Subsequent GTD reflections

Hello there fellow DFO’er.  Hope you’re well today.  And thanks for coming back to see last weeks comments of the week as decided by my brain.  There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.

This weeks cheesy motivational quote is:
In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years [in bed].
Abraham Lincoln

So, go nap when tired. Hopefully you being in bed is sleeping or other fun activities and not being sick.

As a reminder, Sunday comments stand alone and Monday comments will go on the next week’s post.

Note that during the offseason, I’ll probably look at the Sunday posts.

Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.

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I can’t believe he’s still hanging around here but I’ll take a shot at Aaron Hernandez [in the TE draft]. He had that real killer instinct you want in a player, doesn’t matter if it’s friend or foe, he’d take them out.

You know, with murder.
Senor Weaselo

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Words of wisdom:

BeefReeferLives

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This has nothing to do with the draft, but Gumby just got us tickets to see the Cure in October, yay!
Gumbygirl

Nice! Where?
ballsofsteelandfury

One of the Indian casinos in Rancho Mirage. Agua Caliente.
Gumbygirl

You sure it wasn’t The Cult?
SonOfSpam

It better not be.
Gumbygirl

Oh. My .God. He’s a fucking idiot. We have two tickets to the fucking Cult. At least they’re cheap seats, lol!
Gumbygirl

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Gumbygirl
July 31, 2023 10:47 pm
Ugh, it’s not even 9. When will this stupid, stupid day be over?!!!
Gumbygirl

sorry, no cure for a bad day
SonOfSpam

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Canuck ladies soccer squadoo was so bad this morning. The keeper was…I just don’t know what she was doing as far as positioning. I’m not saying the Canucks could have won. No Way. But they could have done better than the final result. Sinclair needs to hang up the cleats, Beckie needs to recover from injury and a re-set is in order.
scotchnaut

Canadian Men’s National Team: “We just totally shat the bed at the World Cup.”
Canadian Women’s National Team: “Hold our Molson.”
Dunstan

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One night on patrol, I was looking for suitable fording sites along a stretch of river. That involved walking around in the friggin river at 3 in the morning. Heading back to the patrol base, as point man, I hit a German cow catcher strand of electrified wire, at dick level, in wet pants. You remember things like that.

2Pack

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Fun story about local radio.

So the host asked a former NFL player (HOX legend Hugh Millen) about his thoughts on concussions and CTE.

Well Hugh Miller, he had some thoughts and delivered.

He started with the analogy about chopping wood. He said if you don’t normally use your hands, say golfing 3 times a week, you’d chew up your hands chopping that wood. Because you see, you’d have calluses on your hands to protect them.

He then extrapolated that to taking shots to the head in practice. He thinks we may look back at this time and realize we made a mistake by not having moar head hits in the offseason to develop a proper brain callus that could withstand a football season.

He definitely has a brain callus.
Mr. Ayo

Oh that is 100% science that a scientist scienced up in a science lab
Doktor Zymm

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There’s no way Indy ever got tenure
Doktor Zymm

Stealing artifacts for Whitey got MANY people tenure. Mostly white guys.
WCS

publish or perish, snake-fearing attention whore
SonOfSpam

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Mr. Ayo

I guess the Oxy is really kicking in
Brick Meathook

Just woke up from a three hour nod off due to oxy and vodka.

Time to try that again.
Mr. Ayo

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So, this guy volunteered to do the Jaguras preview this morning and the Right Reverend approved me. Now what? How do I submit my work? Is there a format preference?
LemonJello

Write it on a computer machine and email it to the address that rev gave you.

Then await the hazing.

And thank you.
litre_cola

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DR. MRS. DEADLY, ESQ.: [buys a cheesecake to bring to her cousin’s tomorrow, begins loading it into the car trunk along with several other things]

RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Make sure that cheesecake doesn’t tip over.

DR. MRS. DEADLY, ESQ.: It’ll be fine.

You’ll never guess what happens next!
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What kind of cheesecake was it?
Senor Weaselo

At the moment it’s plain (so tipping over wasn’t technically that big of a deal, it’s just irritating when your warnings get ignored) but I’ll be making a blueberry compote to go with it.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Perhaps lead with the solution THEN point out her fuck up.

Women like that kind of romantic stuff. ”

-J Mixon, Cincinnati WKRP
blaxabbath

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President Trump is being arrested for you. He has not committed any crimes. Obama/Biden has ordered the DOJ to indict him. For the record…America has been hijacked by Satanic Marxist Pedophiles…that are arresting their Political Opponents…and they’re coming for you next.

— Liz Churchill (@liz_churchill10) August 3, 2023

blaxabbath

So many people believe this shit. A really strong COVID variant would help.
SonOfSpam

God, enough with the “cult vs cure” stuff already.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Delay of Game in the 4th Quarter of a preseason game should be a hanging offense.
The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

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My ex hired the law offices of Ben-Jarvus-Green-Ellis for our divorce proceedings so I had to settle for Dorian-Thompson-Robinson
herodotus450

Whoever gave Ben-Jarvus Green-Ellis the nickname “Law Firm” deserves all the beer.
SonOfSpam

[raises hand]
I did it. It was me.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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I just got home turned on my TV and they showed a video of Aaron Rodgers and I am now sick of Aaron Rodgers. Can Tom Brady came back?
Redshirt

Let’s not say things we don’t mean
The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

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Kellen Mond is:
-The largest Mountain on Uranus (heh)
-The largest Iroquois burial ground this side of Halifax, or
-The largest bundle of nerve endings in the vago-centric region if you know what I mean
herodotus450

Today at the DMV they had a screen showing dumb human interest stories, and one showed a picture of an enormous pearl set in an engagement ring. The caption said the bride to be found it in her clam. Hehehe.
Gumbygirl

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THESE BROWNS, I CALL THEM THE IRAQI REPUBLICAN GUARD BECAUSE THEY’RE INEFFECTIVE AGAINST THE JETS THAT ARE KILLING THEM.
LemonJello

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I CALL THIS JETS TOUCHDOWN THE MIDDLE EAST IN 1948 BECAUSE ISREAL SEEMS TO BE LEGIT.
scotchnaut

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So…. has anyone else here actually visited the hall of fame?

I understand no one willingly goes to Ohio, but of you’re forced to, it’s worth a detour
Brocky

Gumby has been there many times. I never have. He loves it.
Gumbygirl

Given his recent concert purchase, maybe he loves The Hall of Frames in Utica?
scotchnaut

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Today I learned that ChatGPT does NAWT speak Hippoese, I asked for a preview of this game in hippoese and got this:
“In a grand celebration of mighty gridiron warriors, the NFL Hall of Fame Game is set to begin in the magnificent land of Hippoese! Gather ’round, all you wild hippos, as we witness the clash of champions from seasons past. The air is thick with excitement as these football giants gather to showcase their strength and skill in a spectacle like no other.
Amidst the roaring fans, you will witness legends of the past stepping onto the hallowed turf once more. The echoes of their triumphs resonate through the savannah, as they come together to honor their greatness and immortalize their names in the Hall of Fame. These colossal beings, each with a story of valor and perseverance, are ready to leave their indelible mark in the annals of Hippoesean history.”
Doktor Zymm

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Sounds delicious, please fax one over.
SonOfSpam

404: Drink Not Found Go To A Bar
Horatio Cornblower

stupid firefox
SonOfSpam

Opera
WCS

– the type of concert that Gumby actually bought tickets for while attempting to attend an Iron Butterfly show

ALTERNATELY

– the type of reservation Gumby obtained while trying to book himself a haircut
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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THIS SWISS KEEPER I CALL HER ANTONIO CROMARTIE’S KIDS, BECAUSE SHE’S OUT THERE BY HERSELF WITH NO SUPPORT WHATSOEVER.
Horatio Cornblower

I haven’t seen this many exploitable holes since my time on Epstein’s island.
Mr. Ayo

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The USWNT is doomed. Carli Lloyd was right.
TheRevanchist

“Dynasties don’t last forever”
-Anastasia Romanov
Doktor Zymm

1
Reply

Horatio Cornblower
Editor
Reply to Doktor Zymm
August 4, 2023 11:44 pm
“Tell me about it”

-Some princess, glaring at WCS
Horatio Cornblower

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Sophie Gregoire Trudeau is back on the market!*

*petitions the RCMP yet again to void their 200 meter restriction
scotchnaut

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-Next time will be better
“I’m not letting you knock me up again.”

— Princess
WCS

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/played a version of poker earlier today

Me: “Let’s do the half-lake swim!”

Wifey: “Alright.”

Me: “I can’t find my swim shorts!”

Wifey: “I guess you’ll have to swim naked.”

Me: [looks around one last time, can’t find my shorts] [Also, I’m a few beers in] “Fuck it. I’m skinny dipping.”

Wifey: “NO! WAIT!” [runs frantically to a pile of freshly washed clothes] Here they are!”

tl:dr-I called my wife’s bluff. I didn’t really win anything though.
scotchnaut

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https://www.espn.com/soccer/report/_/gameId/672366

WCS

Milton Keynes Dons? This is a job for JokeBot!
Input: Milton Keynes, Keynsian Economics, Don Corleone, Mafia, Soccer, Guvnas, Milton Green Milton Green Milton Green Milton Green Milton Green needs a Kidney
JokeBot 3001: “…Computing….”
JokeBot 3001: “Hacha, Hadrian’s Wall was a smaller barrier than the disagreement on interest rates at this G8 Summit meeting!”
Ah dammit, the Dennis Miller Module is acting up again.
herodotus450

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Don T

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Don T

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Oi, i’m at the Netherlands vs South Africa match, AMA
BrettFavresColonoscopy

What’s the crowd like?
ballsofsteelandfury

I haven’t seen this many Dutch people since….well December when I was in Amsterdam I guess.
BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Played another 9 holes today, shot a 55, but ended with a par. I’ll take it!
Sharkbait

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I’m watching YouTube fitness videos and one was titled “Giulia has a really impressive snatch”.

She’s an Olympic weightlifter.
ballsofsteelandfury

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In a day or two I’ll be receiving the last of my unemployment money from the state, very happy I was able to squeeze out the full benefit considering how much I’ve paid into the damn thing over the years
Doktor Zymm

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The Nobel laureates announcing the Dodgers Padres game just said that these same 2 teams will open next season with a game in Korea.

“That’s South Korea, right?”

No motherfucker they’re playing in Pyongyang and the losers have to stay!

Jesus Christ don’t they require at least a functional brain stem to get a job?

Guess that question was already answered.
yeah right

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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.

Stay busy and safe out there.

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