Sexy Friday – 20240719

TGIF! After last week’s post my algorithm has been feeding me lots of bamboo information. Didn’t realize BIG BAMBOO had such an active marketing department. Anyway, sports are back! The Open, Tour De France, and baseball. Ok, well kind of back.

Survival – Personal Edition

Speaking of The Open, let’s say you and your mates just watched a round, and are heading home. So you and the lads decide to pop into the pub for a couple of pints. Then you decide to throw darts. Invariably, someone stumbles, someone has an errant throw, someone isn’t paying attention to their whereabouts, but at any rate one of the lads now has a dart injury. Let’s get it treated!

  • If the dart is embedded in the head, chest, neck or back, act fast. First, call WCS to get an ambulance on the way if you can’t get transport the lad yourselves. Second, rinse a clean towel in cold water, wring it out, then wrap it around the base of the dart to stabilize it and prevent further injury.
  • If the dart hit anywhere else, let’s treat it ourselves. First, if the dart is still embedded, pull it out in one quick motion. If not embedded, find out where it hit. Also, place that dart in a safe location for now and we’ll get to it later.
  • Sit the lad down and then examine the wound. Determine if blood is spurting from the wound (bad) or not (fine).
  • For the spurters, apply a clean cloth to the wound. Elevate the wound above the lad’s heart and apply pressure to the wound for at least five (5) minutes. If still spurting, repeat with a clean cloth for 15 minutes. If still spurting, repeat with another clean cloth for 30 minutes. If still spurting, see the first bullet point.
  • The wound should now be only seeping blood at worst. Rinse the wound under cold water, then cover with a sterile bandage or pad or dressing. Advise your lad to get a tetanus booster if they haven’t had one in a decade or can’t remember their last one.
  • Now let’s tend to that poor innocent dart. Rinse clean under hot water, then sterilize with rubbing alcohol.

Your lad is now on the road to recovery. Also, you’ll have to break the bad news his night of dart playing is over and really he should stay on the other side of the pub or head home for safety. Also, the dart is ready to re-enter play.

Click here to get to commenting

Survival – Species Edition

Time to put the sexy in Friday!

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!

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Mr. Ayo
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WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svbTUSrfA4w

As an alcoholic in recovery, honestly gambling addiction is the scariest type. I know I drank away an absurd amount of money; being that laisse-faire about actual cash money is TERRIFYING. At least when I was pickling myself, the high lasted for a day, not ten seconds at best.
I was also too wasted to get into debt with the types of people who take thumbs as interest. So, I had that going for me.

Last edited 3 months ago by WCS
BrettFavresColonoscopy

WOOOOOOOOOO

yeah right

Oh shit.

That’s never good.

yeah right

Unless the Cubs won.

Sorry

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Not about baseball. But a team I support made me happy, and now I can finally go to sleep.

WCS

Sean Hannity is thrilled that DNC party members are saying the Republican convention was like Obama’s nomination in 2008, and this is means Trump will win.

Tangentially speaking, Hannity is laying out how Obama did something good, AND how it helped Trump.

If you were to point this out to him, his eyes will roll into the back of his skull, and he’ll begin seizing.

Last edited 3 months ago by WCS
Brick Meathook

1978 World Series, Game 4, Dodgers vs Yankees at old Yankee Stadium
Bleacher seats, price with tax: $5.00
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Led Zeppelin, May 26 1977, Capital Centre Landover MD
This ticket image from the internet but I know my actual ticket is still around somewhere
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yeah right

Well well well.

Reason number 11 billion why I love my family.
At work. Three this afternoon give or take I get a text.

“Dad, met for dinner at 7:15?”

This is from youngest right.

Who lives in Seattle.

“Yes”

“We’re having dinner at Kings Hawaiian in Torrance”

This is LITERALLY on my way home from work and I punched out at 6:40

King’s Hawaiian is like if Dennys only had Hawaiian food on their menu.

It was insane and wonderful and I hugged both of my daughters version 1.0 and two of the three version 2.0.

The other one is in Madrid.

Given the choice?

Choose Madrid over King’s Hawaiian.

litre_cola

Kevin Bridges is the best Scot comedy going

BugEyedBoo

.

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Doktor Zymm

https://youtu.be/Kd1xVG6f2No
I was sitting in the section closest to this, my first Raiders game after moving to the Bay Area

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duwFnrE7cbY
This was worst I’ve experienced in person.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_x9EUHA-kg
This was the coldest.

Brick Meathook

My cousin on Long Island posted this:

https://ibb.co/M5HLWQN

Doktor Zymm

Very 8-bit

litre_cola

Greatest Privince in Central Canadia is v the hillbillies right now. She tents.

WCS

bouourble achiueveumeunt uunloucked…?

litre_cola

GREATEST EVER COMMERCIALS

https://youtu.be/UtLHangItFQ?si=dqZiP76Gvew8NuyS

/SHAKES WINE FIST AT CLOUD

litre_cola

Cafu, underrated.

Edgar David’s, weapon

Figo, would fuck your mom

Brick Meathook

This commercial was directed by Terry Gilliam (from Monty Python)

litre_cola

Horseshit

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5ibSvOWAMg

Now airing in the PSAP, along with reruns of the Dirt Stillers, Jimmy Fallon, and one of the 482 Law & Orders.

2Pack

Nice Ayo. Lady number 10 wants me to drink deeply. Which I will while toying with her foundation garments. Speaking of which… I see London, I see France…

091021505-ada239a0-c060-4d4f-b3b8-0d909d7171b9.jpg
WCS

16 hours. Guess yinz are really stuck with me.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[gulps down birth control pill]

Game Time Decision

Like that’s enough

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[gulps down two more]

WCS

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litre_cola

I will say it’s better than watching MILF manor while high and wine drunk but prob not.

WCS

This is far less nauseating. And irritating.

Last edited 3 months ago by WCS
Senor Weaselo

The Hudson Valley Renegades just had a walk-off homer to complete a combined no-hitter.

Fuck, I wish I’d played at that game instead.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Being present for Clayton Kershaw’s no-hitter is probably going to be the highlight of my live sports attendance lifetime.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxspKrnpMFE

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnCe6mc4jt8

We rushed the field, got pepper sprayed, and I witnessed many a dumpster and pieces of furniture experience burnination up close.

Last edited 3 months ago by WCS
Brick Meathook

I was here, and sitting down in the corner at tiny RFK where the last play of the game happened, right in front of me. 1987 NFC Championship game, MIN@WAS. [*Redacted] s went on to beat Buffalo in the Superb Owl. This was the early game, and I went with my brother in law, who later he took me to a country club and the late game was DEN/CLE where Earnest Byner famously fumbled on the goal line (“The Fumble”). Wild day.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7N5gzv0-ug

Col. Duke LaCross

Never saw anything super famous, but I did see Mariano Rivera’s second ever plate appearance back in 2010 in Phoenix. A groundout to the 2nd baseman. At least he put it in play!

Brick Meathook

For those of you in the vicinity of Southern California tomorrow we are having an informal DFO SoCal Summit Meeting (7/20/24 – Moon Landing Day!) starting at 11:00AM-Noon at a location described in the #dfosocal channel on DFO Slack (hint: it’s in glamorous Long Beach).

Long Beach is a city in the greater Los Angeles metropolitan area, located about 90 minutes south of Bakersfield, 90 minutes west of San Bernardino, 2 or so hours north of Mexico, and about 2 seconds east of the Pacific Ocean (tide dependent). Look on a map you can’t miss it.

I’m not going to post the summit location here in public so we won’t be flooded with gibberish-speaking Russian trolls at the super-deluxe conference center & spa where we’ll be summiting. Go to Slack. If you can read the #dfosocal Slack channel you are invited. If you can’t read it and it’s blurry and prompts you to get a free Pro trial ask to be added to the list. I don’t know who you ask, but it ain’t me.

Bring a bathing suit and a fully fueled butane lighter, and if you take prescription medications bring along an extra supply. If you take opioids bring all of them. You’ll probably want to have $100-200 cash in mixed bills, and make sure you have an up-to-date emergency notification card on your person (clear plastic sleeves and lanyards will be provided). Hand-held firearms are not required but not discouraged. Time travel and massive alcohol/drug use and sandwich eating may be involved here but there are no guarantees or warranties implied or otherwise.

ballsofsteelandfury

Don’t forget to bleach your assholes! The Terranea has standards…

WCS

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Artemis understands.

2Pack

Whats that Navy thing you guy’s say… Fair winds and following seas.
In the Army we simply state, let the dick dance begin!

Brick Meathook

They only say that for dead guys

ballsofsteelandfury

I’ve heard Navy guys say that for guys that were retiring.

Brick Meathook

That’s the same as dead

Brick Meathook

They don’t say it to guys getting their discharge papers at EAOS (End of Active Obligated Service). They don’t even say goodbye.

WCS

Our interwebz resource computers are back, but the CAD crashed earlier. It’s working.

For now.

Hi, and welcome to another overnight.

Doktor Zymm

You certainly picked an eventful time to start working there

litre_cola

Winners of the Memorial League have been
Weaselo
SPAM
AYO
Sharky.

We are introducing a Lowratio ligue deux. There will be promotion and relegation. It is free. Rules are stupid and during the draft please listen to the shittiest TWBS music you can think of.

https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.com/f1/209105/invitation?key=3a07144c86507a29&soc_trk=lnk&ikey=79d23a09c66a6ad9

scotchnaut

If memory serves, I’d have been relegated twice already.

WCS

Just like drifters tend to relegate from living whenever you’re “on a trip.”

litre_cola

4 years. Never made the playoffs

Col. Duke LaCross

May I join, sir?

litre_cola

Click the link

Senor Weaselo

The important question: Is it the two finalists who get promoted, or, is it the champ and the #1 seed in the regular season (and if so what happens if the 1 seed wins).

litre_cola

Finalists

Senor Weaselo

MANDATORY listening time! (No, I am not on this track or album, Senorita Weaselo is and is currently at the studio working on the last couple of tracks.)
https://youtu.be/vcQ7EgKoPeI?si=aAYhCpSOHBnyySp0

scotchnaut

“Lost”? I don’t even have to listen to it to know that the ending will be very disappointing.

fleshwound_NPG

have they fully khrushchev’d biden yet

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Not yet but I think it’s close. The instant it happens I’ll sign up to volunteer for the campaign, no matter who the nominee is (presumably Harris).

Last edited 3 months ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Senor Weaselo

It’s a good question: Who would you not vote for over Agent Orange? Like, would you vote for Vance? Gym? Gaetz? Where in the Know-Nothings is the line?

scotchnaut

“Beware big money donors flexing their muscles and White House folks with good photoshop skills, is what I always said.”

-Nikolai Yezhov

fleshwound_NPG

letterman does not have the best track record at hosting events that are not his own

bafkreic5ny6rne6vpapw4bqavapohjxxzv4zgdgzlmry5okysnee5uvrwq.jpg
blaxabbath

This year’s RAIDERS season tickets come in a treasure chest.

1000011321.jpg
WCS

Filled with very used cat litter and medical waste!

fleshwound_NPG

so is all low income housing here in indiana

WCS

People rip on West Virginia, but at least it’s pretty to look at it.

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Doktor Zymm

Kentucky too!

Sharkbait

Kentucky at least had good whiskey

Doktor Zymm

Speaking of which, think I’m having a wee dram of the Four Roses OBSK tonight

BugEyedBoo

New River Gorge > Cooper’s Rock.

Grandview-Main-Overlook-New-River-Gorge-National-Park-1024x592.jpg
Brick Meathook

I kayak-camped down that river twice.

WCS

Disney World > Kennywood

Of course one if much bigger and better, but the other is much closer and cheaper.

ballsofsteelandfury

I prefer the chest in pic 6

Doktor Zymm

Is it full of yuk?

WCS

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Doktor Zymm

If I ever somehow end up owning the Browns I’m changing the mascot to Mr. Yuk

Gumbygirl

Gumby used him for his fantasy football team a few years ago.

WCS

The Jets are also acceptable.

Gumbygirl

Mr. Yuk is mean, Mr. Yuk is green. When you see him, you’ll know quick, things marked Yuk, make you sick. Sick! Sick! Sick!

fleshwound_NPG

colts tickets come in a pork tenderloin sandwich

WCS

I figured it be the other way in Gravy Country.

Doktor Zymm

Another top tip, it is NEVER advisable to use curare tipped darts in pub play. Even if you’re an assassin playing darts with Castro

WCS

I don’t know what most of that means, but I trust doktorbs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Is it actually possible to coat bullets in poison, in case they just nick the target? Asking for a friend.

Doktor Zymm

Probably difficult to do effectively. If the bullet just nicks a target, then there isn’t going to be enough time for the poison to absorb, especially in areas with a lot of cartilage and lower blood flow like the ear. Any poison potent enough to administer a lethal dose with a quick nick would be more likely to kill whoever has to carry and load that ammo

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, makes sense. Given the target it probably would have made more sense to dip them in holy water anyways.

scotchnaut

I like where your head is at-hit me up if you want to do a collab.

fleshwound_NPG

sports sexy friday entry:

caitlin clark is only and handful of assists away from the wnba rookie season record. she may break the record shortly after the all-star/olympic break, but she will not do it with the swagger and the sauce of the one that set it

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/GpTHHoyREzU

fleshwound_NPG

oh hi

ticha.jpg
blaxabbath

A few more generations of complete transformation of every roster in the league and the WNBA just may have something to offer.

fleshwound_NPG

world’s computers: everything is a bit fucked right now

me: solitaire isnt

bafkreiaztyc2twqhzpwxf3c7wojamr3cqj4nsuqomu2agdjjwir7w5ml4q.jpg
Doktor Zymm

Good old 3.1!

Game Time Decision

I miss pinball for windows

litre_cola

I got your sexy right here.

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Doktor Zymm

I particularly like his majestic gaze into the distance

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Very heroic.

Gumbygirl

He is thinking Deep Thoughts.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

As opposed to Matt Gaetz, who is thinking Creep Thoughts.