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Saturday Night Off-season Open Thread 9

ballsofsteelandfury

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In these Off-season Open Threads, I’ll sum up the week that was, provide you with TMI-style information, and throw some random spaghetti at the wall and see if it sticks.

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Fucking hell! How the fuck are we starting May next week?? Seriously, time fucking flies when you get older. I have a new project at work with a due date of December and I can already see that the rest of the year is going to fly by. I’ll try to smell the roses a bit, but I probably won’t take a deep breath until 2025.

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My favourite hockey team, the LA Kings, are going to try to capture their third Stanley Cup this year and are behind in the series 2 games to 1 with the next game in LA on Sunday. Win that and it becomes a three game series. They’ve already won in Edmonton once, so anything could happen.

I am still hoping for a decent performance this year. Losing in the opening series would not count.

***

I still owe you a Balls Magazine post on my latest golf tourney. Spoiler Alert: I did not win, but I had fun. Also, I’m very surprised at how many Asian lady golfers are out there in SoCal. On a related story, Lady Balls has started looking for golf outfits. It’s all about the outfit…

***

I’m sticking with Round 5 of my Iron Curtain workout program. Incorporating the HIIT cardio on my off days has been a bit more hit and miss but my cardio is improving.

As I mentioned before, I’m wearing less and less clothes on the weekends. Let’s just say my neighbors are lucky we have high fences…

***

I greatly enjoyed your reactions to my list of Life Skills that I learned in High School that I don’t think are learned anymore by kids that age. I have thought about it and have come up with some more:

  • How to play quarters
  • How to change your car’s oil
  • How to play poker
  • How to work a barbecue grill
  • How to cook a meal from scratch
  • How to get a fake ID

***

Speaking of Gen X rants, I truly do not understand how overprotective Gen X parents have become. My brother and I were allowed to “go out and play” with our friends with the only condition that we were home by a certain time. Sure, there was hell to pay if we were late and did not call to say we would be late. I think that’s where I honed my time estimating skills. To this day, I can give ETAs accurate to within two minutes.

However, there was no “tracking” of my whereabouts or constant monitoring. How did we get to this?? What happened? I mean, I know I got away with a LOT of shit, but nothing bad happened. And I learned a LOT. WHY WON’T GEN X PARENTS GIVE THAT SAME GIFT TO THEIR KIDS???

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One more topic for discussion: Who do you think did the best in the Draft? Who did the worst? I’m particularly happy with the Steelers’ picks. Let us know what you think of your team’s draft in the comments.

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Your weekly Psych gif:

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Your weekly hot girl pic:

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Your weekly music video:

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I’m assuming there are sports on tonight, but honestly I don’t care.

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Gumbygirl

Goodnight my darling dears!
https://youtu.be/s-Mhvb-7mOw?si=uWAvyojppJmPz8jD

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Brick Meathook

This is great!

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Brick Meathook

I realize I probably posted this same clip yesterday, but it’s awesome. I won’t post it again.

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2Pack

Tomorrow afternoon I will attend the funeral for a friend.
He passed away Thursday after battling a progressive, incurable nervous system condition.
Worked with him and was friends for 30 years.
Makes you think.

https://youtu.be/REfKNbNndzo?si=2IIK4I6_TIQfQTkL

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ballsofsteelandfury

Sorry to hear that. That’s tough.

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2Pack

While not unexpected it’s still always sad. He was a hoot, would have fit right in the Clubhouse.

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Mr. Ayo

Damn, RIP

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BugEyedBoo

Kids don’t run wild in neighborhoods anymore because of a few reasons.

  1. Mom and dad are both working, kids aren’t latchkey kids until age 12 or so, and even then most parents don’t let their kid run lose until they get home.
  2. When the moms had to go back to work, kidnapped kids started to make the news. Parents were already feeling neglectful, and news of waves of windowless vans abducting a million kids a year just amplified that.
  3. Life was cheap back then. Us kids back then were breathing leaded gasoline fumes, riding in cars without seat belts and safety glass, and throwing lawn darts at each other’s feet.

Now for my important thoughts this evening:

I just watched Star Trek: Strange New Worlds S1E6 “Lift Us Where Suffering Cannot Reach”. A classic Trek title if you’ve ever seen one. It was a flat-out ripoff of LeGuin’s “The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas”, with a sidebar of “Don’t stick your dick in crazy.” It’s still a perfectly okay show, though.

I read a description of Starfield as, “Eating 5 gallons of vanilla pudding.” That might not be too far off. I picked up Cyberpunk 2077, but I’d finished it twice already and got bored. Then I picked up Fallout 4, which I had bough for cheap a couple of years ago and never got more than a couple of hours into it. I got a little farther into it, but I was getting bored again. So right now I’ve restarted Horizon: Zero Dawn. I had made it about 2/3 of the way through last time, so I’m going to give it another shot. Those robot animals will seriously kick your ass if you’re not careful.

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Redshirt

If anything, I thought it to be a refreshing change of past from the TOS formula.

Kirk nails an alien chick, completely derails a backwards society, and warps off telling his best friend and his work husband that the world’s better off but doesn’t return to see how he f—ed that world five parsecs to Sunday by suddenly changing the entire foundation of a civilization without preparing the people for the change, educating them or even getting their tacit consent.

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Mr. Ayo

But the real fun part is where you die in the first 5 minutes

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Redshirt

Family Guy – Ensign Ricky (youtube.com)

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Mr. Ayo

Wow, I chose a poor time to take a nap

https://twitter.com/PuckReportNHL/status/1784403929029132376

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Brick Meathook

The biggest insult to me is not returning a telephone call within 48 hours. You don’t have that many problems in your life to not return a call unless you’re in jail, and even then you can still make a phone call.

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WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hng5GGLgFAg

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Mr. Ayo

My voicemail message is Email me or you won’t hear back.

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Redshirt

Grinch Voicemail (youtube.com)

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Redshirt

Watching end of White House Correspondents Dinner. Can’t tell if Colin Jost is bombing or if the crowd doesn’t want to laugh at jokes about Democrats.

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ArmedandHammered

Went to the movie theater tonight and saw Alien, they are doing screenings for the 45th anniversary of the movie, plus there is the new one coming out.

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Don T

Looks promising
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Redshirt

The Sisko works in mysterious ways.

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Brick Meathook

Rick Nelson (1940-1985)

Probably second only to Elvis Presley

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSfdc5LKbzc

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Don T

The only thing I’ll say about being a Gen X parent is that I let my kid fall and get up by herself they way I was raised and often the happiest tome of my day is realizing The Heiress is in her 20s and my child raisin’ days are OVER FOREVER!
And once when she was 8, we exploded bottle rockets from the parking lot of a judicial-like facility somewhere. I was told, by her mother.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Nice!

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Doktor Zymm

If naps were people they would be totally awesome and I would vote for them for public office

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Brick Meathook

Here’s a photo of Bob Dylan and Muhammad Ali.

There is so much to unpack here . . .

https://ibb.co/vVcv6Ls

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Don T

Bob has the best smoky eye this side of Derek Carr

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WCS

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I think it’s fascinating that Nixon and Hunter Thompson were actually able to have an actual discussion about football. It had to be the only thing they had in common.

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Brick Meathook

Richard Nixon was not the worst man in the world and Hunter S. Thompson was not the best. Thompson really thought Pat Buchanan was a good guy.

Thompson ended his life by blowing his brains out in the kitchen of his home in Aspen Colorado. WTF? He could have walked out into the backyard fifteen feet away and done the deed. There’s probably brains still dripping from the ceiling in that kitchen to this day. I lost all respect for him.

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Brick Meathook

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Doktor Zymm

That’s a good price on lardgerine

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Gumbygirl

US government grade ” utility.” Sounds like the green meat they used to sell in the commissary in Scotland. It had stickers on it that said it was safe for human consumption, as certified by an army veterinarian. Always comforting to know. I went to the local grocery store, you won’t be surprised to know.

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Brick Meathook

https://ibb.co/HdtY0TB

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yeah right

I’ll bet Jim Nabors could sing the SHIT out of Camelot.

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Horatio Cornblower

Watching UFC. Guy coming in has the second shortest average fight time.

Me: “I could beat that.”

My son: “Bullish…Oh, because you’d get knocked out immediately.”

Me: “Exactly.”

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King Hippo

I had like a 4-hour nap and am already pining to go back to sleep.

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

https://ibb.co/yp7QdpG

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

This woman is so beautiful I want to kill myself. That’s pretty dang beautiful..

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

Hey WCS that’s Primati’s in the Strip District!

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Gumbygirl

Matzoh ball is a floater! Those are the best ones.

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Mr. Ayo

That looks great Brick.

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Brick Meathook

Joe Buck & Troy Aikman:

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Brick Meathook

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yeah right

My parents kicked my ass out the door by 9 every day during summer vacation.

I was allowed bathroom breaks and water sometimes.

They didn’t want to see my ass until dinner time.

Every day.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Man, you had some freaky parents!

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yeah right

I could tell you some shit, man.

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Brick Meathook

Montreal

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King Hippo

I swear to fuck I read that notebook cover as Rhodesia

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Brick Meathook

My other foot (the good one):

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Brick Meathook

The meaning of my life:

https://ibb.co/xDd0SN5

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blaxabbath

The way stupid people have become pacificed with being stupid — is more of a shock than a surprise, I guess.

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ballsofsteelandfury

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King Hippo

My mother the retired (2nd and 3rd grade) public school teacher sums it up nicely – There have always been stupid and ignorant people, they just didn’t used to be fucking PROUD of it.

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Horatio Cornblower

Regrettably I have to stay sober long enough to go pick up Mexican food, (they’re takin’ our food orders!), but on the plus side I did have them throw in a margarita to go.

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Brick Meathook

If you ever find yourself in Los Angeles (pronounced “Loss Ang-Guh-Leez”) be sure to go to Zankou Chicken on Sunset at Normandie in Hollywood. You’ll thank me later.

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herodotus450

I’ll Zankou now!

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blaxabbath

Do I order the spaghetti?

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ballsofsteelandfury

Newly renovated!

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yeah right

The garlic sauce (toum) is worth the trip by itself.

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blaxabbath

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King Hippo

Quick! Shoot it in the face!!! – Kristi N., Pierre, SD

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blaxabbath

Roger is untrainable in many lovable ways.

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King Hippo

please tell me you really did name your doggie after the Ginger Hammer!

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blaxabbath

He’s from Roswell.

So hes named after Roger the Alien on American Dad.

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SonOfSpam

Good boy! (You and Roger)

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King Hippo

ok, that’s even better. Y’all seem like cool Blax. Ones of the good ones, as it were!

2
Mr. Ayo

BOOP!

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Gumbygirl

Who’s a good doggie?!!

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Horatio Cornblower

So far today I’ve assembled and removed the recyclables, gone to the gym, walked the dog a very debatable 3.8 miles, (really question the accuracy of the step monitor on the iPhone), (we did find a bottle dump in the woods, which will be explored in the future without an excitable canine running around broken glass), cleaned a section of the outside of the house that was developing a mold issue thanks to the tropical amounts of rain we’ve had over the last several months, cleaned the door frame of dirt and such because I was already out there, mowed the lawn, raked the lawn, cleared the lawn of dog shit, and removed several piles of branches that Mrs. Horatio had pruned from the lilacs and then left like they were some kind of Blair Witch warning cairns.

Folks, it’s Miller time!

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ballsofsteelandfury

I think it’s special treats time.

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blaxabbath

So far!

Imagine what else you can accomplish with this momentum?

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Horatio Cornblower

Ooh, too bad it got dark and cold out! Nothing more to do.

/ignores pile of laundry that is close to gaining sentience.

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King Hippo

I was a “go out and play” Gen X parent. You can’t – and shouldn’t TRY – to shelter your kids from the world. How else are they to understand how it works, and LEARN to sense/recognize dangers?

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ballsofsteelandfury

Good man!

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Horatio Cornblower

We lived in too rural in area, on a busy road near a State park. “Go ride your bike over to Jimmy’s house” would have been a death sentence.

Last edited 1 year ago by Horatio Cornblower
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Mr. Ayo

The whole point of golfing is to meet those Asian lady golfers.

https://doorfliesopen.com/2017/07/11/tina-dfoeff-6/

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WCS

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ballsofsteelandfury

I miss that motherfucker…

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herodotus450

Is that from Bible Black? Not that I know what that is, of course.

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ballsofsteelandfury

No idea. Moose posted it in the comments of TWBS’ post that Ayo linked.

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Gumbygirl

Moooooooooooose, come home!!!

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King Hippo

I e-mailed him, not once but TWICE.

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Mr. Ayo

Indeed. We miss you Moose.

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Redshirt

“… while the Secret Service dragged the overweight Ohio native away after giving President Trump an atomic wedgie, the suspect was quoted as saying, ‘I did it for you, Moose. Please come home.’”

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Mr. Ayo

It’s from here. Don’t ask.

https://hentaidude.com/tsundere-inran-shoujo-sukumi-episode-1/

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herodotus450

If there is an octopus, it’s pixelated and you cant really see it.

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Mr. Ayo

There is, but only a very small portion of it is pixelated. You’ll need to go to around 13:10 to see the octopus and the aforementioned screenshot.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[reminisces happily about hooking up with the drink cart girl, who I presume golfed and was…does Polynesian count as Asian?]

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ballsofsteelandfury

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Mr. Ayo

Of course

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