Tonight is the 45th anniversary of the first ever Monday Nighter! We’re gonna be treated to so many wonderful memories-mamember the time that Cosell called Alvin Garrett “a little monkey” and then denied it? How about the time that the self-absorbed Joe Theismann decided that everyone should see his tibia? My best csb memory of MNF involved me and my fellow staff guys trying to close the dining room that I bar-tended early so that we could get over to a bar called Tramps (run by all my exes) and spend all of our combined tip money on pitchers of beer. (“Yes I realize it’s only 7:30 sir but we’re just about to close.”) I didn’t say this but one time I saw Dexter Manley trying to find his coke dealer at that same place. Remember that one year that he played for the Ottawa Rough Riders? Neither does he.
Jets @ Colts: So it comes down to this-Pagano’s thousand yard stare vs. whatever Bowles does that we should be making fun of. What do Tanzania and the Jets have in common? They’re both short of ivory. I had Ivory getting injured by wk. 4 but he up and done it after the first. Brown-noser! So now it’s Ridley or Powell, Powell or Ridley. So much to choose from! Moncrief gets not-Revis so he should do okay. Right? Right! Colts were ambushed by the Bills last week and the Jets lost to Cleveland. Hold up. They beat Cleveland? This is why we can’t have nice things. Play according to form, Jets team! One Jets blog I came across was yakking about Geno maybe coming back early from the punctured ear drum he suffered while listening to some chin music. Congrats Jets desperation, you have successfully disguised yourself as hope.
Fun game: If you’re watching the espn.go stream of MNF, when it goes to commercial break, try syncing up Michael McDonald’s “I Keep Forgettin” to the music ESPN plays instead of commercials.
Erik Walden dropping Fitzpatrick’s Checkdown perfectly sunmerizes this game.
If the Jest win this, all 12 people remaining in my office survivor pool go out, and I think only 7 picked the Saints.
Insurmountable lead right? 10-0…
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Chew, chew, chew
Yes, Chucky, it was a great job by the defense to have Futzmagic throw a full yard and a half behind his intended receiver. Brilliant fucking work.
Should have ran Spider 2Y Banana. Would have gotten that first down.
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At least Thursday is Giants/Skins. It won’t be good football, but there promises to be some entertaining derp.
Will you and scotchy get really super extra drunk and yell in the comments for the Good of the Party?
This needs to happen
Make it so, Numbah One.
Just got home from the gym. Did you guys know MNF isn’t on ABC anymore?
Berman??
yay boomers final drive woo
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I swear Monday night games have the most commercials. Even last night they let the assholes talk instead of just going to commercials on reflex.
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So will the Colts be having open tryouts for defensive backs at this point? Fat Humps can cover in space.
yo hump so fat he covers everything
Only a Harvard man would be smart enough to throw towards second string corner.
Can we stop turning coaches and players into shitty announcers? Please?
Moar libtard comedians, amirite?!
I got told my last pic was either too fat or too skinny. You will get both. I apologize. I picked the fattest one off the skinny blog, sorry.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/SeWKb0qVZpcec6wsupndQ4fbo1_1280.jpg
NO
I think they were just joking, at least I’d hope so.
SAY IT AIN’T SO VONTAE
Games like this make me curse not having ready access to really hard drugs.
Stupider computer watch company challenges smarter computer watch company.
We all lose.
Who goddamned wears a watch anymore? Wasn;t that the point of the time being on every device all around us at all times?
I wear a watch, but it’s a special watch my dad gave me when I finished grad school.
Am I watching a commercial about hay insurance? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON TONIGHT?!?
Fitzmagic loves a no back offense…. it means he finally doesn’t have to be a bottom.
Everyone in this android wear commercial must die. die a thousand times.
GWAN YOU LUMBERJACK
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Brent Burns would like a word Ryan
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Ryan Fitzpatrick attempts to use his education to solve the Travelling Salesman problem
Alternate universe Colts cheerleader.
*Alternate universe could be in my head.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/c52b54cd8d5771f27ba2a8591577be32/tumblr_nt5qoxAEXA1s2i1z2o1_1280.jpg
“Jessica, we’re gonna need you to play a stripper.”
“OK, but no nudity, right? Because I won’t do nudity.”
“Jessi— fuck. She’s a STRIPPER!! Y’know what, fuck it, just get me Carla Gugino and everyone will forget your stupid no-nudity clause.”
Carla is a much hotter WOMAN for my tastes. My alternate universe has Jessica nudity in it of course.
Also couldn’t find Carla with chaps like the Colts CLs sometimes wear; just fucking go with it.
That was one of those new screen passes, the one where no blockers go out.
SportClips: We have everything except good barbers.
SportClips: Because SuperCuts is, like, for fucking pussies bruh
Evening Folks! What i miss?
Nothing!
I wonder if Irsay is going to barge in on Woody Johnson and complain about Johnson & Johnson products as a cutting agent for his nose candy.
Are the refs being locked out again? Does this crew know that they are reffing a football game?
This will be my first year really giving pumpkin ales a shot. This is…pretty good.
http://www.elysianbrewing.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Website_BeerHeader_NightOwl.png
Number One on the list of things I don’t miss about drinking: fucking pumpkin beer.
ALL HAIL MCAFEE
At this point…its the meth keeping me paying attention to this fucking game…
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THAT CAMERA TECHNOLOGY SHOULD BE EVERYWHERE GAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
Is pylon cam what they stuck in Erin Andrews hotel room?
Other Brandon Marshall is gonna be pissed at FitzMagic
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WT?
I was at my dive bar for the start of the game. There were 5 people inside with me. I was getting ready to leave a few plays before the Jets INT. I said to no one in particular (since we’re all watching that game) J-E-S-T JEST JEST JEST! to amuse myself and the general area.
2 guys, wearing red and blue colors with Oregon Duck hats, look at me and say “calm down buddy, the Jets are going to the Super Bowl, don’t be talking shit about the Jets”.
I had no words. Words failed me.
Thursday Night Football: Now on Monday Nights.
Fitzception
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Too thick…needs more meth.
And maybe a nipple.
There is a nipple there, I zoomed in to check. I should probably take this down now that it is NSFW
Fitzmagic!
Holy Fuck that catch….
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view1/3687840/happy-dance-o.gif
That doesn’t seem like something a Harvard man should do.
Ryan Fitzpatrick and Bobby Jindal make me question the value of an Ivy League education.
But George W Bush was didn’t?
/At least he was a better painter than that… other guy.
If you couldn’t tell, I went to BU.
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Ahhhh fitz
Fitz-ception!!!! With help from Vontaze!