![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
At this point it’s just a matter of where it’s going to happen next, right? I’m shocked, then not shocked and then resigned that this stuff is the norm in an otherwise good (not great-the term is over-used and what the hell is the criteria anyway?) nation with tons and tons of wonderful people populating it. There’s a dandy tilt featuring Louisville and MSU this evening as well as Cin/But, Duke/Ind, Cuse/Whisky. Gonzaga plays as does Golden State (going for 20 straight). The Leafs are looking to lose and the Rangers are playing the Potvins as well. Immerse yourself in the latter stuff so that you don’t drive yourself mad thinking about the former stuff.
Your Hump Day Open Thread
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I really want a decently-focused, decent sized copy of Avs in the dress on the right side of this photo. I have been unable to find one. Help a brother out.
This is never gonna get old. I wish my RL friends would get in on this joke so that when I randomly shout “NUDIE SUIT” at their homes they don’t start disrobing immediately. I don’t mind so much when the women do it, but the rest….
This is not my normal music, but it seems appropriate for today:
Gramps was a master of the long con.
Rock roll heals.
Roll rock heels?
That is just great acting, method or not.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/97c8e0bcc4351bd1ef0d4affe6e461ac/tumblr_nhqt0alvsD1r3qv9to1_500.gif
She has very nice legs. [Bad tennis pun involving the word -hand goes here]
I would very much like to unlace this dress:
http://nocoastbias.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/showbiz-anna-kendrick-elle-magazine-3.jpg
[suavely] Well, hello, there, Miss Kendrick. How are you this evening?
[[drops meatball sub all over self]]
[[[tosses aside sauted onion]]]
Now, where were we?
Your internet image search history has to be one of the most chaotic and randomly fun things to read in the world.
It is until you get to all the bookmarks for “Marco Rubio 4 prez!”
I tell you; the Secret Service pretty broadly defines the term “threats”. I mean a circus clown is a circus clown.
This image does NOTHING to dissuade me. There should be one of those minibooks you find at the checkout at Barnes & Noble dedicated to your seach history.
I’ve seen many gifs of this, but this one really allows one to study the left; well done.
While I normally feel that over-specialization is a bad thing, I think I could devote a few hundred manhours to Alison Brie’s left breast.
People! Think of the right breast PLEASE.
Please give.
Bless you.
And here I was being all generous and shit, allowing someone else time at the trough. Well, no more mr. nice undeniable force of decay in the universe at large! SHE IS ALL MINE NOW.
1….2….3…4…5…6..
six fetishes.
http://36.media.tumblr.com/aca2cff838668f95bcb49037a72cf870/tumblr_nhvtpuhcC91rzlikmo1_1280.jpg
She seems flexible and fun, but probably a terrible housekeeper.
She’s dusting the floor right now.
She may well be acting as a human Swiffer, but I don’t see this working as a long-term cleaning strategy.
It should be noted: I don’t CARE that she’s awful at her job, as long as she does nekkid splits and smiles at me. I’m just saying you’d need to be aware you still have to clean at some point.
Is it bad that I want a back up camera in my dash?
I misread the word “dash” the first time.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/1e69cb1ce34d2b9c0066d9869367052d/tumblr_np5dhp2Ue51qdgdpgo1_500.png
Loves his mama, loves PCP!
The TV show “Terriers” was unjustly and incorrectly canceled after one season.
Whew! Lucky thing that side road was there, or there could have been some trouble!
Goddamn lousy civil engineeers.
He’s turned to jelly!
I love the end of Airplane II, as Shatner describes how they should land the plane, and it’s just crashing to hell behind him the entire time.
Speaking as a submarine veteran, I feel it is my duty to point out several inaccuracies in this. The Officer of the Deck would never drape his hands over the handles of the periscope like that, and those are incorrect star patterns behind the flying ship. Jeez Hollywood: get your shit together.
Undeniably, today has been horrific. I think a palette-cleanser is warranted:
Is that Topher Grace talking about how much he hates the Browns in the background?
Afterwards, he and Ashton Kuchar went back to his parents’ basement to not indulge in any illicit activities and discuss the merits of Scientology.
I am quite glad this is the final season of The League. The show has fallen off quite a bit in the last few years, and this season is a goddamn diaper hamper of stank. The last few weeks have even brought in a filthy, hated Draft Kings subplot. Good lord fuck this show.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
EVERY week is e wrong week to quit sniffing glue!
I am returned from the side job, with a fresh Wawa hoagie and some diet Dr Pepper to get me through the next hour or so. I’m happy I missed out on hours of new coverage, and yet I feel rather behind on how things are out in the world.
I’m sure I could catch up relatively quickly, but so I really want to do so?
I’d stay away from Twitter…
Outside of the pictures posted by various attractive women, I tend to avoid Twitter as a general rule. I feel that anything other than threats or jokes should require more than 140 characters to express properly, without the added benefit of verbal and visual cues.
How’s things with the missus?
Holding steady. A little bleeding earlier, but, nothing she feels warrants concern. She skipped the gym, since her PCP told her to take it easy for a few days. Otherwise, things seem relatively normal.
No news = good news in this instance. Thanks for the concern.
I read up on things yesterday, but I wanted to be sure all was still well, or at least no worse. I’m happy things are holding steady.
My PCP rarely tells me to take it easy.
No shit. My meth is always saying, “settle down, take a nap,” and I’m always like, fuck YOU, meth, and then I take apart my neighbor’s car because I’m bored.
Good to hear, really good to hear today; thanks for the update.
Man, it was a tiring, downer of a day and I just fucked up a batch of cupcakes I’m making for my girlfriend’s birthday tomorrow. I’m gonna rally and salvage them and make them better, but, damn.
It’s gonna be all right. Somehow it always is, eventually.
I know I’m not good at the interweebs, but what is “I just fucked up a batch of cupcakes” code for?
Trust me: do NOT google it at work.
Thanks, we need some humor at this point; this gif is some gallows humor, if you’ll allow me.
http://s3.amazonaws.com/readers/2011/08/09/1243594993cupcakedogwarflashbacks_1.gif
I’ve never seen a dog with a thousand yard stare before… that poor animal. He’s what I imagine PK’s dog looks like every time the bathroom door opens.
That dog did two tours with the 82nd Airborne, 2nd Battalion, 505th PIR, Bravo Company ’69-’70
He’s……. seen things….. you people wouldn’t believe.
I don’t think he’ll ever get over Macho Grande.
We were side by side, fighting Charlie in the bush.
We were in the fucking shit man.
The fucking shit.
I was in Junior High, you asshole.
Tests came back positive for sheep herpes.
Ah fuck now the poor mutt’s got CTE, too?!
All the players and coaches that were on that Saints team are deathly afraid of cupcakes….. and Skittles.
CAIR Los Angeles is having a press conference right now. I’m afraid of what’s going to happen tomorrow.
[nukes Twitter account]
On Twitter, too, but that’s not what I’m worried about.
Does anyone know why Caitlyn Jenner drives a white 1967 MGB Roadster in the new South Park timeline?
I do not. I also think the continuous run-a-pedestrian gag is wearing thin. It was hilarious at first, now, just meh. We get it, Trey and Matt.
I’m pretty sure they’re just doing that because somebody has to die in every episode and they’re running out of new ways to kill people.
Have a blood test in 8 hours. Going to my happy place now:
http://www.simplytravel.co.za/gallerylive/Maldives_WLH_Kanuhura_Beach_album.jpg
Given the name attached to one of the suspects, I suspect Thursday will be so Trumptastic, that it will be renamed Trumpday.
Ted Cruz Mapother, Mike Huckleberry, and Marco Rubenstein will also beat their racist drums, too, but Trump will own them all with his hallucinatory recollections, calls for branding Muslims, and his insistence that the Patriots be renamed the “Trump Patriots” and that the NFL should cancel the playoffs and just reward the Trump Patriots the Super Bowl, because they’re almost as great as he is.
Gotta admit I liked “Ted Cruz Mapother”
Well done.
Feeling very small and powerless.
http://scienceblogs.com/startswithabang/files/2013/02/2xcluster.jpg
Sigh. Hokay, another round of apologizing to my children for bringing them into this world.
This was the wrong week for me to be sad about my dying cat.
Why?
It’s your cat. It’s your life. It’s your grief.
The dying of any light should be mercilessly raged against, because that the fire of life that fuels that light only shines once and can never be reignited.
Fuck these assholes. Never let them rob you of your emotion.
Sill’s goddamn right. You were closer to your cat than to any person who’s died or who is dying this week. This shit’s sad, but it’s not necessary or natural to feel worse about people you’ve never met than about an animal who’s been your faithful friend for years. We’re all just people, wanting companionship. We all care for our own first.
Keeping myself sane tonight by drinking lots of SN Celebration and trolling the “alternative right” (read: Trump fanboys) on Twitter.
It’s just the way things are now, and nothing is going to change.
After Sandy Hook, after little children and teachers were blown to to pieces by a lunatic with access to military-style assault weaponry, you had to admit defeat.
Not only was nothing done to tighten gun control, not only did many states pass legislation actually loosening certain gun control provisions, but the NRA had voices in the national news suggesting that this unthinkable massacre of innocent children and teachers was perpetrated as a false flag by gun control advocates.
At that point, what can you do? When the people on the side of murderers accuse you of murder for wanting murders never to have happened?
You give up. This is what Murka wants.
Murka wants its Tree Of Patriotism to be watered with the blood of innocents rather than tyrants.
Apparently, late- and after-hours trading has caused the stock prices of several gun companies to go flying up.
Because if there’s anything Obummer is known for, it’s takin’ our guns! So we have to buy up all we can before NObama does it again! Because if Barack Hussein Obama makes all guns illegal, then only illegals will have guns. GODDAMN ‘MURICA, FUCK YEAH!
My ex lived across the street from the newsperson killings in VA. She was so beat from working he night before, she slept through the entire incident, and woke up to police knocking down her door because that’s where that asshole rested before opening fire.
She was a half block from where it went down, and *she* was convinced it never happened after watching and reading so many of these “it’s all a front for gun control!” blogs and videos. Those people who make those things are scum.
I’m going to go read in bed until I fall asleep. I’m currently rereading the Sister Fidelma Mystery series. They’re a bit girly, but I’m a girl so that’s okay. They also have a lot of well researched background on old Irish legal codes and the conflict between the Irish Church and the Roman Church. The old Irish legal codes are quite interesting. They kind of remind me of comparing ourselves to Sweden. They have some amazingly good ideas, but it’s hard to see how we could make them work in a much larger, more diverse society. But all this thinking is getting in the way of sleep. Yesterday I was thinking in rhyme and it robbed me of some time I could have slept before the chime of…dammit. GOOD NIGHT.
You’re a girl? On a football blog? DISTRACTION!!!!
You know, being President must be a pretty awesome job. But it sucks in a lot of big, hairy, smelly ways.
I don’t envy Obama. Two mass-shootings ago, he got up in front of the press and expressed his frustration and exasperation that he has to keep going up in front of the press and talk about these mass shootings.
The GOP candidates’ response to San Bernardino? Thoughts and prayers.
The Democratic candidates’ response? We’ve got to do something to stop this from happening.
Never has the political divide in our country been so stark and so laughable at the same time.
Anyone who willingly wants to run for President is extremely naive and/or clinically insane.
THIS
No one who wants to be president should be allowed to. It’s a Catch-22 sort of job.
Short version of what is going through my head: Homeland violence incidents are one symptom of America’s overarching economic problem. You’re not fixing anything — security, poverty, unemployment, mental health, schools, consumer credit, the environment, infrastructure failures, FDA raids on kombucha/raw milk sales — without changing the economic flow. Period. It’s a bottom line situation. Anything else is either going to (a) simply not be enough (see NDAA/Patriot Act to increase the fed’s ability to ‘keep us safe/kill pat tillman’) or (b) eat up resources that will create a problem elsewhere (we got no money for schools because we spent it all on bailouts that went to bonuses for bankers!).
You’re on the same path that a lot of people who study terrorism are on.
Give someone an education and a mildly-fulfilling job, and you take out roughly 2/3 of their chances of sympathizing or affiliating with terrorist groups.
Address the global/regional geopolitical conflicts that are going on, and you take most of the remaining chance.
So, all we have to do is educate the masses and give everyone (at home and abroad) economic opportunity, and then solve the conflicts in Syria, Yemen, Afghanistan, Iraq, Israel/Palestine, between Iran and Saudi Arabia, and then the simmering conflicts in Egypt, Turkey, Sudan, Somalia, and between Ethiopia and Eritrea, and we’ve taken about 98% of the motivation for people to do terrorist acts! Easy peasy!
Wouldn’t want to end the pitifully low cap on FICA contributions, no sir!
After all, Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg have earned the right to only pay FICA contributions up to $118,500 in earnings!
This is the most fucked up part of Murka and the one most easily fixed, yet it will never happen because people like Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg are sociopaths who enjoy the fact that their very existence causes so much pain and misery that they need to ride in out of the sunset and promise to fix everything they broke.
Then they break everything else.
But… but… but… Zuckerberg’s gonna donate 99% of his FB shares to charity!
WOTTA GUY!
That’ll ONLY leave him with 1% of $45 billion, which is a paltry…$450 million. Oh, the indignity!
Also:
1) it’s a pledge, not a legally binding contract.
2) he has the rest of his life to do it. It’s not “starting tomorrow it’s gone.” He could wait until the next big thing comes, facebook starts cratering, THEN start dumping it after he’s divested everything.
3) he is a legit dr. evil waiting to happen.
Sill,
Even worse, at least Gates and Zuckerberg created something new and in someways revolutionary. It is the Chainsaw Al Dunlap’s that really destroy the economy.
Warren Buffett,; he will end a division of a company because it will always lose money. If he thinks you can make money, he might cut the number of employees, but that is really better long term, if you can keep going for the next 20, 30, 40 years.
These two are married; there’s hope for me after all! I do want to live Clarence!
http://assets-s3.usmagazine.com/uploads/assets/articles/56893-tina-fey-husband-jeff-richmond-never-stop-having-fun/promo/1350510938_tina-fey-jeff-richmond-441.jpg
Time for snoozies. Love you guys/girls. See you tomorrow.
The silver lining of the local NBC station’s coverage is that the helicopter guy is named Chris Christie. So the anchor says about once an hour, “We’re going live to Chris Christie overhead” and I imagine people looking skyward in terror, expecting to be crushed by a gigantic politician asshole.
Shit. Local NBC News just said one of the attacker’s name is Sayeed Farook. Well, that should calm things down.
Ted Cruz’s spokeman has already said all of the killers were twice-transgendered Democrat state senators from Hawaii who entered the country illegally through Mexico in a van full of weapons and FEMA camps.
Occam’s Razor.
Hmmm…guess not.
65th time’s a charm!
I thought the Browns copyrighted that?
Up to about 5-6 hours of watching news. My soul is completely crushed by this whole thing. I don’t think we have anyone in the San Bernardino area, but the Hangar 24 brewery is pretty close to there.
Anyway…I should change the channel, but I have no energy or motivation. On the plus side, Ted Cruz should have some HOT TAEKS about this pretty soon.
Fuck all of this.
It’s a pantsload of fun, innit?
Nothing compared to your week so far. Sure hope everything goes ok for you. We had issues within the first day after our daughter was born, and there is nothing (I repeat NOTHING) more stressful than that. (Everything worked out for our family after a really rough first month). All the best to you and yours.
What he said.
Hang in there.
Stupid winter making me tired all the time. The odds are pretty good on me falling asleep in the 9 – 9:30 range. I think I’ll have a couple glasses of wine and some cheese to move the line up to 8:45.
Night Cheese!
One of my favorite Seger songs.
Into The Badlands has a redhead kung fu sword fighter chick in stiletto heels. So I’m going to see if I grow hair out of my palms or go blind first. If ya know whatumtalmbout.
How is that show? I’ve dvr’d it up to this point, but haven’t watched any yet.
The wife watches it between WD and Talking WD. Not anyone you really care about nor much backstory how things got this way.
Yeah, that’s what I was thinking for some reason. But jacking it b/w WD and Talking made me feel like I should maybe give it a try.
Those marketing genius bastards!!!!
It’s like a live action anime. I don’t know if it’s a good show or not, but I’m enjoying it.
Your mention of the redhead sword chick in stilettos will like make me at least give it a shot if I’m being honest. Badass chicks make up for a lot of content shortcomings in my experience.
I’d describe that as more of a counterpoint.
You might have a….ummmm….point.
It’s ok. Good enough for me to give it a full season to show progress, a la Agents of Shield. Unlike Bastard Executioner
I’ve stuck with Bastard so far, but admittedly mostly because I really want to see Brattle/Gawain’s batshit crazy pseudo-wife’s head explode.
Dr. Mrs. Mayhem returns on Saturday. Surveying the devastation resulting from a month of feral living, I’m boned.
Expensive jewelry is your friend.
EVERY KISS BEGINS WITH KAY!
The Seamus speaks truth-get her a “I missed you so much” gift.
Then, blame it on the dog.
Which is cheaper, gift, or hiring a cleaning service to come in on Friday?
Yeah, but if it’s TOO clean she’ll know something is up.
Depends. If she’s the sort who would find that suspicious, there’s still all of Friday night to spill beer on stuff. Or, if she’s just happy not to think about what happened when she was gone as long as it’s all good now, then that’s not even an issue.
My condo was built in 1909. It’s a pretty decent bet someone has died in here at some point. I know for a fact that someone with a terminal disease has lived here in the past 20 years (but was apparently kinda psycho and didn’t die here.) I’m not even going to hazard a guess at the number of people who have had sex here before I moved in. The people I bought the place from had cats, so even ignoring any babies or infirm residents, a reasonable percentage of the apartment has had puke/pee/shit on it…..but it’s really nice now. Best to ignore the inapplicable past.
I was completely joking – if she commented on how clean the house was, he’d just explain that he wanted the house to be in good shape when she got home, so he hired a cleaning service.
/with these kinds of brown-nosing skills, I don’t know why I’m not a bigger success in the corporate world.
You actually read my entire reply and thought I was serious? 😀
She’s going to assume I had cleaners in no matter what.
On the Gusto channel Luke Nguyen (an Australian of Vietnamese extraction) is learning how two girls from Wales who have travelled through the American South are doing BBQ back in their homeland. If my German-Canadian step-mother saw this she would faint. My Ukrainian grandmother wouldn’t see it because she’s making perogies up in her Heaven.
Wouldn’t you pay good money to have seen Princess Diana attend a good ol’ redneck pig pickin’? That would have been awesome.
I’ve been to his restaurant in Sydney and met him briefly.
Nice guy, food was a little overpriced.
I’m assuming this post is talking about WHY? there are censored music videos on youtube; i mean, what’s the fucking point? I’ll just post this comment and then move on to my “California News” tab…
Is it? I thought it was about Navy quarterback Keenan Reynolds disappearing from ESPN’s Heisman voting.
This isn’t censored, but America did have the good taste to make sure Bud Dry was a flop.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pouOzsRLJM
About to have my yearly cry. Damn you, Valvano.
Then ‘Cuse, ‘Ville and BC need to get the job done.
I was explaining who Valvano was to my sons last night and both my wife and I got choked up. I loved that dude. (And not because he was Italian and had a huge nose, but that didn’t hurt.)
I met him on a few occasions. He really was larger than life.
Valvano just did not fit into the ACC at all. Dean Smith and Lefty Driesell were so Old South, and Valvano was so Bensonhurst. It was great.
6th grade Christmas Choir Recital at 8 pm. I know all of you are jealous. I am on my second glass of Buffalo Trace.
I’m gonna be hip-deep in dust bunnies in 30 minutes. You’re damn right I’m jealous.
One word.
Flask.
http://www.amazon.com/Phone-Style-Liquor-Leather-Funnel/dp/B000MELSJQ
It’s a flask disguised as a cell phone.
Another one, that looks like a smart phone instead.
If it was an 8th grade recital I’d be jealous.
[backs away from blordinary very slowly…]
What? 8th grade is peak-precociousness, is all.
Peak-precociousness is reached in 4th grade. EVERYONE knows this. After that it’s just creepy.
All the points for your choice of whiskey.
I read as Communist who have LIKED this comment:
Da.
This is an interesting article on the mass shooting phenomena I read a few weeks back :
http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2015/10/19/thresholds-of-violence
Weirdly enough, high profile crimes do have weird surges in popularity sometimes. This is a particularly deadly and tragic one, but hopefully it’ll pass soon. I also read a book about the wave of plane hijackings back in the 70s, and maybe this will follow a similar pattern and eventually fade back into obscurity.
Thanks for the link. I obediently started to read it but realized it’s not the right time for me. Perhaps tomorrow or Friday…
This was the main thing that worried me about the death threat I got. It happened less than 2 weeks after Umpquaa, so the “contagion” was in effect.
I am about to leave for a sideline IT job at soemone’s house. I have done work for this family for a few months now, and each time, they try to weasel down my rate. My house-call rate is VERY competitive, even cheap, and I discount it further for some folks depending on how long I’ve known them and how much work they throw my way.
Tonight? I am charging full price. This idiot decided to call around to other family members to see if I lower the price for them. Luckily I don’t, but fuck you for not trusting me.
Dontcha just love people? I’d have to really be in dire need of money not to tell that jagoff to fuck teh fuck off.
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