We’re back! This here is your one-stop shop for scatter-brained observations-in the post and in the comments! That’s how we give back to the internet community.
It’s here-The Teams Heading In Opposite Directions Bowl. One team has a has-been at qb, the other a never-was. I guess the challenge for these teams is to provide entertaining football for one quarter and a bit and even that seems a bit much.
Minutiae:
-Here’s something from college ball that I came across-The Miami Hurricanes have had only 3 three-and-outs the entire season. That’s remarkable.
-Both the Pats and Jets have secured themselves high draft picks due to yesterday’s result, isn’t that wonderful?
-Tyrique Stevenson said the obvious: “I screwed up.” He wasn’t clear if it was regarding him not covering his assignment Noah Brown, getting called for PI earlier in the game, giving up a long pass to McLaurin or that other thing.
-Both the Pats and Steelers season-high scoring totals occurred vs the Saleh-less Jets.
-Hold on to your man boobs-the Falcons are the #3 seed in the NFC.
-Here they go again-the Chiefs won the Matt Uche Sweepstakes. With Patty playing the way he is, this will buy him a bit more time.
To The Game!
Giants/Steelers:
-Does Wilson’s quality play last week negate the previous two year’s work in Denver?
-Or does he just respond better to guttural chants accompanied by the clinking of shrunken skulls (Tomlin) rather than constant berating? (Payton)
-Credit to Daboll, despite the record he’s staved off the “FIRE HIM!” talk yet again.
-By playing in this game Cam Heyward will pass Donnie Shell as the Steelers leader in defensive players total games played.
-Pickens should have a day-he’ll be covered by Deonte Banks who is not remotely a #1 cb and who was also called out by his coach for repeated instances of not hustling.
-Look for Dimes to air out the ball when he’s not flat on his back (he was sacked 8 times last week) because while Pitt is 2nd in rush D they’re all the way down at 22 in the pass game. Also, Nabers complained he was open quite a bit (“Go look at the target tape!”) and Daboll agreed.
Do your thing.
Nice catch by “Windowless Rape” Van Jefferson.
Thinking about changing the auto-message that plays when a call begins. Thoughts?
A Terrible Towel?
God I love that line
Boris is beating me by half a point
What’s that in rubles?
Dammit Brocky, I was counting on you! Back to 4th place for me.
I was counting on you! Back to 4th place for me
I refuse to believe that even someone as kindhearted as you believed this
Why yes, I am using the adjustable desk at work. Yes, fozz, I am standing. I’ll let you know if anyone fires up Emily in Paris during the game.
You didn’t hear? It’s Emily in Rome now.
I’d watch Emily in Lesbos.
Emily in Phnom Penh.
That would be “Emil Becomes Emily in Phnom Penh.”
What happens in The Killing Fields stays in The Killing Fields.
I am still amused by the fact that my parents walked out of the theatre when they felt that The Killing Fields was too violent. I have no idea what they were expecting from a film of that name about that event — a musical comedy?
Emily in space.
I was always partial to this one, especially at 1:30 AM back when Skinemax lived up to its name.
“What’s your emergency? Oh, also, I’m standing, and now you know that.”
what is a false start?
In other news, I picked up a quest 3s and VR is super fun for gaming
What are you playing? I never got into anything I tried on Oculus
Right now Taskmaster and Contractors VR. I haven’t been able to get Microsoft flight sim working yet, but 2024 comes out in less than a month so I’m not too invested in trying to make it work.
NHL sense arena and Beatsaber are next on the download list
How’s the VR porn?
Have not sampled. However when searching VR games on steam, there is So. Much. VR. Porn.
I had a bad experience with it, but I forgot I was at Chuck E. Cheese.
I’ve recently discovered that Pringles has released Elote, Carnitas Taco, and Street Taco flavors.
1) Why did these get made?
2) Why do they taste so fucking delicious?
1) Because those sound great as high snacks
2) Are you currently high?
Of course I am.
They are delicious sober as well. Especially the Elote. I’m kinda mad about it. I expected them to be awful and instead I’m over here not stopping.
I fucking love Pringles. I don’t care that people say they aren’t “real” potato chips, those people are stupid and deserve to be kicked in the cooch.
The Dr. Mrs. just described sports radio as “a bunch of white guys complaining about people” and I do not think should could possibly be more right about it.
can add old to that
Seems like that describes most call in radio and like 80% of podcasts
Apropos of nothing
https://youtu.be/2WZLJpMOxS4
Stillers offense with penalties this year?
Still my favorite episode of all time
Pretty much sums up the Yankees World Series effort.
Oh dear, Eli, sit down sweetie
Still at work, is Peyton screaming yet at the poor QB play, or do I have time to watch his eventual breakdown?
Seen better QB plays that involved hiring a jiujitsu instructor for your wife
To be fair, he probably just assumed the guy would give her MRSA
Hey! My wife needs a private, deep tissue, pelvic massage that she and her instructor say is purely therapeutic. It must be working because it always involves moaning and groaning at first but it ends with her loudly invoking God’s Name. I asked the instructor to teach me how to do it, but both he and wife both agreed I don’t have the ability, drive or equipment to do it.
No disrespect to Russell Wilson, but Pittsburgh Steelers’ morale and potential for success hasn’t been this bad since Henry Frick was put in charge of Carnegie Steel.
Considering what the Steelers offense has looked in the recent pass, this is not bad.
+1 Pinkerton
Bases loaded and Aaron Boone goes to Mark Leiter, Jr.
I mean, Schmidt really didn’t leave him any choice but holy shit this will not end well.
Actually, nice job getting out of that.
Can’t argue with that.
And then they sent Stanton from 2nd on a single to shallow left.
Back to 87%-the gods are toying with me.
NAWT A CATCH
/sharpens blade in scotchnaut
Math Hard! is giving me 91% chance to win because Pickens is skint so far.
85% after that catch.
18% after the TD
Nawt a TD!
There’s your guy.
Or not.
would rather have LT guest appearance on Sunday Night Football and spear Collinsworth in the throat once more for old time sake.
What was higher, their shorts or you?
Eack kick MOAR placement-y than the last!
They call it football for a reason, smgdh.
Yankees just refusing to show up for Game 3, down 2-0 in a four game series, is a bold choice. I doubt the Dodgers expected it.
Let’s see how it works out.
Not too well so far.
Refs are killing this game. If it keeps up I’m taking my scotch and going home.
It’s been that kind of season, although it started last season. I think it’s all a scheme to prevent the Lions from having a bunch of thiccdowns, and they’re doing it league-wide to disguise their true intentions
Super excited to see if someone makes a coke joke while LT is on the Manningcast
Belichick incoming bump route
That first quarter went by really fast.
I think there’s a bowl of gummies in the referees’ changing room before every game. Maybe mushrooms.
Lasik is doing free surgery for professional refs as part of their “Better Vision, Better Calls” campaign
http://amp.awfulannouncing.com/nfl/lasik-missed-call-rams-vikings-ad-opportunity.html
You can hold the wr’s hand in Pittsburgh.
They are merely exchanging long protein strings. If you can think of a simpler way I’d like to hear it
Can’t watch foosball, must read every review of Dragon Age.
Preview codes were only given to certain reviewers who met certain criteria, from what I have heard.
Yea, that’s just not true.
Mini review: started it six times, never fished. Morrigan disappoints when you have to get her real gear.
THIS SADNESS OVER MY FATHER’S DEATH, I CALL IT SWIMMING IN THE AMAZON WITH PIRANHAS BECAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN IT’S GONNA BITE YOU IN THE ASS
I envy you having a (positive) relationship with your father.
Troy Aikman finding Pittsburgh a fun place to visit. CTE is a horrible thing.
Glad to see we’re back to “One killer play ruins everything” offense.
Uhhhhhhh…. UNLEASH THE CLUB?
Doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Hopefully they go with Yetis.
Latter Day SKATES ftw
Yeah, let’s hear more about how the Rooneys and Maras are such good friends. I love seeing billionaires happy and fulfilled.
/orders Guillotine 2-pack from Costco
Smart move not relying on Amazon for that one
Costco is much better towards their employees.
Would Manningcast be way better if only one of them was drunk or if both of them were?
Belichick – better drunk, high, or stoned?
I think they should trade off and also Belichick should be drunk
Art Rooney the Second having a chat with John Mara the Stupid.
BLEERGH MUST EAT
That was a pretty throw and catch, just like a real QB would throw!
I’m counting on Watt to continue to show a professional and subdued reaction after a sack tonight.
Regarding stand up desks: 80% of the people I worked with who used them were insufferable douche bags. Your results may vary. But I wanted to pour boiling baby oil on their feet.
I use them every day. Your criticism is warranted 🙂
This comes from when my old company moved to a new space, and we got a limited number of stand up desks.
I was in charge of putting them together – that master’s degree in marketing was really working out – and grown ass adults were acting like children, giving me shit over a decision that wasn’t mine.
Someone heard me mutter, “Grow the fuck up.”
I visited HR and was told, “You shouldn’t have said that, but you’re right. Don’t worry, you’re not getting written up.”
I have one that I use occasionally. It’s a nice break and I’ve noticed it helps my lower back.
Freddie on Fire.
RIP Yanks
If you gave Aikman a box of buttons on a Monday, would you hear from him by say, Saturday?
2nd and 24? THAT’S NFL BLITZ!
I got crushed in fantasy. I could wun if the Steelers defense gets like 45 points, but that isn’t gonna happen. I will just enjoy the game without any stress. Oh for fuuuuuuucks sake, Broderick Jones!
I gave up on my teams early yesterday, so I’m in the same boat! (unless Najee gets like 70 points lol)
Eli getting Peyton to say “ball holder” as many times as possible is the best use of ESPN.
“Eli if you make me say that again, mom says I can’t go trick or treatin’!”
Sling. That. CHARM!!!
When I was a kid we would do this thing where one guy would jump on the left side of a dude, and another guy would jump on the right side.
First guy would yell “Left ball!”
Second guy would yell “Right ball!”
Then both guys would yell “DICK IN THE MIDDLE!”
Anyone else ever do this?
was hey left nut and hey right nut here
Okay, so you guys had a different spin. I remember some dudes getting irate over this joke being played on them. He would be pummeled into the ground to teach him a lesson.
Fantasy football is stupid and dumb
Except when I need Pickens to score less than 16 points and his TD is called back.
Will be interested in seeing if Fields gets any snaps
He’s emergency #3 tonight (hamstring owie)
As opposed to Emergency #1, which is why Olivia had to pull over during the last Manning family road trip.
He’s in IR. Tweaked something in practice.
Lame, can’t they both be healthy at the same time? Or is there some weird genetic hybridization thing going on and we can’t see them in the same game since only one of them can access their shared genome?
Found a funny:
More like Ozempic Joe, amirite?
Aka Joezempic.
“The children want a Fat Joe, not a Slim Joe. Eat, Papa, eat.”
That reminds me. I still need to lose a lot more weight. I wish I could afford that.
If you’re paying out of pocket a compounding pharmacy is a lot cheaper
I need to find a reliable one, I guess.
I think there’s a subreddit for that, they vary in price and also there’s differences in what’s approved from state to state. I use Henry Meds and I’ve been happy with them, I think they’re in the middle on price
What really pisses me off is that my insurer will pay for me to have my guts ripped out but won’t pay for a fucking shot or pill.
That’s going to have to change eventually, hopefully sooner rather than later
Popped on an old Simpsons episode and it started off hot.
“For a school with no Asian kids, I think we put on a pretty good science fair.”
I need to go back and rewatch a bunch of old eps, so much is still relevant
lol Jimmy Pesto gets a year in prison
https://variety.com/2024/tv/news/bobs-burgers-actor-sentenced-one-year-in-prison-jan-6-capitol-attack-1236192825/
Lol at his lawyer saying he’s getting targeted because he’s a famous Hollywood actor.
So weird how MAGA guys can be Alpha Males and Whiny Pussies all at the same time.
“Fuck your feelings” cuts both ways, snowflake.
Not just MAGA Republicans. All Republicans.
Trev’s gonna be lonely.
Yup, they always go after the Italians . . .
For good reason
Jealousy is an ugly thing, but as a people we have learned to deal with it.
Oh, look at this well-adjusted motherfucker over here.
Legal Aid when asked about options for appealing the verdict:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnMdI_NiZvA&pp=ygUac3RvcCBicmVha2luZyB0aGUgbGF3IG1lbWU%3D
I have been desperate for them to replace Pesto’s Pizza with a restaurant run by Hawk.
.