Were you watching on Thursday? I was, and I still don’t believe it. Wednesday lost the away leg nil-4 to Dick Town (aka Petersborough), a gap that no side in EFL playoff HISTORY had ever overcome. But Wednesday scored two in the first half, allowing the supporters to dream and causing Dick Town to undrop its bollocks.
In the 2nd half, the visitors played like a Gravy Tits side away to City of Men. They wouldn’t have attacked the Wednesday goal if they had pulled their keeper. Still…the 70th minute 3rd was all the now-exhausted Owls could muster during 90 minutes.
They’d get 6 extra, and Dick Town tried the match official’s patience. 9 times out of 10, that’s a successful (if gutless) strategy. But this time…they fucked around and found out. 6 minutes went up on the board, but I saw the ref tap his watch at least once (which is quasi-sign language for “add another minute”). So, as the 7th minute ticked away, Dick Town’s body language was “alright, job done.”
But the whistle didn’t blow. Play on. They’d need to gain possession, or at least make another clearence of any danger. They did neither. A cross found its way into the box, bounced pass both the main attacker and defender, with an also-marked 2nd sticking a boot in to slide the 4th miraculously home.
The crowd reaction can’t be described, you just had to see and hear it. And now, somehow…the sides had to go another half hour.
Good news? Number 5 also went in off an Owl head. Bad news? Said Owl was defending his own goal, and Dick Town led 5-4 on aggregate. Lucky for Wednesday, there is no “away goals” rule any more. They only needed one equalizer tp force pennos – and they got it. Now, I kind of expected Dick Town to just forfeit. Instead, they missed while Wednesday rifled in 5 no-doubters, on to Wembley.
They’ll get Barnsley in the League One playoff final, Hippo watching them beat Bolton as of this writing.
Championship bracket is set as well, with Luton Town taking on Coventry City. Either would be an amazing story in the Prem, having been together in League Two only 5 years ago. But we all want to see one of the “celebrity” Prem managers forced onto the narrow touchlines of Kenilworth Road next season. So lets have it, Luton.
League Two plays both of their ties this morning, so you can ignore the Redshite/Bonesaws ball-gargling on USA. I’m just going to pretend nothing of import is going on there, and hope for the best.
See y’all in the comments.
I like National Treasure, because Baffert cheats.
Quick question…does one have to bet to collect winnings? Because I may have forgotten that step.
Sunday Gravy Test Kitchen is in full swing. This will be a fun one.
I’m doing another Duck Week — today it’s the breast with a pepper-coriander crust, pickled cherries, mushroom barley risotto, and roasted brussel sprouts.
Sounds fantastic. I love duck so very much.
Anyone watching the LIV and let journalists die tour?
I have so many questions, beginning with: is Uncle Joe in prison now?
He lives rent-free in the insane asylum that is MTG’s cerebellum.
Lotsa free space in there
Awesome todbit from a reporter’s account of his recent trip back to Kyiv:
“I saw one woman with a tote bag that read, “Sex is cool, but Putin’s death is better.”
Arse end of the Table got much simpler. 2 of Everton, Leeds, Leicester will go down. Everyone else (but Ded Sham Town) hath survived the gauntlet.
It was touch and go there for a bit but goddamn it’s good to remain in the bigs.
We can build on this!
Just be On the Beach in 8 days!!
We’ve got a beach there! A bit rocky but it’s still a beach.
Arsenal bottle their best chance so far because two guys are standing close enough to piss in each other’s pockets when the pass comes through.
If Arteta’s going to experiment with different formations to see what might work next season this is a fine game to do it, but holy fuck does this team not understand this one at all.
Does the Nottingham Forest locker room have a regular-size toilet or a little john?
“Oh neat, Arsenal is on broadcast TV this morning…” – RTD, moments before Arsenal falls behind 1-0 to a team I’ve never even heard of outside of a Kevin Costner movie
They can’t catch City, no one else can catch them, Martinelli’s out hurt, Arteta decided to try a different system with Partey playing out-of-position and Trossard and Jesus on the field at the same time.
I’m a little surprised they’re only down 1.
I do want to be clear, however, that all those things above being true, Arsenal have still managed to produce a not only terrible but also very dull performance. In its own right that’s been impressive.
The Cleveland Browns?
Washington Generals or Houston Texans?
Congratulations on the result, Hippo!
Holy fuck, pretty sure I’mma have a stroke regardless. I wish the Shite were officially out of Shempions but at least we are very close.
Bonesaws and Men Untied each need 1 point from 2 fixtures remaining to relegate the Shite to Zooropa.
Villa need to match Spurs’ result next Sunday to make Europe.
Everton need….something, but much more feasible now. Feels better than 50/50, I’ll take it.
IT’S HIPPO TIME!!!!
What the hell! Gooooooooaaaaaaalllllll!
BIG YERALD WOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOLY SHIT YES BUHLEE DAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
Damn Hippo! Is he attacking villagers along the Nile again?
Of course they give 10 minutes of extra time in the Liverpool game.
aaaaannnnnnnddddd Villa ruins Hippo’s day
Every time they show the Man U fans I just think “so many bad sunburns in progress there”
Such a pale, pasty people.
“It’s deep and it’s terrible”
English footy announcers are simply the best.
um, um…things Deanna Favre has never said?
Half correct.
The reverse halves would be correct/incorrect for anyone laying with Visanthe Shiancoe.
“De Gea picked up the Welshman beautifully!”
/Buddy Cole has entered the chat
Antony must be a hardcore communist because he’s dedicated to not using his right foot.
The lack of killer instinct from Unitd is quite concerning. Not just because we could drop points today, but also because this has been an issue for years.
That +11 goal differential looks out of place in the top 6 in the standings.
I speak pidgin hippo and have no fucking clue what any of that meant
Announcer “That Mitro goal really has put the cat amongst the pidgeons. ”
Hippo nods.
My cat is intrigued by these announcers, and wishes to subscribe to their newsletter.
I don’t care what he says, I just love to hear him talk! And yes, I hear him in my head.
Get outta here, Dee.
I’m about 50-50 whether Hippo is talking about real soccer or the bits and bots of his Soccer Manager future league
#MeToo
Goddamn, I’m really jonesing for some NFL football right now.
Miiitttrrroooooooo
X2
This seems relevant to our commenters…I was Team Dog until I saw it…
“Yeah, fuck you, too.”
That’s what makes cats so cool. They still have a little bit of wild in them, and you never know how/when it will manifest. Keeps you on your toes!
DAMN SKIPPY! And when you have their trust and (very grudging) affection, you know it was hard-earned.
Mighty Whitey gets scored on, Bitter Blues get scored on.
I know we see this all the time that it seems routine, but people really don’t know how impressive and difficult those precision passes along the sideline are. It really is like threading the needle
the weighting of passes is probably the thing that most noticeably differentiate the highest level of competition (noticed when watching lower division playoffs)
Speaking of passes, I’ve not seen anyone else but Broom execute that long, looping, delicately curving pass onto the foot of a racing attacker.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yH9a9XY2ZM&ab_channel=VERIFFootball
It’s a thing of beauty
“I’ve not seen anyone else but Broom….” covers a lot of ground.
GGGEEEEETTTTT IINNNNNNNN, Villa!
/all coming up Hippo
//think a point suffices for Very Disappointing Everton
Rendering of Hippo, currently:
Happy Saturday. I love United are wearing their beautiful green jerseys today. God I hope they win
With apologies to yeah right – humanity needs a Men Untied win, to keep the filthy goddamned Shite out of 4th position
https://twitter.com/CameraguyRob/status/1659919674929299457?s=20
and issue our MOST PASSIVELY AGGRESSIVE apology EVAR
Ivan Toney-less Praise Beesus are winning away to Spurs. Still not sure that would keep the latter out of Zooropa entirely, but amusing nonetheless.
Stockport and Salford are all square on aggregate, watching that instead.
Fuck Brentford with a bag of rusty hammers.
Now, on to defeat Uncle Woy!
Hello good people.
Gotta follow up on a garden pest conversation that RTD and I had last week. It looks like my stuff is the same paraffin oil based stuff you have tried. It works well here, sadly I guess your pests are much more robust. Think US football player vs. Italian soccer “star”. My spider mites will take a dive in a heartbeat.
Pictured: 2Pack’s pests:
&ct=g