Your Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Damn, the wind is whipping off the lake so intensely this evening I expect the Edmund Fitzgerald to float by. Over the course of a 36 hour period all hope of a third consecutive snowless Christmas fell by the wayside. Oh well…

Minutiae:

-It all comes down to this-Mr. Ayo-I like to call him Aoli Joe-are both in it to win it or something. The last playoff spot in Freezer Vodka is in the balance. The bastard gets home field advantage because of the name of the league. Well oiled, Aoli.

-Is He Just That Unlikeable?: Eric Bieniemy was fired as OC of the UCLA Bruins after just one go-around. Sure the offense was lousy but hell, it’s college-tons of guys get more than one season to implement their concepts.

-Lesson Learned, Just Like The Others: The Steelers and Panthers realized that Diontae Johnson is a piece of work. The Ravens just figured it out last week as he refused to enter a game when called upon. If I’m a GM I’d never touch a guy that was thrown out of Tomlin’s clubhouse.

To The Game!

Packers/Lions:

-The thought occurred to me while watching the Thanksgiving game that Detroit’s stadium has become a very tough place to play and I’m not talking about the quality of the team.

-Gibbs is ridiculously efficient-he’s got 973 yards so far on 163 carries which means he’s running at a 6 yards per rush clip. Imagine if he had the backfield to himself like Saquon does. The caveat is that Montgomery eats up the tough yards but I’d counter that Gibbs’ ability to rip off a 40 yarder is always there.

-The secondary winner of this tilt? The Vikes at 11-2 distance themselves from the Pack or pull even with the Lions. They’re not that weird team from 2022 that beat everyone by the skin of their teeth. Darnold has stumbled and recovered, they have great talent at the other skill positions and that Flores D is not to be underestimated. Minny has the Faltering Falcons this weekend.

-Green Bay has a balanced offense but they should try to ride Jacobs tonight-the Lions d-line has been crippled by injuries.

-Both squadoos are playing their third game in 12 days so expect more owies.

Have at it.

 

 

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King Hippo

ok, Buster. Save us from Extra Time!

litre_cola

Pick6? Yeah, pick 6.

Horatio Cornblower

One of the many names my cat goes by is Buster, and I’m reading this this morning and thinking “he didn’t move a muscle all night; there’s no way he got it done”

blaxabbath

Our Amazon login isn’t on this TV. So i have on the mst3k channel.

ArmedandHammered

Watched an Ed Wood masterpiece, even had Tor.

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xHGD6MGct2s

25/8/367, as long as the interwebz are functional.
Life isn’t so bad sometimes.

Unsurprised

Is there any Rust Belt team that has a defense?

WCS

The Stillers theoretically have one!

Brocky

I don’t care how many touchdowns my RB scores

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fleshwound_NPG

lions and vikings are going one-and-done in these playoffs
packers are going to win the super bowl
love is going to the hall of fame
but only with the one super bowl win
and a laughable stint with the ny jets

Bogdanski

I’ll take it. It’s what we deserve

Brocky

No

Brick Meathook

But what about the Maple Leafs?

fleshwound_NPG

theyll have to watch the new toronto wnba team win a title before them

litre_cola

Oh the women’s ice football club will win 1st for sure.

yeah right

No on any and every goddamn count.

fleshwound_NPG

for as brilliant as he seems, dan campbell is sometimes still a dumbass jock

blaxabbath

And Van Gogh cut off his ear. Genius+MeltingBrain sometimes gets to let it ride.

Brick Meathook

I just had cough medicine delivered to me (because I’m still sick as a dog) and the delivery girl was as cute as a button and spoke almost zero English. I asked her where she was from and she said Kurdestan, which I was absolutely not expecting.

What a lovely young lady.

Brocky

So when’s the wedding?

Brick Meathook

I’m old enough to mathematically be her grandfather, but if she ever needed help I’d come running.

Unsurprised

Lots of Kurds could benefit from chain immigration about now.

Gatoraids

Soon she will join the collection

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blaxabbath

Dude you need some medical care.

I hear UHC may be a little flexible on granting care this holiday season.

Brick Meathook

I have medical care, but thank you, doctor.

blaxabbath

I just wanted to make a UHC joke. You all know I’m indifferent about fake people.

Brick Meathook

What is UHC?

ArmedandHammered

United Health Care.

WCS

Utah Hawkey Club

ArmedandHammered

How much have the rich fucked up, that the first against the wall will be the CEOs and not the lawyers and politicians.

Horatio Cornblower

Hey!

WCS

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rockingdog

Not feeling rocking about playing Reed
Should have started MHJ instead
Bummer 😞

WCS

See, look who returned home.

Gumbygirl

He’s a good boy!

Unsurprised

Howdy, dude

LemonJello

It’s Amazon, couldn’t they have the bear shitting in the woods for that little bit about the NFC North?

fleshwound_NPG

no, it’s amazon; it should have been a teddy bear sold on amazon by a company spelled by chinese alphabet soup

King Hippo

MATHS FOR ALL!!!!!

Doktor Zymm

Maybe try PASSING to Gibbs? Or anyone else? Mostly care about the passing bit

King Hippo

hey, worked last 4th and goal!

Doktor Zymm

SEE!

Redshirt

Ded Zebra

Doktor Zymm

I had something similar happen to me at a punk show in Baltimore

King Hippo

Brocky is getting many JacobsPOINTZ. Perhaps God is taking a dump.

Brocky

Nah, he’s just waiting to break my heart for the Monday night game, like he did with jordy

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Redshirt

Oh, yeah. It’s the Lions

litre_cola

Does Sun God exist?!?!?

King Hippo

Sun God exists. God exists. But there is NO SUCH THING as the sun.

WCS

It’s nighttime, so clearly it’s ALL a myth

Gumbygirl

Not tonight, apparently

King Hippo

I love it when they create the illusion that someone as slender and purty as Charissa Thompson eats chicken wings

litre_cola

Missed the “New boot goofin” before the half thank Bleergh.

Brick Meathook

QUESTION: Which woman in the Canadian government has the biggest tits?

ballsofsteelandfury

Trudeau in drag AND blackface

Brick Meathook

Brownface

King Hippo

Frank Reynolds learned us it’s all about whether you use the right shade of shoe polish

King Hippo

I dunno if BC Dick invented the “Prime Minstrel” moniker, but he brung it here and I am grateful for it.

Brick Meathook

BC Dick is a fine bowler.

litre_cola

Great brother in law too

Brick Meathook

I think the Lions are going all the way to the postseason.

And then they’ll lose in the first game.

litre_cola

Yes please

ArmedandHammered

Is it possible to get a Lions vs. Bills super bowel? I would love to see Goodell’s fucking face when told that would be the match up.

Doktor Zymm

It would be especially fun if the Bills win and that causes Trump to have a fatal heart attack

Brick Meathook

Young Lady, Donald Trump is our next President!

(I did not vote for that cocksucker)

King Hippo

I don’t want to stay awake, but I do want to keep watching. Existential crisis, imminent.

Brick Meathook

We need to compare prescription meds, dude.

Also, I like cats.

King Hippo

They really are the bestest! Even if my oldest one is pissing me off by wanting to go in and outside every 5 minutes (he won’t use litterbox, but he hates how cold it is).

King Hippo

That’s proper clock management!

Senor Weaselo

The guy they named Knuckles has great lateral movement? I mean, duh, have they even played Sonic & Knuckles?

Spur

Jared Goff doesn’t want to named Tails?

fleshwound_NPG

sonic and knuckles sounds like things a single lady would buy if the last boyfriend was a tiny dicked asshole

Doktor Zymm

How many does Deanna Favre own?

fleshwound_NPG

first name basis at the local adult store

ArmedandHammered

The manufacturers use her to test new products, hence the 220 line in the bedroom.

Unsurprised

“I love it so much I bought the company!”

fleshwound_NPG

how in the hell does the packers have a cheese-named tight end

and how in the FUCK did love miss him

fleshwound_NPG
rockingdog

Establish the run to set up the pass??

I’m Flexing Reed in FF…. 🏈 😬
Hope he is Rocking!

Unsurprised

Just win, kitties

Unsurprised

Unrelated, by a coworker’s cat farted during a call earlier and now I’m crying laughing again

Doktor Zymm

I’ve never seen a bunny fart, but that’s the only possible pet fart that might be cuter than a cat fart you don’t have to smell

Doktor Zymm

Horse farts aren’t cute, but occasionally a horse will scare itself with its own fart and that is hilarious

ArmedandHammered

Very quiet, bunny farts. Vewy quiet, wabbit fawts. Read in your voice of choice.

Spur

I thought we agreed to call them the ThunderCats?

Unsurprised

I didn’t get that thing

ArmedandHammered

Only if they play in thundersnow.

Spur

It felt cathartic on Monday telling the sales staff to basically fuck off, go ask your new manager. I turned off my Teams by 9am, i have nothing to do with the new owners but consulting when they reached out.

I’m not dropping your Order. Fuck off, ask your new manager.
You need the buyers info and you’re too stupid to look in CRM. Fuck off, ask your new manager.
No idea if Tina took the offer. Fuck off, ask your new manager.
IT isnt picking calls. Fuck off, ask your new manager.

I cried at the end of day on Monday. It was awesome.

litre_cola

I feel for you internet NFL nemesis. I am staring down a lay off as well. My mood swings are wild.
I feel helpless and I can’t imagine how you feel. Get black out drunk. Can’t hurt.

Last edited 16 days ago by litre_cola
Spur

Hang on. Keep that stupid LinkedIn profile up to date.

litre_cola

Haven’t updated it since Harper was our Prime Minister, guess I should get on that. Got offered a job in Bermuda but would have to uproot the fam.

Doktor Zymm

Nothing in Bahama? Perhaps working for a pretty mama?

Spur

Gigolo gig in Bermuda?

litre_cola

Back to the wine servin/Maitr’D lyfe

blaxabbath

Can we open a second dispensary in Calgary?

We’ll stagger lunches.

blaxabbath

Deci is young. The time is now!!!

Doktor Zymm

Let’s see some long passing TDs, I need points off both these QBs to make playoffs in my superflex league

Doktor Zymm

Tonight’s advent cheese: Dill and Garlic Cheese Curds
They do NAWT go easy on the garlic and that is a very good thing. Cab Sav was absolutely the right choice to pair with this

Spur

Shit is getting real at work. The company that took over outsources its Ops Team from South Asia. My full team got laid off and I still on for 1 week of contract – “Consult” work. Told by their HR not to post hours unless booked for a meeting. It took them until Tuesday to speak to me. By then the Ops mailboxes we backed up since Nov 26. They tried to yell at me for not watching the Ops boxes – told them its no longer my job, I only consult on how to process the work.

Now their Teams are double booking my calendar for knowledge dumps, asking if I can stay past Friday. Hell no! I told them am out at 3pm on Friday. I going to the bar to DRINK!

Doktor Zymm

Hah, nerts to them!

(Although maybe check if they want to give you a shit ton of money )

Last edited 16 days ago by Doktor Zymm
Spur

Its $30/hr consulting – only for hours scheduled by meeting. I didnt even ask about the pay for the job offer from the CEO on Monday. Turned it down fast, I was moving on.

ArmedandHammered

Fuck man , sorry to hear that. I hope you can find employment soon as you so desire to be employed.

Spur

I landed a job the last day of old owner, start on Dec 16. its a big (evil) multinational Corp. I even got a slight raise at the new job. I was unemployed for 4 hours. I want to claim those hours of unemployment. The new CEO offered a job on Monday. Fuck no.

Horatio Cornblower

Um, if your new job is with United Health Care you might want to check the status…

Spur

I love how the masses were super snarky when told to feel sorry for this guy and his family.

ArmedandHammered

My first thought was “It’s a good start”.

Horatio Cornblower

This was my personal favorite

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Gumbygirl

Mine was “hey man, nice shot”

Unsurprised

Good. Fuck ‘em sideways

ArmedandHammered

I know, from a GB coach as well!

jjfozz

Got a new couch. It came in 15 boxes yesterday. Mrs. Fozz and I worked on it together, not a drop of blood was shed, but the term “you fucking asshole” came up a few times. I mean, she was being an asshole.

LemonJello

“Tell me more about this new couch.”
-Vice President-elect, “adjusting” his khaki trousers

Doktor Zymm

My cheese advent calendar arrived today so I’m snacking on some game-appropriate cheese curds while watching this game.

How is the Lions D this effective (even if they are roughing the passer) when they have 13 defensive players on IR? They have more players on IR than on the field!

Mr. Ayo

Dan Campbell discovered Tomlin’s VOODOO source?

fleshwound_NPG

not enough field goals and bullshit wins

Doktor Zymm

Both Pittsburgh and Detroit are pretty close to Ohio. Maybe they’re sapping the essence from Ohio teams?

Redshirt

Good. Goooood! Let’s the average flow through you.

jjfozz

So 25 days of cheese. I guess you’ll poop by Easter?

Doktor Zymm

It’s only 12, but they’re big (Wisconsin sized) portions so easily cover the full month. I think the key is to drink enough with the cheese to get the beer shits

ArmedandHammered

Why do you think most cheese sauces are made with some sort of alcohol?

Gumbygirl

That’s why she got the whiskey one too. It’s all about balance.

rockingdog

That’s Rocking! 🧀

ArmedandHammered

Welcome back. Have not seen you in awhile. Stepping out, really?

rockingdog

Jordan Love Toyotathon Theory?

Jordan Love Toyotathon Theory!

https://x.com/minakimes/status/1864453655749120410

Lmao! That’s Rockingggg!

Spur

Am worried for Boise tomorrow. They are setup for a great CFB Playoff seeding. This is too good for Boise and UNLV has a great offense.

jjfozz

“If you’re over 50, you should get the shingles vaccine.”

What they should have said was, “Hey, take this vaccine it’s going to make you feel like you’ve been sat on by the Raven’s offensive line, kicked in the balls, and then dunked in the Inner Harbor. Also, your arm will feel like you were knifed by an alternate universe Evil Fonzie.”

Fuck.

ArmedandHammered

Yeah, but still better than getting shingles.

litre_cola

Yep, my mom had some on her face a few years ago and didn’t dare go out in public in to the sun. She was also extremely embarrassed about how she looked.

Mr. Ayo

Are we still doing phrasing?

litre_cola

I can edit if need be!!!!

Spur

You do NOT want to get shingles. Had in 30’s. I couldn’t wear clothes for 7 days, any friction against my skin would kick off a pain storm.

ArmedandHammered

My best friend said that, even with all the physical pain all his issues caused by his myriad maladies, the only time he thought of self deletion was during shingles flares and the rest of the time he spent fearing the next flare.

Spur

Evening Folks.

Fuck Green Bay!

BeefReeferLives

2nd’ed. Puck the Fackers.

jjfozz

THEY RIDE BIKES TO PRACTICE

FROZEN TUNDRA

LOMBARDI

FANS OWN THE TEAM

Fuck ’em

Brocky

God:

👏👏👏👏👏

FUCK – YOU – BRO-CKY!!

👏👏👏👏👏

King Hippo

At least you and I can’t possibly start CJ Fuckface Stroud this week

litre_cola

Relegation is nigh.

fleshwound_NPG

yes, bears do NOT belong in this division with these guys

Brocky

Okay stop me if you’ve heard this one…

Someone you know MAY be starting Josh Jacobs and MAY be desperately needing him to have a big deal to make the playoffs

ArmedandHammered

Yes! Entertain me fuckers, I want this game to entertain me as I have smoked all my prepacked bowls and need to refill them.

litre_cola

My dispensary guy took a lunch and it was closed for 20 minutes. Rage is infinite right now. NO, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.

Brocky

I thought it was non habit forming!

ArmedandHammered

Not physically, but who wants to deal with this reality?

litre_cola

Nailed it!!!!

Redshirt

.

IMG_0450.jpeg
ArmedandHammered

Dude, dude you have no idea? I am as well.I had to have the I found the bowlls had already been repacked and had to smoke them.And then they werampty you get me so I had to repack um and smoke them again.So yeah awesome.

Redshirt

A&H 2nd Half (Artistic Interpretation)

IMG_0378.jpeg
ArmedandHammered

I wish edibles worked in a way other than at random for me.

King Hippo

Monty That Looked Easy To Me….

NotShogunButShogun

Cromulence or crapulence. I suspect both.

King Hippo

Seriously, the Fuck LioUns’ run blocking is sexy af

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hadn’t heard this one in a while.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=abeUTN9OB8I

ArmedandHammered

Love their stuff.

King Hippo

I just can’t make myself insert Christian Watson into the lineup. It would mean benching Drake London if Jakobi Meyers is healthy (and I think he just took a “maintenance” day off practice)

blaxabbath

Drake London?

Is you’re fantasy team from St Canard?

Redshirt

Okay, so maybe the Walrus is good after all?

BeefReeferLives

goo-goo g’joob, g’goo goo g’joob

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m at the grocery store in Little Tokyo and I’m gonna get LDB’d, I can just feel it.

Brick Meathook

Sawtelle?

Brick Meathook

Or DTLA because you live near there?

ballsofsteelandfury

DTLA is Little Tokyo. Sawtelle is Little Kyoto.

herodotus450

Do NOT go to Little Incheon right now

Brick Meathook

Little Lebanon is a hopping district in Los Angeles. Zankou Chicken!

litre_cola

Take me there. Top eats.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That one.

Redshirt

Thankfully, I’ve adjusted my December itinerary to reduce such risks.

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Brick Meathook

here’s some more artsy-fartsy self portraits. notice they are all reflections.

https://ibb.co/FxTjcx2

Brick Meathook

But none of these are good enough. Oh, they’re nice photos sure, but they’re not good enough.

King Hippo

In the context of all human endeavoUr is, has been, and always will be futile – it’s all good brutha.

Gumbygirl

That first one is very cool!

Brick Meathook

You should still have a veil on.

King Hippo

Rikki sent her a RAIDUHS track suit to cover the black aspect

BeefReeferLives

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