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Back in the Saddle to Close October – JV NFL and Lesser Footy

King Hippo

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Damn, I will miss October.  Perfect month, with conference schedules heating up, NFL taking things up a notch, being able to shut down the HVAC system and enjoy a nice window-fed breeze.

That said, November ALSO kicks ass, so no need for mourning.

How will Chelski react to blowing a 2-nil lead to their Gooner rivals?  We’ll find out early, with Praise Beesus coming to town (7:30, USA).

Only three fixtures in the 10:00 window, with King’s Afrikan Water Pistols hosting Team Knifey in sort of a Weaponry Derby (USA)?  One could also stream Palace/Spurs, which promises to be an interesting clash of styles.

Do not watch the Spotlight Shitshow of Wolves hosting Geordie Arabia (12:30, NBC).  Just fucking don’t.

Lots of Sunday action, only West Ham hosting Everton (9:00, USA) getting TV coverage.  The rest streams at 10:00, or 11:30 for the Manchester Derby (at Old Trafford).  Worth firing up the Peacock machine, at least for the first half.  MAYBE.  RedZone always wins, though.

This is maybe not quite the powerhouse JV NFL slate we had last week, but Hippo still thinks it’s KEWL.

Okiehoma (-10) at Kansas (Noon, Fox)

Give Fox some credit for going outside the box a little!  Nah, they probably just didn’t have any real alternatives.  Once again, put Steerfuckers North on upset alert.  It is always plausible with them.

West By God Virginia (+7) at UCF (Noon, FS1)

The Impending Doom Bowl?  Either team could really go into a tailspin here.  The Hitler Mice had Okiehoma ded to rights last week, and let ’em off the hook (Denny Green-style).  Will that stink linger, and beat them again this week?  Neal Brown, welcome back to the hot seat.  It really missed you.

Clemson (-10) at NC State (2:00, CW)

How bad does one have to suck to be a DOUBLE DIGIT home dog, to an unranked, 3-ACC loss squadron?  Welcome to hayell.  Population Hippo.

Georgia (-14.5) v. Florida live from DUUUUUVVVVVAAAALLLLL (3:30, CBS)

The World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party may have lost some of its lustre, but this is still too many points.  Especially with Human Cheat Code Brock Bowers out.  Also, maybe bet the under.  This one will be defensive.

Original Recipe Big Love (+18) at Texas (3:30, ABC)

MOAR LIEK Tex-ass, innit?  Those Stormin’ Mormons are a dangerous opponent, especially for a green, backup quartered back.  Steerfuckers South, also on Hippo-decreed upset alert.  This is clearly good value, GAMBLOR-wise.

Oregon (-6.5) at Team Secular Big Love (3:30, Fox)

So much afternoon Big Love delight!  This is the game of the day, and will likely determine who gets to face Washington for the Last PAC-12 Title EVAR.  Really looking forward to this.

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Doktor Zymm

Anyone have a favorite place on New Zealand’s South Island?

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SonOfSpam

Probably a McDonald’s or two.

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scotchnaut

“I do but I’m not going to tell you because I think you’re going to focus an Isreali laser beam on it.”

-Some Wacko

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herodotus450

Miami actually kneeled! To run out the clock in a time game to get to overtime

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Mr. Ayo

Other Hippo, WTH is your coach on about?

https://twitter.com/cjzero/status/1718378246553620964

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King Hippo

I know Steve Smith (baby puncher/ex-Black Panther/Utes graduate) was on ESPN Gameday this morning. My best guess was that he said sommet about NC State being a “basketball SCHOOL” when making his pick this morning.

/we refer to Coach Doeren as “Sling Blade” for a reason

//still, joke’s on Smith – we ain’t been a basketball school since last goddamned CENTURY (we is all about Women’s XC now)

3
King Hippo

YEEEEEEEHHHHHAAAAAWWWWWWWWWW

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Even though I was rooting for South Africa, that was a deeply unsatisfying final. Just a messy, ugly game.

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Doktor Zymm

Probably your fault for rooting for South Africa. I’m at home and refuse to pay for Peacock and was too lazy to find an illegal stream so I’m glad to hear I didn’t actually miss an awesome game!

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scotchnaut

I feel it in my bones-Pitt’s QB Christian Veilleux, a transfer from the University of Lyon Lions* at Montreal will lead a comeback vs Notre Dame.**

*What? The Illinois Illini is a thing!

**This is the Frenchiest game ever

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herodotus450

This Kansas QB Bean I call him Refritos because he’s redeemed himself on a second chance.

1
Horatio Cornblower

South Africa with a yellow card? In rugby?

Did he hit someone with a lead pipe?

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Doktor Zymm

It’s easier than you might think to get a yellow or red card in rugby! You can get them both for tackling too HIGH and too LOW if it is blatantly on purpose!

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herodotus450

This Kansas QB Bean I call him my MIL’s cooking because he STINKS

1
scotchnaut

“Bean should have been soaked overnight-then he would have been ready.”

-yeah right, college football announcer

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SonOfSpam

Or shoulda been flicked.

-D. Favre

4
SonOfSpam

hearing this in Jay Sherman’s voice

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scotchnaut

Just put away a few cords of wood that I got from some dirty, God-full Mennonite. I hadn’t had any alcohol for a couple weeks but if today isn’t Beer Day, I don’t know what day is. I just hope I can lift the bottle to my lips.

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King Hippo

You should have paid the heretic extra to bring it INSIDE, silly goose! Or make your brain-addled sons do it.

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scotchnaut

Here’s the problem

-I don’t want ‘Believers’ in my house.

-My two dumb punks are still in concussion protocol and they have to stay in a tent that I’ve put up in the back yard.*

*they have to pay extra if they want a straw mattress

Last edited 2 years ago by scotchnaut
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Horatio Cornblower

Mattress!?

-Lowratio

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Gumbygirl

I got my Covid and flu shots yesterday. I sweated like a pig all night, no sleep because of the Nano’s zooming through my bloodstream, and today my arm feels like it’s going to fall off. Someone needs to feed me before I die to death.

2
scotchnaut

Maybe you have buttery muscles like I do. It’s a legit problem, according to a flighty, over-dramatic nurse I met in a bus one time.

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Gumbygirl

I am probably 40- 45% butter.

0
yeah right

That COVID booster hurt my arm like a motherfucker. Took 4 days for that to get better.

1
King Hippo

I got mine in one arm, flu shot in other. No problem sleeping on either shoulder, even first night.

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scotchnaut

Shoulders are your strength and your weakness-in summation, you are an ungulate of many contrasts.

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Gumbygirl

I went with the non- dominant arm for both theory.

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I did the same, it was fine.

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Doktor Zymm

The whole problem with no appointments is that I still haven’t gotten around to dropping in to get my shots. This morning I realized yesterday would have been the perfect day to do it, but now I won’t have time for at least another week and a half

1
yeah right

Kick ass walk today. Time for some kitchen work and a full day of sports. Unless I get crunk and start watching old movies again.

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Gumbygirl

I vote for crunk!

1
King Hippo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXaOUTKa0wU

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SonOfSpam

My other afternoon opinion is that Secular Big Love is finally gonna pay for not having a cromulent offense today and Oregon rolls em.

Nothing personal against Utah schools, but I think they have a Sad Saturday in the Beehive State.

1
King Hippo

Gosh golly, we just hope everyone has a pleasant afternoon! – Citizens of Utah-a-diddly

2
Col. Duke LaCross

Lining up in the shotgun on 4th and 1 in the first quarter had me shutting off the TV. Though it’s good to see Luke Getsy getting some practice reps as the Utes OC on Saturdays.

1
Horatio Cornblower

NBC is showing the Notre Dame game with Jason Garrett and nepo-idiot Jack Collinsworth announcing it?

This may not be the Seventh Seal, but it’s at least 4 or 5.

4
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Not sure why they bothered paying for the rights to the Rugby World Cup if they’re not even going to broadcast it.

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King Hippo

think I saw it was gonna be on CNBC

1
Dunstan

It is.

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Gumbygirl

It’s Jac. How dare you!

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Horatio Cornblower

Autocorrect got me again.

I am, sadly, fully aware of the pretentious spelling of his name.

1
King Hippo

Jac the Joc Sniffer!

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SonOfSpam

I don’t like Texas, but I think they’re gonna destroy Big Love.U.

Bet accordingly (on the Cougars).

1
WCS

Much like his lurid thoughts whenever Mother is around, Mike Pence has suspended his campiagn.

3
Horatio Cornblower

Oh man, I was just going to donate to his campaign, too.

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

That might be just the break he needs to compete.

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Gumbygirl

The fly on his head finally convinced him that nobody likes him. Sad!

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2Pack

https://www.greatitalianchefs.com/recipes/cacciucco-recipe-tuscan-seafood-stew

There was a restaurant in Marina di Pisa that made this. It was outstanding. I gotta figure out how to make it.

What say ye, Sir Yeah Right?

1
WCS

Setting up for another tip drill ending in Orlando.

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Horatio Cornblower

Yeah, sure, what the hell.

https://twitter.com/NoEscalators/status/1718303469642125400

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scotchnaut

Okie/Kansas are in a weather delay but I don’t see anything. Must be a vulnerable trailer park right next to the stadium or something.

1
King Hippo

Those bullshit lightning rules. NOT IN MAH DAY smgdh.

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TheRevanchist

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8BMoPMU/

Love a good song

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WCS

WVU-UCF (whatever Hippo calls them; I’ve lost track) is the very first Big 12 Conference game where both member schools are in the Eastern Time Zone.

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King Hippo

UCF is the Hitler Mice. Very simple.

5
WCS

ARM PUNT

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2Pack

Flipping between soccer and the Oklahoma – Kansas game. It would appear that Kansas is on to something here today.

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Horatio Cornblower

It appears that absolutely no one has picked up the option to show the UConn vs. Chestnut Hill College “football” game. Even CBSSssssssssports, or whatever the hell, has gone with Mass-Army.

And I can’t say I blame them one bit.

2
scotchnaut

/Meanwhile, up in Canada

“I’m gonna watch this UCONN/BC football game just because I can!”

-Anon.

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King Hippo

ACC Network

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ballsofsteelandfury

I take it no one saw El Clásico?

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WCS

¡El Assico! is much more entertaining in dumpster fire terms.

https://www.bannersociety.com/2019/9/9/20856722/iowa-iowa-state-rivalry-el-assico

1
scotchnaut

I saw a lot of moaning and groaning and guys rolling around on the ground-I thought it was gay porn.

3
Horatio Cornblower

Jesus, you really are watching BC v. UConn.

3
2Pack

Tonight’s hostesses on the Series A coverage seems nice enough. But she obviously did not get the memo on the dress code expectations. We expect better… which is to say… less…

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Horatio Cornblower

Pfft! Not even a shoulder for an agoraphobic ungulate!? For shame!

3
2Pack

A reminder of the standard here ppl…

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Horatio Cornblower

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ballsofsteelandfury

And more, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

2
Cecil Rhodes

What an outstanding match for Eddie the Undesirable and his band of infantrymen! The Empire prevails once again! Onward to glory!

7
Horatio Cornblower

That’ll do, Arsenal. That’ll do.

2
King Hippo

South Coast crowd chanting VAR is fucking shit!

0
WCS

Alright, let’s watch WVU vomit on themselves on national television. Again.

0
Horatio Cornblower

Wrexham beating up arch rivals Notts County in hot League Two action!

1
Horatio Cornblower

I really don’t think we need celebrations after penalty kick goals making it 4-0.

I mean, try not to convert one.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Spikes to the Achilles?

I’m thinking that’s a red car, followed by some homeopathic treatment, maybe a week or so in a dark room, and a shit ton of ayahuasca.

1
Horatio Cornblower

And Confucious say, name go in book.

1
WCS

Lowratio slipped some of Other Hippo’s stash into Horatio’s coffee.

2
Horatio Cornblower

Hot chocolate. Can’t stand the taste of coffee.

Oddly I love the smell.

2
WCS

Whatever the delivery system, it’s clearly in your bloodstream.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Clearly my references to Aaron Rodgers and Monty Python sketches have fallen flatter than Sheffield United’s performance today.

1
WCS

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Gumbygirl

Took me years to tolerate the taste, and I still rarely drink it. But I’ve always loved the smell. And I will absolutely crush a handful of coffee beans covered with dark chocolate. I need to get some from Trader Joe’s!

1
Horatio Cornblower

Sheffield United bringing in a lad from Scottish Premier League power (?) Hamilton.

We turn now to our resident expert on all things Scottish, Litre, for comment:

1
King Hippo

Team Knifey could use some sharpening smgdh

0
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PuM34db3Jn4&ab_channel=t0r0nt0t0r0

For liter, that lucky moutheurfuuckeur.

1
scotchnaut

Oh look, an Andy Reid ‘project’ is up to the usual hijinks.

https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/38757294/chiefs-wr-justyn-ross-placed-exempt-list-following-arrest

3
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Treats his players like sons, obviously.

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Horatio Cornblower

The difference is that Andy creates a line-up with his players and picks his sons out of a line-up.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Nketiah, have a fucking day!!!

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King Hippo

Ain’t nobody all liek Eddie! What have you done for me lately!!! today, chuh chuh

1
King Hippo

Good heavens, just imagine if BEARISTOCRATS!/Clippers du Merde was a MANDATORY SNF fixture.

0
litre_cola

I…..i am not hungover from the TOOL show!!!!

5
Horatio Cornblower

No hangover but finished in the money in the money in the monthly poker tournament and didn’t get to bed until about 3.

Then the cat crashed into my room at about 6:45 because it was time to go outside.

I’m a bit tired.

1
King Hippo

Gooners nae fucking with you at least. AND you can shit talk yer paw!

0
Horatio Cornblower

Poor guy’s 81 and Chelsea’s determined to make sure he doesn’t see 82.

0
King Hippo

Dad Rock level UNLOCKED!!

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I had to cut my bike ride short this morning due to….urgent gastric issues. This must be how Andy Reid feels during the fourth quarter.

2
WCS

Any time Andy took a weird timeout earlier in his career can be explained by him not discovering adult diapers yet.

2
King Hippo

They may only go up to 5XL.

1
WCS

Why do you think he lost weight?

1
Don T

That’s a job for Depends’ Hip Mumu

4
Brick Meathook

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2Pack

I think I’ll wrap up the garden reports today. I pulled most of it up this morning. Left in a few cherry tomatoes, parsley and the second zucchini planting to produce a bit more, or be killed by the frost that will soon come. It was a decent year. An odd late season here, stuff was all 4 weeks late. I usually close it out in early October. November I turn the soil over with this summers mulch… And the cycle begins again. The good earth.

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6
2Pack

The last of the veggies for the final fresh peperonata of the year.

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Don T

I got a white anturium that’s made it to 11 weeks (current status: getting bendy, will water). Up next: basil, for a month.

3
2Pack

My basil all got pulled up today. But it had a good season.

3
Horatio Cornblower

Doing the same with the last of mine. Had four straight days of sun and temps in the 70’s here this week, but frost is coming Monday and Tuesday.

Had a decent year overall, but probably too much rain for it to have been productive as it could have been.

2
2Pack

Same here Buddy. It was worldwide this year I guess.

2
Horatio Cornblower

So many tomatoes splitting before their time.

1
King Hippo

Ha!! An empty netter!!!

0
King Hippo

PRAISE BEESUS about to make it 3 in a row at the Bridge.

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Brick Meathook

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King Hippo

It’s your money. It’s YOUR arsehole.
DEMAND genuine Angel Pussy!

3
2Pack

Related

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WCS

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WCS

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Thought there’d be more of yinz left over from earlier.

3
King Hippo

Hippo is thinking RAPTURE again.

1
Brick Meathook

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1
WCS

“Mom found my what?!”

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King Hippo

so…why are you two out of alignment with CHRIST??

0
WCS

Other Hippo’s gone to plaid.

2
King Hippo

Plaid TWO-day
Plaid to-MAHR-uh
Plaid FOAREVER

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