Your NFC Conference Champeenship Open Thread

Hey, was anyone surprised to read that Joe Judge was an extremely shitty qb coach and that he alienated other coaches and players on the Pats, especially Mac Jones, his primary responsibility? Word has it he’s been relieved of that job but will stay with the team in a reduced role. The pathetic dude will be coaching high school in five years for sure.

/thanks, I needed to get that off my chest

To The Game!

Niners/Eagles:

-San Fran has not allowed an rb to rush for more than 70 yards in 27 straight tilts. This year they allowed an average of only 79 yards per game-but more about that later.

-In what figures to be a close game it might be noteworthy to mention that the Eagles went for it on 4th down 32 times, converting 22 of them-that was good for second overall. Across the aisle, Baby Shanny leans towards old school thinking in that he likes to turn things over to his D, trying to win the field advantage game as well as trying to get turnovers.

-It says on the intranets that a rook qb has never won a Conference Championship game. One of the reasons that Purdy has been successful is that he is more slippery in the pocket than Jimmy G. This takes me back to the Giants ’91 Super Bowl win and the runup to it. When Simms went down he was replaced by Jeff Hostetler who was much more mobile and defenses weren’t able to adjust in time. I think Purdy is benefiting from the same sort of circumstance.

-When Philly has lost they’ve given up some big rushing totals. The Commies beat them and ran for 152, the Cowboys went for 115 and the Saints had 129.

-Under The Radar Guy: Keep an eye on Niners wr Jauan Jennings-if he’s in on 1st or 2nd down they are likely running the ball because he is an exceptional blocker. If he’s around for 3rd down Purdy will likely be looking for him as his nickname is “Third and JJ”.

-Philly was second in the league for explosive pass plays. (gains of 20+ and 40+ yards) Hurts ended up 4th in deep pass DVOA and 5th in completed air yards per pass attempt. The Niners have given up a pass of 46+ yards in their last five games. Some wr’s have had great games against them-Lamb had 117, Davante 153, JuJu 124 and MVS had 111.

-Since week 13 the Eagles have played only one team that has a defensive DVOA better than 16th in the league-in those games they averaged 33.6 points but vs the Saints (#1 overall) they scored a mere 10.

Have at it.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy
Spur

yup, asshole Eagles. Punk ass team

Doktor Zymm

Oh shit, NOW the game is over cause everyone is getting ejected

LemonJello

There it is!

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Mr. Ayo

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

Petronel

And the cherry on the shit sundae is this.

WCS

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Brick Meathook

Gregg, how does it feel to lose a Super Bowl? Is it a special kind of losing?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Rikki right now (artist’s conception):

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Brick Meathook

Hey one of my shots was in that Wakanda trailer that was just shown on national TV.

That is the most it will ever be seen.

Doktor Zymm

46-7 is the closest available scorigami

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The idea of Philadelphia going for two after scoring another touchdown is fantastic.

ThePirateSloth

The rest of this game should just be kneel downs. It’s over

Doktor Zymm

The Niners D should probably get double game bonuses since they’re expected to play offense too

WCS

The entire team deserves hazard pay.

LemonJello

Jebus. SHUT. UP. OLSEN.

Mr. Ayo

Rocky Greenwall out here!

Mr. Ayo

Wait, was that just a Creed III in game promo?

ballsofsteelandfury

Backups can go in after the next score.

fleshwound_NPG
LemonJello

They were soooooo close to retirement. Had the place in Florida all picked out. Do a little fishing…

ThePirateSloth

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Brick Meathook

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ThePirateSloth

TOO SOON

Redshirt

Why are the Eagles still playing their starters?

litre_cola

This result pleases me. Now get Minshew in there.

King Hippo

Yeah backups should be all in

Spur

Its been all over but the Eagle gloating.

King Hippo

This should be like chess and you have option to concede checkmate

Doktor Zymm

They already knocked over their king TWICE

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Jesus, a left handed shovel pass would have been better than that

Redshirt

I don’t know, guys. I think this is a passing down.

LemonJello

THIS EAGLES DEFENSE, I CALL A CHOLERA OUTBREAK BECAUSE THEY ARE KILLING THESE FORTYNINERS!

ballsofsteelandfury

Um, Philly, THEY’RE NOT PASSING THE BALL!!

Horatio Cornblower

THIS GUY BROCK PURDY I CALL HIM ELI ELI LAMA SABACHTHANI, BECAUSE HE’S BEEN FORSAKEN BY HIS GOD AND HE CAN’T THROW A FOOTBALL!!!

Doktor Zymm

CMC trying to keep running and escape out the tunnel before he gets hurt too

fleshwound_NPG

as long as the niners dont line him up under center he’ll be fine

ballsofsteelandfury

The Eagles should be packing the box. There’s no way Purdy can throw the ball 20 yards in any direction.

Dunstan

“Packing the box is tougher than it sounds.” — Brett F.

ballsofsteelandfury

Tell me about it!

– Giselle B.

LemonJello

“Preaching to the choir!”
-D. Favre

fleshwound_NPG

CMC left the panthers and now finds himself playing for panthers west

LemonJello

Josh Johnson is officially out with a “lower back injury” per Miami medical staff.

Last edited 1 year ago by LemonJello
LemonJello

Ah, so THE NARRATIVE is that the Eagles lose to the Bengals in the Owl?

Redshirt

.

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Brick Meathook

Kevin Bacon went full retard right there. Never do that.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hyundai hired Kevin Bacon for the Ioniq 6 ad and didn’t lean into Ioniq 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon?!

ballsofsteelandfury

Who was the wife? Isn’t she famous too?

King Hippo

Kyra Sedwick. Long time HippoCrush

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s what I thought but that didn’t look like her. Was it her?

Horatio Cornblower

I think that’s their daughter. They live in Litchfield, CT some of the time and frequent a restaurant near one of my favorites bars.

And I have never in my life laid eyes on any of them.

WCS

Meg Ryan

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I thought that was his daughter….

ballsofsteelandfury

That makes sense. I’ve got it on mute so…

King Hippo

And I was just talking real life. I am paying only the faintest TV attention

LemonJello

Iggles are just asking for a Niner’s defender (Bosa) to just take the penalty and Trent Green their QB.

Dunstan

This USFL erasure, and I will not stand for it!

ballsofsteelandfury

Where is the Super Bowl this year?

fleshwound_NPG

zona

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Bring your papers, I guess

LemonJello

Rolling or Immigration?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Either one as long as they’re free of bamboo fibers.

ballsofsteelandfury

That touchdown was a thing of beauty.

WCS

This is Bungle-level brain-shitting from the Niners.

Redshirt

Can confirm.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This is working but is really dumb play calling. Just protect Hurts and don’t let the lead go below two scores.

Also everyone’s dumb and I’m grumpy.

Redshirt

Why are the Eagles trying to get Hurts killed?

King Hippo

Probably a salary cap thing

Spur

yes

LemonJello

Hurts just doesn’t want to play in the Owl if he keeps taking hits like that.

LemonJello

If, and I stress, IF she were to disappear, you were here with us the whole time.

ballsofsteelandfury

It’s not like anyone would miss her…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m not saying it’s your wife’s fault but if she can learn anything from those first nations, it would be the importance of boundaries.

ballsofsteelandfury

I have an idea that hat would solve your problems!

Each Saturday, go into the city (or Friday if you’re already there for work) and buy a bag of Arby’s.

When MIL shows up on Sunday evening, give her the bag of Arby’s as her meal and explain that you didn’t cook today.

Problem solved.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

OR poison.

ballsofsteelandfury

Hence Arby’s

Mr. Ayo

Yeah, distinction without a difference.

And no, I’m not currently browsing their menu on DoorDash. That’s someone else’s phone.

LemonJello

Well, enjoy destroying your city tonight, Iggles fans…

WCS

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herodotus450

Fuck Tomb? They stole my idea!

King Hippo

Not gonna be a problem today, but they got no shot in the Owl with Hurts playing like this

litre_cola

Hippo my friend. Just win.

fleshwound_NPG

neither chefs nor bungles have a defense like this, tho

Mr. Ayo

Correct.

King Hippo

Fair. They also have the bye week to try alternate horse steroid combos

herodotus450

Miles Sanders and Boston Scott, now there’s an American, Catholic, American combo of names

King Hippo

Somebody who only listens on radio might confuse them for Leaders of Men

Mr. Ayo

Iggles just need to burn the clock here.

TAKE NOTES SHANNY!