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Sexy Friday – 20240112

Mr. Ayo

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TGIF! Hope you all survived African American Monday and are ready for the playoff weekend. Make sure you have access to Peacock for tomorrow’s night freezer tilt.

Survival – Personal Edition

Here’s the scenario: You’re engaged and getting ready to be married. The only issue, your relationship with the future in-laws is deteriorating. You need to fix that and make sure the wedding doesn’t have any additional drama it doesn’t need.

  • Have a direct conversation with them. Tell you feel your relationship within them has changed and ask if it’s something you did. Talk about any issue from your standpoint, but don’t blame them for anything. For example, so “I feel this” instead of “you did this”. Listen carefully and be open to criticism.
  • Remain calm, be nice to them, and be patient. By just being overly nice for long enough could work to wear them down. Pretend you’re Ted Lasso.
  • Get others to vouch for you. Ask other family, friends, and neighbors to talk about your positives when those future in-laws visit.
  • Volunteer your services to them. Whatever needs done around their place, offer to assist or do it outright. Offer to drive them to and from the airport. Offer to petsit. Be involved in their life and help wherever you can.
  • Plant a diary where the future in-laws will find it. Make sure its filled with aspirations for your future with their child, your love of them, and critically how much you like your future in-laws and how much you hope they’ll like you too.
  • Find out their favoUrite celebrities. Get a picture of them, sign it to yourself, frame it, and display it for them. Tell them you might be able to pull a few strings and get them a meeting.
  • Pay for the wedding. If you or your family already is, pay off their mortgage or car.  For the poors, take them out to dinner and pick up the tab.
  • Lastly, negotiate a deadline for a grandkid.

Unless you’re an irredeemable piece of shit, this should be enough to keep them on your side until the wedding. After that, well, you already got that ring.

Click here to get to commenting

Survival – Species Edition

Time to put the sexy in Friday!

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!

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yeah right

It’s beginning to look like a trip to Toronto in September. The 12th through the 18th tentatively.

Ball game.

BFIB vs the hometown Jay’s.

Any of our Canadian friends got a game plan?

3
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

I’m in
Plan:
Skip the game and find a place to chill and drink

4
Gumbygirl

This has always been my favorite Tull song. https://youtu.be/FOhD-VGIt_8?si=j6xgG08RfISpMHoU

2
yeah right

That’s a beauty.

A good walking song to start your day.

Last edited 2 years ago by yeah right
1
yeah right

The second episode of Saturday Night Live back in 1976, which I watched while it originally aired, had Paul Simon as the host and he reunited with Art Garfunkel.

Cool.

But it was more like the Saturday Night Special that aired on ABC.

More music that comedy.

This is cool. They’re still finding out what they want to be.

That entire cast of the Not Ready For Prime Time Players were railing lines and pounding drinks on the company dime!

For what?

A Night off.

4
Brick Meathook

I know everything going on in this photo:

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1
Brick Meathook

That’s a main engine (uncovered) that would be installed on a battleship or aircraft carrier. If they had 4 shafts, there would have been 4 identical installations of this. That big gear (the “bull gear”) turns its main shaft.

1
Brick Meathook

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2
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-V7XYKh5RI

2
Brick Meathook

The sock hop scene from American Graffiti (1973) d. George Lucas

This is George Lucas’s only human movie and is also his best film, and it’s great.

It made a mint-load of money, and allowed him the financial freedom to develop Star Wars (1977).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhhW0IN-P9I

3
Gumbygirl

I haven’t seen that movie in years. They never show it on tv.

2
Brick Meathook

Rent it and watch it.

0
Gumbygirl

I’m gonna go to Blockbuster. Oh wait, I can’t, I still have a movie out from 1986 or so. Damn it. That fine has to be pretty hefty by now. Maybe I’ll just go shoplift it from somewhere.

4
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Plus I didn’t think you were that closer to Bend, Oregon, the only place with an open blockbuster in the United States.

2
Brick Meathook

I still have my Blockbuster card.

Rent it from Amazon.

2
Gumbygirl

I still have mine too. Maybe they will come back someday, and we won’t have to get new ones. We’ll be first in line!

1
Brick Meathook

Quit talking and just rent the dang movie.

OR

I could bring over my copy and you and Gumby and myself could watch it together until you heard enough submarine sea stories in a 90 minute period to cause your head to explode.

2
2Pack

It was on over here a couple of weeks ago. I had a good time watching it again.

1
yeah right

They played that movie the last day of school in 8th grade in the auditorium and the school went nuts.

Class of 1979.

1
TheRevanchist

Women beavers tied up with Arizona. 3 seconds left.

0
TheRevanchist

We have OT on the PAC 12 network!

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Lady BFC just asked me if Cristin Milioti is hot like it was in question in the slightest.

0
ballsofsteelandfury

Pics so we can evaluate.

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

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0
ballsofsteelandfury

That’s a better picture, but I think I’m with Lady BFC. It’s questionable.

1
Doktor Zymm

Just going off what’s posted here I would say cute rather than hot, but that’s just me

2
ballsofsteelandfury

I concur

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

You’re both wrong.

1
Mr. Ayo

I’m officially old. She is good looking, but she also looks way too young for me.

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0
Brocky

Having my first “dirty old man moment” was not a milestone i was ready for when it happened

2
ballsofsteelandfury

That is not a flattering picture.

3
BugEyedBoo

How old are you, 106? She’s 38.

6
Mr. Ayo

Day #21

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2
Horatio Cornblower

Just ordered a Fanta shirt. The Coca-Cola company owes Mr. Ayo some royalties or something.

4
Mr. Ayo

For you or the wife?

Or Lowratio?

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Did he say half of a Fanta shirt?

4
Horatio Cornblower

Me. Mrs. Horatio doesn’t like soda and we have to limit Lowratio’s sugar intake or all hell breaks loose.

6
yeah right

Just signed up for the Peecock.

First show?

The very first episode of Saturday Night Live hosted by George Carlin.

Alrighty then!

5
Sharkbait

That’s how they get you

1
Gumbygirl

Not me.

0
King Hippo

The Cherries NEED you and your $6/month!!

1
yeah right

That’s the other reason.

0
WCS

Meanwhile, at Casa Cornblower, Horatio and Lowratio work on the rodent issue…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsBa4CVSgao

6
Horatio Cornblower

Accuracy is about a 10/10 here.

2
Brick Meathook

The 105/110 interchange in Los Angeles.

There’s a glass elevator in the middle of it.

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2
2Pack

Light traffic. Taken during the Covid-19 lock down perhaps?

1
Brick Meathook

Probably, or Sunday morning.

I love this thing. I go through it on the FasTrak lanes sometimes just for fun. It is an engineering work of art and is very efficient.

There’s a train station and an express bus station in there, connected by the glass elevator. The legacy Southern Pacific rail track goes through a tunnel under the 105, then a bridge over the 110, then a grade crossing over Figueroa.

The opening dance sequence for the movie La La Land (2016) was shot on the FasTrak flyover on the left side. Driving over that is one of the best views in L.A.

2
2Pack

The third lady needs help adjusting her seat. I can see that.
Sound sucking up to the in-laws advice for the young uns.
Sum retro sexy for us old farts.

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3
Mr. Ayo

Did you watch Ferrari? And does that brand mean that much to you? And is that meaning meaningful different from the locals?

1
2Pack

I have not but want to check it out, the trailer I’ve seen looks good. Ferrari has high end stores that sell quality stuff, brought my honey a v neck red shirt that is pure boner inducing. Locals are generally proud, especially around Modena. Cops will drive Ferraris taken as payment from tax evaders, that always cracks me up.

2
ballsofsteelandfury

LOVE the retro sexy!

3
Horatio Cornblower

Tyreek Hill is saying that he’s going out Sunday without sleeves because “it’s a mindset.”

You know what isn’t a mindset? Frostbite.

3
Brick Meathook

Also if he takes a hit and his arm cracks off mid-bicep and he doesn’t even feel it.

3
Doktor Zymm

The field is heated and no sleeves doesn’t mean he won’t wear one of those capes on the sideline

1
Horatio Cornblower

Is it wrong that I’m scrolling through the pictures and my first actual thought was “Fuck, I want that Fanta shirt!”?

3
Mr. Ayo

Not at all. You’re definitely not the first.

2
scotchnaut

Nazi at all surprised that you would want one.

1
Horatio Cornblower

Say what you will about the tenets of National Socialism, at least it’s an ethos, albeit one that I have no idea what it has to do with a T-shirt on a comely lass celebrating a highly sugared soda from my bygone youth.

1
King Hippo

I’m not sure it would cover my boobs enough, though

4
2Pack

There were clothing items in the pictures too?

2
Horatio Cornblower

It’s the stuff that (barely) obscures all the good parts.

2
scotchnaut

https://www.espn.com/college-football/story/_/id/39296247/will-rogers-transfer-portal-previous-washington-pledge

“Will Rogers has transferred again? Let’s hope that this time he doesn’t jump on Wiley Post’s plane one more time.”

-F. Nietzsche, philosopher/sports reporter

2
Horatio Cornblower

This is my favorite song by Belly

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mnjPsLkspkg

That said, don’t shoot dogs.

2
scotchnaut

Love this tune by Foghat that served as an instructional song for how fast you should drive when your dogs are hanging out the window, feeling that sweet breeze on their faces.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GcCNcgoyG_0&ab_channel=soccerbabe2545

6
Horatio Cornblower

Mouse update:

I caught the mouse in the kitchen. Had the little bastard in my hands, but he squirmed out because I a) did not want to get bit, (it was a moment of opportunity and I did not have gloves), and b) I really didn’t want to crush a mouse with my bare hands. That’s just psycho shit.

Later on the cat finally got off his lazy ass and cornered the mouse by the fireplace. He sat there crouched, staring intently. The mouse ran around some books, scooted onto the firewood, and eventually got nose-to-nose with the cat before jumping down between the cat’s paws and then scooting off somewhere. Cat never even tried to catch him.

The mouse disappeared and the cat, having completely failed and in fact not even tried to do his job, went over to an old pile of catnip crumbs and got high.

Cats! They’re just like us!

11
Mr. Ayo

You haven’t put the traps out?

0
Brocky

Yeah seriously, the traps work, both only for a few times. They wise up to them

Just bite the bullet and buy some. The cat will likely eat the remains

1
Horatio Cornblower

Nope. And now that we’ve been eye-to-eye I don’t think we’ll be doing that as long as it’s just one stray. He or she brings any friends or family in and it’s going to be jihad.

5
Brocky

When I got the new house into the country I didn’t realize what a mouse problem we’d have. Every winter one seems to have a bunch of babies and you can hear them scurrying around. Then you start opening cabinets and find pet food in places its not supposed to be, and then one day you open your silverware drawer to find it covered in mouse turds. It’s disgusting. Get it taken care of

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3
Horatio Cornblower

We’ve been through those cycles. That’s when the traps come out and you buy locking plastic bins for the pet food. You have an older house in the country, you have mice. Circle of life.

2
BugEyedBoo

We’ve got a couple of live traps. They look like a hamster tunnel. We throw some bird seed in there. They work.

My wife is quick enough to catch them live. I’m quick enough to step on them as they run by. Which doesn’t exactly cheer me up, but I don’t want mice in the house.

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0
2Pack

Sum wild kingdom shit right there folks.

2
Doktor Zymm

The spray rodent repellent worked well for me

1
King Hippo

Sorry I was right about BOW OUT!!!, Ayo. With DeBoer there, I probably legitimately WILL like Alabama now.

Thanks for still including good shoulder pics this week. We appreciate your laboUrs, Bastard Man.

2
Mr. Ayo

I’m very much a fair weather fan of the Huskies, so this only means I can ignore them again. My only affinity for them is due to proximity. Also, I have a full time job in New England now.

2
Horatio Cornblower

Lumberjack in Millinocket, ME?

1
King Hippo

shhhh, be nice, his twin will hook some imaginary bruthas up with luxury suite passes. WITH HOOKERS

2
Doktor Zymm

The snowstorm here turned out to be a wash, it just rained all day. Temps are dropping now so might snow overnight and maybe some black ice on unsalted roads. I was looking forward to being all cozy inside while it snowed outside and this wasn’t it. Although on the plus side my friend was able to drop by since the roads were fine all day

0
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Crazy snow and wind here.

1
Doktor Zymm

Was windy earlier but seems to have calmed down

0
scotchnaut

I’ll come good here after so many years-9,676 of those maniacs were OK in my book.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLz-Q-hjnKA&ab_channel=A-MUSIC

2
Brocky

It was blizzard like conditions on the way to work this morning, and mid March conditions on the way home

1
Doktor Zymm

I haven’t tried the malort sno cones
https://chicagoist.com/2013/07/30/malort_tastes_almost_decent_in_snow.php

1
litre_cola

I found the malort cocktail in a can that I texted you a while back too.

2
Doktor Zymm

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1
Mr. Ayo

WTF

1
Doktor Zymm

This one is even more wtf
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4
Mr. Ayo

JFC

3
WCS

“WCS, do you ever miss booze?”
“Not when this exists.”

5
Horatio Cornblower

Dear the sweet baby Jesus.

3
ArmedandHammered

The ice numbs the tongue and the tastebuds go into hibernation.

2
Sharkbait

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Ok so the after taste sucks ass. It’s stupid bitter and tastes like tree roots.

2
Mr. Ayo

Attaboy. Two more shots and you’ll be a proper convert.

3
litre_cola

I had 1 a night at a place called Pippin’s Tavern. The bartender at another place told me that is where all service industry people go after work. I was there every night!

3
Brocky

I don’t know when this vile drink came into my life, I think it all just manifests into existence of bears fans

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4
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

It gives you tendonitis?

0
ArmedandHammered

And a bad taste in shirts, unless the picture was of Redshirt.

2
litre_cola

Not all of us can have a full wardrobe of Warhammer shirts.

4
Brocky

That red tiger shirt was a gift thank you very much

Love that thing, I won’t hear it slandered

6
Brocky

Also I’m wearing a Deadpool tacos shirt underneath it

2
Gumbygirl

It’s Brocky’s, he loves the red and black.

1
Brocky

Nah, that was years of sports, manual labor, and driving a stick shift

1
Horatio Cornblower

That would explain the draft choices.

1
Brocky

My draft choices were good, I was number 4 in points, but number 2 in points against

1
Horatio Cornblower

I was referring to the Bears.

1
Brocky

………

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3
Doktor Zymm

Yup, that’s an excellent description

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

…tastes like tree roots.

Excellent synergy with Gumbygirl’s request of Feed the Tree below.

2
King Hippo

There are even limits to MY self-hatred. FFS

0
Sharkbait

I’m second guessing the malort. Anything dubbed the worst liquor ever gives me pause

2
Mr. Ayo

Do it!

It can’t possibly be that bad.

2
Mr. Ayo

And if it is, you’ll have a great story to share with us

2
Brick Meathook

Malort review from the Bum Wine website:

This foul Sweedish liquor seems to be indigenous to Chicago.  The word “Malört” means wormwood in Sweedish.  The tag line on the label says it all, “Most first-time drinkers of Jeppson Malort reject our liquor.  Its strong, sharp taste is not for everyone.  Our liquor is rugged and unrelenting (even brutal) to the palate.  During almost 60 years of American distribution, we found only 1 out of 49 men will drink Jeppson Malort.  During the lifetime of our founder, Carl Jeppson was apt to say, ‘My Malort is produced for that unique group of drinkers who disdain light flavor or neutral spirits.’  It is not possible to forget our two-fisted liquor.  The taste just lingers and lasts – seemingly forever. The first shot is hard to swallow! PERSERVERE [sic].  Make it past two ‘shock-glasses’ and with the third you could be ours…forever.”  People write in to us claiming that the flavor is a mixture of tussin, nail polish remover, gasoline, bug spray, varnish remover, grapefruit rinds, corn syrupand metal with a hint of herbs.  The taste powerfully lingers for at least ten minutes.  While it’s certainly worthy of mention as “quirky, disgusting booze,” at $15-$20 a fifth, it’s definitely not the drink of choice for Chicago bums.  It’s mostly bottom-shelf pints of liquor instead of that wormwood-infused flower of the Jeppson company.

2
Horatio Cornblower

Sounds like it would go great paired with a Big Turk.

5
Doktor Zymm

It’s really not that bad, just very bitter. And the taste lingers so if you don’t like bitter it haunts you for a while

3
Sharkbait

That’s accurate.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

What kind of bitter? Like British Bitter Beer bitter like Guinness bitter or like another kind of bitter?

0
Doktor Zymm

More like campari bitter

2
Sharkbait

But worse.

3
Doktor Zymm

Yeah, it makes campari seem nuanced

2
litre_cola

I found it herbacioUs bitter.

1
Brick Meathook

Well I just sent Peacock my $5.99 so I can watch the freezer game and yeah I’m going to cancel it right after that.

Sometimes these places will give you a discount rate to keep you when you quit. I routinely do this with newspaper subscriptions. The Wall Street Journal has an “introductory rate” of $4/month for 12 months, then it goes up to $29.99/month. At 12 months I cancel it. They immediately offer another year at $4/month. I’ve done this continuously for several years.

3
Mr. Ayo

I do the same with NYT. But mostly for the crossword access.

0
Brick Meathook

The crossword is the only reason I subscribe to the NYT

2
Horatio Cornblower

I just take The NY Times to the self-check out and keep walking.

3
scotchnaut

“You keep on subscribing to my paper at a discount? Good. Good.”

-Rupert Murdoch, initial inspiration for the phrase, “Let The Hate Flow Through You”

2
ArmedandHammered

I have it as part of my Amazon Prime account so we could watch Tulsa King. I am going to try and watch but there is so much I need to do around the house.

1
Doktor Zymm

I’m pretty sure they’ll still show it on NFL+. If they don’t, I’ll find a stream

0
Sharkbait

Proof. This exists in Cambridge.

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3
Brick Meathook

I’ve been to that bar! (didn’t have Malort though)

2
litre_cola

I 100 percent need a bottle of that stuff for my bar.

3
Doktor Zymm

I’m in Chicago right now, want me to pick you up a bottle?

2
litre_cola

Yes please!

3
Doktor Zymm

I’ll pick some up tomorrow!

0
litre_cola

Thank you! Will reciprocate as is custom.

1
Gumbygirl

This song makes me happy
https://youtu.be/RQJjUbMrt8w?si=YHJOHBO2w24zpx9b

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m partial to this one myself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBi676v4Gs4

3
King Hippo

Tanya is a genius. And fetching, obviously.

and if you bore him, you;re gonna looooooose your soooooouuullll

4
Sharkbait

Ok Chicago and Chicago adjacent people. The bar I’m at has malort. What do I order to taste this “legendary” spirit?

1
ballsofsteelandfury

Um, Malort?

I’m pretty sure it only comes in shot form.

1
Sharkbait

Recommended chaser? I feel like this needs to happen

0
ballsofsteelandfury

Drano?

1
Doktor Zymm

Pickleback is not a horrible idea, the taste lingers a bit with almost every chaser

2
yeah right

You’re going to need a very large beer.

4
scotchnaut

Bullitt chase scene on AMC right now! Can you hear the tires squealing?

0
scotchnaut

That’s the only dialogue, btw…

0
scotchnaut

Jaqueline Bissett is far too beautiful to be in this movie.

0
Horatio Cornblower

I just saw the Archer episode where they redid that.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If it weren’t for all the butts and boobies, today wouldn’t feel like a Friday at all. Thank you to Mr. Ayo for saving the day!

2
Mr. Ayo

I’d shake your hand, but you kind of ruined that yesterday.

Anyway, this is my 69th post.

4
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[can’t remember what he did fifteen minutes ago, let alone 24 hours]

1
Mr. Ayo

I apologize in advance, but you asked for it.

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1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ah yes, I suppose I did steal a bit of Sexy Friday’s thunder with that photographic equivalent of a bodice-ripper.

2
scotchnaut

College highlights of Sidney Moncrief-come for one of the first instances of the Euro-Step (1979) and stay for the breakaway Tomahawk dunks. Loved that guy as a kid-could have had an even more impressive pro career if he didn’t have a degenerative knee condition.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sos-vmwW36E&ab_channel=WARMACHINE2013

0
Gumbygirl

I refuse to pay for Peacock. I won’t watch that game. Hopefully there will be enough refuseniks that the Shield realizes the error of their ways and never pulls this shit again. I realize this is a ridiculous stance, and they don”t give a fuck whether I watch or not, but I have PRINCIPLES!! ( If it were the Steelers game, I would not have these principles, lol)

2
Mr. Ayo

I get Peacock for free because I have Xfinity, so I don’t have these decisions.

HOWEVAH, Peacock also has EPL streaming rights, so I’d still pay for it.

REGARDLESS, I hope you’re right that numbers stink so bad that they have no choice.

UNFORTUNATELY, Peacock paid $110MM for one playoff game. The Shield won’t forget that number.

1
ballsofsteelandfury

Free Peacock is bullshit. Nothing is on there.

There’s a special offer right now of a whole year for $30. I jumped on it so I could watch the Olympics. All events will be aired on there.

I’ll cancel in September.

0
scotchnaut

tWBS and Green Day covered the whole September thing already.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NU9JoFKlaZ0&ab_channel=GreenDay

2
Horatio Cornblower

Goddammit.

1
litre_cola

It’s 2024 and I should damn well be able to get Mexican futbol to my teevee legally. Having to Crack out the lapper with Hantavirus is not a good option anymore.

1
Brocky

Spoiler

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3
2Pack

Nice

1
scotchnaut

A.J. Brown didn’t practice again and has apparently scrubbed all references to the Eagles on his socials. What’s going down in Alphabet Philly Town?

1
litre_cola

Nothing. They will get torched by Evans and Godwin as the secondary is Slay and 3 dudes the bus picked up at the home depot.

2
Horatio Cornblower

Does Siriani survive this debacle?

0
scotchnaut

Hey, Girl Wearing The Helmet, no need to be so shy!

2
Mr. Ayo

Put her in the driver’s seat and enjoy!

1
ballsofsteelandfury

I’ve always loved Fanta

2
scotchnaut

-The Third Reich

2
Gumbygirl

They were Nazis? I fucking hate Nazis.

1
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