Are you in the playoffs? I think I’ve got it made in three of four leagues but I’ll have to see how things shake out tonight. Can’t believe that last minute fill-ins J. Guyton and K.J. Osborn both came through in Freezer Vodka-that never happens for me.
Newsy Notes:
-There’s a corner of the interwebs that is marveling over Herbert’s toss to Guyton at the end of the half and when I saw it I just said, “of course, it’s the fucking Giants!” After all, they have now given up 59 points in the last minutes of the first half while having not scored a point. But I’ve watched the play several times now and the D played it correctly, thinking that with under thirty seconds left the play would be a 15 yard out pass or a thirty yarder to the middle of the field, a timeout and a field goal. It would be difficult to anticipate that a 64 air yard pass would gently drop into Guyton’s bucket in the end zone. Ballsy call. That’s Herbert’s 10th pass completion over 55+ air yards in a little over a year and a half, btw.
-These Walking Boots Were Made For Walking: Speaking of big arms, Josh Allen is in a boot and has no idea what his injury is. I wouldn’t get too excited because these days the walking boot is used quite a bit to relieve any sort of strain on a foot injury and speed healing.
-Speaking of Foot Injuries: The Ravens medical staff (as of this morning) wasn’t sure if LAMAR! had regular sprainage or (oh no) high ankle sprainage. The latter would of course would be very bad news.
-All of the Fins rb’s are Covided! If things remain the same you could see a backfield of has-beens Lamar Miller and Duke Johnson or noobie Gerrid Doaks.
To The Game!
Rams/Cards:
-Thank goodness Arizonny is home for this big tilt, right? Thing is, they’re 3-2 there and undefeated on the road. Must be the humidity.
-Rams went all-in and grabbed Von Miller and promptly gave up an average of almost 30 points in the month of November. You would think there’s just too much talent along the line and at linebacker and they’ll get it figured out.
-Sony Michel, it’s your time to shine. What do the Cards two losses and two closest wins have in common? That would be getting steamrolled by the opponent’s run game. Average yards given up have been 166 in those tilts. Not better news-they give up an average of 4.7 yards per play on the ground which is the 2nd-worst in the league. Sounds like a fatal playoff flaw to me.
-To pull this one out Stafford has to avoid turnovers-he has a 23-3 TD/INT number in the Rams wins.
Go ahead and type. You know you want to.
Not gonna lie, that Khal Drogo/Aquaman feller gives me a tingle in the undercarriage. Maybe I just have to pee? Shalom suckas, I’m going to read. Should wake up to a winter wonderland!
As someone who drank wine before dinner, and didn’t get home soon enough to watch the game, the highlights were fantastic. I really missed a doozy of a game. I’m never rooting for LA to win, but I am happy that Stafford keeps winning. Good for him! He seems like a nice fellow.
I always felt sorry for him in Detroit. He does seen like a good dude.
So I somehow won. I was projected to win by 30, then I was losing by 10, and that last little bit of chuck yardage was the difference.
This ends a 4 game losing streak. I was in first place in week 7, then dropped 5 of my next six. I’m too lazy to add more managers to my league, so playoffs don’t start till week after next, but God darn, i still need a victory and help next week to sneak into the fourth seed.
Heehee, Chuck yardage
Conner ded.
EXHALE.
Nice game by RAMMMMIT and my Super Bowl bet is still in play.
Well that….that happened.
What the fuck was that last play?
The Aristocrats!
The Whore Mary?
You have one job, Hands Team. One job!
They had a job! With their hands!
SUCCESSFUL ONSIDE!!
Sudden Change
Dammit RAMMMMMMMIT way to fuck up the onside kick.
Qards are giving it back.
So LA has the 2022 Superb Owl.
Next year? Arizona.
Just announced the 2024 will be VEGAS BABY.
Need a DFO trip with chartered planes and suites at Bellagio.
Zymm, get working on this please and thank you.
From what I hear, she already has the private jet sorted out.
I’ll pick you up on the way to the airport.
I’ve always wanted to go to Vegas. I’ve literally had two opportunities fall through
MAKE IT HAPPEN.
You need to experience it at least once, like getting cornholed by a horse.
Which is also available in Vegas. Or so I’ve heard.
Vegas Virgin!
/ rubs hands together gleefully like Monty Burns
Why call timeout there? Their entire OL ran fifty yards. Why give them a chance to catch their breath?
………. .
Arizona knows there are only four quarters in a game, correct?
“Don’t worry, men! We’ll get them in the 5th Quintet!”
Their analytics department got their degrees from the University of Phoenix.
I need a 40+yard Gay field Goal.
Huh, I guess Face Masks are now legal.
Hey dunno if you covered this before, but were you affected by the non-climate-change over the weekend? Was worried about our Kentucky-adjacent commentist.
No. I was spared. Pray for those who weren’t spared.
Glad to hear it. Stay away from those, seems like a bad time.
Yeah, I worked in a place like that candle factory. I knew that if a tornado hit it, it would collapse like a house of cards. If a tornado was on the way, screw the Tornado Shelter Area, I’m running to my car and flooring it out of its path.
When I was 19′-20 I worked in a horrible corrugated shack plastics factory. The warehouse, on a hill about 50 yards behind it caught fire. Huge inferno, tons of toxic smoke. They evacuated hundreds of people. The owners kept us working, with water pouring in among the equipment. They told us the firemen said we weren’t allowed to leave because we would run over their hoses. I called my dad, who was the chairman of the countywide private industry council. We were all told we could leave suddenly. The fireman were pissed off when they saw us coming out-they had been told we were already gone. The owners were mobbed up sleazebags. I got fired not long after.
I was down in your neck of the woods this weekend, just off the UC campus. I had to fix my daughter’s car. I’d be badmouthing her lazy-ass boyfriend and raving about getting him to fix it, but a) he barely knows how to put gas in it, and b) I know exactly which jackleg repair attempt failed, and who was responsible for it.
Sounds like the person that said my radiator had a hole in it and was bone-dry. After driving it on the highway for 20 miles with the thermostat in between the R and M of NORMAL.
Or maybe it was the guy who said all four of my brakes and rotors were bad and it was undriveable. After I drove the car there, in stop and go traffic.
No, rats/squirrels/chipmunks ate the wiring to the fuel injectors. The dealership ‘repaired’ it by running loose wire to the injectors from the wiring harness. To be fair, a new wiring harness is $700 not counting labor, so this scheme was sort of okay. But then the vermin came back for seconds, and this time ate the repairs. Yours truly put in a shrink tube connector where the wire used to be, but there was only about a half-inch of wire to work with, and I knew when I did it that I had just made a new point of failure. This time, instead of a shrink wrap connector we have twisted wires, electrical tape, and blind faith.
Conner is much better than he ever was in Pittsburgh, right?
They’re using him a LOT better than when he was there.
Yeah, that’s definitely a lot of it. Also wonder if he’s better since he’s further removed from his college cancer experience. Like…more back to the beast he was? Dunno, but it seems like having cancer would take A WHILE to recover from.
Maybe. I do think they wanted him to be the next Franco Harris and that’s just not his game. That’s why they drafted Najee Harris.
Conner is not a workhorse. He’s a versatile back that shines in a non-traditional playmaker role.
He’s very similar to Cordarrelle Patterson just coming at it from the RB side instead of from the WR side.
Yeah, his receiving skills have been surprising. Good for Kliff for seeing it. Kinda (very very) sorry I ignored him in fantasy drafts.
I had a chance to pick up Najee Harris off the waiver wire, week 1. Why on earth would I want to do that?
Functional offensive line helps.
This is true.
I’m gonna finish my money league at 7-7. Luckily I’m #3 overall because my division is dogshit
“7-7? You can make a career of that!” — Jeff Fisher
Dear Roger Goodell,
I’m watching Lost In Space.
Fuck You,
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
(Raiders fans think this is a new show)
((also excited about that new band Night Ranger)
Now on Kindle – “Double Teams Are for Cowards: the Kliff Kingsbury Story”
Thing about Kupp, you pass him on the street, at most you think “goofy hipster dork” but probably not even that. Dude is an absolute beast.
He works at Foot Locker. Get ya some tight kicks brah. Or a rancher in Montana.
1% means there’s still a chance. My guys are grinders! Balls is fucked.
Ugh, he’s beating me too in a different league.
I love how Yahoo gives you a 1% chance even though you have no one playing tonight.
Also, watch me shoot my wad this week and suck it up next week in the playoffs.
Sounds like you’re gonna felch your playoff game.
Been doing that for a few years now. It’s really annoying, can’t help it.
Haven’t THC’d since college, and back then it was stems n seeds. Just drink til you can’t feel pain, then keep going.
I love your waffles.
For the Die Hard die hards
Fan-fucking tastic
,it will take a herculean effort for my parlay to come in tonight, by which I mean a mobster named Hercules must have gotten the rams to throw this game. TILLIDRUH—-I’m a shite bettor.
Guess who’s starting kyler Murray in fantasy
Jesus?
The Holy Spirit #Obvio
I laughed so hard at this my stomach still hurts the next morning. Not just because of the pic but wondering about the thought process that went into this and what the person manufacturing it was doing to keep from laughing.
I just wanna find an ergonomic office chair with bite-proof armrests.
Sounds like you need a new secretary.
Or his helper monkey Mojo has something wrong with him.
.
Just put the game on in time to see the Kyler pick. Watching old 8 out of 10 cats does countdown christmas episodes seemed like a better time.
Rams up 27-13? This game is over!*
*it’s not over, I’m just sleepy
You don’t have to accept the standard game length like some sort of sheep person! Go to bed and sleep like a sheepdog person!
Presented without comment. (like I said, I’m tired)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xsLXuUEqbI&ab_channel=bathrobejedi
It can be both!
Yeah without a manning cast not involved cuz my opponent had Edmonds, which woulda been horrifying to watch had he started. so now part of a 5 person tiebreaker in a league that someone decided to goto h2h instead of points in espn. expect as much complaining as the election tomorrow.
Can we call the game over now? Like a baseball rain thing or whatnot?
Stealing my comments a minute before I make them? I’m on to you, Spam. If that’s even your real name. smgdh…
It is my real name. In a weird quirk, it is also my social security number.
Ok, needed that. I have Kupp TD, Connor TD, and RAMMIT ML in a parlay, letttsss gooooooo
Kyler LOVES throwing to RAMMMMIT linebackers.