Your “Coke Is Poison!” Sunday Night Thread

NE @ Ind: [swallows bile and pride] I have to give the guy credit for saying what everyone knows and what never gets said in major media. There. I feel faint but I think I’m okay. What no one addressed is that Brady added, “Donuts are the Anti-Christ!” so the Pats may want to re-evaluate their concussion protocols. Look, the Pats are rested, this is a “revenge” game and Belichick has had two weeks to prepare. This will not go well for the Colts. Don’t get me wrong-I’ll be cheering for the home team but their D is porous and QB-wise this is a no-brainer. Prove me wrong, Luck.

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jjfozz

Downtown Indianapolis, where the streets are paved with doughnuts and the gutters are awash in gravy.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Make sackers slip like ice
Livin in an Amish paradise

Dunstan

In all seriousness, what exactly is supposed to be Brady’s motivation?
What did the Colts do wrong? They had heard a rumor that the Pats deflated balls, they asked the league to keep an eye out. Then they found a ball that seemed deflated during the first half, and asked the refs to check on it. It turns out that, yes, the Pats balls were below the specifications which, to borrow a phrase, NO ONE DENIES.
Everything else was done by the league. The Colts were pretty good about admitting that they got trounced and that the balls couldn’t have affected the outcome of the game.
So what is poor Tommy Brady getting “revenge” for?

WCS

NAHHATIVE

BrettFavresColonoscopy

FAHK YOU AND YOUR FAHKIN LAWGIC BULLSHIT

Mother Puncher

I have a feeling Brady doesn’t actually give a shit about this game.

Old School Zero

“Jamie Collins coming right down his throat.”

Cris is probably the best color guy to quote out of context.

bourb0nblues

… right down his throat? PHRASING CRIS!!

Gratliff

Wow. Get some, Hodor.

The Maestro

FAAAAAAAAACK

Sill Bimmons

Mr. The Maestro, you’re on the air on WEEI.

Care to elaborate?

The Maestro

FACKIN ANDREW LUCK IS A GAWD DAMN LUCKY BASTAHD WHO’S JUST GOTTEN LUCKY. NO ONE DENIES THIS!

AND WE GOT FACKING SCREWED ON THAT MCCOURTY PI CALL, TERRIBLE CALL! WE AHHH PERSECUTED!

(In all seriousness though, I thought that was a pretty weak call on McCourty, but that’s just me.)

Sill Bimmons

HOTELDOWN WOO

WCS

HODOR

jjfozz

My buddy on Edelman, “He’s the cockiest Jew I’ve ever seen. Moses wasn’t that cocky after he parted the Red Sea.”

Brick Meathook
blordinaryfagicmox

New England on defense, let’s still cut to shots of their offensive players on the bench because they’re white and recognizable. Fuck you, NFL broadcast director who gets namechecked at the end of games if it’s a blowout.

John Difool

Flags on the Patriots? These must be the untouchable refs.

entropy

There are always one or two a game that Pats fans use for the next week saying, “they get flags! What about (insert blatant penalty here) or (insert second unavoidable penalty here)” and then they can pretend they are in some way mistreated by the NFL.

jjfozz

I’m loving Trestman’s offensive calls.

“So, we’re at third and four, on the road, and inside the 30?”

“Yup.”

“Okay, Flacco toss that sucker into the endzone to that skilled wide receiver we don’t have.”

King Hippo

Well, I’d like to hear YOUR ideas to impress that hot middle schooler, smart guy!

jjfozz

Dropping trou and yelling, “Here’s the beef!”

Redshirt
Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Fleeee-nor?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I can’t think of a person to post pics of. I need suggestions.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Susan Sarandon

Dunstan

Someone mentioned Lisa Edelstein earlier. House, M.D. also featured Olivia Wilde, Jennifer Morrison, Anne Dudek….

blordinaryfagicmox
jjfozz

Sorry I’m late, been rewinding that Edelman interception for TD.

Couldn’t have happened to a better asshole.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

“Speaking of exploiting that hole, we go now to Erin Andrews”

makeitsnowondem

+1

aceg

Yes..? Yes.

WCS

Collinsworth: “The Patriots went back to what’s been working for so long.”
Wifey: “Cheating?”

entropy

Perfect. Utterly perfect.

Sill Bimmons

That’s a good woman you got there, bro.

You should totally Ice her:

http://lateorders.com/images/Sm%20Ice.jpg

Sill Bimmons

necrotizing scrotal neuropathy

John Difool

That Fallout 4 live action promo is pretty facking awesome.

Dunstan

Sorry, Al Michaels, that some of us are so tedious as to complain about how often YOU are going to mention Deflategate. Sorry we distracted you from your Brady-fellating

entropy

Serious question here: why is it that most fans outside of NE can generally see the Pats getting more favorable calls than any other team? Are we all fuckin nuts? Or is it real? And if it’s real, why won’t the NFL do shit about it?

makeitsnowondem

It doesn’t piss anyone off enough to make them stop watching.

King Hippo

winner winner

entropy

Solid point, and it goes a long way toward making me believe I’m not insane (well, for this reason, anyway).

Dunstan

It’s not like the refs just decided to favor the Pats on their own. The NFL created this beast, through wanting to “protect the stars” and “promote offense” and other instructions to the refs that carry a nudge-nudge, wink-wink, you-know-who-the-stars-are subtext.
It’s like asking why the Republicans don’t do anything about income inequality.

makeitsnowondem

So facking pumped fah Fallout: Hahvahd.

Old School Zero

Hopefully they let you nuke Foxboro

makeitsnowondem

(Don’t tell me it’s more like Fallout: MIT. I know.)

Gratliff

Goddamn. There are some fucking big games coming out right now.

King Hippo

she starts fires…in mah pants!!!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I was writing comment section fan fic as the Pats scored. I stand by my not giving a shit about that

entropy

You have my support.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

If I could make my not giving a shit more impactful I would hope it would tear 1 ACL a team by the end of the game

Sill Bimmons

i hate you worse than hantaaids you sentient anal fissure

The Maestro

SMOKE BLOUNTS ERRYDAYYYYYYY

makeitsnowondem

IN SOVIET INDIANPOLIS, BLOUNT SMOKES YOU

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

reply to
“Kraft: “Can you make a new rule to credit WR with INTs on tipped passes?”
Goodell: “Screw you!””

Goodell: I really mean screw me. You know I can’t resist you Bob. We belong together.

Kraft: Shut up bitch, Just do what I say.

Goodell: Sorry my love, should I suspend a few Colts players for making you look bad before

Kraft: ::pulls out dick with no prompting::

<3<3<3<3

Redshirt

Well, that mental images has reaffirmed my heterosexuality. Thank you.

entropy

What? Where the fuck is the face mask?

Sill Bimmons
entropy

Sounds about right. Al says he can see Montcrief with the ball, and NE gets it anyway after “no conclusive evidence” is seen on the replay.

Dunstan

That evidence was NAHT conclusahve! NO ONE DENIES THIS!

Old School Zero

They went to look at the reply, but all they got was video from the local Boston public access channel.

Horatio Cornblower

It’s killing my fantasy team but watching Brady get sacked never gets old.

Redshirt

I see the NFL Commissioner hasn’t had time to revoke Secret Article 12, Subsection 3, Paragraph 12, Subparagraph 2: “Every call must benefit the Patriots at all times. NO EXCEPTIONS!”

Sill Bimmons

BUT CAN JET FUEL MELT STEEL BEAMS

entropy

I am probably going to have an aneurysm next week when the Jets get fucked on every call.

makeitsnowondem

Battlecat’s asleep on the couch next to me and her little paws are twitching and awwwwww

blaxabbath

What the fuck? There are two teams. You can’t fucking say the name of the team with the ball right?

Bring back the scab refs!

Sill Bimmons

Wait, what?

Old School Zero

May all the fucks be clustered!

Sill Bimmons

SHADES OF COWHER

makeitsnowondem

I love this. I love it so hard.

makeitsnowondem

Never mind. I don’t know why Pagano thinks a replay will prove the Colts have the ball.

blaxabbath

Fine Fifteen…

1. Patriots – I know NE lost to a Clots team from a poor division, but I don’t see a better team out there.

WCS

15. (tie) Carolina Cam Newton just isn’t getting it done. Luke Keuchly’s leadership from the sideline is really what makes this team go.

blordinaryfagicmox

No gif to be found, a video will have to do.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpdhFdnn4pk#t=0m54s

entropy

WHAT THE FUCK AM I WATCHING?!? The COLTS ar competent and have the Pats on their heels?!

blaxabbath

Overinflated balls, man.

John Difool
BrettFavresColonoscopy

And that song is now in my head. Good work.

WCS

BURN IT ALL TO THE GROUND

Old School Zero

BAH HA HA HA HA EVEN BETTER

King Hippo

LOVE the surprise onside kick