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Your Not-The-Football-But-Plenty-Of-Other-Stuff Open Thread

scotchnaut

/

,

By “plenty of other stuff” I was referring to “Grandfathered”. I haven’t caught it yet but I’m going to try it for at least 5 minutes so that I can be informingly condescending about it later on. There’s a few baseball games on and a few baseball fans on this site so have at it guys. I look forward to your inspiteful comments. Me, I’m going to watch a cooking show from Australia after I tune in to Julia Child… The rest of you-what’s going on out there?

 

edit by yeah right. There’s this haunted house near where I lived and they flew this disturbing flag.

the W

 

El Segundo CA in the house!

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Bloody Lethal

I’ll leave this here for you Cubs fans.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xBxZGQ1dJk

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Beerguyrob

I look forward to Jay Cutler throwing out a first pitch and killing Patrick Kane.

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laserguru

I’m going to try this edit thing…

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“ALL YOU WANT IS CUNNILINGUS!! CUNNILINGUS ALL THE DAMN TIME!! WHAT IS IT ABOUT ME YOU CAN’T RECIPROCATE??”

http://38.media.tumblr.com/bea21ffa0a8111f355ddb230dd910c30/tumblr_nox2z7Znsg1rapuh3o1_500.gif

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Porky Prime

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You’re going to feel a little pressure.

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Porky Prime

I haven’t been around much, so has anyone talked about Lamar Odom drugging out in a whorehouse? Your move, Sarkisian.

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WCS

Never go full Kardishian.

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Porky Prime

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Martin

Kris Jenner was seen in a nearby bathroom, calmly washing her hands.

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Why Thank You Eddie

It’ll be as if he never existed. Seriously. Have you ever seen his career stats?

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

My reaction to tonight’s Cubs game:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mTfEDvVVwYE

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WCS

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laserguru

Pretty fucking surreal to be at work listening to the Cubs game.
I’m home know and you know what? We Gon Drank.

Bullee dat!

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WCS

Pens off to an 0-3-0 start, people saying they need to fire Mike Johnston. Those people should follow their own advice and jump off the Hot Metal Street Bridge. It’s hockey; there’s 82 games. Chill.

Went to the dentist today, and have kept my 33-year streak of no cavities going. Gradin’ and DRANKIN on the couch with the cats napping nearby. I can’t complain.

Also, ultrafuck the Cardinals. And the Cubs for that matter.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

How many mojitos can I make with seven limes? Tune in to find out!

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Trick question- real mojitos don’t need limes. Or mint. Just sugar and alcohol.

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blaxabbath

You mean Bud Light Lime? That sounds like the prep meeting for making Bud Light Lime.

Bud Light Lime: For when you’re #upforwhateverlime

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

Hey, more presidential debates!

Now where the hell’s the vodka…?

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I watched almost the whole thing while I cooked and ate pork tenderloin. If you’re looking for an alternative to Hillary and don’t like Bernie, then I’m sorry.

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WCS

I was eating a taco salad and managed to get chili in my eye. How’s your evening?

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nomonkeyfun

I think I found another word on the banned list morans, properly spelled. I’ve got a comment below where I referred to the “mor-ns Dizzy and Deaffy Dean.”

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Moonbatting Average

Cardinals Schadenfreude Day! Drink!

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Lothar of the Hill People

I’m trying to figure out what I think about Playboy giving up on boobs.

I’m disappointed, ultimately. In an age of near-ubiquitous internet porn, they’re deciding that getting rid of boobs will allow them to reach a wider audience.

Now what will young, vacuous women aspire to? No longer will “posing for tasteful nudes” be something the sub-average IQ girls will have as a career choice.

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entropy

V—gra Jersey Girl has the dirtiest smile in commercial history. You would need the opposite of ED meds if she gave you that look.

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Lothar of the Hill People

I’ll see your Julia Child and raise you one Hedy Lamarr

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nomonkeyfun

I always rise Hedy Lamar.

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entropy

Hedy Lamarr, hot and a freakin’ genius. I will take two, they are small.

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ThePirateSloth

We’ve been over and over this. It’s not Hedey, it’s Headley.

http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20121223041942/villains/images/c/ce/8013821358_b05e9ce7d0.jpg

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Horatio Cornblower

There it is.

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Bloody Lethal

I was like I hope noone else got to this.

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Spur

The CNN lady who is hosting the preamble is insufferable

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Kungjitsu

Mets fan. 2/10 would not bang.

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Old School Zero

DTZM right now:

http://i.imgur.com/zhIxf.gif

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His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

I like how we are at the point in the college football season when there are games on Tuesday.

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entropy

LET’S GO METS!!!

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nomonkeyfun

We want Utley.

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entropy

Fuck and yes. Put a 100 mph fastball in his goddamn ear.

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nomonkeyfun

Just have him walk the streets of Carona.

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WCS

Cubs win, Street Louis loses. King Hippo has a sad.

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laserguru

Hippo said it best earlier, there is nothing but love for the fans of the various DFO teams it’s just the teams themselves because man is it fucking glorious to knock the Cards out of the playoffs. This gives us in order:

Eliminating the douchebag Giants by virtue of taking the last wild card spot.

Eliminating the Pirates, who I don’t really mind but they are a division rival.

Finally eliminating the Cubs #1 most hated rival and the “Doing-it-the-right-way” annoyance that is the Cardinals.

We could call it a season here and it would be a tremendous success but if the Cubs want to keep on winning? That’s cool too.

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sunrisesunrise

And then there is this:
https://twitter.com/bosoxholic/status/654111500529827842

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ThePirateSloth

Imma pray for Chicago to not burn down in the next hour.

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laserguru

CUBBBBIIIEEEESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!

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entropy

It’s gonna get savage in here if it goes Mets/Cubs for the NLCS, isn’t it?

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Old School Zero

GO CUBS GO!

For the Chicago Metro area, a warning: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lp3kcHchD1Y

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entropy

Right the collective puckering of every Cubs fan’s asshole could well collapse on itself and create a singularity that could swallow the world.

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laserguru

Oh god, oh shit oh god oh fuck oh shit oh god.

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Grandfathered over Muppets? Heresey!

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ThePirateSloth

Also topical: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ws70oI3yMBc

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entropy

Considering the Mets have a decent chance of advancing, I am not happy with how fired up the small bears are getting right now.

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ThePirateSloth

I’m calling it now: Cards fans will say the Cubs players are using PEDs

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Nah. Except maybe Arrieta.

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nomonkeyfun

Da faq. My comment awaiting moderation. I didn’t even use the V or C word, and I’m not talking about female anatomy.

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nomonkeyfun

We all know the Cardinals would never have a steroid using formerOakland first baseman on their roster, because Cardinal way. Only racists like Country Slaughter, or morons like Dizzy and Daffy Dean. Are acceptable for the Redbirds.
And don’t forget Ozzie Smith, I promise you he had jumping beans in his shoes.

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WCS

Matt Jackson is secretly Skynet. There’s no other way to explain this. Tonight’s was one of the most “competitive” games he’s been on, both opponents were more than fine. Actually, one any other night, this probably would have been a very good game. Instead, Jackson is up $19,000+ over second place going into Final Jeopardy.

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scotchnaut

Cujo 5: The Urinefiring

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Kungjitsu

That’s why you gotta be careful fucking dirty bitches.

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scotchnaut

MLB and its uniform policy does the best job of all the major leagues in trying to hide the fact that some of their best athletes are fairly obese.

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entropy

Calling Jim Belushi a celebrity is going a little far, isn’t it? I mean, no one says Frank Stallone or Don Swayze are celebrities.

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nomonkeyfun

But, but, but Jim Belushi was “The Principal”.

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Horatio Cornblower

Frank Stallone says that Frank Stallone is a celebrity all the damn time.

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scotchnaut

Does anyone do grilled Caesar salad?

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WCS

I’d rather starve than eat something with Caesar dressing on it.

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scotchnaut

This comment needs ‘splaining.

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The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Fairly self-explanatory. The words “creamy” and “anchovy” should never be in the same book, let alone the same sentence.

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nomonkeyfun

No, but only because I don’t believe in cooking lettuce. I love any dish with unusual raw items. Caesar dressing, steak tartare, clams on the half shell, raw week old chicken. Well maybe not the last.

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Mother Puncher

Are we going to get in trouble for posting .gifs too?

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scotchnaut

God, I hope so.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This part of the season always overloads our DVR. Last night there was such a bottleneck that I had to watch the football game in standard definition. STANDARD! It was so pixelated it made Japanese pornography look like it was filmed through the Hubble telescope.

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Kungjitsu

If I knew what hentai was, I’d think it was funny that the Japanese pixelate it too, but I don’t know what hentai is. [dumps internet history]

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scotchnaut

Any baseball fan have an objective take on the Blue Jays/Rangers thingy?

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blaxabbath

Baseball? I think that’s the sport where the Dbacks had back to back .500 seasons, overhauled the front office and the roster, then finished 4 games under .500 this year.

The NFL salary cap needs to be higher for the revenue this league has. However, I appreciate what is does for competition in the league. Doubt I’ll ever go back to baseball.

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scotchnaut

Garlic butter-covered snails? Yes sir!

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SonOfSpam

Weird. In the picture those snails look like chickens. But then, I’m not a foodie.

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scotchnaut

Glue was not made for sniffing-those are snails, fella.

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