Well, not ever, just today.
To The Game!
Chargers/Chiefs:
-I’ve the notion that these teams may very well meet up in the postseason, given the momentum that Los Angeles has. Their play has improved on a near weekly basis. That asshole Harbaugh sure can coach, gotta give him that.
-Are they the most dangerous 8-4 team in the league? I’m going to go out on a limb and say yes. (they’re the only 8-4 team, btw) They’re 5-1 in their last six tilts and three of their losses were by one score. The other loss was by 10 points to the Steelers back in September when the team was still finding its footing.
-They’ve not allowed even 200 points yet (188). The Chiefs D that everyone raves about (including me) has given up 235 to this point.
-Kansas City has won six straight against these guys however.
-Who names their kid Ladd? Anyhoo, he’s sure making a name for himself lately, garnering target numbers of 7, 9, 6 and 12 in four of his last five games. Among rookies McConkey is second only to Nabers in yards receiving.
-Are you feeling a flagkakke coming on this evening that will eventually benefit the Chiefs? Me too.
Enjoy.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Dm2TSMerGPQ
Beans to you if you don’t like it, I love this song right now. They’re both so damned good-looking. The capitalization is lacking but, hell, I enjoy it.
While my wife and her mother discuss finances, I’ll just poke my head into the clubhouse and…ah yes. I see we’re still firmly entrenched in the darkest timeline. I didn’t realize that complete hopelessness could simultaneously feel so comforting; like a warm blanket made out of live cockroaches.
Would cockroaches really be warm? They’re cold blooded
Maybe they’re radioactive or something.
I mean it is the darkest timeline; regular cockroaches simply would not do.
Just imagine the room getting warmer in the middle of the night and it’s just the hot cockroaches.
HOT BUG GO BRRRRRR
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LewYq40Svw&list=RDBuQG6_evFc8&index=2
https://youtu.be/UIh3Z4NOprw
I might actually go see a movie in a theater for the first time since…..I think the last one was The Imitation Game in 2014
I think that Tim “The Toolman” Taylor did another Santa movie? Maybe go twice.
I’m in. DFO Movie Date Day?
Doink (Heel) Titantron
The old Gods wanted to screw the Dolphins over and the NFL said not today. Capitalism has officially defeated the old Gods!
Fuck you Doink.
You’re my least favorite deity.
What a great ending! Thanks to all of you for rooting for the right team to win. Go Chefs!
Revanchist is Otto in disguise.
Those who know, know.
Needs more graphs.
You have to be kidding me!
DOINK FOR THE WIN!
I was just going to type the same thing.
You have got to be kidding me
DAMN DESTINY DOINK
Even SHA’NKLOR enjoys Chargering.
Bad doink. Booooooo!
Et tu, DOINK!?
Charger’s the Error Tour will never conclude
Hate it and love it.
deus ex machina, the team
LIKE I SAID
Wait a minute, what happened to Make America kick again? Is he hurt because of wife/property not taking sufficient care of him?
He’s either hurt or was named an Ambassador by Trump.
tore his MENiscus
Exactly why we need to end no fault divorce!
Kickers move around a lot, they must be good at finding short term rentals
They just move in with the holders.
After the package of Mahomes getting hit, Tua has been put in concussion protocol
Here comes the fuck you
Miami needs LA to lose. KC is missing the field goal
Bend over and grab your ankles. The Chiefs are coming in hot.
Milk man has made this a real team.
That Kicking Net nearly ended a dynasty.
gifting the chiefs with a bad kickoff and putting it on the 40 yard line with less than 5 minutes left?
yep, it was in the script for sure
Yeah, but at least BLEERGH wasn’t involved here. Clippers Clipped themselves.
That should count against Dicker the Kicker in fantasy
Of course, Chad Johnson would be involved with the Maddencast. If he put the same effort in being cool and popular into practicing and improving, he might’ve won one or two of those Bengals playoff games.
Did he change his name back?
Like, before COVID.
He it did to get married, who he promptly headbutted because he is a child in the body of a grown man and had a temper tantrum.
Ochocinco is now his middle name.
Wow, that is even more messed up than I would have guessed
That’s the madness of Ocho. How good he was: that was him slacking off and not putting in the effort.
He gave mad respect to the CFL. Did nae know they were that good.
Neither did Manziel. They’re all big men until they show up and realize it’s the nfl but 3 inches shorter across the board.
Hey, I haven’t watched any football today but felt compelled to stop by and remind myself and everyone that the Bears were 4-2 going into their bye week. THIS season.
Last place schedule and backloaded division games
It’s Alive, It’s Alive
LEAVE MY CITY, WILL YOU?!
How did I even win one fantasy matchup this year?
We discussed this in person. You and GTD had auto draft and you lost
Gonna steal Horatio’s bit and do a quick in season mock draft.
One single fast food item.
I’ll start with KFC original recipe chicken thigh.
Your turn.
A&W Papa burger, no pickles.
Double Arby’s roast beast with cheese sauce and three pepper sauce.
jimmy johns #5 vito
(a private equity firm just recently bought them out, so enjoy it while it lasts)
(oh wait, that was jersey mikes, phew im safe)
Shamrock Shake
Chicken FIL A spicy
Taj chimes in with a Robertos carne asada burrito.
No guac.
Sorry, no goddamn guac.
No goddamn guac!
You’re are my very favorite and everybody should damn well know.
Breakfast Baconater from Wendy’s. My God that thing is so delicious
oh I forgot about breakfast items!
Popeyes’s Spicy Chicken Sandwich
Popeyes chicken sandwich, extra pickles
McRib
Waffle House hash browns scattered, smothered, and covered.
With a side of fistfight?
Meth chaser in the bathroom!
Dick’s Deluxe
Ain’t nothing like a big ol bag o’ Dick’s
IMHO, Dick’s is what McDonald’s probably tasted like before Ray Kroc enshittified it.
I can see that. “The Founder” practically showed everyone how to do it. It just depends on if you’re content being modestly successful versus streamlining for greater profits.
In n out. Double double, animal style. I win
Solid solid choice.
As a tourist I found in n out worse than 5 guys
Burger Baron is the way. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=WMl_zwsj26k
Clearly you were temporarily insane
As a tourist I can only imagine Litre dressed in pastels with a ninja turtles Fanny pack, complaining about the ketchup on his in and out hamburger.
Easy Johnny Rye-a-lot.
Yes. The site actually told me to cool down. I just woke up from a midday rye nap and went ham on unnecessary comments.
Sure, their fries aren’t great. And isn’t a 5 guys burger 4x the cost of in n out. The only memorable thing about 5 guys for me was the peanuts. But despite the seemingly adamant post I really don’t care about ranks and just enjoy what i enjoy and want everyone else to too
I like five guys for the bacon and sauteed mushrooms for free and it’s a tasty burger.
I’m changing mine. Does a dirty water hot dog count as fast food?
Script is in. Spanoi td, then the Chefs get 2 rouges
You’ll get nothing and like it!
Chris Jones is very underated
He’s adequately rated. Where have you been?
What is the sexiest color of fishnet?
Black?
I’m going black.
Easy twbs
Wouldn’t be the first time.
Red if with matching bra. Thank you for your service.
Glow in the dark white
Kinky.
Point of Order and Parliamentary Procedure: Wouldn’t fishnets be considered a form of pants and showing support for same would be in violation of DFO Bylaws?
Only rarely, fishnet comes in many forms and even when in pantyhose form, the most similar to pants, they don’t really fulfill most of the functions of pants, e.g. warmth or concealing anything
Not thigh highs with a garter belt. If they were pantyhose [ ICK] then yes, but nobody has worn those in a million years. Oh God, pantyhose. Control top pantyhose. Why???
.
THIS
https://youtu.be/7_GNz8IaUiM?t=147
Although fishnet pantyhose was great for doing fishnet arms, just rip out the crotch to put your head through then the waistband works like the band on a sports bra
So you can roll them off and shove them in someone’s mouth. Not me, but someone wants that.
Black or red. Neon can be rocking if you’ve got a tan.
Depends on skin tone. Black or white. Go for contrast. All other colours are superfluous.
The only real conversation I’ve ever had about fishnets was about fifteen years ago when a friend really wanted to do roller derby. I told her to really think about her fishnet budget and she realized it just wasn’t feasible. That and the bad knees…
Night all, gonna go read and listen to some Cream and Led Zepp.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZnHavrD4vQ&list=PLFi9V6EFsFIlS2HnR8zKyv9rvZPFqameU&index=7
In a white room, with black curtains?
Near the station?
Thanks to Ayo for the reminder. There are some good ‘uns this year!
https://boobychristmas.com/
https://booty-christmas.com/
That pretty good!
I like it, but December 3 looks way too young…
i am the one and only person under the age of 45 that has NEVER EVER touched a madden game
I’m guessing there’s a sizeable amount in North Korea, Burkina Faso, and Bhutan.
That’s why I subscribe to Christopher Titus’ way of dealing with America’s enemies:
How is that even possible?
Nah, I bought one once because it came with a year of free Sunday Ticket but never played it. Only sports video game I ever got into was Virtua Tennis
Turbo Grafx had a great golf game. That’s assuming golf is a sport.
Whelp, we’ve seen (unfortunately) Paintn’ Manning and Debatin’ Manning.
Is Masterbatin’ Manning next? Only time will tell.
Baggin’ Manning
Taint’n Manning
Fellatin’ Manning.
(EDIT) Corporate Fellatin’ Manning
Prognosticatin’ Manning.
If I had edit power, I would change this to “Corporate Fellatin’ Manning”
Much more accurate.
Aw, thanks, WCS…
That won’t be on network TV at least
Shit canning Manning.
Just catching up. Bahahahaha Bama. Forks Up ASU!!!!
occasionally the hellscape gets evened out a tad. a healthcare ceo gets blasted. everybody quits around assad all at once…
and then, we felt a disturbance, as if a million people yelled PAAAWWWWLLLLL all at once, and then were silenced
Is this KC Chiefs the worst team that’s going to win the Superb Owl?
we were so close to a sex cannon bears super bowl cock ring
You don’t remember Trent Dilfer?
Seconded
That defense was legendary and Jamal Lewis was a stud.
Unfortunately, I can’t forget him. He’s
“coaching” my Blazers.
New content. That’s my Blazers. It’s locked in.
No. Top 15, yes. Argument for Top 10. But there are worse ones.
(rechecks Grimoire)
Dang it, Eye of Newt was the Home Team QB. A Dragon’s Claw was the Away Team QB.
Sorry, Chargers.
Why do they want to check if I am human, most days even I’m not really sure.
Name a week when Herbert isn’t hurt? The West Coast Tua.
Minus the gray matter leaking from his ears.
Chiefs fans bitching about not getting a favorable call is just, chef’s kiss man.
I wouldn’t be so upset, but D-Hop go molested like he was a 12 year old on Epstein Island.
Doesn’t make the ball any more catchable tho
And now Herbert is ded so they luck out again
I love that Corona has not changed their Xmas ad since the first TV was invented.
Why fuck with a classic?
We have had this exact same conversation since I started hanging out here. It probably started way before that. I’m willing to bet since KSK. It’s a metaclassic!
I hate everything and everyone.
She ain’t gonna shit right for a week.
OK, tough, but fair non-discriminatory hate. I respect that.
Even pizza?
Hippos pizza, yeah
It’s both an abomination and proof that pizza is for everyone
Fulham fan?
I am woefully behind on my Scotch advent calendar, nevertheless I think this is a wine night. I’ll have a Scotch catchup night, maybe Thursday
Never let Scotchy get behind you. You will end up in a Sudbury landfill
I think you name your kid Ladd if you are VERY lazy and can’t even be bothered to remember your kid’s names. Actually surprised more football coaches don’t have sons named Ladd and daughters named Girly
1000% chance he goes by Laddie.
I have a friend whose last name was (and still is, I guess) Ladd. He had the opportunity to be known as Thad Ladd but didn’t seize it; huge mistake in my book.
The unisex option of ‘Champ’
My entire bench of 11 players in Math Hard scored 3.1 points.
Because they’re all playing tomorrow, right?
Tuesday
It’s still good! It’s still good!
Wednesday night I started pissing blood. S results ame as Thursday, all day. We wasn’t nt to my PCP on Friday and he said UTI.
Saturday morning I wasn’t feeling right, and by Sarlturday evening I wasn’ peeing. Drips and drabs results and constant agony. Best in mind I’m following UTI instructions and drinking lots of water. So Kathy and I go the ER. I get a catheter, big fun, while test results happen. On-call doctor (the only one they have) says we need to check in and look at deeper tests. In the meantime, that catheter gets blocked by clots in the bladder. That fuckin’ hurt!
So doctor said we need a fancy catheter that flushes out the clots. The nurses come in and they try to install this. I’m already in pain from the old catheter not working. They cannot get it to work! There is a clot that’s too big, and can’t be pulled out of the catheter. Two nurses and two doctors are doing the old monkeys fucking thing, on my dick! I have literally never felt anything this Kathy can’t bear to watch and I am writhing in agony. So the doctor says, “clot removal surgery at 11:30. This was 6 AM and I am in serious pain.
The monkey fuckers put a smaller cath in there too to theoretically drain some piss off my bladder. It doesn’t, it just drips blood, everywhere. Now I’m in pain and dripping blood everywhere. I can’t find anywhere to rest, except the bathroom. Again, the bladder is overfull, but can’t be emptied. I am in constant pain at this point.
Finally, I get the surgery. Doctor said it normally takes about twenty minutes, but mine took two hours. He said they were huge ones in there. Grapefruit, baseballs, shit like that. Enlarged prostate bled, and clots blocked my urethra. Anyway, when I wake up it still hurts because it’s still full of blood and water. It’s actually getting better and the cath should be removed by Friday.
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
Uh, yes, odds are those words were spoken.
Oh, and pretty much everybody in the hospital got to see my peepee!
See? Silver lining right there!
Dang dude! Get better! Ask for lots of opiates, because you deserve ’em. Get the intravenous ones.
He deserves all the opiates.
ALL THE OPIATES!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Speaking as an ALS Caretaker, all those screaming are babies. Hang in there. Heal up.
Nightmare fuel. Be well boo.
Well that’s horrific. Glad the worst is over and hope they at least give you some of the good drugs
I have sponge kidneys so I get stuff like this every other years with kidney stones, my favorite as getting a ureter stent removed by having a team take a claw game device down the peehole and say relax your bladder sphincter to phish it out with a delightful ripcord feeling at end
Ouch. I think my brother gets that done.
Also, wtf kind of UTI has you pissing blood? I’ve had plenty of UTIs with a couple leading to kidney infections and I never pissed blood. I think your PCP should have been far more concerned
I was not stoned enough to read this and I am now afraid to go to sleep. the dreams, by Morrigan, the dreams
Sorry that happened BugEyed, but after ruminating on it for a bit after several bong hits and as long as it is not happening to me, it is horrifyingly hilarious. And yes, I would expect for you to laugh at my pain if I had a similar experience.
To get more laughs, I’ll tell you that the two stooges messing with my junk had me wondering if I was going to leave the hospital with it.
at least you didn’t pop a boner, right? right?
Actually I would have already died of embarrassment that anybody other than my wife had seen my tallywhacker. And begging for as much pain medication as I could get. I hope you get better soon man.
I spent six weeks in the hospital with a stroke with pulmonary embolism chaser. That broke me of hospital modesty.
Man, given how agonizing it was to have a urethral swab one time, I can’t even begin to imagine how painful this was. If I’m ever in possession of a dark secret that I need to tell someone without worrying that it can be tortured out of them, I FOUND MY GUY.
If you found a way to induce kidney stones, you could name your price as a torturer.
Veteran if six if those bastards. Three without painkillers, and most definitely when I was still drinking. Honestly, the booze did help.
I never knew pain could make one vomit until it happened to me.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand now I’m afraid to go to the bathroom.
Get well soon, you poor bastard. Help yourself to some morphine.
You poor baby. Did they give you any drugs? You need drugs.
I actually turned down oxy this evening. Not that painful now and I don’t want to be constipated.
The Jim Carey The Grinch is playing at Harkins at 6:45.
I’ll get high then take this over MORE KELCE!
God damn it. I think I’m boned in the lowratio
League. I welcome you, Litre, to second tier play next year.
You scum. You piece of filth on the shoe of the vodka league. You get scraped off and then the shoe gets thrown out with the kitchen trash.
I’m already in the trash. It’s a good source of fibre.
aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
EDIT: This was meant for BugEyedBoo’s plight
ooooooooooooooooooooopppppppppppppppppppppsssssssssssssssssssss
Fuck everything
Alabama went from the Playoff to the ReliaQuest Bowl. HA!
How about the Relegated to Division II Bowl?
That’s me