Your Monday Night Football NFC East Showdown Open Thread

Can this game possibly exceed the slug, er, slouchfest that we witnessed last night? (a hearty thank you to all that weighed in so that at least it was entertaining) Perhaps not-but first…

Newsy Notes:

-Despite stumbling and losing his sense of gravity, Tua has not entered the concussion protocol. Oh sure, he’s banged up elsewhere on his body but everything’s ok noggin-wise.

-The NFL, after consulting no one as they are want to do, have called off the long-running travesty that was the Pro Bowl. Going forward it will be replaced with [shuffles papers] “teaching moments”? And family-friendly stuff at fair prices no doubt.

-The Bills had a possession time of 40:40-the most any team has had in a loss since 2014. They ran 90 offensive plays vs the Fins 39.

To The Game!

Cowboys/Giants:

-Linewrecker Micah Parsons is listed as questionable but has indicated he will play. Good news for fantasy leagues that still utilize an IDP spot. (really?) This young gentleman has 17 sacks in 18 games and there’s more on the way this evening.

-The Dimes’ 6.3 intended air yards when throwing are the 6th lowest in the league behind three ballboys, a left-handed cheerleader and Gus, the Jags 73 year-old trainer.

-There’s method behind that incompetency though. The Giants o-line has allowed the most pressures and the 3rd-most sacks so far. It’s a work in progress just like the other five years, people

-This New York squadoo hasn’t seen 3-0 since 2009 and have lost 10 consecutive prime time games.

-Cooper will see plenty of jerseys because in lieu of talent Martindale is sending extra rushers at the 3rd highest rate so far. Kayvon Thibodeaux, the 5th overall pick, will be one of those guys. He’s finally ready to play.

-Take The Under: Dimes’ passing prop is 198.5-he hasn’t thrown for more than 190 so far this year.

This smells like an ugly game-be sure to wear some deodorant.

 

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fleshwound_NPG

this game becoming…good?

Brocky

I legit don’t know a single person who doesn’t prefer the manningcast

Dunstan

As annoying as they can be, at least they’re trying to provide actual insight. It never ceases to amaze me that networks pay former star players huge money to say things that I could hear from the guy next to me at the sports bar. “What a great throw by [insert star QB] That’s why he’s [the goat/one of the best in the National Football League].”

Gumbygirl

I wonder what their ratings are compared to Troy and Joe? Probably pisses them off big time.

Brocky

I’m just gonna post this picture from Monday night raw out of context

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Redshirt

I have faith that Triple H is going to be way better than Vince at Creative, but even I’m want this angle to end. Either fight or f***, I don’t care, just end it.

Gumbygirl

I ‘m finally off the clock, sort of, from babysitting my father in law and his lazy son, on my birthday, yay? I saw maybe two minutes of this game, did I miss anything good?

fleshwound_NPG

its the nfc east after dark.

no.

Dunstan

Happy Birthday, from your favorite DFOer!

SonOfSpam

I’m telling the others.

Gumbygirl

You are, and someone has a big mouth!

WCS

Congrats on your latest lap around Sol.

Recovery Whiskey

Shaqon had a nice run. Thats about it

SonOfSpam

HAPPY DAMN BIRTHDAY DAMMIT!

Buy yourself something nice with your own money.

Gumbygirl

My FIL gave me a hundred bucks. I’ve spent two hundred on food so far, and we’re here until Thursday. I’m going home tomorrow with the dog to spend the night with my poor cat.
Oh and check this out, when I got home from the store today, after i bought dessert stuff, Gumby said” oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, SIL has a birthday cake for you in the garage fridge.” Gumbygirl is now Grumpygirl. I need to go upstairs after this game, have a few edibles, and take a bubble bath in their ginormous bathtub. And I am not doing the fucking dishes first.

SonOfSpam

Treat yourself today. Tomorrow you’re just another meatbag.

Also, eat ALL the dessert.

Doktor Zymm

Chuck the dishes out the window and eat the cake in the bath!

Mr. Ayo

Just our charming wit. Happy birthday!

litre_cola

Happy damn birthday to a damn lady! Go get high and relax!

Redshirt

Happy Birthday, To a Favorite DFOer From an Adequate DFOer.

Doktor Zymm

You missed getting Happy Birthdays from us earlier! HAPPIEST OF DAYS OF BIRTH!

TheRevanchist

Jimmy Kimmel ruined halftime, which already sucks.

But happy b-day, GG!

fleshwound_NPG

raiders: historically, nobody gets flagged more than us

cowboys: we’re warming up

Mr. Ayo

Oh my.

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Gatoraids

Let Russ Punt

Recovery Whiskey

The brutal truth right here

clint greasewood

Live look at the Giants side line.
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Doktor Zymm

Ok, suboptimal, but apparently I care more about getting a totally unearned $17.50 when I just happily paid $20 for a cocktail than I do about this game result!

Brocky

Yay touchdown

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Doktor Zymm

Hrm, good that they’re in FG range, bad that they aren’t burning more clock. Prop bets make me root for odd things, kinda digging it

Sharkbait

Props are the most fun by far

Redshirt

Did New York score 10 points or is the Point Guy asleep on the keyboard?

Doktor Zymm

Is it just me, or is Troy morphing into skinny Rex Ryan?

SonOfSpam

Well, show him your feet and let’s see.

Doktor Zymm

Woohoo! Now for a dallas field goal. After all, cows live in fields

King Hippo

and Persons have goals!

LemonJello

And with that, I’m off like a prom dress. Later, Taters!

fleshwound_NPG

points! several! more than 3!!!

King Hippo

This is about as good as I’ve seen Dimebag play.

They have 6 points at home.

fleshwound_NPG

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Doktor Zymm

Offsetting? Yup, the refs just hate everyone here, lol

Horatio Cornblower

Cowboys are absolutely the dumbest team in the NFL.

Sharkbait

Giants just said hold my beer

King Hippo

Special Needs Division is Special

SonOfSpam

You say this with the Raiders still in the NFL.

fleshwound_NPG

that flag was late and thrown 30 yards up into the air

Brocky

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ballsofsteelandfury

This is wonderful

Brocky

I saw it on social media, people were taking it seriously while I was laughing my ass off

Recovery Whiskey

Get a rope

Redshirt

That explains the laughter coming from the Film Rooms.

LemonJello

Lamb doesn’t seem all that interested in actually catching any of the passes thrown his way.

Brocky

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LemonJello

Diggs is determined to get a pick from Danny Dimes. Even if it costs them the game.

Redshirt

This is nice, ESPN. Keep showing highlights to past games. You don’t need to go back to the actual, live game. I’ll take Bengals losses. At least we’re entertaining when we lose.

SonOfSpam

THIS COWBOYS I CALL THEM LINDSEY GRAHAM BECAUSE THEY LOVE GETTING ALL THE SACKS

Horatio Cornblower

There’s no chance Daniel Jones survives this game as a functional human being.

WCS

This implies he’s a functional human being to begin with.

Redshirt

I didn’t watch the halftime show, but based on your comments, I believe this is a close approximation.

Truth about the Talking Cat – Rick and Morty – YouTube

clint greasewood

No matter what the result of this game somebody next week will be 3-1 after the Giants-Bears game.

fleshwound_NPG

while the game will be 3-2

WCS

2-1-1 wants a word.

Sharkbait

┏┓
┃┃╱╲ In this
┃╱╱╲╲ house
╱╱╭╮╲╲ we root for
▔▏┗┛▕▔
╱▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔╲
Scorigami
╱╱┏┳┓╭╮┏┳┓ ╲╲
▔▏┗┻┛┃┃┗┻┛▕▔

Wakezilla

I see watching preseason hockey was the right call tonight

WCS

Wait, this isn’t preseason MNF?

Sharkbait

Based on tonight, The Ice Giants are ready to try and kill my liver come the month of May

Redshirt

Giants are 2-0? This is a weird start to this season.

Horatio Cornblower

Judge is definitely pressing for #61.

TheRevanchist

Why is Jimmy Kimmel on my TV?

SonOfSpam

Better than Fallon.

LemonJello

Damning with faint praise.

Doktor Zymm

Bet still alive at the half! Meanwhile, I am enjoying dessert

Doktor Zymm

In retrospect, I also should have bet all the unders

King Hippo

Sunday NighT FITBAW from…Wichita!!??

Mr. Ayo

MAYBE!

WCS

WEIRD

fleshwound_NPG

INTERESTING

Redshirt

I’m thinking Tennessee.

Indianapolis, Detroit and Pittsburgh are at home, and no way they play in Chicago. Cincinnati may be more neutral location, but I doubt they’d get 65,000 of us to show up at full price and NFL would want a full house. Plus three days is a hell of a turnaround.

Last edited 2 years ago by Redshirt
King Hippo

Fashion maven Suzy Kolber has outdone herself tonight. Fantastic.

Last edited 2 years ago by King Hippo
BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s just the cosmic push i need to not watch the second half.

fleshwound_NPG

last night: 11-10

nfc east: challenge accepted

LemonJello

Are we thinking a 6-5 final?

WCS

5-5

LemonJello

The Hague has declared this game a Crime Against Humanity and therefore, there will be no second half.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

SHANKLOR

fleshwound_NPG

i would too having to do these nfc east games during primetime (when old refs go to bed at 8pm)

SonOfSpam

Pretty brave of Daboll to wear one of those “Fuck Dem New Yorkers” hats.

Redshirt

Based on the 10 seconds I watched and their faces, how many times has Peyton swore and how many times has Eli cried tonight?

WCS

Pey-Pey wants to give Elisha a swirlie in the worst way.

King Hippo

Toss a slant, kick a FG

WCS

NAOP

Horatio Cornblower

“Way ahead of you.”

Bill Parcells

Spur

that never gets old

fleshwound_NPG

diggs got asteroid’ed

King Hippo

Donks’ passing offense against That’s Rikki’s Raiders! secondary might just break the space/time continuum.

Redshirt

What happens when the Stoppable Force meets the Moveable Object?

Sharkbait

Bad OPI call is bad.

King Hippo

I am sure the Mrs. Reacted Reasonably

Sharkbait

Mrs. Sharkbait: ” well I think it was reasonable”

Last edited 2 years ago by Sharkbait
King Hippo

The Sharkbaits cat and/or dog were under the guest room bed, and not available FOAR comment.

Mr. Ayo

BLEEEERGH will not stand for any offense today.