Your Thirsty Thursday Open Thread

All the threads are open these days, aren’t they? Oh well…

It was fun reading the comments in DJ Taj’s post today. Whenever something of significance occurs you can always count on the commentariat to bring it. I couldn’t participate because, you know, work. The month of May is a bastard because as the weather changes businesses ramp up and there’s a ton of crap to do. Today I learned that a ribbed (for her pleasure) tomato’s going price is $2.50 per pound! Also, breaded chicken cheese bites are surprisingly inexpensive. So it goes…

NFL news: (there’s not much but I’ll make do)

From Jags to Bitches: The Trent Baalke Erasure continues. Gabe Davis and his three routes has been cut. Yes, the owner of the Long Crosser, the Go! thingy and the End Zone Jump Ball was shown the door just 14 months after being signed. Baalke paid him near-WR1 money and Brian Thomas Jr. passed him on the depth chart like he was standing still. 20 catches in 10 games? Welcome to your League Veteran Minimum Years, Gabe.

Hubba Chuba: Ever make a decision that ended up looking waaaay better than it actually was because of future events that were completely out of your control? It’s happened to me a few times in my business life and I was given far too much credit. But I yoinked that credit. Hard. The Panthers inexplicably gave Chuba Hubbard an extension after having drafted his potential replacement in Jonathan Brooks. Yes, Brooks was rehabbing an ACL but when he was right he would take the RB1 job away from the effective plodder that was Chuba. Not so fast, Sergei Eisenstein. Of course we know that Brooks blew his wonky knee out again (feel sorry for the kid) and it’s just been announced that he’s missing the entire 2025 season. Chuba is locked up and has no leverage and if by some miracle Brooks can regain form in ’26 the Panthers can get out of the former’s contract. SMRT! (but in a backward ass way-after all, this team is run by a drink-tossing hothead)

Cocaine Cowboy Alert!

Cackalacky at Washington Ovaries starts at 7EST

Hoilers Rules at Knights of Ni begins at 9:30 Best Time

Do Your Blurst!

 

 

 

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We’re shopping for home goods. I just realized that I got tricked into traveling 5000 miles to go to IKEA.

Sharkbait

But how are the meatballs?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

By contrast to yesterday, currently Rikki is NOT hungry so he doesn’t mind a bit if the Dr. Mrs. kills half an hour at H&M while he ogles Swedish women tarting it up in their 39° and rainy finery.

2Pack

One of the finest past times for men in Euro shopping platz…

WCS

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Say hi to her majesty for me.

Unsurprised

Which one of you did they steal this from?

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Unsurprised

Love the banner quote.

WCS

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Artist’s conception of me, looking at the call map, and reading the current situation in McKeesport.

Sharkbait

If I’m Hill I’m absolutely screaming at the official for the missed trip before that.

Mr. Ayo

And the Oil Boys totally redeem themselves!

Good night knights.

ballsofsteelandfury

Thank God for you fine folks. If I hadn’t checked the site, I wouldn’t have known we were in OT and I wouldn’t have gotten my Thursday Night dose of Stanley Cup Cocaine!

Mr. Ayo

Just a small hit of it, but still great.

WCS

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Sharkbait

Holy shit they killed the major. Barely but they did.

Last edited 9 months ago by Sharkbait
ballsofsteelandfury

Killing off a five minute major… Wow

Mr. Ayo

What a stupid fucking penalty. WOW.

Sharkbait

Against that powerplay too.

Mr. Ayo

Indeed. Surprised they’ve lasted this long.

Mr. Ayo

Well if the Oil Boys lose these 5 minutes were the reason.

Sharkbait

Well that was a dumb penalty to take

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Which of you is in Phoenix now? Blax? Which beer should I get at the airport before this awful red eye?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I don’t love the beer I got, but at least I’m not the one at the airport microbrewery bar who just ordered a long island ice tea

Sharkbait

But .. Why

WCS

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Because it’s the strongest, cheapest thing they offer.

Sharkbait

If you’re Pickard, why not say you need a minute after your teammate checked someone into your leg and the ref asks if you’re ok?

Last edited 9 months ago by Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Vegas Oilers with some bananacakes potential

Mr. Ayo

FREE BANANACAKES OIL BOYS AND KNIGHTS!

Sharkbait

The Oilers really like spotting teams goals don’t they.

WCS

Because they apparently don’t matter.

WCS

There is a troubling lack of hawkey on any of the TV at work right now. I don’t know how they expect us to perform potentially life-saving duties if we can’t watch grown men chase each other on a slick, hard surface, gliding on razor blades at speed, and carrying wooden clubs.

Mr. Ayo

The clubs are composite carbon fiber these days. Much more bendy to really get the whiplash effect when slashing or high sticking.

Sharkbait

Even the goalie sticks are carbon fiber. I just replaced my wood/fiberglass one and the difference is night and day. I found myself poke checking more than I really used to because it’s so light.

litre_cola

Less Fibre than wood ones.

Doktor Zymm

I did enjoy the empty net Caps goal

rockingdog

Has there ever been anybody besides JD Vance to be specifically repudiated by two popes inside of six years of converting to Catholicism?

LoL

SonOfSpam

Just an incredible rate of pope-disappointment.

Gonna assume Usha’s maiden name is Pope.

WCS

“Davenport”

Doktor Zymm

Henry the Eight maybe?

Sharkbait

Splitter of churches, and ladies.

Doktor Zymm

And breeches, if the tales about the size of his royal ass are true

WCS

Royal (nobility) ass is the best ass.

SonOfSpam

Very appropriate for today. This guy is awesome. Was touring the world as a goofy but talented musician (the Weird Al of his day kinda), then said screw it, became a super smart professor and scientist, and is still kickin at age 95.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3f72CTDe4-0&pp=ygUWdG9tIGxlaHJlciB2YXRpY2FuIHJhZw%3D%3D

Dunstan

He wrote a satirical “college fight song” that was so good that Harvard just shrugged and said, “yeah, we’ll go with that.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeU3UpTply0

2Pack

Ciao tutti

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WCS
Last edited 9 months ago by WCS
Doktor Zymm

I do enjoy most of those things!

Mr. Ayo

Of all the regrets I have from growing up, it turns out my biggest one has to be not paying enough attention to the Simpsons to prepare me for life online.

herodotus450

Former Senators playing in this Edmonton-Vegas matchup who were foolishly traded away by an embarrassment of a franchise because: 1
Former Red Wings playing in this Edmonton-Vegas matchup who were graciously traded away to let them win a Cup and if they win it counts for Detroit: 3
Checkmate Canada.

Don T

Speaking of the Washington Ovaries (🤣😅😝 btw), I went to visit a friend at the hospital today. He told he was dating a lady “with a vash bigger than your face”. Reason to live ✔️, he’ll pull through.

Linguistic note: He said “bollo”, which in español is more endearing than “pussy”. We romantic like that.

Doktor Zymm

I feel like the ideal size for lady parts is just very slightly larger than the gentleman parts that they’re having fun with, so congrats to your friend and good health as well!

Last edited 9 months ago by Doktor Zymm
Don T

I used to think of ideal, but getting a handle on normal proved idealistic.

2Pack

/ Refuses to take the bait…

SonOfSpam

but how else you gonna catch a snapper

SonOfSpam

“They’re all too big”

-B. Favre

Sharkbait
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Something something because of the echo.

/that’s a Predator* reference

*the movie not Justin Tucker

Doktor Zymm

Fun fact: “Canes” is also the name of Singapore’s hockey team

SonOfSpam

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herodotus450

Old family recipe for you: try some ketchup on there eh buddy?

2Pack

Your Ninja skills have reached their peak.

fleshwound_NPG

so does the new ‘nova pope unite the old Big East or what

herodotus450

New pope? I feel like St. Augustine of Hippo after his conversion by Ambrose of Milan

Doktor Zymm

So a sort of general misogyny?
Any other Hippo or Hippo adjacent noun >> Augustine of Hippo

Don T

I said SHUT YOUR UGLY FACE FLANDERS 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Redshirt

I need to send out feelers to PNC Park. See if they’re open to relocating to Cincinnati and converting to a football field.

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WCS

“It’s like, he doesn’t ‘get’ us, man.”
“WE’RE ABOUT YOU.”

Sharkbait

Never fails to make Mrs. Sharkbait laugh whenever she needs one:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tt8Iwf_87eY

WCS

Alia looking at the camera isn’t acting; she was a real reaction, and genuinely thought Cross was injured.

Doktor Zymm

BLT, Yuengling, hockey. Good start. The conversations around me can eavesdrop on aren’t great but should improve.

WCS

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Never much of a Mountain Dew fan, but this is surprisingly tasty and refreshing.

SonOfSpam

Add rum and perhaps a barbiturate.

Last edited 9 months ago by SonOfSpam
WCS

I’ll cede those to you.

ballsofsteelandfury

I’ve been buying them in bulk at Smart n Final

SonOfSpam

Well, yeah, they take a break between periods. It’s intentional.

BeefReeferLives

“But I yoinked that credit. Hard.”

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Gumbygirl

You’ll end up with hairy palms. Degenerates!