TGIF! Is Friday the 13th no longer a thing? Or am I just out of touch? Maybe I’m just lucky and it doesn’t apply to me.
Survival – Personal Edition
Let’s discuss wine. Ok, wine bottles. Ok, more specifically, wine bottle corks. They’re great! Until you’re trying to open a bottle and it breaks. Disaster! Not really, just use these tips to extract that life saving and affirming juice.
- If the cork is otherwise fine and only broke because of your ham-fisted us of a corkscrew, consider it a whole cork, and try again. Except this time, you’ll need to slow everything down. Screw in the corkscrew slowly to avoid further damage. Slowly and steadily pull the cork out. Jerking the on the cork will only increase the likelihood of cork breakage.
- If the cork is pushed too far into the bottle, finish the job and push it all the way into the bottle. Then jump below to the straining tips.
- If the cork itself is in bad shape or it’s stuck to the side of the bottle it may not be possible to extract it. In this case, use the cork as a drill to make a whole through the cork. To do this, use the corkscrew as normal but wiggle side to side to make an actual hole. Continue until the whole is large enough to pour the wine through.
- Now, we need to strain the wine. Unless you like chewing on chucks of cork as part of your tasting experience. You’ll need cheesecloth (clean, unwaxed, unbleached), a rubber band, and a decanter. A coffee filter (unbleached) can also be substituted. Place the cheesecloth or filter over the mouth of the decanter and secure it tightly with the rubber band.
- Pour the wine from the bottle through the filter into the decanter. When done, remove the cheesecloth and cork bits from the decanter.
Now let that freed wine breath if needed, or serve up. Either way that dastardly cork didn’t stop you from your wine. Enjoy!
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Survival – Species Edition
Time to put the sexy in Friday!
Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!
Took a call for a house fire three blocks away from where ex-wife and I lived for four years. In fact, we were living there when she tossed my drunk ass out.
Can’t blame her for that; can blame her for never reaching out to determine why I was depressed, and thus drinking as such. That part is irrelevant to this topic.
This here is quite a fire, it would seem. Just became a two-alarmer. That’s pretty rare for a single-family house in the burbs.
A lot of these gals are as proud of their asses as some house cats that I’ve known.
Show is your pink scrunchies!
Pink?✔️
Scrunchie?✔️
.
…
Don’t give away my plans for 2025!
Milaya is on the @midnite 2.0 right now
Solid week but a long work week.
My two new hires are crushing it.
Still early to say the best damn crew that I’ve assembled but the signs are pointing the right way.
I’ve also got the 23rd off so the granddaughters can take me to Knotts.
Haven’t been in years.
Sounds amazing.
Happy Friday peoples!
Be well Buddy
You as well.
One day, in Italy?
Don’t punch that guy!
It’s me and I want to shake your hand or give you a hug because it would be an honor to meet you and I owe you and your family dinner at least!
This guy is traveling now.
Some day some place. I look forward to it.
Be sure to get some high prices snacks just to not eat them. Give the granddaughters the real Theme Park Hosting Experience.
Drunk enough to remember leaving my shoes in the bathromm, old enough not to
Where are your shoes, Dude?
This is all getting dangerously close to donning pants… I can’t advise that at this time.
LDB – out.
Damn. You’ve had a hard ass week.
Hope you’re feeling better.
Hanging in there. Not 100% but better. Thanks for asking!
You’ve got a whole group wishing you well while also wincing at the same time.
Happy holidays!
Did you get the catheter out?
Good god i am so oblivious. I’m out of the ldbc, and have been every year since forever because I’ve finally realized the damn thing is on the peanuts christmas soundtrack. Never listened closely enough outside of the main movie songs. Cant believe I missed it, considering i have a whole bunch of albums where Guaraldi is leading or a backup that ive spent a ton of time with. I continue to disappoint myself
Fore warned is fore armed. Better luck next year.
Took an edible after dinner. Listened to tunes with the missus
Positive evening.
Think I’ll join you.
A bit late but the thought still remains.
Cheers my friend!
On the set of The Shining (1980) director Stanley Kubrick asked star Jack Nicholson to pose for a photo. Nicholson obliged, not knowing that Kubrick was actually taking a self-portrait with his daughter Vivian.
I always assume people taking selfless are actually just taking photos of me.
Just because you’re crazy and paranoid, doesn’t mean they’re NOT following you.
A few weeks before he died, Gumby got a summons for jury duty for the first week of January. Guess who got a summons today for the first week of January?
The Cult?
You guys are not good guessers!
Robert Smith.
Frank Stallone
.
Go and pretend you are Robert Smith!
My hair is starting to look like his. Not 80’s Robert, today Robert.
Save us GumbyGirl
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AH8emRsQcg
The Cure is never not funny:
Or so the Germans would have us believe.
Ian Astbury?
Old Robert
Oh, so Robert Smith is a few decades away from becoming Beetlejuice.
Technicolor 3-strip camera, ca 1939. To this day still the finest color motion picture system ever developed.
Beauty!
Crew served cameras. Back when men were men damn it.
Thanks Mr Ayo. Holiday quality work here tonight. I have eyes for lady number 3… but you probably figured that.
Love Dee!
Ella Fitzgerald, Beach Boys. I love this bar. And I feel in no LDS danger
Ella Christmas Island, CANOE GIFTS
Now Johnny B Goode
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkf0ll-4CvA
Well get yer lampshade on and dance gurl!
I mean you really shouldn’t feel Latter Day Saints danger in *any* bar.
That’s where my brain went, too.
It’s Big Bad Voodoo Daddy!
Saw a free show they played in Ballsitchmore at Pier something.
Horrible opening band and a car in the parking lot nearby caught fire and was a welcome distraction
I think it’s why the show is called that
I see you are also the correct amount of high. Congrats!
Enjoying some Friday night bar reading at my corner bar in Chicago. It’s almost freezing out, positively balmy, I have an Old Fashioned and a booky book, the Bulls are leading, and I can effectively ignore all that isn’t right with the world. Cheers!
What book?
Finishing up The Devil’s Chessboard. Great book but I haven’t had enough reading time over the past month so been slower than usual
I just started The Executioners Song and it clocks in at 1000 or so pages and I can already tell I’m gonna blaze through it.
If that’s the series I think it is then well worth the blaze
https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/other/advisor-to-robert-f-kennedy-jr-petitioned-fda-to-withdraw-polio-vaccine/ar-AA1vPBpX
MAKE AMERICA 1824 AGAIN
Was that year racist enough for them?
Slavery still had another four decades to go, so yeah, most likely.
McConnell had polio as a kid. That’s why he limps.
I thought he limped due to lack of spine.
I disagree with him on most things, but he was solid on Covid
I don’t understand why you guys are so worried about these idiots making vaccines optional.
It’s speeding up the thinning of the herd!
While true, these dickless pieces of excrement are setting up my kids’ lives for misery.
A) it’s kids that’ll mostly die
B) optional means barriers to access and therefore more difficult for everyone to get vaxxed
RFK is so much worse than he’s portrayed. I feel bad for him because of all his relatives being assassinated when he was a kid, but dear god this man should have no power and he should probably crochet instead of knit because of the access to sharp objects
I love you, balls. You’re a dear amigo, but I’m genuinely pissed off about this.
He’s trying to remove the approval of the vaccine.
Which means no one will be able to get it, whether they want it or not.
Which means all kids will be able to get polio, whether they want it or not.
No one will let him do that. Luigi’s doppelgangers will ensure that.
“They won’t actually repeal Roe v. Wade…”
I never said that
I can’t speak to that, but plenty of people did, under the assumption that it would be “electoral suicide”.
It’s highly unlikely he can actually revoke approval, but hey, it’s the thought that counts. He’s down with killing kids and he’ll manage it
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, killing kids? That’s entirely unnecessary. You just make it very clear that if they tell anyone, no one will believe them. They’ll say they made the whole thing up.” – Matt Gaetz
‘doomed kids are the hottest kids’
-also Matt Gaetz
I am exactly the optimal level of high right now. If I could just be this way predictably, then I wouldn’t really hate life so much.
The good news is that she will make a fuck ton of money in the eventual lawsuit. This is 100% protected speech.
US woman arrested for allegedly threatening health firm: ‘Delay, deny, depose’ https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/dec/13/florida-woman-health-insurance-threat?CMP=share_btn_url
Fact.
Though saying “You people are next!” may be a bit too much.
On a customer service line? Like they don’t hear worse a dozen times a day
But rich people are scared now. It’s different.
Me to rich people: suck it up buttercup
That image was drawn by Jesse Duquette, who was a high school classmate of mine!
I got an electric cork remover and it is a game changer. Electricity is great!
Yeah, those are great.
Boxed wine does not have a cork
-DFO sommelier degens
And fizzy wine doesn’t require an opener either, although you can’t go wrong with a saber or machete
New test: Ranking blades to see which is best at opening sparkling bottles!
Battery operated but still great over here.
Corded is way better than battery-powered!
Wait, we’re talking about wine bottle openers? Carry on.
Counterpoint: you can’t electrocute yourself with a battery-operated device.
Not true. You can. You just probably won’t kill yourself. Depending on the battery, of course.
#4 should really have a jacket.
Meh, looks like a nice day
-Canadian DFO folks
Sexy Friday Miscommunication?
#2 for me this week although I love #8’s dress!