Your Monday! Monday! Monday! Night Game Open Thread

Tonight is the 45th anniversary of the first ever Monday Nighter! We’re gonna be treated to so many wonderful memories-mamember the time that Cosell called Alvin Garrett “a little monkey” and then denied it? How about the time that the self-absorbed Joe Theismann decided that everyone should see his tibia? My best csb memory of MNF involved me and my fellow staff guys trying to close the dining room that I bar-tended early so that we could get over to a bar called Tramps (run by all my exes) and spend all of our combined tip money on pitchers of beer. (“Yes I realize it’s only 7:30 sir but we’re just about to close.”) I didn’t say this but one time I saw Dexter Manley trying to find his coke dealer at that same place. Remember that one year that he played for the Ottawa Rough Riders? Neither does he.

Jets @ Colts: So it comes down to this-Pagano’s thousand yard stare vs. whatever Bowles does that we should be making fun of. What do Tanzania and the Jets have in common? They’re both short of ivory. I had Ivory getting injured by wk. 4 but he up and done it after the first. Brown-noser! So now it’s Ridley or Powell, Powell or Ridley. So much to choose from! Moncrief gets not-Revis so he should do okay. Right? Right! Colts were ambushed by the Bills last week and the Jets lost to Cleveland. Hold up. They beat Cleveland? This is why we can’t have nice things. Play according to form, Jets team! One Jets blog I came across was yakking about Geno maybe coming back early from the punctured ear drum he suffered while listening to some chin music. Congrats Jets desperation, you have successfully disguised yourself as hope.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
761 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Sill Bimmons

Clots’ Bataan Death March tonight.

hippofant

NOBODY ESCAPES REVIS ISLAND (alive)

entropy

Well hello there. You seem pleasant.

JustStopDude

Is it me or is the NFL matchups just impossible to predict this season?

Infinite Jets

Want to achieve my dream of seeing an NFL season where every team finishes 8-8.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

I needed an impossible 20 points from the Jets DEF to win a matchup this week. They’re at 18 right now.

entropy

Was it not just 2nd and 2 prior to the “fuck it HOLD EVERYBODY” play?

Senor Weaselo

I don’t know anymore.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

WatchESPN sucks balls when working properly, isn’t even working tonight. Just lost my other stream, I may be out. I will check MAYBE 4 of my other sites before I give up.

/ Yeah I want to stay for the end of this shitshow

nomonkeyfun

Reminds me of my last girlfriend.

No head.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

It’s a good thing colts have 4 feet because they’re running out of things to shoot themselves in.

entropy

Jesus Christ there were like 8 holds on one play….

Sharkbait

Luck says Fuck you Pagano. I do it myself!

nomonkeyfun

Whelp, the Jets have reached my predicted score for the tie breaker, but the Colts… well, lets say they need a few more.

Sill Bimmons

Andrew Luck at -0.67 in insanity league.

Sharkbait

Insurmountable 10 point lead?

entropy

Flacco’s not here to erase it….

nomonkeyfun

comment image

Doktor Zymm

THIS COLTS SECONDARY I CALL THEM THE THEBAN LEGION BECAUSE THEY ARE TOTALLY DECIMATED

ThePirateSloth

Door Flies Open: Come for the dick jokes, stay for the historical references and #themoreyouknow knowledge drops.

Col. Duke LaCross

The more Jon Gruden quotes, the better I say!

Senor Weaselo

I have to say, it’s nice that one of my teams decided to show up early in the game. It’s not the one I was expecting. Or the one I’d prefer, for that matter.

entropy

As enjoyable as this is, at some point the Colts may want to cover Marshall. It just seems prudent.

MikeWallaceAndGromit

I’ve changed my mind this pumpkin ale is horrible. I’ve been drinking it for an hour and it just won’t end.

Old School Zero

Which one is it?

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Elysian Night Owl, which is disappointing because I love Bifrost.

Old School Zero

Yeah, that one’s just kind of okay for most of a pint. It can get a little much, though. I have a Dark O’ The Moon in the fridge, but I know I like that one.

Tonight was a Sierra Nevada Oktoberfest. S’ok.

bferra01

When did Luck turn into Kirk Cousins?

ThePirateSloth

My liver is thanking me profusely for not being a Jets or Colts fan this evening.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The line was Colts -8, I thought that they would cover, I am an idiot.

JustStopDude

So now its “sucks with luck”?

The Mighty Feklahr

comment image

DEAR KAHLESS WTF CLOTS

entropy

This kills me every time I see it.

King Hippo

In the Pantheon of rapey nightmare cartoon mascots, Grimace is so very underrated ,, ppl forget that.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van
MikeWallaceAndGromit
Sill Bimmons

Luck Sucks.

Senor Weaselo

HODORCEPTION: THE CURSE OF REVIS ISLAND

upstate underdog

What the fuck is going on here?

entropy

Hahahahaha. This is fun.

Infinite Jets

REVIS WALKS

Smithchez

Got back home just in time for the HODORCEPTION! How the fuck you doin, boys?

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

Good, but I hoe the offense decides to do something here.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Did the teams switch uniforms before the game?

//just turned this game on

Dick E. Phuck
Mother Puncher

Some poor intern spent a month on that tedious fucking graphic.

upstate underdog

There has never been a black guy named Conner.

Moonbatting Average

Apropos of nothing, suicide pools suck. Goddamn New Orleans.

Spur

Revis formed the foot, that explains why Rex liked him so much.

ThePirateSloth

But only Harvard men are learned enough to know that when you are playing against “Corners 4, 5, and 6”, you go all Sex Cannon on them and throw it the fuck deep.

Old School Zero

IS HARVARD ELITE?

The Mighty Feklahr

It’s Superion!

Chuckhttp://forevertwentysomethings.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/Sad-Puppy-Face-Picture.jpg

Infinite Jets

Hey there fellers, how’s it going? I am enjoying this foot ball game! Things have been fortuitous thus far for my favorite team!

The Maestro

I didn’t know Butters was a Jets fan, but upon further reflection, this actually makes perfect sense.

The Mighty Feklahr
Sill Bimmons

AHHHHHHHHHHH TEEHHHH GOOOOOORRRREEE IT BUUUUURRRRNNNNSSSSSSSSSS

Sharkbait

Tonights role of the New York Jets will be played by the Indianapolis Colts.

jjfozz

Aaaaand I’m off to play the Forza demo. See you in the morning, dickwads.

Mother Puncher

Move aside rookie. Let a veteran show you how to fumble.