It’s the fantasy playoffs! Does one dare start a Baker that hasn’t thrown for 200 yards in four straight games? Is this the night he gets out of his funk? You may have reason to insert him (more below) but I don’t know what your options are. I’m on board with Grossi and Perna-I’ve said it previously, I can’t recall a more entertaining football season in the last decade than this very one.
Flotsam and Jetsam:
-Colts practice-squadder P. Rivers is in ‘wait and see’ mode at the moment. He’s completely accustomed to that but rather than staring between his wife’s legs in the delivery room to ascertain the sex of the next kid on the assembly line, he’ll be looking for the go-ahead to head under center. Starting at 44 might be his crowning achievement.
-Commies QB Daniels is back on the sidelines again with elbow troubles. For the love of bologna salad, don’t let him see the field again this year.
-I like this ESPN headline whereby one word does some quality multitasking-“Texans Minority Owner Javier Loya Suspended and Fined 500K”. Btw, when you have all kinds of money you can get 1st Degree Sexual Assault pled down to-get this-“Harassment With Intent To Annoy”. The latter charge is a dead-on description of me trying to get my wife to change the channel.
To The Game!
Falcons/Bucs:
-I’m told that both squadoos are breaking out some old unis and that one of them will be creamsicle-like. Someone call me wrong in the comments but I’ve never heard a single soul say, “Remember those old Falcons jerseys? I miss them.” So I don’t know what the hell they’ll be trotting out.
-Back at the beginning of this season (oh so long ago…) I figured both these teams would be around 8-5 but ATL is 1-7 the last two months and Tampa is 1-4 lately.
-The Bucs have lifted wr’s Evans and McMillan off IR and Wirfs is ready to go as well. That Atlanta secondary has been more generous than not but there must be rust on those wheels.
-Tampa has had a quietly good draft in that Emeka and Tez have contributed as well as Edge Roberts and cb’s Parrish and Morrison.
-Speaking of, the Falcons went D with 4 of their 5 picks and A), it was badly needed and B), it didn’t make much difference at all.
-Can you say that a dude that has accumulated 1,683 scrimmage yards is underachieving? Those are Bijan’s numbers and a bunch of folks that follow the team feel that the OC doesn’t really understand what he has on his hands.
It’s right this way to the comment section.
“This was the worst-kept secret,” one industry source told CBS Sports, echoing the sentiment of several others who said rumors of [Sherrone] Moore’s misconduct with a staff member had been rampant well before the termination became official.
Um…okay…let’s just table that disturbing thought for another time.
In the Lowartio League Kyle Pitts put up 39.5 points.
For the team in 13th place.
Somehow very fitting.
49.4 in Maths Is Hard, and he was starting for me (as I limped into playoffs) as a dreaded TE-flex because I had no choice (our rosters froze last Friday).
Safe to say, I know have at least a chance against DonT.
How’d we miss this?!
The ampersand thought it was acting as a vapour barrier.
Actually they did. Pitts false started on this play and BLEEEEERGH let it slide.
…I am like 90% sure Pitts is on my bench. It’s okay, I didn’t get relegated, and we’re partying on the BQE tonight, the Nocturnes are division champs!
Pitts got 50 points for my opponent in my money league tonight.
Luckily, it was the consolation playoffs, so my give-a-shit is at “comical”.
The bad news?
My fantasy opponent has both kyle Pitts and chase McLaughlin
The good news?
We’re in the worthless espn “consolation bracket ” so those points dont mean jack.
Can’t be mad about the fantasy playoffs if you don’t make the fantasy playoffs!
Just had a 6-point buck in the back yard.
Hunting season ends 12/31 in CT, buddy; stay safe.
He’s off to go run into your car
…or run off with your car. You can’t trust young boys out this late at night.
he does have two does with him. That’s gonna be trouble.
Bambi II: The Pimping Years
“Bitch best have my money, or it’s time for venison.”
I know 4-5 people that would have been over to my house in record time with a crossbow cocked and loaded had I called.
Fucker owes me. I do love venison sausage.
We used to go to this 17th century coaching inn on a loch in Scotland. Everything was as local as possible, fish and game heavy menu. They made the best venison I’ve ever had.
Game is so good when prepared right
I’m gifting venison sausage to one of my work friends this year
Does be4 Hos
I just got home from school. WineWife just filled me in on the fourth quarter. That is either objectively frustrating or hilarious, depending on your betting preferences.
6 carries would’ve made me over $100. I didn’t watch the game, but I can only assume after his one carry for 20 yards on the first drive, White stripped naked grabbed the house mic and explained in graphic detail what he was going to do with the offensive playcaller’s wife, daughter, grandmother and assorted female relatives after the game.
Now this is just conjecture based on the available evidence; I have to review the tape to confirm, but this is simply my working theory.
Settle down, Coach Moore.
I will say this one time. You can call me a Trump voter, you can call me a Republican, you can call me a crossdressing Cabaret Dancer named Losantiville Lynn (long story, contrived coincidence, only a friend) but don’t you ever…ever…call me a Michigan Man!
I will say this one time: it’s okay to be gay. Just embrace it, and be much happier.
Oh, sorry, I thought you were Jesse Watters and/or Pete Hegseth.
Not gay, don’t have the style or attitude to pull it off.
Sorry. Again, I thought I was addressing Watters and/or Hegseth. Apologies.
For the record: I’ve never actually met you, but I’m certain you would be fine if you were.
19 penalties and you win?!
My comment below has aged poorly — whether that is my failure to understand analytics or the Bucs just shitting the bed is the question I am pondering now
WTF, Bucs?
In Creamsicle Tradition, Tampa loses embarrassingly.
They’re going to fuck this up
THAT SECOND PERIOD FOR COLORADO I CALL IT ‘CARRIE’ BECAUSE THE ANNOUNCER GUY JUST ACCURATELY DESCRIBED IT AS EXPLOSIVE!!!
19 penalties on Atlanta? At what point does someone foul out?
If any individual player gets 10+ penalties his contract is automatically transferred to the Raiders
Pretty sure that’s banned by the 8th Amendment, although it’s been a while since I took Constitutional Law.
Not that there is such a thing any more.
I’d think being a Bengals player is a violation of the 8th and 14th amendment. Being a Bengals fan should violate some parts of the Geneva Convention and the Magna Carta.
It simply won’t happen because Mike Brown won’t pay their bus fare from the train station to the stadium. That’s TWO transfers for fuck’s sake.
Time to see if the Falcons avenge me for Tampa Bay forgetting Rachaad White exists.
Also, damn this uniform match up is beautiful.
I do like the red helmets.
That’ll teach you to ignore White after a 20-yard run!
It’s esthetically gorgeous football.
More importantly than my last post, I took tomorrow off, because I have well over 400 hours of unused vacation time and am tired of the emails telling me I was going to stop accumulating said time.
The weekend starts tonight, with beer, popcorn, and the Colorado Avalanche absolutely waxing the Panthers. 5-1 so far.
I don’t understand how people get to this point. Why don’t you take your vacation days?
I’m in the same boat. I was supposed to be off half day today just to use it up and I ended up staying in the office.
Did the same last week. Was supposed to be off Monday and Tuesday, trial (jury selection anyway) unexpectedly went forward Tuesday. I went in.
Then the case settled anyway and I muttered many bad words.
I humbly volunteer, as tribute, to take your unused vacation days
At five weeks a year the time accumulates faster than I can take it and keep up with the work.
Also, if I leave under good terms I get to cash out 400+ hours. Oddly, my accumulated time is, oh look at that, just over 400 hours.
I guess my job just doesn’t work the same way, never had a problem taking 5 weeks a year at Meta, and I think I already have 5 scheduled for next year. A lot of people on H1Bs take off from Thanksgiving to New Year and go home for the month and a half
I’d love to, but it doesn’t work that way in litigation. The other side, and especially the fucking Court*, marches to the beat of their own drummer, and if you want to stay in you best get to fucking stepping.
*Now, when it comes to judicial vacations, they’ll cancel shit at the last minute and send you a notice citing a sudden conflict* and apologizing for the inconvenience.**
*sudden opening in buddy’s golf foursome
**they do not care one bit
I’m in the same boat. I can cash out up to the limit. My balance is always right under it.
This is good
So I have heard a bunch of times now that going for two late to make your team down 6 instead of 7 is apparently dictated by analytics . . . but does that math change when teams start to lose when doing it — like the Falcons (probably) tonight and the Eagles on Thanksgiving? Sure seems like this would be tied up now with good old extra points. Or is just that analytics do not apply to birds?
Birds don’t exist. Ask Zymm.
Math, like vaccinations, are for libtard queers.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to do my taxes wrong while scratching vigorously at this easily preventable rash that has sprung up all over my body. I’m sure a debilitating fever won’t follow.
Forgot about the Bucs playing today and left Egbuka on the bench.
Will those 8 points come to haunt me in my play-off game against Litre?
Gimme an Egbuka down!
He’s on my bench, and you know that.
Litre is clearly not employing Scotchy’s “kill him with kindness” strategy.
“kindness”???
That’s what he calls his axe.
Do you American folk get the Iphone vanilla ice cream at nauseum? It throws me into a Fozz rage.
It’s on occasionally, but not every-other commercial every single break bad.
Apple is ruining ice cream now? BASTARDS
Debate. Is it…
Day after day I will work and I will play
Or
Day after day I will walk and I will play
Either way the day after today
I will stop, and I will start
Maybe the real debate is the experiences we made working and walking?
Maybe the real debate is the friends we made along the way
Or the real friends were the debates along the way?
I think it’s walk
Just don’t shoot shoot shoot that thing at me!
Gotta add it up
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4i9fttLLfWU
🤣🤪😅 just out of nowhere, I realized Horatio is Racoon With a Meth Pipe, and his profile pic is the Blair Witch.
I tried very hard* but could not find an image from the news story about said raccoon with said meth pipe.
*well, I looked for a few seconds anyway
Aww yeah, guess who’s got a new logo?
Thanks Zymm!
totes forgot it was Thursday and football on today. Also forgot to check and set my FF lineups. So, log in to see that I accidently started Pitts for his one great game this year. Not used to things working out that way for me
So you’re saying… it wasn’t a game time decision
https://share.google/images/frRSKAV5FtPnQMUoh
Nice catch!
The español Amazon crew does halftime bits and dressup. Would guess this is Fitzmagic spoofing, or demanding all your loving*
* including but not limited to hugs and kissin’
Sharp dressed men in la grange
I think Baker’s got a yeast infection
Thought they all had staph infections
So I watched like three episodes of Scrubs, my god what a hot piping plate of shit
So, you’re saying “No Scrubs”?
They don’t get no love from Fozzie.
Hanging out the passenger side of their best friends ride
Emily in Paris better?
In the Math Is Hard league, Hippo is facing DonT in the playoffs, and Hippo is starting two tight ends. Pathetic, you say? Well, one of them is Pitts.
I’d be really annoyed if I was in the playoffs against the one good Pitts game.
This is what I turn to just after getting off work ?! And friggin Mike Evans is active snd on my bench! 🤬
/opens drawer, stares at narcotics
Holaaaa 🥰
In that league if you bank a field goal you get 37.8 pts with a bonus spin. Anything can happen.
“ain’a cold on that bike?”
You snowmobile…
“…well yeah but…”
I care less about this game than Steve Witkoff cares about Ukrainian children.
Pittsball.
They should, um, cover him?
Al and Herbie are the best of the A team announcers. Especially when Al is bored and tipsy.
Counterpoint: Al Michaels blows goats.
After the game, sure. But during the game? Bored and tipsy.
Herbstreit kills Collinsworth, Romo, Brady, Aikman.
That would be a cool headline.
I’d pay to see that. Throw in Joe Buck too.
Variation on a theme:
THESE GUYS, THE BUCCANEER DEFENSE, I CALL THEM THE HABSBURG DYNASTY BECAUSE THEY ARE TRYING TO BOTH FUCK AND KILL COUSINS!
Keep in mind this was painted by someone trying to flatter one of the Habsburgs.
“they’re welcome to reapply.”
We ain’t ever dealing with that twatwaffle again.
-November 3, 2020
— 11/6/24
(opens portal to Football Hell)
Well, I mean, you don’t want him to go to a divisional foe….
Dead around here, no one taking in this riveting tilt tonight? June this would be a delicacy.
I’m watching, but there doesn’t seem to be anything worth commenting about ..
Doesn’t scotchy say talk amongst ourselves?
You would need two blue parkas here today, was – 27 C with the wind. Yesterday was 5 C, welcome to the foothills of the Rockies.
That’s very cold. Might be why I only lasted one winter there.
It’s a steady 5 to 10 here all week. Bit of rain, mind. But you can’t die from being outside.
Or from falling!
-dr. Gene Simmons
.https://bsky.app/profile/democratcats.bsky.social/post/3m7nfepgpec2h
“The fuck is this?! What the fuck?! What did you do?!?”
They either love snow or they despise it. There is no in between with cats.
I’m here, soon I’ll be high as fuck.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=i2spZ-NDfS4&si=bf9yxig4A9JlhdDm
We can talk about the unspoken consequences of Star Trek 4.
We don’t discuss the whale one
George and Gracie or Scotty?
Scotty was the best part.
C’mon, Kirstie Alley wasn’t that big when she played Saavik.
Well this game is liquid puppy shit.
And not in the fun Aristocrats way.
Royal duties, and now rolling into work.
Yinz will regert asking later 🙂
Just realized Raccoon with a Meth Pipe is Horatio, and his avatar is Blair Witch.
I just realized Horatio is Racoon With a Meth Pipe, and his profile pic is the Blair Witch.
I just realized Horatio is Racoon With a Meth Pipe, and his profile pic is the Blair Witch.
also my team name involves Blair Witch
Gotta say, those Creamsicle unis?
I’m eating warmed-over cabbage rolls in my pj’s, my wife is at a Victim Services Xmas Party. We are not the same.
I’m making breakfast for dinner. Potatoes, onions, peppers, cheese, with an egg or two on top. I was really excited about it, until you had to bring up cabbage rolls. Now they are all I can think about!
Had a drunk guy at a Reds game go on for about 20 minutes to his buddies about cabbage roll sandwiches. They’re available somewhere in Cincinnati. Sounded good to me.
Once in awhile we got one in our garden box and the only thing I make with them are cabbage rolls. I must have the sandwich now.
I could see that, maybe in a toasted bun with garlic butter.
Egbuka td (as I am playing him in FF ‘yoffs)
TB -5.5 (Creamsicle)
Baker 3 tds (Breaks out of funk)
I like it! Only hesitation is that they’ll try to force one to Evans, but I think there will be plenty to go around.
Just can’t find an argument for taking the points. Cousins is dun. and the Bucs D can at least slow down the running game. As much as Tampa has struggled lately, they can accidentally win/cover this one.
Just forced one to Evans
God hates both of these teams equally.
Not even close.
2 superbowls compared to 28-3? A non hated fanbase full of transplants?
Buccaneers have it easy
Falcons fans even suffer vitriol for simply being Falcons fans, AS THEY SHOULD.