Has everyone had just the bestest day? Since I’m the only (living) Wolven Sort around (paging Warthog!), I knew y’all would have. Talk about el beisbol if you want, but know that I will be quietly judging you for doing so.
Ballsy: And he will be not so quietly judging me for my proclivities.
Washington (-26.5) at Stanford (7:00, FS1)
Mighty big line, for a team who should have lost to Sparky last weekend. But bad weeks happen in the JV-verse, just like the random good half that the Trees played to shock Colorado. Since then, they’ve done the square root of fuckall. Hippo just loves this Washington cheerleader pic, ok???
Ballsy: Boy, Stanford really dropped in quality, didn’t they? I’m really curious as to what happened. Did they all of a sudden realize they had academic standards and forgot to tell the coach? Something really weird happened there… Also, I aim to please.
Tennessee (-3.5) at Kenfucky (7:00, ESPN)
Neither of these has any shot at the SEC East (which will be settled when Mizzou goes between the hedges next Saturday), but this could still be kind of watchable.
Ballsy: WCS will back me up on this since he’s all about geography: HOW THE FUCK is Mizzou in the SEC EAST???
/Looks at map
// Looks at SEC division standings
So I guess they didn’t want to split up the Alabama schools?
Pussies!
Ohio State, THEEEEEE (-14.5) at Wisconsin (7:30, NBC)
The Tree Nutz still have to get their offense right, despite having the player who really should (but won’t) win the Heisman (Marvin Harrison’s namesake kid). Bucky Badger, on the other hand, will be happy to avoid the shutout. As uncomfortable as it is, Hippo must root for tOSU to win out, as I don’t trust the B1G nor the NCAA to keep Lesser Harbs’ cheating arse home for the holidays.
Ballsy: I like cheese curds. I also like Pam Poovey and she’s from Wisconsin
Colorado (+17) at UC-Los Angeles (7:30, ABC)
OK, fine. I won’t ignore this completely, but I really have nothing to say.
Ballsy: No hatred for Chip Kelly?? No hate for Coach Prime?? WHERE THE HELL IS FOZZ WHEN YOU NEED HIM??
Oregon State (-3.5) at Arizona (10:30, ESPN)
Only one Raging Semi of a Tweaker option, but it could be quite tasty (as the line hints). BEAR DOWN FOAR Midterms pretty much ruined Wazzu a few weeks ago. Niiiiiiiiiice Beaver lost much of its national attention after an earlier loss to those same Cougars – but have been an absolute machine ever since. Win this week, and that Very Last Civil War with Quack Attack could have massive implications for both. Imagine all the rivalry fights November will bring, with realignment on the horizon!
Ballsy: Teh Hippo brings up a really good point. You should absolutely be watching the Last Days of the PAC 12. Like senior year in high school, a lot of crazy shit will happen because people are leaving and no one gives a shit anymore.
Foo Fighters killed it on SNL but you already knew that.
Unapologetic Foo Fighters fan here.
Well you’re not gonna be Pro-Foo
Always out there fighting foo.
“I love the FoO Fighters!” – Sarah Huckabee Sanders
universe: “Fozz, where is the one part of your body where you would experience ht emost pain?”
Fozz” Well, th einside part of my bad knee.
Jniversies: “Oh, well here we go.”
(I throw a log down againstanotehr onek it reboudns, and slams directly into th einside part of my bad knee)
I saw stares, cursed like two epilipetic sailors, adn throught the day, watched my ikneed swell like a rotten emlon. melon
I did the same thing except it rebounded and hit my face. Gave me a cut like the one the narrator describes in Fight Club.
Beer, bourbona nd a gummie. okay
yes
goods are goods tonight
I’m drinking herbal tea tonight, so maybe I’ll be slightly less chronically dehydrated for a bit!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8plWr2ekeE&ab_channel=JAYKOOL
5-3 (3-2) and suddenly back in Big 12 (+2) Champeechip Match contention.
Nothing makes sense, life is weird dream, WVU screws itself. Eat Arby’s.
Pantera always brought out the best in those two.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1pRZauWIAo
I want some sushi now….
Alright I think I had enough green punch that was allegedly rum, Midori,nand sour mix; making myself a proper cocktail and then going to sleep.
Sleep well.
Brush your teeth first!
dude is shooting absinthe into his urethra
You say it like it’s a bad thing
oh no stones being thrown from this glass house
That’s the Chechen way to drink it
Da.
Omikase.
Matt Gaetz sees that how Heim got busted tonight and pulls out his little black middle schoolers book….
“I would never…oh that’s the color of the book?”
–Matt G.
We’re gonna see you next weekend, yeah?
Fri pm through Mon am
Saturday thru Tuesday morning.
It’s a not a competition.
No flash photography allowed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8MAHQhKe7Q
Friday night crew!
I’m impressed that the Texas fans who stayed til the end to boo aren’t also armed.
5-3. Welcome to the Big Ten, Coach Fickell.
Two Halloween parties in the books, more than hit my quota for the year.
I made a handsome Fred Flintstone when I weighed over 300.
I stopped at 339 before I corrected myself.
I haven’t worn a costume since.
Bet the last time all these fine Texas housewives were this quiet was when it came time to keep down the news of their high school abortions.
Dbacks wisely not calling for the save from Byung-Hyun Paul.
It’s already a good day when my Cherries get all 3 points.
I HAVEN’T SEEN THIS MANY RED HATS ADVANCING ON TV SINCE KEN CHEESEBRO WALKED WITH ALEX SMITH WHILE SIGNALING THEIR MOVEMENTS ON THEIR ATTACK ON THE CAPITOL DURING THE JANUARY 6TH INSURRECTION!!!
I would throw the fuck down on that Brother Brick.
This is a little strip mall place in Playa del Rey, same as Mo’s and next to the Harbor Room.
This joint is as Japanese as a teenager in a Zero crashing into an aircraft carrier.
They always got good tea. I don’t make green tea that good.
Wow, I bet that looked great after they cooked it!
They boiled them thoroughly just the way I likes it!
Albacore, salmon, yellow tail and a California roll?
and tuna. Maybe Toro.
Salmon avocado roll
Hard to suggest steroids have ruined this World Series….
SNEKS ALIVE!
Ford.
Are you a human? We make vehicles for humans. Buy a Ford, Human.
Man these Fox HD cameras are good. I could damn near see the outline of Jennie Finch’s penis even as she crossed her legs in those dark pants.
Public service announcement: Do NOT watch the new Jennifer Lawrence movie on Netflix no matter how naked she gets.
I had to watch Saving Private Ryan in its entirety to wash the stank of that movie off.
I wasn’t sure you could do unsexy naked Jennifer Lawrence but they made that happen.
90 minutes I’ll never get back.
Please. You Portuguese think anything that isn’t cigarettes and paella is some kind of infectious bat disease.
Needs more sheep’s milk cheese.
YOU NEED MORE SHEEP CHEESE!!!!!
Bet your ass!
“No Hard Feelings”? That premise is literally my teenage fantasy come to life.
It was … fine. Bad plot, mixed cast, she was almost sympathetic, but yeah bad plot/writing.
There were no laughs at all.
Ashli Babbitt could learn a thing or two from the Arizona Diamondbacks about taking a shot and continuing on unfazed…
But maybe that’s why the Diamondbacks are still alive in October and she’s not.
Penix didn’t pull out in time.
Like the Yankees didn’t win a bunch of their championships against squads who didn’t even belong in the WS…..
We haven’t heard from Bastard Man, so dunno if we are to BOW DOWN!! or not.
Having flashbacks to last night’s SNEKS meltdown.
BOW DOWN!
Round these parts we’re used to smoking Trees.
Just rake up that forest floor when you’re done.
Time to #GirthUp, Penix.
JV BLEEERGH bail out
Those suits down by the field look pretty awesome. I’d watch a game there.
Like most ASU graduates, Merrill Kelly found success after years away from that place.
Goddamn that meat plate looks good.
The dude who does the Capital One Banking Reimagined commercial who like laughs through every statement he makes —
I’d like to see Hamas surprise him.
he just can’t help it, their douchey bits are just SO CLEVER!!
Christian Walker: Professional Liability
THIS GUY MIKE PENCE I CALL HIM CHRISTIAN WALKER BECAUSE HE’S A BIBLE THUMPER AND HE JUST STOPPED RUNNING.
The Dr. Mrs. realized that the upstairs roomba didn’t run today and I swear to God it was with something like glee that she declared that now she’d have to vacuum upstairs manually.
Hey you might parlay this into some lovin
“MAYBE SHE HURTS HER BACK ON THOSE STAIRS AND YOU GOT YOURSELF A MEDIMAMMA!!!!!”
-K HIppo, Sliding to the next bead on his Rosary
She can manually vacuum here any time she wants
“We can’t believe our son committed suicide after war.”
Pan out to show folded up flag surrounded by bottles of whiskey…..
Young black man in Georgia holding a glass bottle in a football stadium?
I think the Rangers will continue to be cursed until they welcome Chuck Norris, the One True Texas Ranger, back to Arlington. Or Arlen. Wherever it is.
Funny story from about 25 years ago. I worked in IT/LAN Admin (aging myself), and a guy from our TX office came out here for some training. Older guy, very friendly, and one day we talked about taking vacations…
Texan: “Last year, me and the wife went to Arlen, had a great time.”
Me: “Wait…really?”
Texan: “Yeah, it was great!”
Me: “Wow, I can’t believe it. I thought that place was fictional.”
Texan: (confused)
Me: (confused)
Texan: “Yeah, mostly stayed around Dublin.”
Me: “OHHHHHHHHHH”
blaxabbath: (confused)
He went to Ireland. But in his TX accent it sounded like Arlen.
blaxabbath: (Ireland)
I’ll say this much – any GM who takes Caleb or that Maye doofus over Harrison? Deserves the firing they’ll get.
Especially when the Penix is right there!
Which is why I’d be happy around #5, for the Donks.
They’ll fuck it up. You’re rooting for Faded Glory Football sir.
True. Fatty Payton seems like a shmuck who loves JJ McCarthy.
HAVE FAITH!!
Fridge outlasted Matthew and Luke among Perrys.
That wheelchair must be weapons-grade
On the bright side it probably doesn’t have to support all ten toes.
The funny thing about people from Texas is that they’re basically just people from California.
Chandler Bing dead. Could he be any younger?
I guess that jacuzzi is the hottest place to be found in LA most nights.
anti-vaxxer I bet
And wouldn’t you look at that — Covid didn’t kill him.
He lasted 2 Winehouses.
But shit this is sad. Because of the addiction which was definitely involved.
Add[Hic]tion is how Dr David Chao sums up the number of empties in his bottle collection.
I can’t say that I’ve seen a single minute of Friends yet I somehow know who they all are.
Penix went DEEP yo.
“The sportswriters call me ‘Anti-Favre’, why is that? Is that bad?”
Snow Game Intensifies
Holy shit is The Fall of the House of Usher is fuckin awesome, especially about what to do when life hands you lemons.
Started watching last night, and yeah, the lemons thing was amazing.
Lots of really great acting in my opinion, which really sells it.
Yeah, and Flanagan has got “whatever it is, I’m watching” status now.
Was thinking of checking out one of the San Jose card rooms, but then I remembered that they have a huge rake and probably a super long wait for a table.
Kinda crazy that it’s legal (and possibly even required by state law?) to rake $5 no matter what the size of the pot, or to charge people $1 just for the opportunity to bet and lose money on a hand of blackjack, yet we’re not allowed to play poker for real money online where the rake is much less or do any sort of sports betting, which again is far more consumer friendly.
If George Santos isn’t the posterchild for repealing the Apportionment Act of 1911, bullshit gambling laws like you describe should be.
We playing craps in Vegas?
I’ll play some craps as long as it doesn’t interfere with poker
Taking? Sure. Playing? Never really learned. Maybe I will get caught up in the moment and throw chips around like Sharon Stone in Casino.
As long as you don’t wear underwear, just like her.
Does a thong count?
It’s not even a little tiny bit difficult
That works out, because I won’t be even a tiny bit sober.
That can’t be true. I’ve never understood that game.
At the most basic level, you put money on the pass line and then it either goes away or has more money join it.
All the business about 7 and 2 and 11 and making numbers is helpful to know and makes the game a lot more fun, but the croupier will make sure your bets are right even if you have no idea what’s going on. And you REALLY don’t need to understand any of the prop bets in the middle of the table because the odds on those are all shit, with the possible exception of the numbers bets or buying a number.
Umm, Hippo I went to NC State, and I hope I am still alive.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cotard%27s_syndrome
Hippo can has the memory of a gnat!
According to the unwashed masses on Twitter, boxing is still corrupt. That’s comforting.
Golden Shower Bears up 2 TDs on Troi Boiz. The Curse of Balls’ Niece??
USC being suddenly horrid is delightful
/except that ND benefitted
Having a Halloween party. You’re all invited.
Save some Monster Mashed potatoes for me!
Crack the whip across Lowratio’s chaps for me!
Good thing my Fat Slob costume still fits.
Hey, I’m already wearing that!
Fine I’ll be a 54 year old Jeopardy champ who got married in 1995.
What?
/prays for blizzard in Donks/Chefs tomorrow
WOO SNOW GAME IN FORT COLLINS (on CBSSSSNET)
SWEET
Gonna press my luck (no whammies) after being right TWICE this afternoon.
Arizona sends the Beavers home unfulfilled. (D. Favre raises fist in solidarity)