to victory this evening. Also, they’ll be missing some cb’s and de’s.

-Arizonny has only played two one-score games all year but it still feels to me that when faced with some serious adversity they’ll lay an egg. After all, it’s in the Cards.

-Fantasy-wise, be advised that if you have Conner and play him, Edmonds will get the TD. If you play Edmonds, Conner will get the score. Yes, we do live in a confusing yet unjust world.

Do that thing you do.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Missed all the things due to a work dinner but see the Packers won, so i guess the world is still a cruel unforgiving place

Gumbygirl

I need an early night. Gumby has an appointment in Loma Linda tomorrow morning to get a camera shoved up his peen. Oddly enough, he’s not looking forward to it. Happy Birthday Fronk, later taters!

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Mr. Ayo

Can that account be suspended for abuse?

Horatio Cornblower

If they weren’t suspended for taping practices, deflating balls, or molesting immigrants, I don’t think this is gonna do it.

Fronkenshteen

So what, does someone pour mineral water on Larry Csonka’s trembling fingertips now?

2Pack

Its like you have a spy cam in his rec room.

Gumbygirl

They can just shove his trembling fingers in his diaper.

Brocky

Qj cha jakzh znga uazksksmMa

WHY GHE THE FUCK DID I TURN THE GAME BACK ON IM STARTING MURRAY WHat tHE FUCK YOU GOD STAB ME IN THE GOD DAMN DICK

ballsofsteelandfury

God:
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I would be impressed with God’s sense of humor if that was the human form he chose for a visit to Earth.

Redshirt

That’s one way to lose an undefeated season.

Col. Duke LaCross

The Scout Feed guys on the Amazon Prime audio feed are dumbfounded right now.

Fronkenshteen

Well that was unexpected

Gumbygirl

Wow.

The Maestro

RASUL DOUGLAS OUTTA NOWHERE

Col. Duke LaCross

What the fuck was that?

Col. Duke LaCross

The playcalling for both of these teams in the Redzone these last two drives has been insane.

Fronkenshteen

Fuck. Now I’m digging Aerosmith’s first record. You can smell the bologna on their breath.

BugEyedBoo

Second one is a lot better. It’s their best album, although Toys In the Attic has their best song on it.

Horatio Cornblower

Aerosmith played an early-career show at The Shaboo Inn, which was down the street from where I now live, (and which burned down “under mysterious circumstances”), and was billed as “Arrowsmith”

I’ve seen the handbill, and it’s pretty funny, but it’s not on the internet in the 6 seconds I just looked for it.

Anyway, Shaboo, which was very well known and had bands like Kiss and The Police, is now a shitty mall which is rapidly running out of stores. C’est l’vie.

Doktor Zymm

Hm, what would be the most entertaining outcome here? Arizona gets the TD but misses the extra point, GB has time to do the same damn thing, but has to settle for the FG, at which time we go to OT. Then fuck-all happens, game ends in a tie and no one’s fans are happy

Sharkbait

I’ll take OT and a tie pls!

Horatio Cornblower

I’ve been slaving away in the #content mines. Have we actually stumbled into a really good Thursday night game?

Senor Weaselo

Have we been making Meta jokes all night? I only saw one post regarding. Meanwhile, otaku, JRPG lovers, and weebs in general put on opera masks and said en masse “It’s showtime!”

I can put 60 seconds on the clock.

Redshirt

I thought about it, but I figured it’d be too self-referential.

Doktor Zymm

This is what happens when social media METAstatizes

Gatoraids

Meta World Piss. Zuch makes the Lawnmower Man look charismatic

TheRevanchist

I’m excited about Macross Plus, as well. Will definitely be in the theater for that one.

Recovery Whiskey

The Shield wants Tampa Tommy vs Green Bay Aaron for the NFC finals.

Redshirt

The ’72 Dolphins puts the celebratory Ensure bottles on ice.

Horatio Cornblower

I would like to put the ’72 Dolphins on ice and push them into the Arctic Ocean.

Recovery Whiskey

Hot taek: Teams with referee flag colors get too many breaks from the referees.

herodotus450

Wish I had invented the “win probability” bullshit, I’d be relaxing on my Thursday yacht right about now and all I’d’ve had to do is make a program that divides the current point margin by time remaining in the game, and then somehow normalize to 100%.

Recovery Whiskey

I wish I’d driven over to Bellevue in 1994 and lit Jeff Bezos garage on fire. We’ve all got regrets.

Redshirt

I wish I invested money in Amazon when it just sold books and music.

Spur

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Gumbygirl

Loves him some pussy!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s not uncommon for my cat to do that to my dog. Mostly the dog just stays still and looks kind of nervous.

Horatio Cornblower

When one of our cats used to do that to the other the vet told us that cats do that to try to get the other cat, (or dog in this case), to fuck off.

Horatio Cornblower

In Soviet Russia, pussy eats you!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I just watched the Randy Lanier documentary on Netflix (episode 2 of Bad Sports). It was really interesting, that crew had a TON of fun in the mid-eighties.

Redshirt

This NFL game became a Elimination Match so subtlety, I didn’t even notice it until now.

Fronkenshteen

If anyone has seen Stephen Merchant’s new show “The Outlaws”, please dish. Cant wait till I can stream it.

Fronkenshteen

I turn fifty in @ an hour, so I’ve been listening to albums of my childhood. I’m currently digging the absolute SHIT out of KISS’s first record.

Fronkenshteen

This has to be a Chase Edmonds quarter, right?

Gatoraids

to goto the medical tent sure

clint greasewood

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Gumbygirl

The Passenger!

Gumbygirl

He certainly is, but I think they were playing the Siouxsie and the Banshees’ version.

Last edited 3 years ago by Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

Hurry, before your city lies in dust.

Gumbygirl

Tonyan is Donyan.

Sharkbait

RIP

Spur

Joe Buck: And now a sideline update from Erin.
Erin Andrews: Great news, one the players that almost died on the field can see in color again.

Redshirt

“…and the guy who got his knee disintegrated is a X-Men fan, so he can now go as Professor X for Halloween.”

Redshirt

Welp, Kick Returns are about to go bye-bye.

Redshirt

Double KO!

Col. Duke LaCross

Both guys ded.