Es Verdad: There’s a Game in Spain, No Need To Explain

See how I went all Spanish up in there? It weren’t taught to pasty white boys in the wilds of Ontario in the 80’s, I can tell you that much.

To The Game!

Commies/Fins:

-I’m always curious to read up on how major cities came to be and if they’re not on a coast they’re almost always on a river. It’s all about various peoples trading goods it seems. That river that brought folks together would be the Manzanares which doesn’t rank very high as far as familiarity is concerned.

-Both these squads are sitting at 3-7 and if Miami can get a “home” win here McDaniel will have weathered the storm for yet another week, to everyone’s surprise. Though if he were to be fired on the tarmac at the airport (remember when that happened to Lane Kiffin?) he would have no problem just hitch hiking around the country with his bindle.

-The city didn’t really start feeling it oats until about the 9th or 10 Century, surprisingly-though it is mentioned in the 8th. Various archeological digs have revealed buildings constructed by the Celts, Romans and Visigoths.

-Washington has no QB, wide receivers or secondary so a W here looks unlikely.

-No one can say with any certainty what the etymology of Madrid is. All the guesses revolve around water, with ‘ford’, ‘fountain’ or ‘stream’ being thrown against the wall.

-Good news for Achane owners that saw him rush for 175 yards vs Buffalo (including sprints of 53 and 35 yards) just last week. Washington’s D is ranked 30th overall and the run defense sits at 23rd.

-Despite being the seat of power for Spanish royalty since 1594 it only took another 200 years for Charles The Third to say, “Hey, let’s develop some infrastructure up here, maybe some street lighting, some sewers, maybe a cemetery on the outskirts of our fair town whadda ya say?” So there was plenty of poverty and sickness and disease to that point.

-Is Bobby Wagner’s play ever going to fall off? At the age of 35 he’s second in the league in tackles.

-Famous folks born in Madrid include Placido Domingo, Francisco Umbral (I read one of his books), Jose Ortega y Gassett (philosopher), Julio Iglesias, David De Gea and Juan Gris (a Cubist painter).

Good Morning!

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Jimbo

.
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Mr. Ayo

¡cambio repentino!

Don T
Last edited 3 months ago by Don T
King Hippo

He will be incredible or a dumpster fire. No in-between-sies

Horatio Cornblower

Try the 63-yard FG, you putas!

Redshirt

CAÑA‘LOR!

King Hippo

EXTRA TIME

Horatio Cornblower

Has McDaniels been fired yet? I see no reason to wait until the end of the game.

Wakezilla

“To pay tribute to our wonderful host nation, should this game go to overtime, we will have a shootout that will see both place kicker kick field goals from 50 yards until there is a winner”

Wakezilla

Are teams not allowed to kick field goals? Take the three points and the lead late in the game

Redshirt

Agreed. The head coach just all but told his defense “I have no faith in you”.

Redshirt

Miami just reached Peak LOLfins.

Mr. Ayo

Free football?!?

GlorioUs tie?!?

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

I’m just here so I don’t get fined

Slept in today as I’ve got a man cold
Remembered to check my line up’s today and had 2 guys out.

Mr. Ayo

WEST VIRGINIA!

Redshirt

Tua: (spends ten seconds point off left tackle)
Fans: “I think they’re going to run off lack tackle.”
Commentators: “I think they’re going to run off left tackle.”
Commanders: “OH MY GOD! WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO DO?!”

Wakezilla

Gotta pay extra for that

Gatoraids

Zach Oafz

King Hippo

I could use MOAR MariotaPoints here

Redshirt

No points for anybody!

King Hippo

tuff butt FARE

Gumbygirl

I have been here the whole time.

Doktor Zymm

It’s true! I saw you when I came in!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Bill Parcells is the real trickster here; what with fooling me into doing all this research into this and other Filipino softcore movies.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok, back to walking!

Jimbo

-Nawt Greg Abbot.

Doktor Zymm

Think the Dolphins are good because of last week’s win over the Bills? You probably stayed at a Holiday Inn Express!
https://onemileatatime.com/news/holiday-inn-express-carbon-monoxide-disaster/

Jimbo

Yes, a questionable approach.

Carbon monoxide detectors weren’t required in the rooms since the fuel-burning appliances were in the boiler room, though that seems like a questionable approach. 

King Hippo

At least it’s moving along briskly.

Mr. Ayo

Just got here. WTF are the LOLfins doing? 3 points?

Mr. Ayo

Wait, 6 points. And now Mariota is ded. Fun game.

Jimbo

He’ll be fine, in Espańa Toradol es gratis.

Doktor Zymm

Neither team has 3 points, so you should maybe go back to sleep lol

Mr. Ayo

There’s a 3 in 13 dammit!

Doktor Zymm

And 6 = 2*3, but is still neither 2 nor 3

Mr. Ayo

I’m declaring today a write off. I’m going to eat breakfast and then start drinking post haste.

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Where can one get a bottle?
-litre and zymm

Jimbo

I was told there would be no math.

Doktor Zymm

I’m entertained that we ended up with a bikini pic for a game in the city that is the furthest away from a beach that you can get in Spain

Horatio Cornblower

Pretty sure Hippo picked that one for the abundance of shoulders.

Don T

Madrid’s Hombres G. Yoooooge in the 80s, answer the question: how to deal, badly, when tour GF is cheating on tou with an Indiana Jones lookalike
https://youtu.be/eJLwj6FohJo?si=1K5CXqPV-JzlL5hH

Doktor Zymm

Were commercials always this bad and I’m just burnt out on them now, or are they actually more terrible than they used to be?

Fronkenshteen

I have been noticing a creative slump on Madison Ave. as well.

Horatio Cornblower

“If they’re good enough for our submarines then they can take a Thai pounding”

-Old Polish saying

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

THIS GUY RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY I CALL HIM MATT GAETZ BECAUSE THE PERSON HE NORMALLY HAS INTIMATE RELATIONS WITH SLEPT OVER AT A FRIEND’S HOUSE LAST NIGHT.

Redshirt

That first half will teach Spain not to mess with the US of A. The USS Maine is avenged!

Don T

/looks down in anger, runs hands through hair

pass

Don T

The best poem about Madrid (ymmv, excerpt):

Birds visit the psychiatrist.
Stars forget to come out.
Death passes in white ambulances,
Let’s say I’m talking about Madrid.
The sun is a butane stove.
Life is a Metro about to leave.
There is a syringe on the sink,
Let’s say I’m talking about Madrid.

Let’s say I’m talking about Madrid.

Don T
Horatio Cornblower

I’m just here so I don’t get fined.

And to learn a lot about Madrid, it seems.

NotShogunButShogun

Can we have a Pamplona run through the stadium?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

WOOOOOOOOO!!!!

[runs through Estadio Bernabéu wearing nothing but a San Fermín bandana wrapped around his wing-wang, being chased by several bulls]

Redshirt

You have to appreciate the Shield’s lack of luck in trying to explain the sport in hopes of getting a couple of teams overseas all paid for with their money, only to get boring game after boring game thus reducing the urge to build stadiums for rich guys.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I like that we’re taking our bread and circuses and gladiator combat and all the other trappings of our decaying empire worldwide!

Don T

¡Presente! Just been neck-deep into house chores, which get derailed upon every mention of Real Madriz /spits on floor, mops area again
Loved the preview. Ortega y Gasset shout out!! “I’m myself and my circumstance” is his most quoted sentence in español.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m always curious to read up on how major cities came to be and if they’re not on a coast they’re almost always on a river.

I always found that fascinating about Johannesburg – it’s got no significant waterway to speak of. The whole reason it’s there is because of the gold. It’s basically just a mining town that got bigger and bigger and bigger.

Redshirt

Usually it’s some technological evolution to allow it happen. Aqueducts. Trains. Highways. It’s part of the reason why the Eastern US is so compacted yet Western US is so spread out.

Horatio Cornblower

Dallas-Ft. Worth is, I read somewhere, the biggest US city with no major waterway.

I imagine Dallas was chosen for its clear lines of fire site lines.

herodotus450

That only works if there are lots of attractive cousins in the area, though.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Someone get me some churros y chocolate, de repente.

Col. Duke LaCross

¡Es una hermosa mañana para catorce horas de fútbol obligatorio!

Don T

Oh sí. Ese es el plan.

King Hippo

Name a funner word than obligatorio YOU CAN’T!!!

Don T

Ah, español can always blindside youse with an even trippier word, like DESANGELADO, i.e., without an angel literally. Figuratively, tou can imagine

Fronkenshteen

Do they not have the 10-foot tall playclock counting down directly in front of the quarterbacks face in the Europe games? What seems to be the issue here?

LemonJello

Who’s taking attendance for this mandatorium?

I don’t want to be marked absent/fined.

/dick joke

ArmedandHammered

Can we be mentally absent? Pretty sure i have the emotional part down pat.

King Hippo

oh si, my brain is barely above comatose

Redshirt

I’m here because I volunteered for overtime, only to be told to show up to work at 8 AM on Sunday.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m here but a) am not watching because I don’t have access to the NFL network and b) will disappear to walk the dog and do other chores shortly.

King Hippo

Started Mariota over Tua, expecting to end up in fencing pose

ArmedandHammered

So what’s the betting line on Tua getting another concussion.

King Hippo

YES

ArmedandHammered

I have a feeling this is a real prop bet some where.

Gatoraids

NFL knew Spain would be a fan of abstract meaningless violence so they brought to them the tragedy of Fins vs Commies.

dolphinsCommandersOriginalsmall
Doktor Zymm

Guernicommie!

King Hippo

That’s really delightful innit?

Fronkenshteen

Really? This is how you decide to dress to sing your national anthem on foreign soil? Well, off you go, I guess?

blaxabbath

I thought Spain used Portuguese?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And I thought Italy used a King

Don T

Huh. Never took Blax for a Philip II stan

Redshirt

Well, fine then! I’ll just put my disposable income in Mutual Funds and a Deposit Certificates, like an adult would!

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blaxabbath

Wait. Prohibit prop bets so we get some Blaxox scandals?

You’ll never go broke betting on the stupidity of the American public.

Redshirt

The Mobs can’t get rich; only Oligarchs and Billionaires. It’s the American way.

Fronkenshteen

I had this cooking Thursday night until Henderson mysteriously disappeared for most of the second half. Maybe we should call it quits on the prop bets. Too much temptation.

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Redshirt

That’s why I limit myself from the marathon parlays. If I do one, I’ll also split it into two or three smaller ones in case the last leg decides to sneak out early to beat traffic.

Doktor Zymm

Madrid cervecerias are one of the best ways in the world to enjoy a cold beer and some food. I feel like the best ones always have the metal chairs out front and those diner-style napkin dispensers
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Fronkenshteen

Third day of mystery illness and a brain packed with a galaxy of over-the-counter snake oils. Listening to a lot of these fellas. who knew multiple 12-string electrics all pulsating at once could relieve sinus pressure? Thanks Anton! Fins are going to fucking smash today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g23n6qzfhuc

Redshirt

Here…

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King Hippo

gotcha homey