Your Saturday Night Open Thread With Bonus Football!

Bettie-Paige-Christmas-pinup.jpg

It just doesn’t seem right that Buffalo is in a position whereby they need to win out (and need a bit of help) to get into the post-season but here we are.

To The Game!

Bills/Chargers:

-That Bolts D took a shit-kicking last week to the Raiders of all teams but if that’s what it takes to get rid of Staley, I’m on board with the embarrassment. It took the higher-ups way too long to address the disparity between supposed ‘defensive guru’ and their 29th-ranked defense. It might take a bit of time for the stink to dissipate though.

-The Bills finally look half-decent now that James Cook is being deployed properly. He’s had at least 100 yards from scrimmage the last four weeks and wadd ya know, they’re 3-1 during that stretch.

-Cook’s opposite number Ekeler is a struggler though-he’s running at a 2.8 ypc these last four fixtures. His numbers should improve from here on out because I do believe this team quit on Staley.

-Can’t Quite Finish: Buffalo’s six losses are by a combined 26 points. In fact, going back to their last 11 losses, they’ve all been by six points or fewer.

-Rock vs. Other Rock: It wouldn’t seem they were capable of it but the Chargers D did have success putting opposing qb’s on the ground, ranking sixth in that category. Contrast that with a Bills o-line (with quite a bit of help from a very slippery Allen) that has only allowed 19 sackeroos.

-Dicker? I Hardly…: Los Angeles has severe scoring woes but one player that’s doing his part is Dicker The Kicker-over the last two seasons his field goal percentage is 95% and he’s not missed a point after.

-The first question asked of new/placeholder Chargers coach Giff Smith? “Your first name, is it pronounced with a ‘J’ or a ‘G’?”

Go for it! (in the comments only, you’re too old for that shit)

5 4 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
99 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Brick Meathook

comment image

TheRevanchist

Everyone in the house has been sick for a week besides me. And, now, feels like the germs are starting their siege on me. Bummer.

herodotus450

comment image

TheRevanchist

Yep. I’ve definitely been penetrated.

WCS
WCS
Horatio Cornblower

Big win for the Fightin’ Horatios in the Clubhouse Derby against Senor’s St. John Redmen, uh, Storm, I think now, maybe? Anyway, 69-65 (nice!) in a back and forth game. Kept me from the late football, which I am now trying to atone for with some Hawai’i Bowl meth.

UConn without their center who is out with a tendon injury to his foot, which I’m sure is no big deal when you’re 7’2″, 280+, and jump up and down a lot.

Senor Weaselo

Good enough to keep it close if you’re lucky, the St. John’s motto since 2000!

Brick Meathook

comment image

Sharkbait

Only an hour and change left until the east coast drummer boy challenge ends.

Gumbygirl

I thought it was midnight on Christmas Eve night? 11:59+ on the 24th? Whatever, I’m still in!

yeah right

Still alive. TAJ scared the shit out of me when he was wrapping presents earlier with the music.

I beat him soundly in cribbage by the way.

One of life’s best lessons is humility.

Gumbygirl

You made Mr. Pickle sad, you monster! Careful, he goes from this

Mr-Pickle.jpg
Gumbygirl

To this!

JUMBOAUDREY2.jpg
Sharkbait

I thought it was 12:01 on Christmas Eve

Gumbygirl

You’re right. I looked up the rulez. A little over two hours and I make it! Pretty sure that will be one in a row

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m going to bed, so I guess I’ve made it!

jjfozz

That turnover just won me $28, my sons are overly impressed

ThePirateSloth

Cameron Dicker! My favorite kicker!

Game Time Decision

Spent like 4 hours wrapping presents, which is way too much time for something that will be undone in 10 minutes but meh glad to have it all done

jjfozz

Gift bags all day long.

Horatio Cornblower

comment image

Doktor Zymm

O AN YOU FANCY

Stick it in a plastic grocery bag and tie the end shut. Trash bag if grocery bag isn’t big enough.

Game Time Decision

For birthdays we have a tradition of presents being given in a pillow case as we ran out of time to wrap one year

Last edited 11 months ago by Game Time Decision
Game Time Decision

I tried but was overruled

makeitsnowondem

THESE NORTHWESTERN WILDCATS I CALL THEM OJ SIMPSON BECAUSE THEY ARE ASKING A WHOLE LOT FROM THEIR DEFENSE

King Hippo

I am being told the Secular Big Love glove did not fit, therefore we must acquit!

King Hippo

Never mind the earlier warning, looks like Pitino’s men shot their wad early.

yeah right

Wait! Was that a game of cribbage challenge from TAJ?

Bring that shit.

Brick Meathook

Did the pandemic kill SantaCon? I hope so.

comment image

jjfozz

Know your limits. I’m still trying to figure out minne

TheRevanchist

Watching some pee cock. Once I’m done, I’ll turn off the porn and catch up on the game.

WCS

Trump’s nightly routine before running for President.

King Hippo

Utah/NW is porn, just the kind where a lady slams your bollocks in a desk drawer repeatedly while pouring hot wax into your butthole.

ballsofsteelandfury

Don’t knock the hot wax till you try it!

King Hippo

judges Balls in WASP

(need to learn how to set a macro for this)

Brick Meathook

comment image

WCS

“+1!”

— Philadelphia

SonOfSpam

Don’t forget the Hawaii Bowl at 9:30 CST tonight. TWEAKER FIXTURE!

makeitsnowondem

I’m not going to pretend Northwestern are even a little bit fun to watch if you’re not a Northwestern fan, but they kind of are if you are.

WCS

That’s the same delusion Bears, Stillers, and Iowa Hawkeye fans have been saying!

comment image

jjfozz

mRs. fozz just advised me to slow down, so of course, i interpret that as “Full fucking speed ahead.”

King Hippo

pretty clearly a challenge to prove yer ITALIAN MANHOOD!

jjfozz

the worst thing you can ever tell me is “don’t do that”, i will do it, even if that means i will fail horriblye, or die.

WCS
Brick Meathook

Peacock? What the fuck is that?

makeitsnowondem

Some bird. It’s dumb as hell.

ballsofsteelandfury

In LA, it’s on NBC. Probably because it’s the Chargers.

Gumbygirl

Not out here in the desert. Boo. How many people have Paramount plus? I can kind of see the Amazon Prime games, everybody has that, but this doesn’t make sense numbers- wise. I’m surprised at the Shield, they’re such greedy goblins.

Gumbygirl

I meant Peacock, whatever.

ballsofsteelandfury

I have Paramount Plus and it’s pretty good.

I refuse to pay extra for Peacock.

Gumbygirl

I have Youtube tv,Max, and Amazon Prime.

ThePirateSloth

Peter is the all black kitten on the left, Oliver is the tuxedo kitten on the right, Matilda is the white mottled kitten in the back.

Matilda is the shyest, she stayed in there during my visit, but is friendly enough.

Coraline is not pictured because she is the brave ringleader who was laying on my back as I took this photo.

20231223_175555~2.jpg
ThePirateSloth

I did not name them, by the way.

Gumbygirl

I like the names! They are beautiful cats. I had a tuxedo years ago, his name was Wilbur Angus, aka Wilbur the Wonder Kitty. He was my moggie from Scotland. Best boy.

Horatio Cornblower

Mine is currently located under my bed, up against the radiator, surrounded by various boxes.

He’s a master at finding forts we didn’t even know we’d made for him.

makeitsnowondem

Merry gentlemen.

yeah right

Welcome and grab a cup of good cheer!

King Hippo

Weaselo’s Insta-Bake (Pitino premature ejaculation reference, to be clear) Johnny Cakes doing a hoopsball derby good against the Fightin’ Horatios? Today IS Voodoo Day!

jjfozz

goddamn, are youon shrooms, cause i undertsood onone of that

King Hippo

that’s because I ain’t make no sense yo

Gumbygirl

I think it might be St Johns vs Connecticut, basketball. But it could be something else entirely, that is the beauty of Hippoese.

jjfozz

Tomorrow is christmas eve. dinner at my mom in laws

christmas day, dinner at my sister’s house, with my wacked out mom and dementia addedl dad

christmas night at my wife’s aunt’s house – full of dickhead trumpites and religious whackos

also, fucking niners ravens game

i’ll be clacked out drunk, wagging my dick at people

nad i won’t care.

fuckign christmas

jjfozz

I watched teh Creator, holy fuck I mean drive the hole vietnam war thing the wasy hom,e drive it like the romans drove the nails on Christ. Fun tip: the vehicles in the air, had NO GODDAMN ROTORS, yet they piped in the rotor noise. Seirously< do fucking better.

jjfozz

Bourbon and beer buzz, trying to figure out the right balance. Or . . . drive this shit right offf the moterherfucking cliff

Doktor Zymm

I’m really enjoying Dredge. Who knew a fishing horror game would be so good?

jjfozz

where is it avaiable to watch?

BugEyedBoo

It’s a video game.

ThePirateSloth
ThePirateSloth

We’re fostering 4 rescue kittens and I went to check on them in our foster room before turning the game on.

I now have 3 kittens sleeping on me. I can not get up.

King Hippo

daaaaawwwwwww!

Hippo bows down to your superior Crazy Cat Man street cred.

hippofant

Kitten #4 🙁

ThePirateSloth

It’s the shyest one. Close enough to see me and the other kittens, but just out of arms reach and hiding in the cat bed.

They are 8 weeks, I think? Rescued from a lady who has 40+ cats in/around the house/property. This lady thinks she is doing a good thing by bringing in all the stray cats, but most of the cats taken from her are sick, or very shy because they aren’t getting much human interaction and/or are bullied by other cats.

WCS

That’s a call to animal control.

Doktor Zymm

KITTEH PICTURES PUHLEASE!!

King Hippo

sounds like a Downtown Abbey spinoff, innit?

BugEyedBoo

Some smartass has been cracking the whip on the NBC analysts and letting them know you can’t control your destiny; it’s preordained if it’s destiny.

King Hippo

He gets to go out from a pretty good peak, at least there’s that.

ballsofsteelandfury

Was he sick or something?

King Hippo

he had a seizure mid-game when he was at Minnesota. Scary shit. Apparently he had to take mini-leaves of absence this season, too.

WCS

Epileptic with blood clot disorder. Two completely unrelated issues that are bad enough on their own, but both simultaneous episode wouldn’t be great.

ballsofsteelandfury

It’s pretty incredible that we are in Week 16 and every single team in the AFC North has a winning record.

Last edited 11 months ago by ballsofsteelandfury
yeah right

Betty Page as the banner image?

You fucking rule, Scotchy!

ballsofsteelandfury

Indeed

Gumbygirl

Look at this stoner little drummer boy mouse on my tree! Completely baked, just like me!

20231223_170237.jpg
ballsofsteelandfury

I often thought Slowpoke was on the weed…

comment image?sqp=-oaymwEmCOADEOgC8quKqQMa8AEB-AG-AoAC8AGKAgwIABABGHIgZCg7MA8=&rs=AOn4CLACS4ja6coqMsJ6lruoV6ZmoA8RSQ

King Hippo

HA! I was trying to remember who that reminded me of, this 100%!

WCS

Luudes

King Hippo

Mike Tirico says Bills Mafia no longer need help if they win out, so here comes the stubbed toe!

WCS

comment image

WCS

NFL Script Writer #1: We’re going to have the Chargers win 35-3, right?
NFL Script Writer #2:
https://youtu.be/1XG2WdP2R4U?si=rESpMcTfT02YikHH&t=17

ballsofsteelandfury

Dicker The Kicker, you say?

comment image

King Hippo

This movie is so, so good. In retrospect, it amuses Hippo how young he and his siblings were when we watched this on VHS weekly every summer (a family classic, somehow).

Marvin the magical, sexual mule!

herodotus450

Thank god we figured out parental controls so kids these days are protected from filth!