“I’ll Have The Usual”-Your Regular NFL Football Open Thread

Much like Hippo yesterday, I’m finding it hard to put any energy into these previews so all of them will be skinny today. A reminder that the likes of the Packers, Browns, Raiders and Seahawks are on bye this week.

To The Games!

Pats/Bears:

It’s early days but it looks as though these two teams have found their guy. For both it looks like there’s something there.

Bills/Colts:

My opponent in Math Hard! is forced to start Richardson despite him not starting. The problem? He had Chase on Thursday with his 59 points. Gah…

Broncos/Chiefs:

Looks like K.C. stays undefeated unless Bo Nix has something up his sleeve.

Falcons/Saints:

I can’t see a new coach having an impact in this short of time and Atlanta is beginning to understand how good they are. We saw flashes of what Darnell Mooney could do in Chicago despite the very inconsistent qb play. As he integrates himself into this offense we see a guy that has the physical makeup of a smallish slot guy but the skillset of a fella that can run any route including the “Go” ones. There are only three other wr’s that have more ‘big play’ catches than Darnell.

Niners/Bucs:

So weird cheering for Mayfield-wasn’t he an asshole at his other stops? I get the feeling that San Fran is just biding its time and getting healthy which they seem to do every year. Why so many injuries on a regular basis though? McCaffrey is ready to go-if he gets more than 15 touches I’ll be surprised.

Steelers/Commies:

Washington is in that sweet spot that Houston was in last year-things have gone their way, they’ve got some wins under their belt and are starting to gain some confidence. Today comes a real test-it’s not like they’ll get one in their own division.

Vikes/Jags:

Girlfriend is out so this should be a walk for Minny.

There you go.

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blaxabbath

Did Russell Wilson turn three-shades darker this day?

BeefReeferLives

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WCS
fleshwound_NPG

lol commies

Gumbygirl

Welcome, Mr. Williams!

LemonJello

Jaguarsenschiesse achievement unlocked.

The Maestro

Of course the Chiefs snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. That kick was blocked harder than an ex on social media.

Mr. Ayo

HeHeHe. Snatch.

fleshwound_NPG

my high school ex and i follow each other on insta. the ultra-rare “friendly ex” that i run into on rare occasions

she got 4 kids, which means not only is she the rare friendly ex but “oh thank fucking god i dont have 4 kids, it all worked out in the end”

LemonJello

I had no idea today was the festival of SHAN’KHLOR, DOINK, and PBLATT

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, it’s ShieldAssist’s bye week.

Redshirt

There is no God.

fleshwound_NPG

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Col. Duke LaCross

Our entire offense is Cairo Fucking Santos.

blaxabbath

So that was a real bear?

Was it just knocked out? Or dead?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Tranquilized, if memory serves me.

Mr. Ayo

Tampa Bay paid for the ShieldAssist™++ package!

Mr. Ayo

DONKS WOO?

Mr. Ayo

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.

*pill bottle flies open*

JustStopDude

Anyone else ever heard of “The Ticket”? It’s a Dallas-Fort Worth sports radio station. One of their shows is called the Musers or something. They do a bit where after every Cowboys game, Fake Jerry Jones calls in.

It’s funny.

JustStopDude
Mr. Ayo

5 hours funny though? Not so much.

Last edited 10 days ago by Mr. Ayo
JustStopDude

I linked the first video I found.

Gatoraids

San Fran suffering the Moody Blues

Mr. Ayo

SAINT DOINK!

Mr. Ayo

Who has two thumbs and Moody as their Vodka League kicker?

That’s right, this dumbass.

LemonJello

What the unholy fuck is with the Jaguras “Salute to Paedo State” uniforms?

JustStopDude

They need to move the Jags to Mexico City already…

JustStopDude

Flipping through the channels, i spotted Michael Jorden at the NASCAR race.

I keep forgetting he owns and manages a team now.

Mr. Ayo

And he’s suing NASCAR. Too funny.

fleshwound_NPG

first semi-good sports-related thing he has done since 1998

Gatoraids

Whelp that time of the season for Mr Jones Wild Cart Ride

Gatoraids

Hanson doesnt want to jinx the close games by mentioning Pats vs Bears by name, he’s still recovering from that morning game like the rest of us.

Gatoraids

Flacco having the game of his retirement against the Bills

fleshwound_NPG

immediate josh allen sympathetic int!

Mr. Ayo

Another very ret special interception.

Last edited 10 days ago by Mr. Ayo
jjfozz

I lost my phone at the Ravens game.
My oldest son acted like I lost a kidney.
‘YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS IN THAT PHONE.’
Luckily, I was beered up so I simply told him to relax and snort some heroin

Senor Weaselo

Tbh, he’s not entirely wrong. If that shit gets stolen and fit through it could be a rough day.

JustStopDude

That’s why I use a Nokia flip phone. It’s like worrying my 2006 GMC manual pickup truck getting stolen.

They won’t be able to figure it out.

ballsofsteelandfury

Erin Andrews showing shoulder for teh Hippo!

JustStopDude

This is a first for me. My hotel TV has a guide channel cycling through. The annoying kind where you can’t just move around in it.

But the weird part is, it’s like a guide channel for the wrong channels. None of the are correct.

I feel like I’m staying at that Shinning hotel. Everything is eerily wrong and these twins in the hallway won’t leave me alone.

Game Time Decision

Red rum
Red rum
And maybe stay away from the elevator

ballsofsteelandfury

Who is the hot blonde that just interviewed Andy Reid? She is quite something

Mr. Ayo
ballsofsteelandfury

And she’s an interior designer!

Mr. Ayo

Just beware, she dated ARod for a bit.

ballsofsteelandfury

So she’s got bad taste. Perfect!

ballsofsteelandfury

Baseball ARod or Football ARod? It doesn’t really matter, I just want to know HOW BAD her taste is.

Mr. Ayo

Baseball. Also, she’s a Paedo state alum. So she’s got that going for her.

ballsofsteelandfury

Which is nice

Mr. Ayo

Well, me for one. Humble brag on your part though.

jjfozz

It turns out that if you’re installing insulation, you don’t need gloves, masks, or safety glasses. All you need is a lot of cold beer and you’re fine.

JustStopDude

It’s no different than filing your taxes. Just need a serious buzz.

JustStopDude

Making Terry Bradshaw doing the highlights is blatant elder abuse by Fox.

Gumbygirl

They have Tom Brady on the big tv with the volume up. He’s such a dweeb. I’m trying to ignore him, but it’s louuuuuuuud.

JustStopDude

Well…that is going to suck…

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ballsofsteelandfury

At least the air quality is good!

JustStopDude

I’m going to a mine.

I’m pretty sure all the heavy metals will be in the air.

ballsofsteelandfury

My dad worked at a copper mine. I’ve never seen so many different colors of “water”

ballsofsteelandfury

It was cool as fuck though. You’re basically at one of the last wild places left in the world

blaxabbath

Discuss further please.

Game Time Decision

Maybe bring a jacket
/Canadian commenters

Gatoraids

Hopefully MVS remembers this game one day after the inevitable Carr induced head trauma

JustStopDude

Every man I interact with in Alaska either looks like an angry butch lesbian or a unabomber cos player.

I’m not sure what this means.

Fronkenshteen

Commies and Stilllers throwing the game right across the field at each other. “No, YOU take it!”

Senor Weaselo

So there’s a phenomenal Japanese coffee and tea shop in Industry City Brooklyn called Tadaima. Between their hojicha, matcha (both regular and maple), and now their hot chocolate, I don’t think I’ve had a drink there that’s been any less than sublime.

Also it’s Senorita Weaselo and my 6-year anniversary, so one of our favorite drink places had to be on the intinerary after the show I played last night out on the Island which meant we had to for once spend the night at Apartment Weaselo.

Fronkenshteen

Getting the free preview week of Red Zone. Seems they’re going with far less of Scott’s play-by play and more of the network meatheads’ rambling these days. What a revolting decision. Par for the course, I suppose.

Mr. Ayo

Don’t forget I’m his side kick!

— Kevin Hart

jjfozz

Insert [KIND OF HOT ACTRESS WHO MAY HAVE MADE BAD LIFE DECISIONS IN HER CAREER] as female lead.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m no expert in Lesser Footy, but it seems to me that one of Arsenal’s current problems is the apparent misunderstanding about being offsides, and that in fact it’s not allowed.

Spur

Am a Tejano. My maternal and paternal families have lived in South Texas before it was Texas. We have family who served in the Civil War, my direct grandfather x3 was a Pony Express rider. I know Hispanic friends and coworkers who are 1st or 2nd generation who voted for Trump. Their parents or grandparents are not here legally. Am calling ICE on these people. Im going to give them what they deserve.

Am not joking, my sister’s son-in-law is 1st gen. They live in Idaho, he thinks he’s white. We met his family a few years back and they are from Mexico. I rejoined Facebook to collect info on them and on Jan 1 2025, am reporting to ICE.

I’ve seen other Hispanics vowing to do the same.

Same for Women in Texas. Any gossip I hear about anyone’s daughter/wife leaving Texas for a “procedure” am reporting for that 10k reward.

BeefReeferLives

“Thank you for your service!” /burp

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Gumbygirl

You. I love you!

Senor Weaselo

So, would an all-MetLife team break .500?

JustStopDude

The Giants need to realize that white quarter backs don’t work.

It’s like a black dude at center. It just ain’t right.

Gatoraids

Flacco scores with the early lead…for the Bills

Spur

My picks today

Bills -3.5
Cards of Duty +1.5
Commies – 2.5
Chargers -7.5

Mr. Ayo

Less yapping, more Okto Box Scotty!

Horatio Cornblower

That’s either going to be sensational or a generational war crime. I don’t see a lot of in-between there.

Gumbygirl

My sister and I are at a sports bar in Palm Springs to watch the Steelers. I was up to watch the Munich game, but it wasn’t much of an attention grabber.

Doktor Zymm

I’m a fan of the various types of fried cheese or fried pickles

Gumbygirl

Todays special is shrimp tacos. And I may get a beer, haven’t had one in months. Party animal!

BeefReeferLives

If anyone deserves a cold beer, its you, GumbyGirl!

Go Stillers!!

Gatoraids

Down here in SoFla Flannigans has Joe’ Rockin Rib Rolls, which is BBQ rib chunks, cheddar cheese, onion wrapped in wontons and deep fried. Plus a generous serving of ranch and greek yogurt dipping sauce. was part of our trade for tyreek from KC

Mr. Ayo

My go-to sports bar appetizer if it’s on the menu? Freezer vodka.

Mr. Ayo

Thank goodness I’m not wearing them!

JustStopDude

Sunday, I left Tokyo. Monday through Thursday, doing a job in Virginia. Now Alaska.

I’m so jet lagged, I could puke.

Gumbygirl

And you’re a Browns fan. You poor baby!

Doktor Zymm

I’ve never tried puking as a cure for jetlag, but it’s probably worth a try

Mr. Ayo

Just drink through it. You’ll be fine.

JustStopDude

I’m an alcoholic. Sadly, that is not an option.

Spur

What man made virus are you spreading?

Gatoraids

Germany knew to get that overtime done soon and not get stuck in the Red Zone.