Sexy Friday – 20230519

TGIF! Couple of great news items from this week: 1) There will be no more forced releasing of a certain sea creature here for several months. 2) Your famous weekly advice column will continue despite the temporary cessation of regular sea creature releasing. But enough of that, let’s get ready for next Monday’s Mock Draft. (Dammit, use a tag or two Horatio)

Survival – Personal Edition

Just to clarify, I don’t know what that draft subject will be. This isn’t a draft prep blog. What I do know is that all of us are doing it while “working”. To that end, I want to give some tips on how to “work” while researching and submitting your Mock Draft picks going forward.

  • As Charmslinger says, the best separation is preparation. Unlike his DONKS, WOO! career, we want this to be beneficial to us. First, make sure your monitor(s) is(are) not immediately viewable by folks walking by or standing in the entrance of your office door. If you are a peon in a cubicle this will be a little more difficult, but it’s still possible. Strive for greatness and a proper office with a door. If you’re in an open office space and have a dedicated desk, get a privacy screen for the monitor and a tiny mirror to monitor (pun intended) who is behind you. Even if you have a shared desk, still make use of the privacy screen.
  • Open a second browser window to your company’s intranet site. Make sure you are proficient at window swapping with your keyboard by using Alt-Tab (for Windows) and Command-Tab (for Macs). Anytime you want to go to the mock draft window, first go to the intranet window. That way only one Alt/Command-Tab press is necessary to go back to the intranet window and hide the shame of your latest sad Mock Draft submission.
  • You’ve done the prep, but haven’t gotten the sep. Time for some smooth talking. Blame the search engine. You were researching something and this web site came up in the link. You’re not sure why, but you’re looking to see why it came up and if there actually is anything useful there despite all appearances.
  • Blame your browser and coworkers. Say someone set the home page to this web site. Or say you were having trouble connecting to some sites, so you’re diagnosing your issue by visiting other known sites that should be working.
  • Blame the website. You were on a site and a popup appeared that you mistakenly clicked on while trying to scroll.
  • Blame your email. A vendor emailed you a link and you though it was work related and clicked on it, not suspecting it wasn’t work related.
  • Lastly, just use your personal mobile phone for personal web surfing. Make sure it’s not connected to the company’s WIFI of course. This is why you pay for a data plan. Be aware work supplied mobile phones will be monitored. Do not use them.

There you have it. Your stupid job under their stupid policies remains intact. As well as your paycheck. And your useful contributions to Monday’s Mock Drafts, and every other weekday’s comment section. Thank you for your service.

Click here to get to commenting

Survival – Species Edition

Time to put the sexy in Friday!

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to what’s most important: Commenting and drinking!

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Mr. Ayo
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Gumbygirl

Fuck, I’m tired. See yinz tomorrow, here’s a classy one!

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Brick Meathook

hello

yeah right

Hey neighbor.

litre_cola

Just finished working 14.5 hours. That was long.

WCS

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yeah right

I don’t EVEN have the dedication to do that shit anymore.
You’re a goddamn warrior!

litre_cola

8 hours at day job, 6.5 at the resto. I may be getting too old for this.

yeah right

Did 4 years of hard labor with the two jobs when I was married to the dearly departed former Mrs right.

It’s like playing in the NFL.

Short fucking shelf life.

litre_cola

I want to quit the resto, but I enjoy it and make very good money there, it is just exhausting.
Plus if I leave day job at 50 and take my pension, I can work there and make up the diff in 3 shifts a week.

yeah right

Hell yeah. The long haul.

Dude, check out Faro Portugal.

We could totally kill the restaurant scene.

The long haul.

yeah right

I wasn’t sure if this worked for request line but I dig this tune.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN8nJFLu1Rk

yeah right

I’m about 6 months into my Portuguese lessons and it’s kinda getting there.
I spent the last 2 weeks conjugating verbs which is always fun.

Living in Southern California most of my life you pick up Spanish, broken Spanish and Spanglish so I’ve got some of that shit through osmosis.

Portuguese is almost that but not even that. It’s got French elements, Italian elements and some of the original hominid language.

I just dig learning new shit every day.

yeah right

Because I promised; Seamus, this bud’s for you.

Ole meus bom amigos e amigas!

TheRevanchist

ESPN could really use a show like Inside The NBA to make it interesting again. Stephen A Smith’s gimmick is pretty much done and annoying.

WCS

There was a time when it wasn’t done and annoying?

TheRevanchist

Good point.

Max Kelllerman used to be great on Friday night fights. Then ESPN ruined him with the SAS influence.

2Pack

Thanks Mr Ayo, I’m pouring myself a big cup of coffee to share with lady number 12 tonight.

On the survival, bust azz for 10-15 year’s earning a promotion that snags your own personal “management” office. Many workplace issues simply melt away.

Oh a d Marika says ciao Bello.

Last edited 11 months ago by 2Pack
2Pack

Dressed like that

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ballsofsteelandfury

Damn!

TheRevanchist

It’s much easier to hide the money if you lose all the receipts, cash the checks are mom n pop stores, and put all cash under floorboards.

Brocky

Spoiler

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Brocky

So I’ve got good news and bad news….

The good? I’ve convinced my roommate/parental figure to cut the cord on cable.

The bad? I didn’t expect him to turn in the cable boxes so quick, no I have access to play off sports

WCS

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2Pack

Sounds like a trip to the nearest sports bar to me.

Brocky

Lol that’s adorable

WCS

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herodotus450

yep

WCS

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i can haz obertime?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

THESE BOSTON CELTICS I CALL THEM THE LAS VEGAS RAIDERS CAUSE THEY KEEP BLOWING LEADS IN THE SECOND HALF AND IT’S PROBABLY GOING TO CAUSE RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY TO HAVE A STROKE.

TheRevanchist

The Raiders had leads at the half?

Fronkenshteen

Okay, I guess I’ll be the giggling dummy to notice the girl in the last picture looks like she’s shooting a laser out her heinie.
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Gumbygirl

Sexy Friday‽ Interrobang!

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Sharkbait

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SonOfSpam

Trying to splooj-shame the pitcher, glad he got ejected.

Senor Weaselo

Can we stop learning from the Domingo German School of Dumbassery?

Sharkbait
SonOfSpam

But Arizona hockey is so successful.

Sharkbait

It’s moreso the fact that the Hartford Civic center was a dump 20 years ago when I was going there when I worked for the Bridgeport Sound Tigers. That building needs to be replaced before any team considers moving there.

Senor Weaselo

“Well there’s the XL Center.” -Wolfpack

WCS

This will just make him rage-punch the dwarf.

SonOfSpam

Which makes the dwarf harder than Chinese algebra

scotchnaut

As far as the speed/power combo at running back is concerned, the only guy that came close to Brown was Earl Campbell in his rookie year.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GoaYkqq_KA&ab_channel=DETLions38

Last edited 11 months ago by scotchnaut
King Hippo

I think the Earl Campbell Oilers were the team most people enjoyed watching the best, when their own team wasn’t playing.

At least it was for me. They made the 1p NBC window in North Cakalaky quite often.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s too bad that Houston never got another team after they left.

WCS

Roughnecks made the playoffs ppl 4git that imho

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I thought the Roughnecks were a Canadian team.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I thought they were key to the plot of Armageddon

BugEyedBoo

The only good scene in Armageddon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5-Hbj2AYNs

litre_cola

/Puts on Gametmiedecision hat

The Roughnecks are a Canadian Professional Lacrosse team.

scotchnaut

Thinking back to those early days of catching football on the teevee here and there, Bum Phillips was this weird guy that happened to be called ‘coach’ of the Oilers. I had no idea what he did. I knew that Landry and Knoll (and Lombardi) were serious people that guided their teams to victories. I had not a clue as to why a dude wearing a cowboy hat would be actively leading an entire football squadoo.

WCS

Asking for essentially five overtimes again isn’t too much, right?

King Hippo

tell teh #BFIB 2 up there game and hit EIGHT homers 2nite

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Celtics sure are good at getting themselves into situations where they are basically playing for their playoff lives.

scotchnaut

Jim Brown died a second time today-here’s the first time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLpFfZjKhWU&ab_channel=Movieclips

King Hippo

Dying twice? Hey, sommet he can bond with Black Jesus about!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

#14 is what Jim Irsay’s dreams look like.

WCS

Without having to count, I already know who you mean.

King Hippo

which is good b/c the penis is notorioUsly bad at maths smgdh

WCS

You really are stumbling into Creed Bratton non-sequitur territory.

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King Hippo

I take this as the finest of compliments. The brink of madness waves back at all y’all, even if yinz imaginary.

King Hippo

Just wait until your kids are old enough for ya to share the “Wu-Tang Financial” skit with them. Best day* of one’s life.

*apart from that first opium high

WCS

Lil’ WCS turns seven next week, which is halfway to high school.

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King Hippo

Hey, 7 was when I let my oldest watch the “Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo” so if you want to be as kewl a parent as Hippo…

blaxabbath

I bet Snyder was his blow pal at the owners meetings/coke orgies.

blaxabbath

How much do Hawaiian folk hate mainlanders moving there? I’m cool and i aim to assimilate — but i am going to be taking posession of some of that land, like it or not, Tonto.

King Hippo

Warn any who cross you that they risk angering the Fire God. Works every time.

WCS

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King Hippo

Alls Hippo can say is GOOD GODDAMN!!!